Ride Of Your Life
by Adrian Jade
Summary: One day you wake up and realize that everything you thought mattered to you doesn't. John Cena has a girlfriend who he thinks he loves and a best friend who he knows he will always love. What happens when on a random pit stop to a Walmart they find someth
1. Chapter 1

Title: Walmart Parking Lot

Author: Adrian Jade

Summary: One day you wake up and realize that everything you thought mattered to you doesn't. John Cena has a girlfriend who he thinks he loves and a best friend who he knows he will always love. What happens when on a random pit stop to a Walmart they find something that could change all of their lives. John needs to choose where his heart belongs.

Disclaimer: I own all the people that you don't recognize. Everyone else own themselves and their characters belong to the WWE.

Chapter 1

"John please pull over somewhere because if I don't get something to drink I am going to die of dehydration" Kelly whined.

Ashley Benoit rolled her eyes. Out of the corner of her eye she could see her best friend John Cena make an annoyed face.

"Yes please John pull over somewhere so I don't have to listen to your girlfriend bitch anymore" Ashley said from the backseat.

"Alright ... alright I'll pull over at this Walmart up ahead" John sighed they were already behind schedule as it was.

"And for your information I was not bitching Ashley" Kelly said in her snotty, stuck up voice.

"Whatever you say princess"

Randy Orton who was sitting next to Ashley snickered to himself. He loved it when Ashley and Kelly got to arguing, it was always entertaining to him. To say Ashley and Kelly liked each other would be the biggest lie anyone could ever tell. Ashley thought Kelly was a stuck up bitch and the only way she got her job was because she was Vince McMahon's niece and Kelly of course hated that Ashley was John's best friend and usually wanted to spend more time with her than he did Kelly. She thought was Ashley was a threat because she and John had dated once upon a time but it didn't work out so they decided to just be friends but Kelly could tell that John still loved her more than he would admit.

"John are you going to let her mock me like that?" Kelly asked.

John blinked a couple of times "What did you say baby?"

"Oh my god why do I travel with these people!" Kelly exclaimed to no one in particular mainly because no one was listening to her.

Ashley saw John wink at her in the rear view mirror and smirked proudly to herself. John pulled into the parking lot and Kelly got out.

"Don't take all day" Ashley yelled out the window to Kelly.

Kelly flipped Ashley off and continued walking.

"Don't be bitter because I slept with him first" Ashley yelled out the window again.

"Ash please don't patronize her" John said.

"Sure thing" Ashley put the book she was reading down on the seat and climbed over the back seat and took the seat Kelly had just vacated. She began playing with the radio stations while they waited. Lips of an Angel started playing on one of the local radio stations.

"I love this song!" Ashley exclaimed turning the song up loud.

"It's really good to hear voice saying my name it sounds so sweet comin from the lips of an angel" Ashley sang along with the song.

"Ash ... shut up for a minute" John said lightly pushing on Ashley's shoulder.

"What?" Ashley asked annoyed.

"I think I hear a baby" John said.

"John look where we are ... frickin Walmart of course you'd hear a baby here because parents shop with their kids"

"I know that but this sounds different" John said not being able to put into words the weird feeling that he was getting.

"Dude that sounded so gay" Randy said from the back seat.

"Shhh, there it is again" John said.

"John ..."

"Shut it" John snapped struggling to listen.

"Ok I heard that" Ashley said getting out of the car.

"Thank you" John threw up his hands getting out of the car also.

"It sounds really close" Ashley said bending down to look under the car.

"There isn't a baby under my car Ash" John said.

"You never know with the way you drive" she said.

"It sounds like it's coming from over there" John said pointing to some brush near a wooded area.

Ashley and John began looking through the brush.

"John maybe we were hearing things" Ashley said after 5 minutes of searching.

"Shh let's see if we can hear it again"

They stood silently for about 5 minutes and then heard a faint cry coming not far from where Ashley was standing. Both Ashley and John rushed over where they heard the sound and sure enough a baby boy was laying in the brush barely covered with a navy blue towel.

"Oh my god John he is shivering and turning blue" Ashley said picking the baby up "he's cold as ice"

"I have some blankets in the car" John said ushering Ashley and the baby to the car.

Ashley sat in the front seat examining the baby. Randy sat staring at Ashley not saying a word.

"Fuck he's a newborn" she said "here's where the umbilical cord was cut ... shitty job of who ever cut it"

"Here's the blankets" John said returning from the trunk with about 3 blankets.

"He can't be anymore than 5 hours old" Ashley said.

"How can you know that?" Randy asked speaking for the first time since his best friend came back to the car holding a baby.

"My mom was a pediatrician before she died she taught me a lot I guess she was hoping I'd follow in her footsteps but I never did" Ashley said sadly thinking about her beloved mother.

"Is he ok ... like is he going to make it?" John asked.

"We need to get him to a hospital like now" Ashley said.

John grabbed his cell phone from the cup holder and dialed Kelly's cell.

"She's paying for her stuff now" he said "we'll take him to the nearest hospital when she gets back"

The baby was looking from Ashley to John but never once did he cry. He closed his eyes and Ashley was afraid that he wouldn't make it to the hospital. She continued to rub his little arms and chest trying to circulate blood to warm the baby. John watched her while she did this and knew one day that she's either make a great mother or doctor but wasn't sure yet.

Kelly returned to the car carrying a plastic shopping bag in each hand.

"Why is she in the front?" Kelly asked.

"Just get in the damn car" Ashley exploded at her.

"Geez someone is on their period" Kelly said.

"Kelly if you don't get in this car now I will rip every precious blond hair out of your head" Ashley said in a dangerous tone that could only be matched by her father the one and only Chris Benoit.

Kelly did as she was told and got into the backseat without another word.

"He's needs medical attention now John" Ashley said.

"I'm trying to find a hospital right now Ash"

"Why are we going to a hospital?" Kelly asked Randy.

"For the baby" Randy said.

"What baby?" Kelly asked.

"The baby Ashley and John found in the bushes of that parking lot" Randy explained nonchalantly.

"Wait! What you guys found a baby in a parking lot ... why would you even pick it up I mean it could have diseases" Kelly said disgusted.

"Yeah well so could you but John still touches you doesn't he" Ashley retorted without second thought.

"Listen bitch ..." Kelly started but was cut off by John.

"Both of you just stop talking to each other right now we have more to worry about then whether you two like one another"

John sighed in relief when neither one said anything. They found a hospital about 15 minutes later after John stopped and asked someone for directions. The doctors took the baby right away and they all just sat and waited to see if the baby would pull through.

"Only in South Carolina would you find a baby in the grass" Kelly said.

"Too bad your parents didn't get the idea first" Ashley mumbled under her breath.

"What's your problem Ashley?" Kelly asked before getting a sick smirk on her face "maybe you are jealous that I have John and you don't"

"Oh yeah Kelly that is it" Ashley said sarcastically "I mean for all you know all the time John is with me I could be finding ways to seduce him right under your nose"

John smiled to himself he like the sound of that idea. But his smile was short lived because Kelly opened her mouth again and her next comment was meant to do major damage.

"Or maybe it's because I have a mother and a father and your mother was a whore who had AIDS and died"

"You stupid bitch" Ashley lunged at Kelly but was caught and held in place by Randy.

"My mother was not a whore she died of cancer you stupid fucking slut if anyone is the whore it'd be you" Ashley yelled hysterically. She fought free of Randy's grip and instead of going after Kelly again she walked away.

"Not cool Kel" John said getting up and following Ashley.

Ashley was so frustrated that she started pacing in a random hall. She collapsed onto the floor and brought her knees to her chest. The tears fell freely from her eyes, she felt someone put their arms around her tiny frame.

"Who the fuck does she think she is" Ashley buried her face in John's chest.

"Your mom wasn't a whore Ash, Kelly was just trying to get you mad it wasn't right of her and I'm sorry" John said.

"She didn't even know my mom"

"I know" John said stroking Ashley's hair "I know"

"What would I do without you?" Ashley asked finally calming down.

"I have no idea" John smiled at her.

Their faces were so close together John couldn't help himself he let his head fall. His lips touched her's in a very warm kiss. Reluctantly John pulled away.

"Ash I'm sorry I ... I got carried away" John tried to apologize.

"Don't worry about it let's just get back to find out how the baby is"

"Ok" John said getting up and helping Ashley do the same. They walked back to the waiting room but they sat away from Kelly and spent most of the time joking around and having fun, some people would say they were just being Ashley and John. The doctor who was assigned to the baby came out to see them. Ashley was the first one to her feet next was John and then Randy, Kate chose to remain sitting.

"How is he?" Ashley asked.

"It's a miracle you found him when you did he was very weak, we have him on fluids and under a heating lamp for warmth. It's amazing he survived he was so sluggish and near hypothermia when he was brought in but we think he will make it"

"Can we see him?" Ashley asked hopefully.

"I'm not allowed to let you ... you aren't family"

"Doctor we saved that baby's life the least you can do is let us see him" Ashley argued.

"I'm sorry but hospital rules say no person other than family or hospital staff can go near an infant"

"Doctor at least let Ashley in if it wasn't for her the baby would have died in the car" John said.

"Fine but just the young lady" the doctor relented "follow me"

The doctor lead Ashley towards the ICU, he watched as she washed her hands and stepped over to the incubator in the back corner of the room.

"Hey little guy" Ashley said coming to stand next to the incubator.

The baby looked at her and she noticed right away his striking pale green eyes. She placed her hand in the incubator and watched as the baby grabbed her finger with his tiny hand. She was awed by his tight grip. She looked at all the other incubators which had names on them and little trinkets that showed that someone obviously loved the other babies. This baby had no one to love him and it made Ashley really depressed. She looked at the little name tag on his leg it read # 56387654.

"You deserve a name little guy" Ashley said "doctor come here for a minute"

"What is it?" the doctor asked walking over to Ashley

"He needs a name" she said.

"We can't give him one" the doctor said sadly "that's social services job either them or the parents who adopt him"

"Well that could take some time he can't be # 56387654 forever"

"So if you feel so badly adopt him yourself" the doctor challenged her.

"I might just do that" Ashley said "I'll be back tomorrow with a few toys for him"

"Why do you care so much about this baby he isn't yours?" the doctor asked.

"I was lucky I grew up with two of the best parents in the world, then when I was 14 my mother died. Every child should have at least one person to love them and if that person for this baby has to be me then so be it at least he has some one"

"See you tomorrow then Ashley" the doctor smiled at her.

"How is he?" John asked when Ashley finally left the ICU.

"He'll live" Ashley said glaring at Kelly "what's in the bag?"

John looked a little embarrassed as he pulled out a little blue teddy bear with yellow paws and a green nose.

"I figured the baby might like it I saw it in the gift shop when Kelly sent me down there to buy her a candy bar"

"He'll love it" she smiled at him "# 56387654 will really appreciate it"

"What?" John said.

"That's his name # 56387654" Ashley said in disgust.

"Looks more like a William to me" John said.

"I was thinking Joshua" Randy added.

"Well you guys lets go find a hotel" Ashley said "I'm beat"

"Ok" John agreed.

"I thought we had to be in Seattle" Kelly said.

"We can risk staying here a little longer" John said snaking his arm around her waist.

"Uncle Vince isn't going to like it" Kelly said.

"Uncle Vince isn't going to like it" Ashley said softly imitating Kelly's high pitched voice.

"You are so bad" Randy said laughing a little "you can't even pretend to like her a little"

"Bite your tongue" Ashley scoffed "I'd rather eat thumb tacks"

"Looks like you and me are roommates" Randy said putting his arm around Ashley.

"Always good with me Rans" Ashley said "I mean you are like my second most important friend after John of course"

"Why is he always first?" Randy asked.

"Because I have a thing for Italian boys" Ashley said pinching Randy's cheek "and you Randal are not Italian"

"Neither are you ... in fact you aren't even American" Randy said.

"Touche Mr. Orton touche" she said "I am not American my father is Canadian and my mother was straight off the boat from Ireland"

"But then again you already knew that didn't you" she said getting into the car.

They found the closest hotel and the pairs went to their rooms. It was 4 in the morning and Randy woke up to get a drink of water. He left his bedroom to find Ashley sitting on the couch in the small living room studying her laptop screen intently.

"What are you reading?" Randy asked leaning against the doorway,

"Randy you scared me" she said placing her hand over her heart.

"Sorry I didn't mean to" he said "but again what are you doing?"

"Researching my family tree" she replied returning her attention back to the screen.

"Why?" he asked.

"Because I want to" she said "did you know that my great grandfather was mayor of Dublin at one time"

"No I didn't"

"Then there was my Granddad Phinnigan O'Connell he was the greatest man I have ever known" Ashley said proudly.

"What did he do that was so special?" Randy asked.

"It's hard to explain really it's more how I feel ... when I was younger I was scared to death of him but I could always tell he loved me and that carried over after he died and it has stayed with me always so that make him great in my eyes"

"What about your dad's side?" Randy asked.

"I don't know much about them, my dad lost contact with them when he married my mum seems they didn't like him marrying an Irish immigrant so they basically said it's either her or us and he chose my mum and you know the rest of the story ending with me and my brothers Keegan and Connor"

"How did your younger brothers end up with the Irish names and you got the American name?" Randy asked.

"Ashley is not American it's English?" she corrected him "the Irish equivalent of my name is Ashling which comes from _aislinge_ which means a vision or a dream. That was my mom's favorite name growing up but when she came over here she realized that Ashling would get a child picked on for their whole life so she switched to the "American" version as you like to call it"

"Wow that's creepy that you know that much about your name" he said.

"You are forgetting Randal that I have a middle name Fiona which I won't bore you with the details but let's just say there is an interesting story about that"

"Maybe another time" Randy yawned "let's get some sleep because were back on the road tomorrow which means a very long day"

"We have to visit the baby tomorrow I need to see that he is ok" she insisted.

"He isn't your problem you know that right"

"He isn't a problem at all Randy he's a human being ... how would you feel if your parents thought you were a problem?"

"That's the thing I'm not his parent and neither are you" Randy replied.

"I didn't say he was I was just trying to make a point"

"Just shut up so I can sleep" Randy led Ashley to her bedroom and waited till he saw her shut off the bedside lamp. He had no idea why Ashley felt so strongly about the little abandoned baby but he couldn't think of anything good coming out of it.


	2. Chapter 2

Title: Ride Of Your Life

Author: Adrian Jade

Summary: One day you wake up and realize that everything you thought mattered to you doesn't. John Cena has a girlfriend who he thinks he loves and a best friend who he knows he will always love. What happens when on a random pit stop to a Walmart they find something that could change all of their lives. John needs to choose where his heart belongs.

Disclaimer: I own all the people that you don't recognize. Everyone else own themselves and their characters belong to the WWE.

The next morning Ashley was sitting cross-legged in a booth across from John. It was about 8:30 and Ashley and John had been up since 6 but that was normal for them. They wake up spend about an hour to an hour and a half in the gym, then breakfast and then check out and back on the road. Randy and Kelly would be up sometime before check out usually about noon.

"I don't see why you need to work out Ash you are perfect the way you are and it's not like a script writer is seen on television" John remarked.

"How about this script writer stabs you in the eye with her fork ... or better yet hmm ... John Cena being the 6th member of the Spirit Squad that could be interesting" she said smiling smugly at him.

John shuddered at the thought "You are a manipulative bitch" he said in a good natured way.

"And to think I was a good little collage student who never did anything wrong till I met you in California working at Gold's Gym" she said.

"Oh you loved being corrupted" there was a double meaning to his words. Ashley knew he was referring to the fact that she was a virgin till she met him.

"You are an ass" she replied.

"Oh what was that I have a sexy ass yeah you've said that many times before"

"Your ego is smothering me"

"So what's on the agenda for today Tripmaster?" John asked taking a bite of his omelet.

"Well I thought we'd stop by and check on the baby and then go from there" she said gaining excitement "I wanna go see him"

"Ash we have to leave" John tried to reason with her.

"Please John" Ashley begged.

"Fine lets hurry up and do this" John said standing up and placing some money on the table.

"So do you think # 56387654 will like the stuff we got him?" John asked as they walked into the hospital.

"First of all don't call him that ... that is not a name it's a serial number"

"But it is his name Ash" John said in a calm tone "we can't can't call his anything different"

He ran his hand through his hair trying to think of a way to get through to his hard headed best friend. His frustration was running thin and it took all his self control not to snap at the one person who he knew always had his back no matter what. Ashley was the one person that wasn't related to him that he trusted completely.

"Ash I know you care about this baby I really do but we aren't his parents we are just two people who helped him survive"

"His name is Phinnigan" Ashley said.

"You actually gave him a name?" John asked amazed and a little creeped out.

"Phinnigan means fair" Ashley explained "this baby gets a fair chance at living why not have his name represent that, it was also my grandfather's name"

"But you named him ..."

"Just shut up while you are ahead" she said.

"I love you too"

The elevator bell dings and the doors opened. Ashley and John stepped out of the elevator. They saw the doctor from last night.

"Hello Dr. Burke" Ashley said brightly.

"You have 5 minutes because the people from The Chestnut Hill Orphanage are on the way" he said.

"You are giving him to an orphanage!" Ashley exclaimed outraged "why?"

"Because he is property of the state" Dr. Burke said.

"He's not a piece of land" Ashley fumed.

"Look do you want to see him or not because I'm doing you a favor by letting you see him"

"She'll be fine" John said clamping his hand over Ashley's mouth before she could say anything else.

"Ok then follow me" the doctor said "we moved him to the normal nursery this morning"

"That sounds promising" John said trying to improve Ashley's mood. His hand was still clamped over her mouth.

"Here we go" he said stopping at the door "just remember they will be here soon"

"Thank you" John pushed Ashley into the room.

"Which one is him?" John asked.

"He's the last one on the left" Ashley replied.

"How can you tell?" John asked.

"Well he is the only one who doesn't have a name tag on his bassinet thing" Ashley said giving him her famous '_you are an idiot' _look.

"Hey Phinnigan" Ashley said in a baby voice.

John just rolled his eyes. Dr Burke was standing there watching them. Ashley picked up the baby and held him close.

"We bought you some things" she said to him.

Dr. Burke looked on with pity it would be such a touching sight if he didn't have to remember that the baby was abandoned.

"John show him what we got him" Ashley said.

It took John a few minutes to register what Ashley asked him to do. He removed the blanket and bear from the bag and held them out to Ashley.

"Now lets get rid of this nasty uncomfortable blanket and get you wrapped up in this nice soft blue one" she put him back in his bassinet and switched the blankets before picking him back up again.

"See that is so much better"

John smiled at Ashley, he liked seeing this maternal side of her, it seemed so natural. He came to stand next to her and wrapped his arm around her waist and gazed at the baby.

"I wonder why his mother just left him there" John said not understanding how anyone could do that to a child they carried for 9 months and then went through all kinds of pain to bring into the world just to leave them in a Walmart parking lot.

"He is so beautiful" Ashley said looking into his unusual pale green eyes.

"Ahem" Dr. Burke cleared his throat "they are here"

"No John we let him go to that place" Ashley said starting to get upset.

"Ash we can't do anything about it" John said removing his arm from around her waist.

"No John ... we can't"

An older looking nun walked into the nursery. She smiled at John and Ashley.

"The doctor has informed us that you are the people who saved his life you should feel really good with yourselves"

"John please" Ashley begged.

John just looked on helplessly as the nun removed the baby from Ashley's arms. The minute she did he began to cry, Ashley looked like she wanted to as well. John led Ashley from the nursery and back into the elevator. She said nothing to him and stared moodily at the ceiling.

"There was nothing wer could have done for him sweetie if there was something I would have done it in a heartbeat" he said trying to hug her but she wasn't in the mood for it and shoved him away.

"Maybe this orphanage won't be so bad" John said trying to make her feel better but it did just the opposite.

"Don't tell me about orphanages John I spent 3 weeks in a group home after my mother died and it was hell ... not enough food or beds and the people were cruel, they didn't like kids and the only reason they took them in was because they wanted the money" Ashley spat violently at him "so don't you dare tell me that this orphanage could be nice because there is no such thing"

"Why were you in a group home?" John asked.

"After my mom died Chris lost it and threw himself into his work so he put me in a group home because he felt it was to painful to even look at me but then he came back from whatever mental trip he decided to take and brought me back home but the damage was already done ... no child so have to know the horrors I had to go through those 3 weeks, hell Chris doen't even know everything" she said. "John I may never have children because of that place"

"Ash I'm sorry" John said trying once again to hug her. She let him this time.

"I had never once in the entire 14 years of living ever gotten hit before and it wasn't like a slap on the hand they were full blown punches and it was always somewhere people couldn't see ... I went to the doctor's about a month after it happened and they told me the chances of me ever having children of my own are slim to none"

"Why haven't you ever mentioned this before?" John asked still hugging her.

"It's not exactly dinner conversation ... oh by the way I can never get pregnant or carry children to term because of the damages about 300 punches a day did to my abdomen" she said.

"The doctors never said you couldn't have children they just said it would be hard to concieve a child and carry it to term but with all the medical things they have now I wouldn't be surprised if one day you were able to give birth to a baby of your own"

"Keep dreaming John I gave up on that thought a long time ago" she said pulling away from him.

"Ash this side of you is scaring me you never seem this lost"

"So, what John I can't have a bad day for once" she snapped "it isn't everyday that I have to relive the worst time of my life ... I swear if you tell anyone about this I will kill you myself"

"Why would you even think I would hurt you like that?" he asked offended "I thought we could trust each other"

"I'm sorry John I know you would never do that to me but you are the only person who knows about this not even my dad knows it would kill him, he already carries enough guilt around for leaving me in that awful place"

"It'll be ok Ash" John said.

The 5 minute elevator ride seemed to take forever for the friends. Ashley had gone back to staring moodily at the ceiling and John just needed time to process what Ashley had told him. The doors finally opened and John took Ashley's hand to show her that he was right here for her and wouldn't be going anywhere"

"_I don't know what I would do without you"_ John remembered her saying the night before.

"I love you Ash" he said.

"Luv you too Johnny"

But she didn't understand what he was saying so he just dropped it for now. There would be a time he would have to tell her how he felt.


	3. Chapter 3

Title: Ride Of Your Life

Author: Adrian Jade

Summary: One day you wake up and realize that everything you thought mattered to you doesn't. John Cena has a girlfriend who he thinks he loves and a best friend who he knows he will always love. What happens when on a random pit stop to a Walmart they find something that could change all of their lives. John needs to choose where his heart belongs.

Disclaimer: I own all the people that you don't recognize. Everyone else own themselves and their characters belong to the WWE.

Chapter 3: Randy ... A Dad?

John sat drinking his second cup of coffee of the morning. He looked over at the empty seat across from him, Ashley's absence from their morning rituals didn't go unnoticed. John hadn't spoken to Ashley since he had told her he loved her the night before. He was about to leave when Ashley came bounding into the restaurant she threw some papers onto the table before having a seat. She looked like she hadn't gotten much sleep the night before, her hair was thrown up in a sloppy bun and she was dressed in sweat pants and a white tank top with one of John's grey zip up sweatshirts left unzipped. She wore no make up which was a rare sight to see because Ashley never went anywhere without at least lip gloss on.

"John I need your help" she said breathlessly "I have been up researching it all night I can't believe I didn't think of it yesterday"

"Ok I know that what you are saying makes sense up there" he said lightly tapping the side of her head "but I need it to make sense out here" he gestured to the space all around them.

"I realized last night that I am 24 years old and not getting any younger and telling you that I can't have children finally made it real to me I guess I needed to hear it to finally get a grasp on it but just because I can't have children of my own doesn't I can't have children John"

"Ok that's great that you have accepted that but what does it have to do with anything?" John asked.

"I want to adopt Phinnigan" she said.

"Ash are you sure about this raising a baby on your own isn't something to tread on lightly" John advised her.

"My dad did it with me and my brothers" she pointed out.

"Yes but you were 14 and your brothers were 12 and 5 when your mother died, it's not like you guys were newborns who demand constant attention"

"How do you know so much about newborns?" Ashley asked "I remember when my brothers were babies and my cousin Danica has a now 2 year old daughter Lily"

"That may be true but I can always work from home and I have Isabella with me"

John cringed at the mention of Ashley other best friend and roommate Isabella Anchillia. John liked her well enough but he thought Isa would cause more harm to the baby than good ... Isa wasn't a fan of little children. A waitress came over and gave them both fresh coffee and took Ashley's breakfast order.

"I still don't see what this has to do with me" John said "how do you need my help?"

"I need you to pretend to be my fiancée"

John choked on his coffee "I'm sorry you want me to what!"

"I need you to pretend to be my fiancée because the people who approve the adoptions find it better if a child has two parents instead of one" she explained.

"So you want me to be your baby daddy" he said speaking in slang.

"I hate you but yes I guess that is what I want you to be ... well just on paper you don't have to be you have a choice"

"So it's either daddy or Uncle John correct?" John asked.

"Whichever you are more comfortable with" she replied.

"So let me get this straight you want me to pretend to be your fiancée so we can adopt a baby together" John had to laugh, this was absurd "my girlfriend is going to love this one"

"John after all the shit I have done for you over the years and I have never once asked you for anything ... you owe me"

"What have you done for me?" he asked getting irritated.

"Gee covering for you with Vince when you are too hung over to even think straight not to mention who is the one who takes care of you while you are drunk because it certainly isn't Kelly sitting there with you in the bathroom rubbing your back while you vomit ... and don't even get me started on how many times I have to answer your cell phone when your parents call and you are out doing something stupid"

"So now you want to throw those times back in my face"

"No John but you asked what I did for you and I answered them and I have never once regretted helping you out because I care about you and don't want to see you get hurt and you know that I would do anything within reason to help you but can you say the same for me?"

"Even if this does work Kelly would freak"

"Why does it always have to be about her?" Ashley asked "if she doesn't want to see Phinnigan she doesn't have to and to tell you the truth I'd rather she didn't"

"I'm not asking you to give me your kidney or anything like that all I am asking you is to help me become a mom to a little boy who has no one else in the world"

"Of all people why me?" he asked.

"Because out of all people you are the only one I would want to share an adoptive son with" she smiled at him.

"What about Randy?" John asked.

"As much as I love him he is like my older brother I have known him since we were both little so it's weird and besides I wouldn't let Randy alone with a newborn because he'd scar the poor baby for life with his cockiness"

"Is this what you really want?" he asked.

"Yes this is what I really want" she said "I called my lawyer this morning and he is getting the papers together all I need is for you to say yes"

"Then yeah let's do this" John said smiling at her for the first time.

"Good I already bought the tickets and called Vince" she said "I told him your cousin Timmy was in the hospital and you didn't feel you could go see him by yourself"

"But I don't have a cousin Timmy" John said.

"I know you don't that is why I said it ... I was going to say my cousin Timmy but Vince would have gone to my father and been like I'm sorry to hear about your nephew Timmy and Chris would have been like I don't have a nephew named Timmy" she finished off her sentence with a very good imitation of her father.

"It's scary how real that sounded" John said.

"I've lived with the man for a long time" she said "are you ready to go because our plane leave in 45 minutes and I've already packed for both of us"

"How ...?" he asked.

"John you leave more of your clothes with me than you do anywhere else I should have a yard sale and sell them all" she said rolling her eyes "you'd think we were married"

"Well my dear we are pretending to be getting married" he said "so tell me how did I propose?"

"You really want to know?"

"Yeah"

"Well you recreated our first date ... remember mini golf and then watching the meteor shower from that beach but instead of there being a meteor shower we just sat there and looked at the stars. While I wasn't paying attention you slipped the ring on my finger and then you go will you and I am like will I what and then you say look down at your hand. So I look and I start to cry and say yes ... blah blah blah some sappy romantic kissing scene"

"Wow who knew I could be so romantic?" John comments.

"You can when you want to be but you usually only want to be romantic when you know you are going to be in trouble"

"Remember the time I thought I lost your dog Coco?" John asked "and I was so close to just going out and trying to find you another one when you came home and reamed me for not watching her good enough and then you were kind enough to explain that she was with you the whole time so I was killing myself for a week when she was with you the whole time"

"You learned to be a better baby sitter didn't you" Ashley said smirking "what I do remember was you being like baby let's cuddle every 2 seconds because you didn't want me to go searching the house for her when she didn't come when I called her"

John laughed a little "I thought you were going to kill me till Coco came running into the house from the backyard"

After Ashley finished her breakfast they went back to her room to grab their bags. Randy was waiting for them his own bag was packed as well.

"I want to go" he said.

"Why?" both Ashley and John said at the same time.

"Because I am the uncle"

Ashley and John exchange looks.

"You coming" Randy yelled from down the hall.

They both grabbed their bags and followed behind Randy. As they neared the elevator Kelly was coming out of it. Ashley grip on John's hand tightened.

"Stick to the story for now" she said in a tone barely above a whisper.

"John sweetie I heard about your cousin" Kelly said sympathetically "I didn't even know you had a cousin Timmy but then again you haven't introduced me to your family yet"

Ashley had to bite the inside of her mouth to keep herself from saying something not nice to Kelly but John could see a glint in Ashley's grey eyes that said she had something ready.

"I really don't understand why you didn't invite me to go with you but she's going"

John let go of Ashley's hand and went over to Kelly he cupped her face in his hands and stared into the brown eyes trying to look a sincere as possible.

"My family doesn't really like outsiders and to bring you to meet them while something like this is going on would only make matters worse I want you to meet them when the time is right"

"Ok sweetie" she said still sounding a little bitter and disappointed.

John kissed the bridge of her nose and Ashley could have sworn that she threw up a little in her mouth.

"Well I'd hate to break up this little love fest but we have somewhere to be" Ashley said impatiently.

"She's right Kelly I'll call you when we get there"

Ashley followed Randy into the elevator and John got in a few seconds later. Ashley waved to Kelly as the doors closed and then stood leaning against the back of the elevator with her arms crossed smirking proudly to herself.

"She seemed a little irritated that once again I spend more time with you then she does" Ashley said to John.

"You aren't helping the situation any" John said.

"Oh yeah I'm supposed to make life easier for that skank get real"

"She's still my girlfriend Ash and whether you like it or not she is going to be part of Phinnigan's life"

"You are naming the poor kid Phinnigan?" Randy asked.

"Yes" Ashley said smacking him upside his head "Phinnigan William Joshua"

"Hey I am the one who came up with Joshua" Randy said.

"Yes and John added William" Ashley said "I decided that since you two are going to be major factors in Phin's life you the names you picked out for him should be added also"

"What's his last name?" John asked.

"I haven't decided yet" Ashley admitted.

"Ashley if this stuff is gonna happen I want it to be for real Phinnigan is going to be my son too so he should have my last name" John said.

"Yes but he is going to be living with me so he should have my last name" Ashley argued.

"The child should always have the father's last name so he will have my name end of story"

"What do you think Randy?" Ashley asked.

"I agree with John" Randy said.

"Men" Ashley huffed.

"Remember sweetie we are engaged so it will be expected that the baby have my last name" John reminded her.

"Ewww you and Ashley being engaged scary thought" Randy said.

"Oh shut up" Ashley hit him again.

"Abuse I'm going to tell these people not to give you custody of the poor baby" Randy complained rubbing the spot where she hit him.

After a 20 minute car ride where Ashley and John continued to argue about the baby's last name they arrived at the airport and boarded the plane. Luckily for Randy his seat was no where near Ashley and John's so he didn't have to listen to them arguing anymore. He took his Ipod out of his pocket and placed the headphones in his ears. Finally peace and quiet without having to listen to Ashley and John argue about the baby's last name as strange as it was to think about it also seemed kinda natural.

"John why must you fight me about this?" Ashley asked exasperated.

"Because I am a man and there are just somethings that are expected ... death, taxes, and that your kids are going to have your last name"

"I can't believe we are fighting over a baby we don't even have yet" Ashley said.

"Screwed up ain't it"

"You have no idea"

"You know the name Phinnigan is starting to grow on me" he admitted "Phinnigan William Joshua Cena has a ring to it"

"Fine whatever I don't want to argue about it anymore you win ... geez I thought you didn't like kids"

"I never said I didn't like kids what I have said in the past is I am too much of a loose cannon to be someone's father but that's the beauty of it I can be the fun guy and then you can be the person who fixes everything when I screw up"

"Gee John sounds like so much fun and besides you could surprise yourself but actually being a good dad"

John scoffed "How do you figure that"

"Well you were raised by a pretty great dad so learn from his example" Ashley said closing her eyes.

"I did have pretty great parents didn't I" John said. That was another reason why he loved Ashley was because she fit in so well with his family. Unlike Kelly who had been raised to be a spoiled brat Ashley was very humble and down to earth. Both his parents loved Ashley and were very disappointed when they broke up but they settled for John and Ashley being best friends.

"The best" Ashley said starting to doze off, for some strange reason airplanes made her sleepy.

John got comfortable in his seat and he too doze off. They woke up just as the plane was preparing to land.

"Ugh I always tell myself I'm not going to fall asleep on planes cause my back and neck always hurt after but then I keep doing it" John said wincing at the pain in his neck and back.

"Suck it up we get to see Phin in a little while"

"That should be interesting"

"Very" Ashley agreed.

They met up with Randy and rented a car. While the guys grabbed the bags Ashley got the directions to the orphanage from one of the women who worked at the airport.

"Why do you wanna go to the orphanage?" the woman who gave her the directions asked.

Ashley thought it should have been obvious but she decided to answer the woman's question "my fiancée and I decided to adopt a baby and we heard great things about this orphanage" she lied. She wasn't sure why she lied she just felt that this woman didn't need to know all of her business.

The woman nodded and Ashley sighed in relief that she didn't ask anymore questions.

"Well y'all have a good day and good luck with your baby" she said warmly.

Ashley swore she thought the woman was going to hug her and that would have been a total invasion of personal space. That would just be way too much Southern hospitality. Luckily Randy's "lovely" people skills came handy.

"Ashley get your ass in the car now" he yelled from the backseat.

"I have to go but thank you for the directions" she said.

"Sure thing hun"

"Thank you Randy" Ashley said getting into the passenger seat.

"Your welcome but what did I do?" he asked.

"That lady who gave me the directions also gave me the creeps" Ashley shuddered and pulled John's sweatshirt tighter around her body.

"Oh was she a lesbian?" Randy asked intrigued.

"Dude stop being a sicko" Ashley said.

"Come on Ash that could be interesting" Randy said.

"Yeah so could me shoving my foot up your ass" she replied.

"Now kiddies be good" John teased them.

"Bite me" Ashley said.

John's eyebrow arched and Ashley could see his upper lip twitch, she didn't need to read his mind to know what he was thinking.

"Oh my god I am surrounded by perverts!" she exclaimed.

"Sorry we're just guys" Randy said.

"Lord get me out of this car" Ashley said.

They finally got to the orphanage and Ashley jumped out of the car just to get away from Randy and John.

"Well here goes nothing" John said linking hands with Ashley.

They entered the small building, it was clean and warm but Ashley's senses were on full alert by now. John squeezed her hand to show that he was there with her.

"Sister Agnes there are some people here" a little boy yelled upon seeing the 3 adults.

"Hi my name is Dean what's yours?" he asked Ashley.

"It's nice to meet you Dean I'm Ashley and the big guys that are with me are my fiancée John and my friend Randy"

"What does fiancée mean?" Dean asked.

"Never mind" Ashley said "how old are you"

Dean smiled and help up 4 chubby fingers.

"Wow four year old" Ashley said like it was the most amazing thing in the world.

"Yep I'm a big boy now"

"Sorry to keep you waiting" a young nun greeted them "I expect Dean has been a good host in my absence"

"Yes he has" Ashley bent down so that she was level with Dean "it was nice to meet you Dean"

He smiled shyly at her and ran off into another room.

"Dean is one of our favorites" the young nun said "I am Sister Agnes I run this orphanage"

"It's nice to meet you Sister Agnes my name is Ashley Benoit and this is my fiancée John Cena and our good friend Randy Orton" Ashley said.

"I thought you two gentle men looked familiar" she said "some of the older boys watch wrestling I'm surprised Dean didn't say anything he is a big fan of Mr. Orton"

Dean ran back into the room "Are you really Randy Orton?" he asked excitedly.

"Yeah little man I am" Randy said.

"I told Sean and Gregory but they didn't believe me" he said.

"How about you take me to meet Sean and Gregory while my friends take care of their business" Randy suggested.

"Ok" Dean grabbed his hand and pulled him out of sight.

Sister Agnes smiled "He is going to be the most popular kid in the orphanage for weeks to come"

"So Sister Agnes to get to why we are here John and I want to adopt a baby ... a baby boy" Ashley said.

Sister Agnes looked at them strangely for a moment and Ashley could tell she wanted to ask why.

"I can't have any children of my own" Ashley explained.

"Oh I am so sorry to hear that" she said sadly "but I'm glad you decided to come here the kids here could all use good homes with parents who will love them, we do try but we can only do so much for them"

"I think Randy has fallen in love with Dean" John said.

Ashley looked to where John's gaze was and sure enough Randy was sitting on the couch with Dean on his lap talking to the other older kids. He messed up Dean's hair and the boy couldn't help but grin proudly.

"So what age where you looking for?" Sister Agnes asked.

Sister Agnes's question broke John and Ashley out of their cute thoughts.

"Umm ... well a newborn would be nice" Ashley said.

"We have 4" Sister Agnes said "please follow me"

"Rans you gonna be ok out here but yourself?" Ashley asked.

"Yep"

"This is where we keep the infants and some of the toddlers" Sister Agnes explained.

"How long has Dean been here?" Ashley inquired.

"Since he was 7 months old his parents were killed in a car crash and no family could be found" Sister Agnes replied.

The room was brightly painted in a pretty yellow color and there were about 12 cribs that lined the room. Ashley wondered which one their baby was in.

"Like I said we have 4 infant boys you can take a look at them and see which one you like"

Ashley thought it was odd that the nun would phrase her words like that but she didn't say anything. Each crib had a name on it, the first crib they looked at read the name Sam but it wasn't the baby they were looking for. The next baby was named Stephen but again nothing. The third baby's name was Nathan and again not their baby. Ashley prayed that someone else hadn't adopted him first. The last crib was closest the the window the name on it read Kaleb. Ashley felt her heart start to race, her mouth became dry as she neared the crib. She peered in and sure enough her little green eyed baby was lying in the crib. His eyes seemed to brighten when he saw her and Ashley could have sworn that he smiled but she knew it was impossible because he wasn't old enough to smile. She picked him up and just looked at him as if seeing him for the first time again. It was a surreal moment, for a while Ashley thought she would never see Phinnigan again. John walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her waist and with his other hand he took the baby's smaller hand in his own.

"Hey little guy" he said.

"Funny you chose him" Sister Agnes said "we just got him yesterday poor thing was abandoned in a Walmart parking lot thank the lord for those people who found him, it is a very sad thought if they hadn't"

"I totally agree with you"

Ashley got a good look at little Phinnigan he was wearing a outfit that looked to be about 3 sizes too big but other than that he looked ok which relieved Ashley to no end.

"We have been calling him Kaleb but he has no real name" Sister Agnes said.

"Ashley always wanted a son so she could name him after her grandfather isn't that right sweetie"

"Yes baby it is" she said "Phinnigan William Joshua Cena"

"Sounds like a good strong name" Sister Agnes said giving the young "couple" her approval.

"Let's see if we can make this happen" Sister Agnes said leading them out of the room.

"Dean grab your things you are coming home with me" they heard Randy say.

"Rans what's going on?" Ashley asked.

"I just signed the papers ... I adopted Dean"

"Huh?" both Ashley and John said.

"Well if you guys can adopt a baby why can't I adopt Dean?" he asked "Sister Agnes runs this orphanage with another nun Sister Michelle and she asked me if I wanted Dean and I said yes and signed the paper and pending a court date to see how Dean is doing he is all mine"

"You guys really will give kids to anyone won't you" Ashley remarked "the man barely knows how to dress himself and you are giving him a kid"

"I resent that" Randy said.

"Daddy do I have time to say goodbye to all my friends before I leave?" Dean asked.

"Sure you do buddy" Randy said.

"What if Madonna and Angelina Jolie can adopt children why can I" Randy pointed out "not to mention Angelina was single when she adopted Maddox and Zahara"

"Yes but they are multi-millionaires and can do whatever they want because they have the money" Ashley said.

"Well neither you, me, or John are broke we all have financially stable jobs with good benefits" Randy said "plus I have a nice house where Dean can have his own room and seeing as we spend more time at your house than we do anywhere else Dean can have his own room there too because your house is huge and you have like 6 extra bedrooms"

"Your parents are going to kill me" she said putting her hands on her hip "I am supposed to keep you out of trouble"

"I'm older than you are"Randy pointed out "if anything I should be keeping you out of trouble"

"Ok kids how about we all keep each other out of trouble" John said reasonably because he was the only one who remembered where they were standing and why and for that matter who was watching them, because she had the power to take both Phinnigan and Dean away from them.

Sister Agnes looked at Ashley and Randy amused. She could tell that both cared deeply for the other and Ashley was only looking out for Randy as well as Dean's wellbeing.

"Randy if you really want to adopt Dean than good for you but parenting isn't going to be easy trust me I know I have been raising you and John for god knows how long"

"So you have plenty of parenting experience then" Sister Agnes couldn't stop herself from saying.

"Believe me Sister I have more than enough"

"Ok daddy I'm back" Dean hugged Randy's leg.

"Well we are almost ready we just have to wait for Ashley and John to get evaluated so they can take baby Phinnigan home"

"Phinnigan that's a funny name" Dean laughed.

"Well let's go to my office then" Sister Agnes said.

She had a seat behind her desk and waited for everyone else to grab chairs. Once everyone was seated she began to speak.

"What will happen today is we will let you take Phinnigan as well as Dean home and after 3 months for Dean and 1 year for Phinnigan you will have a court date just to make everything official"

"Why is it so much longer for Phinnigan?" Ashley asked.

"Because Phinnigan was abandoned so there has to be a certain time period for the biological parents to come for him ... standard rules which I think are rubbish but there have been a few cases where the biological parents do show up and want custody of their child back" she explained.

"But he'll get to live with us until the court date right?" Ashley asked.

"Yes"

"So he won't legally be our son till a year from now?" John asked "so how are we supposed to take him to the doctors and things like that if he doesn't have a name?"

"He'll have a name because after you leave I have to call up the hospital where Phinnigan was found and tell them he was adopted so they will fill in Phinnigan's name on his birth certificate"

"Ok I guess that will have to do" John said.

"Don't worry Mr. Cena I have seen cases like this before and 9 times out of 10 the biological parents never show up"

"Let's sign the papers because I want to go shopping for Phinnigan and Dean" Ashley said excitedly.

"Great spending our money" Randy groaned.

"Your are a father now Randy your money will never be yours again isn't that right Dean" she ran her hand through his hair.

"Yep" Dean grinned at her.

"You want Auntie Ashley to spend all Daddy's money on you right?" she asked.

"Yep"

John laughed at Randy's expense.

"You aren't any better she's your fiancée" Randy reminded John.

It was then that John remembered that they had lied to a nun. Well actually it was only Ashley who lied to a nun but he had done nothing to correct it.

_'Oh god we're going to hell' _he thought to himself.

Sister Agnes handed Ashley the papers which were exactly what he lawyer faxed her over earlier but still she read over everything before signing them. Then she handed the papers to John, he had a harder time signing that Ashley did because he was holding Phinnigan. But he signed the papers and slid them across the desk to Sister Agnes, who read them over just to make sure everything that needed to be signed was.

"Well everything seems to be in order of course there will have to be spontaneous visits to see how Phinnigan and Dean are doing" she said.

"We live in Connecticut that is ok right?" Ashley asked.

"Yes that is fine" Sister Agnes said "either me or Sister Michelle will fly out to see you"

"Well let's hit the road" Ashley said.

"Goodbye Dean" Sister Agnes said kissing his cheek "be good"

"Bye Sister Agnes"

"Bye Phinnigan" Sister Agnes said running a hand over his bald head.

"Bye everyone" Dean yelled walking out of the building.

There was a chorus of goodbyes from the kids. Dean waved as Randy helped him into the car.

Ashley got into the passenger's side of the car and pulled out her cell phone. She looked into the back of the car to see John putting Phinnigan into the car seat they had stopped to buy before coming to the orphanage. She dialed a good friend of her's number.

"_Ashley sweetie to what do I owe this phone call?" _Ashley's good friend Kyle Harrington asked.

Kyle was on of the top interior designers in all of Connecticut.

"You know how you have wanted to do something with some of the extra rooms in my house well do I have an assignment for you" Ashley said.

"_Please tell me you are finally going to let me turn a room into a swinger's room for your wild parties"_ Kyle said.

"Sorry Ky but no I need two rooms for two very special little boys" Ashley said looking into the back seat and Dean and Phinnigan.

"_Ok who are they?"_ Kyle asked.

"My new adopted son and nephew" she said.

"_Wait a minute you adopted a son?" _Kyle asked.

"Yeah, Phinnigan William Joshua Cena"

"_... you adopted a son with John?" _Kyle asked shocked.

"Yeah I know freaky isn't it but yes me and John are parents now and Randy adopted a 4 year old boy named Dean" Ashley explained "so I need you to make them some bedrooms that will make them feel welcomed"

"_How old is Phinnigan?"_

"He's 3 days old" Ashley replied.

"_Oh a nursery can't say I haven't done any of those but don't worry sweetie I will make sure everything is fabulous by the time you come home" _Kyle said _"when are you coming home"_

"2 weeks"

"_Ok well I need to plan some stuff but you have my guarantee that you will love everything"_

"Thank you Kyle you are the only one I would trust with this job" she said

"_Well my love I will talk to you soon"_

"Ok bye"

Ashley hung up her phone.

"So how is Kyle?" John asked with a hint of distaste.

"Why doesn't John like Kyle?" Randy asked.

"Because Kyle is G A Y" Ashley spelled out the word gay so not to tip off Dean.

"Daddy what did Auntie spell?" Dean asked.

"I'll tell you when you are older" Randy patted the boy's head.

"I can spell D E A N ... see I spelled my name"

"You did a very good job sweetie" Ashley said "we need to get him a car seat"

"I don't want a car seat" Dean complained.

"Well you need one so stop complaining" Ashley commented.

"Daddy tell her I don't have to get one" Dean gave Randy "the puppy dog eyes"

But Ashley shot Randy a death glare that dared him to defy her. He knew that Ashley's wrath was worse than anything that Dean could come up with.

"It won't be that bad buddy" he said.

Ashley smirked to herself and turned her attention to her phone once again. She dialed her home number and waited for Isabella to answer.

"_Hello" _ a groggy hung-over sounding Isabella answered the phone.

"Sorry Isa did I wake you"

Isabella looked at the alarm clock by her bed and swore _"Ashley it's not even 2 yet of course you woke me"_

Isabella was a drummer for a not well known rock band so her days were spent sleeping and her nights were spent partying. Ashley had been know to join her once in a great while but she spent most of her time with Randy and John or with her dad so she hadn't seen Isabella in quite a while.

"You going the next two weeks?" Ashley asked.

"_No the band is flying over to the UK for a few gigs" _

"Well leave the key under the loose brick in the path leading to the front door because Kyle is doing something with two of our spare rooms"

"_Whatever I'm going back to sleep"_

:"Good night Isa" Ashley said hanging up.

"Well now that everything is all set at my house we can go pick out stuff for the boys" Ashley said rubbing her hands together in anticipation.

"Oh great" both guys said at the same time.

"Fun times ... fun times"


	4. Chapter 4

Title: Ride Of Your Life

Author: Adrian Jade

Summary: One day you wake up and realize that everything you thought mattered to you doesn't. John Cena has a girlfriend who he thinks he loves and a best friend who he knows he will always love. What happens when on a random pit stop to a Walmart they find something that could change all of their lives. John needs to choose where his heart belongs.

Disclaimer: I own all the people that you don't recognize. Everyone else own themselves and their characters belong to the WWE.

"Ok John put the bags on the couch for now" Ashley told him once they had gotten to their hotel after an exhausting 3 hour shopping spree.

John put the bags on the couch and collapsed next to them. Randy walked in carrying a sleeping Dean.

"Where should I put him?" Randy asked.

"Bedroom genius" Ashley replied.

"John can you move for 2 seconds so I can change Phinnigan's diaper?" Ashley asked.

John removed himself from the couch with great effort.

"If you need me I'll be napping with Dean" John said heading towards the bedroom.

"Your daddy is a weirdo" she said to the baby "you know what let's forget the diaper change and we'll give you a nice warm bath instead"

Randy came out of the bedroom and had a seat in a near by chair.

"Rans can you do me a favor and open the box with Phinnigan's bath tub so I can give him a bath and put a new out fit on him?" Ashley asked.

"Yeah sure whatever just as long as you never make me go shopping with you again" he said starting to rummage through the numerous bags that were lying all over the living room.

"It wasn't that bad" Ashley said beginning to undress the baby.

"Found it what do you want me to do with it?" he asked.

"Bring it into the bathroom and fill it with warm water then just put it on the kitchen table" she told him.

Randy did as he was told and brought the tub filled with warm water to the table. Phinnigan began to cry a little when Ashley undressed him. But she wasn't too worried because all newborns hated being naked because they were cold. She held the outfit he had on in her hands with a face filled with disgust.

"Dean probably wore this thing" she gaged a little "we'll burn it later"

Randy just laughed at her and watched as she picked the crying infant up and rocked him a little as she walked over to the table.

"Shh, it's ok baby" she comforted him before gently placing him in the warm water.

"See sweetie this isn't so bad" she said wishing his little body with a cloth. He stopped crying when he felt the water on his body.

"He likes it" Randy observed.

"And people call you an idiot" Ashley replied.

"Who the hell calls me an idiot?" he asked.

"Me" she stuck her tongue out at him.

"You ... having a baby it just seems so natural" Randy commented.

"Must be because I am a woman right" Ashley said flatly.

"No, not like that ... what I mean to say is that you seem very at ease with him" Randy corrected himself.

"I used to work at a daycare while still in high school" she explained "I know how to feed a baby, change it's diaper and give it the Heimlich if need be".

"Ok I guess that explains a lot" he said "so what do you think Kelly is going to say?"

Ashley didn't answer Randy's question right away instead she busied herself with washing the little hair that Phinnigan did have with baby shampoo. One she had rinsed his hair and wrapped the baby in a towel and sat back down on the couch to dress him did she reply.

"I couldn't give two shits about what she is going to say just because she is in John's life does not mean that she has to go anywhere near my son"

"But he is John's son too" Randy pointed out.

"He is only John's son because I wanted him to be but we all know who is actually going to be raising this kid and I accept that, John has his own thing going on and that's ok, I didn't really expect him to agree to adopting Phinnigan with me but he did so Phin is his son too"

"So you don't want John in Phinnigan's life?" Randy asked having a seat in a chair near Ashley and the baby.

"Of course I do John is my best friend and I trust him with both mine and Phinnigan's life but that doesn't mean I want that gold digging bitch near my baby"

"Can you grab me a diaper?" she asked Randy gesturing to the package of diapers on the other side of the room. Randy stood up from his chair and grabbed a diaper. He cringed as he handed it to her because he knew that later on someone would have to change the diaper.

"I'm glad my kid is already potty trained" he smirked a little to himself.

Ashley just couldn't let him have his little victory "Sorry to burst your bubble big guy but Dean isn't completely potty trained he still has to wear Pull Ups to bed" she said "and you wanted to adopt him so that means you have to change the pissy Pull Ups which are no better than diapers"

"Do you have to be so vulgar" Randy remarked.

"Randy I have thought worse, done worse, and said worse"

"Yeah I know you have spent way too much time with John" Randy rolled his eyes "but you need to cut down on the swearing because there are little ears around now"

"Randy ... fuck you"

Randy gave her a funny look. She just cracked him a smile.

"I needed to get it out of my system" she said as she finished putting Phinnigan into a pair of nice clean new pajamas.

"Ok I changed and bathed the little guy and he doesn't need another bottle for another 2 hours what shall we do with our spare time?"

"We could always watch TV" Randy suggested.

"How about a movie instead"

"Ok, which one?" Randy asked.

Ashley handed Phinnigan to Randy and got up and ran over to her carry on and began rummaging through it.

"I know I packed it in here somewhere ... no that's not it ... hey I've been looking for my light green thong for like 3 days and now I've found it" Randy's left eyebrow shot up a bit at that statement "SCORE ! I found it!"

"UGH! Ashley why do we have to watch The Boondock Saints again?" Randy whined a little. Ashley had already made him and John watch that movie over 300 times.

"Because I love it" she insisted popping the DVD into the DVD player that was connected to the TV.

Ashley had a seat next to Randy and the movie started.

"Did you know that they had to shoot the beginning scene in a Protestant church because no Catholic one would let them film it there because of the plot"

"Yes you've only told me every time we watch the stupid movie" Randy replied.

Ashley gasped "This is not a stupid movie!"

"It is when you have seen it 3000 times"

"This has to be one of the greatest movies of all times" Ashley said.

"You only like it because the two main characters are Irish" Randy said.

"God damn right they are Irish ... fighting for the rights of the little man"

After that Ashley didn't say another word she just sat there humming the song that played in the beginning of the movie. It fascinated Randy to no end to see how Ashley could get so into a movie she had seen so many times before but she somehow always managed to do it. About an hour into the movie John woke up from his nap and decided to join them in the living room.

"Cool watching The Boondock Saints" he said having a seat next to Ashley.

"Daddy I'm hungry" Dean said walking into the room rubbing his eyes.

"What do you want to eat?" Randy asked relieved he had something to do besides watch the movie with the two other idiots he was friends with.

"Peanut butter and jelly sandwich" he said.

"Ok let me call room service" he said.

Randy got up to use the phone and Dean took his seat his attention turning to the movie. Neither John or Ashley noticed him or they would have shut the movie off because it certainly wasn't a movie Dean should have been watching because every other word out of the characters mouths was fuck.

"Auntie whats does fuck mean?" Dean asked.

Ashley's head snapped towards the direction of Dean's voice. It was the first time that she noticed that he was awake. She quickly made a grab for the remote control and shut the movie off.

"Umm ... Dean honey fuck is a bad word that little boys and girls shouldn't say because it gets them in trouble" Ashley said.

"But they guys said fuck a lot on the TV" Dean pointed out.

Randy heard Dean say that.

"Nice going Ash teaching my kid the F word" he shot her a glare.

"He would have learned it eventually seeing as it's John's favorite word" Ashley replied "and it's not like I sat him down and taught him how to say it I didn't notice he was in the room till he asked me what the F word meant"

"Dean you aren't allowed to say that word ok" Randy said kneeling down to Dean's level "that is a very bad word and only bad people use that word"

"What about Uncle John it's his favorite word"

"Well honey Uncle John is an idiot" Ashley said.

John shot Ashley a look but she pretended not to notice.

"Your dad is right Dean fuck is a bad word and I'm not going to say it anymore" John said.

"Pinky promise" Dean said holding out his pinky.

"Pinky promise" John said having no idea what Dean wanted him to do.

"No Uncle John you are supposed to go like this" Dean said taking John's pinky and linking it with his own and shaking it.

Ashley and Randy chuckled at John's expense. Even John had to laugh, Dean was too cute not to. The little boy with the dark brown hair and hazel eyes had quickly made an impression on all of them.

"So Dean tomorrow you get to meet all the guys Daddy and Uncle John work with are you excited"

"Do I get to meet Batista and The Undertaker?" Dean asked excitedly.

"Yeah because tomorrow is a cross brand super show" Ashley explained.

"Cool they are my two favorites!" Dean explained jumping up and down.

"Oh that is a diss ya boy likes Dave and Mark better than you" Ashley laughed to herself.

"Oh grow up"

"Randal Keith"

"Ashley Fiona"

"Yeah well my dad is a better wrestler than yours" Ashley said sticking out her tongue.

"You two are more like children that the actual children" John said.

"Phin is asleep ... John I command you to set up his playpen" Ashley waved her hand in a manner that told him to move.

"Oh yeah let me hop right to that" John said sarcastically.

"I have been taking care of YOUR son since you decided to take a nap so the least you can do is set the the stupid thing up"

John sighed "Fine"

He set the play pen up and took the baby from Ashley and put him in it. A knock on the door caught Dean's attention.

"I'll get it" he said excitedly running to the door.

"No you won't" Randy said coming to stand next to him.

"Who it is daddy?" Dean asked.

"I don't know yet" Randy said looking through the peephole.

"Oh shit" he said "umm ... guys I have good news and bad news"

"What is it?" Ashley asked.

"The good news is Dean's sandwich is here but the bad news is so is Kelly who is holding said sandwich"

"Mother fu...dger" John said "we need to hide the kids and all this stuff"

"Why?" Ashley asked.

"Because I think Kelly deserves to have me sit down and explain the situation to her" John said.

Kelly knocked again but this time much louder. Ashley looked over into the playpen to see Phinnigan was still sleeping.

"If she wakes him up I'll kill that bitch myself"

"Go" John whispered furiously.

"Fine ... Randy grab Phinnigan's playpen and I'll get the bags and we'll hang out in the bedroom"

"But what about my sandwich" Dean whined.

"You can eat it in the bedroom" Ashley told him as she grabbed some of the bags. John carried the rest of the bags and hurried Ashley and Dean into the other room. Randy carefully picked up the playpen up and brought it into the other room.

"Randy ... dumbass when I said take the playpen into the bedroom I meant for you to take the baby out first" Ashley smacked him upside his head.

"Well he's fine and still sleeping so relax" Randy said rubbing the spot where she hit him.

"Dean we need to be quiet because Uncle John has to talk to a mean lady who doesn't like kids and if she hears you she will want to kill you" Ashley warned Dean.

Dean got a scared look on his face.

"Ashley" was all John needed to say for Ashley to know she was in trouble.

John jogged out of the room and answered the door. He smiled at Kelly hoping she wouldn't sense anything was different.

"What took you so long to answer the door?" she asked.

"I ... I was in the shower so I had to throw some clothes on" he lied.

"Did you order a peanut butter and jelly sandwich?" Kelly asked.

"No that's Randy's, he and Ashley are watching Newlyweds in the other room"

"Oh ok maybe I should go say hi" Kelly said taking a step towards the bedroom door.

"No" John yelled "they are ... sick it's really bad in there so let me just bring this to Randy and then we can talk" he said taking the sandwich from her.

He walked back into the bedroom to find Ashley, Randy and Dean all laying on the bed watching Spongebob Squarepants.

"Here you go Dean" John said giving the sandwich to Dean "remember quiet"

Dean took the sandwich from John and practically shoved the whole thing into his mouth. Ashley watched him and rolled her eyes.

"Dean take small bites because you are gonna choke"

John left before he could hear Dean's answer. John found Kate sitting on the couch looking at something.

"John what's this?" she asked holding the outfit Phinnigan had been wearing earlier that day.

"It looks like baby clothes" John replied.

"Yeah I know that I mean what is it doing here?" she asked.

"Well ... umm ... I kinda have a baby" he said.

"I'm sorry I must have heard you wrong" Kelly said "I thought you said you kinda have a baby"

"I did" he said looking at his shoes.

"How do kinda have a baby?" she asked.

"Because Ashley and I kinda adopted a the baby boy we found" John admitted.

"YOU ADOPTED A BABY WITH HER!" Kelly yelled.

Of course Kelly's outburst woke up Phinnigan who started to scream bloody murder because apparently he didn't like being woken up. Ashley picked the baby up and tried to talk him around hoping that he would go back to sleep but he continued to cry.

"Let's go for a walk" Ashley suggested to Randy.

"Ok just let me change Dean's clothes because it is a little too cold to wear a t-shirt and jeans" Randy said.

"Where we goin daddy?" Dean asked.

"For a walk Little guy so let's put on some of your new clothes and your new $120 sneakers that you will out grow in like 2 months" Randy said more for Ashley than for Dean because she was the one who bought them.

"Were you knot the one who mentioned that we are not anywhere near broke"

Randy just shook his head as he picked out a pair of jeans and a long sleeved camouflage shirt for Dean to put on. While Randy was dressing Dean, Ashley took Phinnigan's carriage out of the box and managed to assemble it all by herself ... she felt really proud. She picked the baby up from his spot where he had been lying on the bed and put him into his carriage. He was still crying a little and Ashley swore if she got Kelly alone she would personally strangle her.

"Nice going whore" Ashley said walking into the room with the crying baby in the carriage.

Dean came running out of the room and hid behind Ashley's leg.

"Who the hell is he?" Kelly asked in a tone that sported shock and annoyance.

"His name is Dean he's Randy's son" John replied.

"Auntie I don't want her to kill me" Dean said scared.

"Why does he think I am going to kill him" Kelly asked putting her hands on her hips. Her dark brown eyes clashing with Ashley's grey ones. Kelly was about 3 inches shorter than Ashley and not as well built so it was easy to see who would win in a fight.

"You know what Kelly I have no idea" Ashley mocked innocence.

"You bi..." Kelly started but was interrupted by Ashley.

"Kelly little children in the room" Ashley reminded her sweetly.

"All ready to go" Randy said.

"Daddy hold me" Dean said holding out his arms.

Randy picked him up and with the other hand he started to push the carriage out of the hotel room.

"Now Kelly try not to miss me" Ashley said shutting the door before Kelly could reply.

"God I hate her!" Kelly fumed "why does she always have to be around?"

"Because Ashley is my best friend and I trust her more than anyone else" John said.

"More than me?" Kelly asked pouting.

"Ashley won't break my heart" John said.

"But she did once right I mean that is why you two aren't together anymore right?" Kelly asked.

John flexed his jaw muscle, he clenched and unclenched his fists. His past with Ashley he didn't like to talk about it because it still ran raw with him and Kelly knew that.

"I don't want to talk about it" he said annoyed.

"Fine ... whatever no need to bite my head off" Kelly said "but why did you have to adopt a baby with her of all people?"

"Ash can't have kids and I know how much it means to her to have a family and I would help her in any way I can because she's important to me" he replied honestly. He did not hide the fact that Ashley was important to him and Kelly had known that when they started dating but sometimes she wondered who was more important to him.

"So the dumb bitch is can't have kids" Kelly said smirking.

"Kelly that ain't funny Ash can't have children because she was beat repeatedly as a teenager"

"Chris beat her?" Kelly asked shocked.

"Of course not, Chris would rather die than see his kids hurt. After Ash's mom died her dad couldn't take the pain of looking at Ashley or her two younger brothers so he put them in a group home and apparently they beat her so bad that she can't conceive children of her own"

"That is so sad" Kelly said actually feeling bad for Ashley "that is something I don't even wish for my worst enemy"

"I think Ashley and Phinnigan need each other" John said.

"She named him Phinnigan?" Kelly asked with a hint of disgust.

"It was her grandfather's name and believe me it grows on you" John said.

"So do you consider him your son?" Kelly asked.

"Yes"

"So if we had kids would you tell them he was their brother?"

"Hold on who said anything about kids" John said.

"Oh so you will share a son with Ashley but you don't want kids with me you know what that is fucked up John" she said starting to get upset.

"I never said that you just threw me for a loop when you mentioned kids that we don't have but yes if we did have children Phinnigan would be considered their brother" John stated.

"Great ... just great" Kelly mumbled to herself "now not only do I have to deal with the bitch now I have her brat to deal with too, sometimes I wonder if John is really worth it"

Now with this baby in the picture she would need to try harder to make herself look better than Ashley in John's eyes if that was even possible.


	5. Chapter 5

Title: Ride Of Your Life

Author: Adrian Jade

Summary: One day you wake up and realize that everything you thought mattered to you doesn't. John Cena has a girlfriend who he thinks he loves and a best friend who he knows he will always love. What happens when on a random pit stop to a Walmart they find something that could change all of their lives. John needs to choose where his heart belongs.

Disclaimer: I own all the people that you don't recognize. Everyone else own themselves and their characters belong to the WWE.

Ashley pushed Phinnigan's stroller through the back entrance of the Air Canada Center. She looked at the sleeping baby and couldn't help but smile. Randy followed her carrying his sleeping son and finally John and Kelly lagged behind walking leisurely while holding each other's hand. Ashley wanted to vomit at the sickening sight.

"Hey guys I'll meet up with you later I'm going to go see my dad" Ashley said.

"You taking Phinnigan with you?" John asked.

"Yeah better to tell dad now rather than having him find out on his own later" she replied.

"Hey Ashley if you want ... later on maybe we could go shopping or something" Kelly suggested.

"Umm ... yeah sure" Ashley said scratching the back of her head.

"Ash I'll walk with ya and you can help me figure out what to tell my parents" Randy said shifting Dean a little on his shoulder. They began to walk away from John and Kelly.

"You are just on a role" Ashley said "getting busted for smoking weed backstage at a Smackdown event, getting 60 days suspension and having to spend 4 weeks in anger management ... now you adopting a kids you really are on a frickin role"

"Well at least I wasn't addicted to Vicatin for a year ... and who was it who stole $ 7,000 from their father to feed their habit until their father literally threw them into rehab"

"Could you say it any louder I don't think the whole backstage area heard you" Ashley snapped irritably.

"Well don't play the 'who screwed up more' game with me because you loose every time"

"Why the hell is Kelly being nice to me because it is freaking me out?" Ashley asked.

"Yeah ... I have no idea" Randy said "is it cold in here cause hell just froze over big time"

"Yeah no kiddin"

"Ashley" both Randy and Ashley turned around when they heard Stephanie McMahon-Levesque's voice coming from behind them.

"What's up Steph?" Ashley asked her good friend and boss.

"Creative staff meeting in an hour" Steph announced.

"Can you watch Phin?" Ashley asked Randy.

"He has a daddy leave him with John" Randy said.

"I'll remember that when you need me to watch Dean" Ashley remarked.

"Ok I'm confused" Stephanie said.

"Ashley and John adopted a baby boy" Randy announced.

"Ok even more confused isn't John dating my pain in the ass cousin?" Stephanie asked. She liked Kelly about as much as Ashley did.

"Basically what it comes down to is I can't have children but wanted one so I convinced John to pretend to be my fiancée so that it would look better having two parents instead of one but apparently they will let anyone adopt because Randy has a son now" Ashley explained.

"Umm ... yeah" Steph replied stepping closer to the stroller to get a better look at the baby.

"He's beautiful Ash congratulations maybe now John will come to his senses and dump Kelly and finally get with you"

"Steph you have a better chance of a house falling on Kelly" Ashley said looking up to the Heavens hopefully "... me and John just don't make a good couple"

"You and John are a couple in every way except for the actual sex part" Steph said.

"She has a point Ash" Randy took it upon himself to enter the conversation.

"Don't you have a phone call to make" Ashley commented.

"Don't be bitter because we are right" Randy said.

"What are you two smoking because I want some ... me and John are just friends we tried the whole dating thing and it didn't work"

"When did you and John date?" Stephanie asked.

"While Ashley was still in collage and John was working at a gym in California" Randy filled Stephanie in.

"Well I'm going to leave you two ladies to gossip because I have to go find my dad" Ashley said.

"You mind taking Dean with ya?" Randy asked "just in case my parents start yelling I don't want to worry him"

"Sure hand him over" Ashley said.

Randy passed Dean to her and she steadied herself so she could push the stroller with one hand and support the sleeping little boy with the other. Ashley wanted to chuckle to herself ... what a sight she must have been to her fellow co-workers. She found her father's locker room and opened up the door. Chris Benoit was on the phone when his daughter walked into his locker room, he looked at her strangely as she gently placed a sleeping little boy on his couch before moving towards the stroller that she had pushed into the room. She removed a little baby boy and took the hat he was wearing off before having a seat with him on the other end of the couch.

"Dean ... I'll call you back" Chris said snapping his phone shut.

"Care to explain this" he gestured from Dean to Phinnigan.

"Dad I'd like you to meet your grandson Phinnigan William Joshua Cena"

"How do I have a grandson with the last name Cena and why do I have a feeling that I will want to kill John ... he didn't get some poor girl pregnant and she didn't want the baby so she gave it to him but he wanted nothing to do with it so he handed the baby off to you did he because I'll slam that god damn idiot's head into a wall"

"No dad John and I adopted a baby" Ashley said rationally.

"I'm sorry you and John did what?" Chris asked not really sure that he had heard Ashley right the first time.

"We adopted a baby" Ashley repeated.

"WHO THE HELL WOULD GIVE YOU TWO A BABY!" Chris yelled.

Dean woke up with a start and began crying. Phinnigan began to cry as well.

"It's ok Dean the mean old man didn't mean to scare you" Ashley said taking Dean into the lap as she tried to calm both him and Phinnigan down. She glared at Chris. Finally when both boys were asleep she laid Dean back down and returned Phinnigan to his stroller.

"Who's the boy?" Chris asked.

"Randy's son Dean" Ashley answered taking bottle supplies out of Phinnigan's diaper bag.

"Man they will give a kid to anyone won't they" Chris remarked.

"I said the same exact thing" Ashley said.

"So where did this sudden need to have a baby come about?" Chris asked.

"We found Phinnigan in a parking lot, someone left him there to die and then I found out that they were putting him in an orphanage and I guess I just felt like he needed to be with me ... nobody should have to go through what I went through"

A saddened look crossed Chris's features. Ashley slipped up and regretted it the moment she finished her sentence. For a minute she had forgotten who she was talking to. She knew Chris felt guilty for leaving his children at that place and they all had forgiven him completely.

"Dad I'm sorry I didn't mean to mention that place"

"It's ok and I regret everyday that I left you and your brothers at that horrible home I have no idea what I was thinking"

"You weren't in the right mind dad ... me and Connor and Keegan we know that"

"I was wrong for leaving you and your brothers in that place and if you felt that because of that you needed to adopt a baby although I find it a little sudden I will support you because I love you and I know that you have some comprehension of what you are doing"

"Your faith in me is astounding" she rolled her eyes.

"Watch it because you are not to old for me to ground you"

"Oh yes ground me to my hotel room with the room service, Pay Per View cable, and my PS2 ... yeah that is real punishment"

He playfully grabbed Ashley's ear, not hard enough to cause actual pain but hard enough to be uncomfortable.

"Let go of my ear" Ashley said.

"Are you going to be nice"

"Christopher Michael Benoit let go of my ear now" Ashley commanded.

"Ashley Fiona Benoit try being respectful of your father"

Ashley threw her elbow up and it almost connected with Chris's jaw if he hadn't moved away just in time.

"Hey you almost took off my head!"

"Got you to let go of my ear didn't it" Ashley smirked triumphantly.

"Auntie" Dean said rubbing his eyes.

"What's up sweetie?" Ashley asked.

"I gotta go potty" Dean said.

"Ok come on I'll take you" Ashley picked Dean up and carried him into the bathroom.

Chris looked at the baby that his daughter and her best friend adopted. He was so small but Chris could sense a strength about him. Phinnigan looked so peaceful sleeping but then again most babies did. His skin was a pale pink color and Chris could see a hint of light brown hair. Just by looking at him he knew this cute was going to be handsome when he got older. He just hoped that the kid didn't need shock therapy before he turned 5 because growing up with Ashley and John as his parents was going to be an adventure ... he just hoped that Phinnigan didn't end up living with him because his mother was in jail for killing his father's current girlfriend but he didn't put that one past Ashley.

Dean came running out of the bathroom and stopped short. Ashley almost collided with him.

"I know who you are ... you're Chris Benoit"

"Dean this is my dad" Ashley said.

"Your dad is Chris Benoit ... wow if Jimmy and Greg could see me now" Dean grinned brightly.

"I have a creative meeting in a little bit can you keep an eye on these two for a little while?"

"It's been a long time since I've been around young children" Chris pointed out "are you sure you you want to leave them with me"

"I trust you and besides if you have trouble Randy and John are down the hall but go to Randy first because I'd rather not have Kelly anywhere near Phinnigan"

"Auntie where is daddy?" Dean asked.

"He'll be down to pick you up in a little while honey" she said having a seat next to him on the couch "you are going to stay here with my dad till then and I know you will behave"

Ashley gently placed a hand on the back of Dean's head as she began "helping" him nod his head.

"Yes Auntie whatever you say goes" she said.

Dean giggled "Yes Auntie whatever you say goes"

"I'm going to feed Phin and then I'm off to save people from evil doers" she placed her hands on her hips and tried her best to look like Superman.

"Remind me why people gave you a baby again" Ashley stuck out her tongue at her father but she knew he was just kidding around with her. Ashley fed the baby and left. Chris was holding Phinnigan while Dean was sprawled out on the floor coloring.

"Chris I'm bored"

"What do you want to do?" Chris asked the young boy.

"I wanna meet wrestlers ... can you take me to meet The Undertaker and Batista ... they are my favorites" Dean began jumping up and down.

"I guess we can do that but you have to hold my hand the entire time ok"

"Yay!" Dean exclaimed.

Chris put Phinnigan into his carriage and took Dean's small hand in his own as he tried to navigate the halls using only one hand to steer the carriage.

"Who am I gonna meet first?" Dean asked.

"We'll try catering first most of the wrestlers hand out there"

"Cool ... I wanna meet The Undertaker and Batista and DX and Ken Kennedy and The Hardy Boyz and Kane and Chavo Guerrero so I can tell him that he is being mean to Rey Mysterio ... oooh I wanna meet him too and I wanna meet Chris Masters and Mr. McMahon ..." Dean continued to ramble on while Chris attempted to keep up with what he was saying but it was impossible because he was talking way too fast.

"Dean take a breath" Chris told him.

"Are we there yet?" Dean asked.

Chris gritted his teeth it had been so long since he had had a little child around he had forgotten how annoying they were.

"No Dean it'll still be a couple of minutes"

"My legs are starting to hurt" Dean whined.

_'I'm going to kill this kid'_ Chris thought as he picked the small boy up.

They finally reached catering and much to Chris's annoyance nobody was there.

"I hate children" Chris mumbled to himself.

Chris brought both boys back to his locker room. Dean stood there with his arms crossed.

"We didn't get to see anyone ... I wanna meet Batista and The Undertaker" Dean stamped his foot on the ground.

Chris's hard blue eyes met Dean's brown ones. He understood that Dean had spent most of his short life in an orphanage that didn't have the funds or the time to attend to all of Dean's needs and now that he was getting anything he wanted when he wanted it of course it would only be natural for him to test his new found boundaries. But it was still really annoying and Chris could only take so much of it.

Dean began rubbing his eyes and Chris knew what was going to happen next. He also began to sniffle.

"Oh hell no don't even think about starting the fake crying this because I raised 3 kids ... it doesn't work on me"

Dean's eyes got as wide as silver dollars and he stopped sniffling and stood there barely breathing. Chris just shook his head.

"You would think I was about to hit you or something" Chris said cracking a smile "give me about 10 minutes and then we'll go find Batista and The Undertaker ok"

2 Hours Later ...

"Steph that had to be the most boring meeting I have ever had to sit through" Ashley said "no offense I thought it was never gonna end"

"We had some important issues to discuss" Stephanie said seriously, but both Stephanie and Ashley burst into hysterical laughter.

"Hey girls" Kelly said cheerfully walking towards Stephanie and Ashley "what's so funny?"

"Nothing really we were just being weirdos" Stephanie replied.

"So Ashley I was thinking we could go shopping or maybe go to a spa or something like that" Kelly said excitedly.

"Ummm ... shopping is ok I guess" Ashley said.

"Stephanie would you like to join us?" Kelly asked.

"I'd love to but I promised I'd relieve Paul from his baby sitting duty after the meeting so another time" Stephanie said.

"Ok then let me just grab my purse and we'll leave" Kelly said before leaving to get her purse.

"Please don't leave me alone with her" Ashley begged.

"You'll be fine" Stephanie said "and who knows maybe you'll actually become friends"

"Yeah and maybe it'll rain blood in Germany ... ain't likely to happen"

"Have fun" Stephanie said beginning to walk away.

"I hate you" Ashley yelled.

"I know you do"

"Ready?" Kelly asked putting a hand on Ashley's shoulder.

"Yeah" Ashley shrugged her hand away and began walking.

"So if you don't mind me asking why did you and John break up ... I've tried asking him but he doesn't like talking about it?" Kelly asked carefully.

Ashley opened her mouth to say something and Kelly thought she was going to yell at her but Ashley closed her mouth and sat there thinking. She closed her eyes and rested her head against the seat.

"John and I were two young people who were so caught up in ourselves that we couldn't really make a relationship work so I ended it before we ended up hating each other forever" Ashley replied honestly.

"So do you love him?" she asked.

"I believe what you want to know is if I am in love with him and the answer is no I'm not ... I love John but not in the way you think I do, he's my best friend and the first guy that I ever really fell in love with but times change I don't feel that way about John anymore so you have nothing to worry about" Ashley said with her eyes still closed.

"I wish I could believe you" Kelly mumbled to herself.

Later that day ...

Ashley wouldn't admit this to anyone but she was actually having a fun time with Kelly/ It hadn't been easy at first but once Kelly had explained that she didn't want to fight with Ashley anymore did Ashley put her guards down just a little. She still didn't trust Kelly completely but she was willing to try if Kelly was willing to meet her halfway. The drive home was a pleasant one both women sat chatting away as if they had been friends for years ... they shared stories they had about John doing stupid things and laughed at his expense. Kelly parked the car and both women got out and went to the trunk to collect their bags.

"You know I had fun today" Kelly said earnestly.

"Yeah me too"

"When John first told me about the baby I was really pissed but then when he told me that you couldn't have any kids on your own and about how you were abused as a teen I began to feel bad so I thought maybe she could use a friend to talk to"

Ashley's normally light grey eyes darkened as the rage set in. Although she looked calm on the outside internally she was anything but. She couldn't believe that John had betrayed her like that, she had entrusted him with a secret that she hadn't told anyone else and he turned around and told the one person who Ashley detested the most.

"I have to go" Ashley said running as fast as she could into the building.

She kept running till she couldn't run anymore and collapsed in a dark corner of an abandoned hallway. She brought her knees up to her chest and cried until she couldn't cry anymore. Then she just sat there and thought about things but eventually she began to cry again. She couldn't believe John had betrayed her after everything they had been through.

John just happened to be walking by when he heard someone crying. He was about to continue walking when he thought he recognized the sound of the sobs. He kept walking closer till he found Ashley sitting with her head down crying.

"Oh my god Ash what happened" John asked crounching down next to her.

At the sound of John's voice the tears stopped, Ashley literally felt her heart hardening. She looked into John's eyes, she could see the concern that he had for her. He went to hug her but she pushed him away and stood up. He stood up as well, before he even had a chance to get any words out Ashley punched him hard in the face. He swore he could taste blood.

"What the hell was that for?" he asked shocked that she had punched him.

"We are through John I never want to talk to you again ... I can't believe you ... I told you something that I have never told anyone and you go around and tell Kelly" she screamed at him.

He stood there rubbing his jaw but he didn't even bother denying it because that would only infuriate Ashley even more.

"I'm sorry" he finally said.

"Sorry doesn't cut it John from now on I want you to stay away from me and my son" Ashley walked pushed past him.

"Come on Ash don't be like that" John called after her but she was to angry to even hear him.

"Damn it" John yelled before punching the wall next to him.

He was too heart broken to even realize that he had just broken 3 bones in his fist. Ashley grabbed Phinnigan and left the arena. It would be a long journey back to her home in Greenwood, Connecticut but it would give her a lot of time to think about what happens next.


	6. Chapter 6

Ashley sighed as she pulled into her driveway. She grabbed Phinnigan's carrier and began walking towards the lavender with black trim colonial, that she and Isabella called home. She can hear Isabella playing the drums in the foyer of their home and curses to herself seeing as Phinnigan is sleeping and she doubted she could walk through the foyer with Isabella playing the drums and not have the baby wake up. She stepped onto the porch and began ringing the doorbell hoping that Isabella would stop playing long enough for Ashley to get the baby inside and up to her room which she thanked god was on the third floor of the house ... well away from all the noise.

"IT'S OPEN" Isabella yelled.

Ashley walks into the house and yells shut up as loud as she possibly can. Isabella stops drumming mid beat and begins staring at her friend.

"What's with the carrier?" Isa asks.

"This is your new housemate Phinnigan"

"You're kidding ..."

"Nope this is my son" she looked at the little boy sleeping peacefully in his camouflage carrier "so get used to having him around"

"Wait a minute Ash this isn't like bringing home a puppy or a kitten that you found wandering the streets ... this is a living breathing human being ... an infant no less"

"Well get over it because he isn't going anywhere" Ashley said starting to get defensive.

"Do you even realize what infants turn into ... Children!" Ashley chuckled a little, the way Isabella said children reminded Ashley of Captain Jack Sparrow from the Pirates of the Caribbean movies.

"Not all kids are evil Isa" Ashley said heading towards the stairs that led to her bedroom.

"Sure you say that now but wait a few years till he starts talking back and disrespecting people" Isa yelled to Ashley.

"He won't"Ashley yelled back before entering her room.

She locked the door behind her before moving towards her bed. She placed Phinnigan's carrier on the floor and unbuckled the baby and lifted him out of his seat.

""Phinny what do you say you and me take a nap and we'll deal with everything thing else when we wake up ... good I'm glad you agree" she said to the still sleeping baby.

She carefully laid down with Phinnigan sleeping on her chest. She sighed once she was comfortable, it was good to be home but it was upsetting the way she ended up here. She closed her eyes and tried her best to go to sleep. After about 3 hours of just lyong in bed staring at the ceiling she carefully removed Phinnigan from her chest and laid him down next to her before getting up. After placing pillows around him to make sure he didn't roll off the bed she dug through the numerous bags of baby thing before she found the baby monitor she was looking for. She set it up and hooked the handset to her back pocket before leaving the room.

"John has called every 10 minutes for the last 3 hours" Isabella said as Ashley entered the living room.

"Whatever" Ashley said heading towards the kitchen "I want nothing to do with him".

"What happened?" Isabella asked following her.

"Why is it that we never have any food in this house?" Ashley asked rummaging through the fridge, she was trying to change the subject but Isabella wasn't about to let her.

"Hey, talk to me,why aren't you speaking to John?" Isabella urged Ashley to speak.

"I told him about being beaten when I was younger and he went and told Kelly about it" Ashley fumed. She was finally letting all the rage she had for John out, but after a few seconds everything turned to tears. Isabella went to Ashley and took her in her arms and hugged Ashley as she cried.

"I'm so sorry Ash" Isabella said rubbing Ashley's back.

"I feel so betrayed" Ashley said when she was finally calmed down enough to speak.

"Maybe it was an accident" Isabella reasoned "John loves you and I doubt he would do anything to hurt you like that"

"Well he did and now I can never trust him again"

"Don't you think you are being a little over dramatic?" Isa asked.

Ashley pulled away from Isabella, her eyes glazed over with anger. Isa had mispoken and now she was going to get an earful that truly belonged to John. She mentally noted to herself to call John and "thank" him.

"Being over dramatic ... you have no idea what I went through in that place ... you just remember visiting me in the hospital, I know you do ... those people took away my chance to ever have a normal life but I'm being over dramatic ... maybe I should call them up and thank them!" Ashley exclaimed.

"Now you are being nasty and you know I don't take that crap from anyone so curb your attitude" Isa warned her.

"This is my life Isa ... I won't be able to hold Phinnigan in a few months because he will be too damn heavy and my arms will give out but that's ok right ... I mean I'm just being over dramatic"

Isabella had enough of Ashley yelling at her. She grabbed some of the material from Ashley's shirt and pushed her back against the fridge and pinned her there.

"Do you know how many times I wished it was me instead of you because I know it kills you to see what you can't have but you need to stop this pity party because it is getting annoying ... so what if John told Kelly about your secret, she'll probably tell everyone in the WWE locker room but what harm is it really going to do to you ... when it comes down to it everyone likes you better than Kelly anyways so they will think Kelly is a bitch but in the end you come out on top so just relax and as for John he probably feels like a total asshole right now and is liable to do something stupid because you aren't around and as for you not having a normal life it seems pretty good to me ... you have got a fantastic family who supports you in everything you do ... you have a fucking degree in political science from UCONN and you have friends that would kill for you and not to mention a beautiful adopted son sleeping upstairs so look at all you have and really think about it" Isa let go of Ashley's shirt and watched as she walked away.

"Either her or that idiot John are going to be the death of me" Isa said shaking her head. Although she hated being the one to use "tough love" on Ashley, Isa felt she needed to because she needed Ashley to know how good she had it.

Ashley decided to vent her frustration in the game room over a game of pool. Ashley always loved pool because the only thinking you had to do while playing it was how to get the ball into the pocket. She chalked up her pool stick and set the balls up. Next she popped her Bryan Adams cd into the cd player and put When You're Gone on repeat. She blared the music to spite Isa.

Isabella was the first one to hear Phinnigan start to cry.

"Ima kill her" Isabella's thick Bostonian accent shown through as she went to go get the crying baby.

It was dark when Ashley finally left the game room. She yawned and stretched her tired muscles. All the lights in the house were off so Ashley carefully made it to her bedroom. There was a little night light on in the room and Ashley could see that Isabella had put Phinnigan's porter crib together. She crept over to the porter crib to check on the baby. He was sleeping soundly, Ashley knew she owed Isa big time but at the present moment she really didn't care. Ashley quickly got undressed and put on a pair of boxers and a t-shirt before getting into bed. She was only asleep for about a half hour when she heard the door to her room open a little. Ashley propped herself up a little to see who had entered her room. All she could see was the person's back. She was too tired to care. She was dozing off again when she felt a pair of arms wrap around her torso. She was so tired that she didn't even feel the person climb into bed with her. She jumped a little in suprise when John snaked his arms around her waist.

"Ash you awake?" John asked.

"I am now" Ashley said annoyed, she was fully awake now.

"Please don't be mad at me I never meant to hurt you" Ashley could hear the sadness in his voice.

Ashley didn't say anything but she didn't move out of John's grip either. John noted her silence but he was relieved that she didn't pull away from him either.

"I love you Ashley and I would rather cause myself pain then see you or Phinnigan hurt" John said earnestly.

"What happened to your hand?" Ashley asked gingerly running the tips of her fingers over the bandages that covered John's hand.

"I broke a few bones nothing new" John replied.

Neither person knew what to say to make this situation any easier so they both gave up talking. It wasn't long before Ashley heard John softly snoring. She shifted her head a little to look at him. Even though she was still furious with him she could never cut him out of her life, he was her one weakness. She could never leave him as long as she thought he needed her and with him being with Kelly Ashley felt that he really needed her to keep him from doing anything else to ruin his life.


	7. Chapter 7

Title: Ride Of Your Life

Author: Adrian Jade

Summary: One day you wake up and realize that everything you thought mattered to you doesn't. John Cena has a girlfriend who he thinks he loves and a best friend who he knows he will always love. What happens when on a random pit stop to a Walmart they find something that could change all of their lives. John needs to choose where his heart belongs.

Disclaimer: I own all the people that you don't recognize. Everyone else own themselves and their characters belong to the WWE.

Phinnigan was up every 3 hours that night but Ashley and John traded off every other turn. Despite being awake more than she was asleep she still felt pretty rested.

"So where's Kelly?" Ashley asked. The whole "family" was lying in Ashley's bed. John had Phinnigan on his chest. He looked at Ashley a moment before answering.

"We had a fight and I left" John admitted.

"I'm sorry if you and Kelly are fighting had anything to do with me" Ashley said, but she was only being half honest.

"Kelly took something that I told her in confidence and turned it around to hurt you ... us fighting had nothing to do with you I would still be as pissed if she did it to Randy or any of my other friends"

"Kelly is a bitch plain and simple and the only reason I even tolerate her is because I care about you and if you feel you need to be with her then go ahead."

"I don't know anymore"

"Well you need to figure it out because people aren't going to wait forever" Ashley informed him "besides Kelly isn't the one for you ... your true soul mate is out there somewhere you just need to find her" with that being said Ashley began to doze off.

"But don't think you are forgiven because I am still so pissed at you I am just too tired right now but believe me when I wake up we are going to have a long talk about this" She closed her eyes.

John thought about what Ashley had just said to him, "I've already found her" he whispered. Phinnigan began to stir, he opened his eyes and looked at John.

"What do you say we let your mom sleep a little while longer and I'll give you a tour of where you'll be living for now on" John suggested. He then chided himself because the baby wasn't going to answer back. He got out of bed carefully not to wake up Ashley. John felt mixed up now. What were they ... best friends but she was also the mother of his son. This whole thing happened so fast and now it was finally catching up with him. For the first time in his life he felt the weight of responsibility on his shoulders. God his parents didn't even know yet. It had only been two days right ... but for 2 whole days they have had a grandson that they knew nothing about. Oh god he was already screwing up his kid and the poor baby was only about 4 days old.

"Dude get a hold of yourself" John scolded himself. He looked at Phinnigan who was staring at the ceiling fan.

"I'm a good dad right?" Phinnigan turned to where the voice came from and reached his little hand up to touch John's chin.

"I'm taking that as a yes ok" John informed "now come on this is a big house so lets get started"

John and Phinnigan left the bedroom and descended to the second floor, where they were bombarded with different pieces of furniture and moving men.

"Oh is this him?" Kyle practically squealed as he appeared before John.

John tightened his grip a little on Phinnigan. There was no way he was letting Kyle get anywhere near his son. John's feelings towards Kyle were simple it was the almost 2007 and he could do what he wanted as far as his sexual orientation but what freaked John out was everyone knew that Kyle had a little crush on John.

"Look at those pretty green eyes ... oh I knew my whole pale green wall color was going to work!"

"Good for you Kyle ... I'm just going to go down stairs now" John said slowly inching away from Kyle.

"By the way John nice boxers" Kyle called down to John when he was halfway down the stairs. It was only then did John realize that he had forgotten to put clothes on so he had been talking to Kyle wearing nothing but a pair of black Calvin Klein boxer briefs. He muttered curse words to himself as he walked into the kitchen. Isa was sitting on the counter drinking a cup of tea.

"Nice hair" John snickered.

"Don't you have a train to get hit by" Isa asked.

"Your wit never ceases to amaze me" Isa rolled her eyes.

"He's starting to get fussy which means you should probably either change him or feed him but I'm going with the first one cause he is about to scream ... extra diapers and wipes are in the hall closet, have fun daddy"

Phinnigan's face was getting redder and redder by the second. John could tell if he didn't do something soon he wasn't going to like what his son was going to do.

"No ... shh baby it's ok come on don't cry daddy is here to take care of you"

"I suggest you go now while he hasn't started screaming yet" Isa said.

John grabbed the supplies and spread out a blanket out on the floor before placing Phinnigan on it and getting ready to change him. He took a deep breath before undoing Phinnigan's pajamas.

"This can't be too hard I mean my parents changed my diapers all the time when I was a baby" John coached himself. He closed one eye as he undid Phinnigan's onesie and finally his diaper.

"Yo that is gross!" John exclaimed once he saw what was in the diaper.

"Oh sure you probably think this is so funny" he said grabbing some wipes.

He cringed once it was all over but he had done it ... he had changed his first diaper.

"That wasn't so hard" he said to himself.

"Hey dumbass you put the god damn diaper on wrong" Isabella commented from the doorway.

"You know what I give up" John threw his hands up in frustration.

"Move before you hurt yourself" Isa pushed John out of the way. She showed John how to properly change a diaper.

"How the hell do you know how to do that you hate kids?" John asked.

"It's called common sense you brain dead moron the tabs go in the front!"

"I don't know who I hate more you or Kyle"

"I'd say Kyle because at least you don't have to worry about me wanting to have sex with you" John shuddered.

"Toss me that blanket on the couch will ya" John said suddenly feeling naked.

Isa walked over to the couch and picked up the blanket was was draped over the back of it.

"You mean this blanket ..."

"Isa give me the blanket please" John said extending his hand.

"Why should I?" Isa placed her free hand on her chin as if to think about if she really wanted to give him the blanket.

"I really hate you" John said, but he had a smile on his face so Isa knew he wasn't serious.

She threw him the blanket which he caught and quickly wrapped around his waist. He felt so much better once he knew Kyle couldn't see him in his boxers again.

"You know I think you liked seeing me wearing just boxers otherwise you would have given me the blanket right away" John said bending down to pick up Phinnigan.

"Oh I just threw up a little in my mouth" Isa said holding her stomach.

"You know you want me" John said walking past her into the kitchen.

Isa went back to her tea while John began gather things to make Phinnigan a bottle.

"Can you hold him for 2 seconds?"

"Hey there big guy" Isabella cooed taking the baby from John.

"If I didn't know any better I'd think you liked him" John said pouring the formula into a bottle.

"Of course I like him" Isa said "he's a good baby who doesn't really cry and he likes music so we get along"

"He's unusually calm for a baby his age" John observed "I think I have only heard him cry a handful of times"

"If all babies were like him then I might have actually wanted one" Isa said

John laughed "with your luck you'd end up with Damien". Of course he was referring to the Omen movies.

"Yeah no kidding" Isa said.

"But seriously Isa not all kids are bad it all depends on how you raise em"

"Thank you Dr. Phil" Isa retorted.

"You are lucky my son's bottle is ready or otherwise I would respond to that" John said taking Phinnigan from her.

"So have you told your parents yet?" Isa asked.

"No I figured Ashley and I would drive up later today and tell them together" he answered.

"In other words you were too scared to tell your parents by yourself so you decided to have Ashley there so if they kill you there will be a witness"

"Basically"

"Listen Ash told me what you did ..." John cut her off before she could get another word in.

"It was an accident I didn't mean for it to come out the way it did but I honestly wasn't thinking and I just wanted Kelly to understand why I agreed to adopt Phinnigan" John was almost pleading for Isa to understand why he did what he did.

Isa blinked at him "First off you should really let people finish their sentences, second you probably want to burp him right about now" Isa gestured to Phinnigan.

"Whoops sorry Phin" John removed the bottle from Phinnigan's mouth and brought him up to his shoulder to burp him.

"Third of all I tried to help you out by reasoning with her but she is a stubborn ass who decided to throw a bitch fest and lock herself in the game room for most of the day. Leaving yours truly to take care of the kid.

"Why did you try to help me?' John asked.

"I may not like you all that much but I know that in some sick twisted sort of way you love Ashley and wouldn't want to hurt her like that"

"I do love her ... she's my best friend" John said.

"I think it's a little more than friendship for you am I right?"

"She is the one who decided to be just friends and I just let her go because I figured having her as a friend was better than not having her at all"

"And is it?"

"No, at least if I didn't have her at all she wouldn't be around all the time and I wouldn't have this constant reminder of what we once had ... I know we were both young and too caught up in ourselves to really make it work but we are both older and more mature now"

"What about Kelly do you love her?"

John took a minute to readjust Phinnigan in his arms and give him back his bottle. Phinnigan looked up at him as he sucked happily on his bottle. For a moment John was staring into Phinnigan's pale green eyes trying to find an answer but it wasn't in there, it was in his heart.

"I don't know" he finally admitted "I thought I did but now with everything going on I'm not so sure"

"Don't you think you should decide?" Isa asked.

"It's not that simple"

"Sure it is, you go up to Kelly and tell her that you think that she is nothing but a gold digging whore who isn't worth a minute of your time and you never want to see her again and after she smacks you in the face you find Ashley and take her in your arms and kiss her till neither one of you can breathe" Isabella explained "then tell her that you never wanted to break up with her and that you have always loved her and always will ... simple as that"

"Yeah and everything will just magically work itself out and Ashley and I will live happily ever after right ... maybe adopt a few more kids before moving somewhere quiet, oh maybe a big house in the country with a white picked fence and I'll retire and Ashley and I will grow old together and be the elderly couple who sit on the pouch in their rocking chairs just watching the sun set before we walking into the house holding hands" It was John's turn to roll his eyes "not going to happen"

"That was really descriptive so obviously you must have thought about this before"

"Stop trying to psychoanalyze me!" John said putting Phinnigan's empty bottle down and returning the baby to his shoulder.

"Well then stop making it so damn easy ... all I am saying is it is clear that you subconsciously had some hope of getting back together when you adopted Phinnigan ... you may not want to admit it but you want the family with the 2.5 kids and the minivan ... and you can laugh about it now but that empty space you feel inside won't be filled till you be a man and do something that makes you happy for once in your life ... Jesus man you are so in love with Ashley that you let her break up with you just so she could be happy and you have been miserable ever since and the only reason you are with Kelly is because she is a warm body in a cold bed"

"I'm walking away now and I'm taking my son with me" John said getting up from the table.

"I'm right and believe me I am going to bill you"

"Yeah ... yeah"

"I am right" Isabella said to herself as she watched him walk away "now all I have to do is get Ashley to admit she feels the same way. Don't worry Phinnigan Auntie Isabella has your best interest at heart ... mommy and daddy won't know what hit them"


	8. Chapter 8

_Title: Ride Of Your Life_

_Author: Adrian Jade_

_Summary: One day you wake up and realize that everything you thought mattered to you doesn't. John Cena has a girlfriend who he thinks he loves and a best friend who he knows he will always love. What happens when on a random pit stop to a Walmart they find something that could change all of their lives. John needs to choose where his heart belongs._

_Disclaimer: I own all the people that you don't recognize. Everyone else own themselves and their characters belong to the WWE._

_(A/N: Just a heads up to ease the confusion for the readers because both John and his dad are both in this chapter I will be referring to John's dad mostly as just Sr. Just thought I would let everyone know that)_

"So you and John are going to go visit his parents" Isa said flopping down on Ashley's bed.

"Yep" Ashley said trying to pack.

"So how do you feel about this?" Isa asked.

"About what?" Ashley asked.

"Duh! Going to see John's parents" Isa rolled her eyes.

"It doesn't bother me … I already know how it is going to go down"

"Oh really so what is going to happen?"

"We are going to get there and it is going to be awkward at first because John's parents can barely be in the same room with each other for more than 5 seconds and then we'll tell them and it will take a moment to process but then Carol will cry because she is finally getting the grandchild she has always wanted, and John Sr. will pat John on the back and say he's proud of him or something along those lines and then they'll ask if we are together and we'll have to tell them no and they will be disappointed but they will get over it and want to hold Phinnigan" she looked over at Isa and could see that she had her complete attention "then Carol will tell me later in private that she secretly hopes that John comes to his senses and breaks up with Kelly and that we get back together"

"Wow … I wish I could go with you guys to see how much of your theory is true"

"Trust me that is how it'll go down"

"Men entering the room if either of you are naked that is perfectly fine with me" John announced walking into the room with Phinnigan.

"You are disgusting" Isa remarked.

"Sticks and stones love"

"John make yourself useful and bring my bags to the car"

"Does it say Ashley's bitch across my forehead" John replied.

"Damn I was hoping you would never find out about that" Ashley remarked sarcastically.

"Fine whatever" John said handing Phinnigan to Ashley.

He grabbed Ashley's bags and left the room with them.

"You know eventually John is going to get tired of waiting … you can only keep him around for so long before he finds something else"

"Isa don't start" Ashley warned her.

"I'm just saying he won't be around forever"

"Jesus Christ! Why is everyone on me about getting with John" Ashley exclaimed "when I want to tell John that I want to be with him again I will"

"So you admit you want to get back together with John"

"Stop twisting my words around to suit your evil purposes" Ashley retorted.

"What about Isa and her evil purposes?" John asked walking back into the room.

"Nothing!" Ashley snapped.

John knew immediately that they were talking about him. He frowned a little at the two women.

"Well we aren't getting any younger so let's go" Ashley announced walking out of the room with baby Phinnigan.

John and Isa shared a look. No words were needed they both knew where each other stood. Isa shrugged and gave John a shy smile.

"She'll come around" was all Isa could say to comfort him.

"Yeah sure" John said disappointedly as he shook his head a little.

John walked out of the room with his head hanging low. He didn't want to put his heart out there only for Ashley to crush it again. He couldn't take rejection for a second time. He got in the car and pulled out of the driveway.

"You wanna talk about what you and Isa were discussing that got you so on edge?" John asked.

"It's nothing more that Isa trying to control my life"

"She only wants what is best for you" John reasoned.

"Yeah well she's been doing it for as long as I could remember … doesn't she know I'm a grown woman and can take care of myself"

"Sometimes my dear I think you forget that there are people here who care about you and only want to see you happy"

"Yeah well I'd be happy if people left me alone" she began fooling around with the radio.

John once again shook his head sometimes he had no idea why he bothered even trying to talk to Ashley because she usually only hear what she wanted to hear. She was still playing around with the radio when she got fed up and put in one of her cds in. Girlfriend by Avril Lavigne began to play. John grinned a little because he secretly believed that the song was describing how Ashley felt about his relationship with Kelly.

About half way into the trip Ashley fell asleep and John couldn't help but steal a glance at her every few seconds. He turned Ashley's cd off and flipped through her little cd book until he came across Bon Jovi's Crush album, he decided to listen to that. It's My Life began to play and John turned up the volume a little and began to jam. Ashley woke up and looked over at John. He was bobbing his head a little to the music and acting like a total goofball. She closed her eyes again but there was a smile plastered to her face. While she sat there with her eyes closed she thought about what Isa had said, she knew Isa was right of course she couldn't let John wait around forever but she wasn't sure she wanted to go back down that road. Although she did love John she was so afraid of what would happen if things didn't work out between them. She was afraid not to have John in her life and if they were to date again and something catastrophic happened and they parted on bad terms how could she live not having her best friend anymore. Although she knew that John would never intentionally hurt her and she would never go out of her way to hurt him the thought of loosing him was enough not to make her act upon the feelings she did have buried deep down for him. She fell asleep once again thinking about everything. The next thing she could remember is being gently shaken awake.

"What's going on?" she asked drowsily.

"We're here Sleeping Beauty so you need to wake up" John smiled at her.

"Leave me alone" she grumbled and closed her eyes once again.

He shook his head but continued smiling as he gently snaked his arms around her waist and pulled her out of the car. She opened her eyes to glare at him but even that didn't seem to faze him.

"Ok I'm awake you can put me on the ground now" she said annoyed.

"Ok" he said letting go of her.

She screamed because she thought she was going to fall but was incredibly relieved when he caught her again.

"Don't do that" she punched him in the shoulder.

"Now do you really think I would let you fall?" he asked.

"I never know with you" she retorted as he placed her safely on the ground.

John's father, who had heard someone scream came out to investigate and was very pleased to see his second oldest son and Ashley, whom he would always consider to be a daughter to him.

"Hey you two" he greeted both of them with a hug.

"Hey Old Man, how about you helping me with the bags" John suggested.

"Is Carol here yet?" Ashley asked the Elder Cena.

"Nope not yet" John Sr. replied.

Ashley went to the backseat and grabbed Phinnigan's carrier. John Sr. cocked an eyebrow at the baby.

"Dad I think we should leave the bags for now and we can all go inside and everything will be explained" John said.

"Yeah ok" John Sr. said in a total state of confusion.

Just as they were about to go inside Carol Cena pulled her car into the long dirt driveway and got out of her car.

"What was so important that I had to rush right over here?" she said looking from one person to another.

"Well at least we only have to explain this once" Ashley whispered to John.

"What's with the baby?" Carol asked.

"Like I said before lets head inside and talk about it somewhere there are seats around just in case someone feels light headed" John said.

Both Ashley and John entered the house but Carol and John Sr lagged behind for a few seconds.

"Do you have any idea what is going on?" Carol asked him.

"No, I was about to ask you the same question" he answered.

"Should we be worried?" she asked.

"With these two probably"

"Ok you two explain" John Sr said once all the adults were seated.

Phinnigan was resting comfortably in John's arms now and he was more than content just looking around at everything around him.

"Well guys you see … well there really is no easy way to explain this …"

"Jesus! John you make it sound like we killed someone" Ashley said "what John means to say is that we adopted a baby"

"I'm sorry I must have misheard you because I could have sworn I heard you just say that you and my son adopted a baby" John Sr said.

"Nope you heard me correctly" Ashley said shrugging.

"What the hell would posses you two to adopt a baby?" Sr asked.

"Well you see we found him in of all places a Walmart Parking lot and when I found out that they were going to be placing him in an orphanage I knew that we needed to do something so I convinced John to help me adopt him"

"That still doesn't explain why you would want to adopt a baby" Carol said.

"Ash, you don't have to go into details if you don't want to" John said taking her hand in his.

"It's ok your parents are like my parents too and they should know" Ashley said "I was beaten repeatedly as a teen and because of it I can never have any children of my own"

"Who beat you?" Sr. asked.

"After my mother died my father went off the deep end with grief and couldn't even look at us so he put me and my two brothers into foster care and unfortunately it wasn't a very good home and my foster parents beat me every chance they got but I made sure they never touched my brothers. Apparently being punched in the stomach repeatedly caused there to be so much scarring to my uterus the chances of me carrying a child at all let alone to term are slim to none" she explained "so when I found out the baby was being placed into an orphanage I panicked and ended up telling John my story and he agreed to help me out"

"Telling me her story helped Ashley realize that even though she would probably never have her own children she could still be someone's mom" John added.

"So guys I think it's time you officially met your grandson Phinnigan William Joshua Cena"

"So you guys are serious about this … this isn't some kind of cruel practical joke?" Sr. asked.

"We are serious as a heart attack" John responded.

"So who wants to hold their grandchild first?" Ashley asked excitedly.

After about 3 hours of being passed around from one adult to another Phinnigan began to get cranky and was put down for his nap. Ashley and Carol had gone out to pick up something for dinner leaving the men in charge of the baby.

"You know sometimes I still can't believe I'm his dad" John said peering down at his son while he slept.

"You and me both son" Sr. said "but in all seriousness I am really proud of you, it takes a lot to be someone's parent, but I still don't really understand why you agreed to help Ashley you have never shown any interest in children what so ever"

"That's simple dad I love her and all I want is to see her happy and she wanted a baby so I helped her get one"

"If you love her so much why are you still with Kelly?" Sr. asked.

"That's the question of the hour dad I'm not sure" John replied.

"Hey guys we are back with the food" Ashley yelled from down stairs.

John and his dad left Phinnigan to sleep and all the adults sat down to what actually turned out to be a very civilized dinner.

"Ok Ashley and John seeing as this will probably be the last time in quite a while I think you two should go out on the town and enjoy yourselves" Carol said.

"Ma, you're joking right?" John gave her a look.

"Just go ahead me and your father can watch Phin for you while you are gone"

"That's sweet of you guys really but we couldn't" Ashley said.

"Besides what happened to you guys not even wanting to be in the same room and now that I think of it where are my brothers?" John asked finally noticing that his younger brothers were nowhere to be found.

"Sean wanted to go camping so he dragged the other two along" Sr remarked with a laugh.

Ashley almost chocked on the water she had been drinking when she heard Sean wanted to go camping. It was a very amusing thought for all that knew Sean.

"We really do insist you guy go ahead and have a good time that way we can spend more time with our grandson" Carol said.

"It's up to Ash" John said.

Ashley thought about it for a moment and then agreed "One night out won't kill me".

Although she was still kind of nervous leaving her newborn son she knew that John's parents would take good care of him while they were gone. So both Ashley and John disappeared to get dressed and were ready about an hour later.

John found Ashley gazing down at Phinnigan. A smile spread over his face as he wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Little guy is knocked out" he said.

"Yeah and you know what I could just stand here and watch him sleep for the rest of my life"

"Do you not want to go out tonight because if you are going to feel funny about leaving him then we can stay here"

"No, it's fine we can go out and enjoy ourselves tonight ... I just can't help but wondering what scheme your parents are up to"

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"Ok how old is your brother Steve's daughter?"

"Atiana is 4" John replied.

"Have you ever heard your parents jumping to babysit your niece as fast as they offered with Phinnigan?" Ashley pointed out.

"Well no ..."

"Exactly those two have something up their sleeves"

"Now that you mention it they seemed way too civil to each other earlier and now that I stop and think about it that seems kinda creepy"

"Yeah just a little bit" Ashley agreed.

"Well anyways lets save my parents motives for the morning and enjoy our baby free night because god knows we probably won't have another one for a while"

Ashley forced herself to smile at him because she knew deep down that it would be her staying home with Phinnigan not him. Although she did want to give John the benefit of the doubt because for a man who has stated more than once that children weren't for him he seemed to genuinely care for baby Phin. She kissed Phinnigan's forehead and took John's outstretched hand and let him lead her out of the room.

"Have fun you two" Carol waved them off from the door way.

"We we've done our part now they have to do the rest" she said to her ex-husband "hopefully sooner rather than later Kelly will be out of the picture"

Both adults decided to head into Boston and take in the excitement of Newbury Street. Most of Newbury Street consisted of high end shops but at the very end of the strip there were a few dance clubs and restaurants.

"So my dear should we take in a club?" John asked.

"Why yes darling I believe we should" she agreed.

John laughed "We are such freaks"

"But we are lovable freaks"

"So I'm allowing you to use your one time check up phone call now" John said.

"If you think I am only going to check up on Phinnigan once tonight you are crazy" Ashley said walking away from him into the closest club.

John once again grinned and shook his head before fallowing her into the club. True to her word Ashley called John Sr and Carol on the hour every hour till the point where they unplugged the phone so she would stop calling. John would never admit this to Ashley but he himself called about 8 times to check up on the baby.

"You ok?" John asked.

"Are we bad parents leaving our 4 day old son at home with your parents so we can have fun and drink?" Ashley asked.

"No, Ash we are not bad parents Phinnigan is perfectly safe and sound with my parents and remember they offered"

"But he's a newborn baby John ... he needs so much care even for lets say a couple of hours he is going to need to be changed about 4 or 5 times and he needs to be fed every 2 to 3 hours"

"My parents raised 5 sons and a grandchild so I'm pretty sure they know what they are doing so stop worrying"

"Do you ever worry about anything?" she asked him.

"Yes I do but I never let other people know it" he replied.

"Now relax and enjoy the free drinks the lovely bartender keeps bringing us" John raised his shot glass a little to the bartender who just happened to be looking in their direction.

"Oh yes the perks of being a WWE superstar you get to consume more booze" she rolled her eyes "from now on I'm calling you Luke"

"Whatever you say Laura" he retorted giving her a smirk.

"That's just plain creepy that you got my reference"

"My mom watches GH" he said taking another shot.

"Dude you are boring" John whined about an hour later.

"What makes you say that?" Ashley asked.

"You've had like a beer and a shot since we've been here ... what happened to the girl who used to have shot competitions with me?"

"I don't feel like it tonight" she said.

"Yeah you are afraid that I'll beat you again" John taunted her.

"I am not you half drunk bastard" she countered.

"I think you are"

"Believe me I'm not" she said.

"Then prove it" he dared her.

"Ok buddy you are on"

A taxi brought both Ashley and John back to John's childhood home that night. They were both drunk off their asses and currently making out in the backseat of the cab.

"Ok you two get out of cab and into a room where people don't have to see you practically getting it on"

Ashley stumbled out of the cab first and then John followed throwing some money at the cab driver as he got out. John scooped Ashley up into his arms and carried her to the front porch. He then began fumbling with his keys.

"I can't get the key in the lock" John said hysterically laughing.

Ashley began laughing too and somehow they managed to get into the house. Everything was in darkness so they knew everyone was asleep.

"We need to get upstairs quietly" Ashley said to John.

"Ok baby anything you say" John said already beginning to undress his best friend with his eyes.

Although she knew it was wrong her whole body was sent into shivers when he called her baby. She looked over at John to see that he had already removed the shirt he had been wearing. So now he was standing before her only clad in a pair of dark blue jeans. She walked over to his and wrapped her arms around his neck pulling him into a very deep kiss. John didn't have to be told twice he picked her up and as quietly as two very drunken people could the made it to their room and spent the night in each other's arms.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9: A Thanksgiving Ultimatum

November 21 ... 8:30 PM

"Auntie how come daddy is so nervous about going to see my grandparents?" Dean asked Ashley while they waited patiently for the next available hairdresser to cut Dean's hair.

"He just really wants his parents to love you kiddo" she smiled and patted his hand.

"Why wouldn't they love me?" he asked.

"Dean the minute Bob and Elaine see you they are going to fall so in love with you like the rest of us did" Ashley assured the young boy before he began to worry.

"But what if they don't like me?" he asked.

"Then it's their loss because you are one of the most amazing little boys I have ever met" Ashley replied honestly.

She was still amazed at how far Dean had come in 4 months time. He was a very polite and intelligent individual. He wasn't the only one that changed though, Ashley was more than happy in saying that she had been wrong because it seemed that having Dean around was the kick in the ass Randy needed to start acting responsible.

"I love you Auntie" Dean said leaning into her.

"I love you too Kiddo and I always will" she kissed the top of his head.

"So have you met my daddy's new girlfriend Courtney?"

"Yes I have and I really like her" Ashley said.

"Yes she's so much better than Uncle John's girlfriend" Dean said.

"Well yeah most people are better than Kelly"

"Dean" the hairdresser called his name.

"Looks like you are up" Ashley said taking his hand and walking with him to get his very first real haircut.

Dean ran his hand through his now very short buzz cut and couldn't help but grin. His hair had been a little past his ears before he had gotten it cut.

"My head feels lighter" he said.

Ashley laughed a little and shook her head and thought that only her nephew would say something like that.

"So little boy lets get you a nice outfit for tomorrow" she said "you want to make a good first impression so that means you are going to need a nice long bath tonight and some nice new formal clothes"

Ashley picked out a dark blue button up dress shirt and a pair of black dress pants for the young boy to wear. She also bought him a belt and a pair of dress shoes.

"Dean do you want to wear a tie?" she asked him.

"No" he said.

"Ok" she said although she thought the tie would have looked nicer she wasn't about to fight with him about it.

"Do I really need to take a long bath?" he asked as they left the mall.

"Oh yeah, you little boy seem to just attract dirt so you'll need to be scrubbed from head to toe" she said.

"I hate baths" he said crossing his arms.

"Most children do but you want to make a good impression on your grandparents right"

"I guess ... it was so much easier when I didn't have grandparents cause then I didn't have to worry about making a good impression" he complained.

"You are 4 ,what do you really have to worry about" she said "just be yourself and you'll be fine"

November 22, 10 AM

"I can't believe I'm finally going to get the chance to meet your family baby" Kelly said excitedly.

"Yep" John said watching the Thanksgiving Day Parade.

It was always his and Ashley's tradition to watch the parade together but as of late he hadn't really seen much of Ashley. He knew that they had a lot to talk about since that night but neither one seemed able to deal with the awkwardness that went along with it. One thing he knew was that he didn't regret what happened, he regretted the timing of course but he knew now more than ever that he was in love with Ashley and he would do everything in his power to get her back.

"So have you talked to Ashley is she still going to your dad's house with us?" Kelly asked.

"I have no idea what she is doing I haven't talked to her since Sunday night" he admitted.

"What's up with you two I have hardly seen her around since you guys went to your dad's and that was like 4 months ago"

"We have just been really busy that's all" John lied "things will go back to normal soon enough"

"I'm not complaining though I mean the less time I have to spend with Ashley the better"

"What the hell is the matter with you she hasn't even said one word to you in a very long time and you still have to start shit... will you give it a rest" John exploded at her.

"What the hell is the matter with you?" Kelly asked a little taken back at John's sudden outburst.

"Nothing" he said moodily returning his attention back to the television.

"Whatever I'll be back in a little while try and calm down will you"

John grunted in response and once again returned his attention to the screen. After about 5 minutes he got bored and decided to go track down his best friend and baby son. He knew their hotel room was one floor below them. He took the stairs two at a time and nearly sprinted down the hall. If he was going to do this he wanted to do it right now. He knocked and waited patiently for her to answer.

"Hi Uncle John" Dean grinned broadly as he answered the door.

"Dean why are you answering the door by yourself?" John asked him.

"Daddy looked through the peep hole first and then said I could answer the door" Dean explained.

"Oh ok" John stepped into the hotel room.

Young Randal was pacing the room shirtless. Ashley clad in a pair of jeans and a olive green tank top stood ironing Randy's light blue dress shirt.

"Randy will you calm down what is the worst thing that could happen?" Ashley asked.

"Dean earmuffs" Randy ordered.

Dean placed his hands over his ears and went and had a seat on the couch.

"I'm very worried that they won't like Dean and think I am waisting my time even bothering to take care of him ... I love that little boy and would put my life on the line to protect him" Randy said.

Ashley stopped ironing and went over and gave Randy a hug. She placed her hand on his cheek and just stood there for a moment.

"I'm not going to lie to you it is very possible that your parents will think you are making a mistake and if they do then screw them because you still have family who love both you and Dean"

"How is it you can always make me and John feel so much better by just talking to us?" Randy asked.

"Because I know what to say to you guys to make you feel better" she smiled at him.

"Ashley is right man you have nothing to worry about" John said.

Ashley looked startled for a moment, she had not realized that John had graced them with his presence. She smiled shyly at him and continued ironing.

"Where's Phin?" he asked.

At that precise moment 4 month old Phinnigan's voice could be heard coming over the baby monitor.

"Perfect timing" he grinned to himself before going to go get his son.

"Randy can I talk to you in the other room for a minute?" Ashley asked.

"Yeah sure" he said.

"Daddy can I remove the ear muff now?" Dean asked impatiently.

"Whoops sorry buddy yeah you can remove them now ... I'll be right back I have to talk to auntie for a second ok"

Ashley grabbed Randy's hand and started pulling him into the bedroom. They passed John and Phinnigan on the way by.

"Where are you two going?" John asked them.

"Randy needs to help me close my suitcase ... you know me too many clothes" she lied.

Once they were in the bedroom Ashley closed the door behind them and locked it. She turned around to face Randy and he could see she was near hyperventilating.

"What's up and why did you lie to John?" he asked concerned.

"I have something to tell you and it's not really that easy to say" she told him.

"Well take a deep breath and just say it"

"John and I slept together when we went to visit his parents 4 months ago" she blurted out.

"Wow that one was unexpected" he said feeling the need to sit down.

He put his head down as he let the shock wear off. He couldn't really think of anything to say at the present moment. His two best friends slept together and neither of them thought to tell him. Then it hit him ... John was still with Kelly.

"OH MY GOD ASH YOU ARE OTHER WOMAN!" Randy exclaimed loudly.

"Shhh I don't think the entire floor heard you" she whispered furiously.

"I just can't believe it ... well I mean I can kinda believe it I knew that eventually John was going to cheat on that gold digging whore but I never once thought it would be with you"

"We were drunk" she said.

Randy grinned a little to himself "Hey Ashley did John make you moan"

"I hate you so much" she said.

"He did didn't he"

"Why don't you have sex with him and find out" Ashley retorted.

"Because I'm not gay" Randy said.

"You sure about that there partner"

"In case you have forgotten I have a girlfriend ... remember Courtney"

"She's a cover you know you like to take it in the bucket"

"Fuck you ... oh wait that's John's job"

"Seriously you can not tell anyone that you know because you are the only person besides me and John who knows about our little sexcapade"

"You have my word that I will not tell a soul" Randy promised.

"But now I'm all confused because that night was amazing ... John was well all I can really say is he was truly electrifying and I truly forgot until then what a fantastic lover he is"

"Dude ... TMI ... TMI" Randy started rocking back and forth.

"Oh grow the fuck up"

Randy stood up and walked over to Ashley. She didn't look him in the eyes so he lifted her chin so she was looking into his eyes.

"Everything will be ok" he said giving her a hug.

John chose that precise moment to walk into the room to see his best friend hugging his other shirtless best friend. For some strange reason that he could not understand at all he felt a pang of jealousy running through his veins. He clenched and unclenched his fists which were conveniently in his pockets.

"Rans you mind if I talk to Ash for a minute?" he asked.

"Yeah sure" he said "I'll be in the other room with the boys"

As he was leaving he shut the door behind them figuring they would need some privacy to talk. John just looked at Ashley for a minute trying to figure out what to say to her.

"So what do you need to talk to me about?" she asked.

"I think you know what" he said "we need to clear the air here and try to find out where we stand"

"Do we really have to do this right now?" she asked "on Thanksgiving no less"

"Yes we have to do this now ... too much time has passed by and there still is this awkwardness between us"

"John please ..." she started.

"Ashley I love you, I've been in love with you since the first moment I saw you all those years ago and I loved you even after you broke up with me and it seems that I love you even more now because you let me share a son with you"

"John you shouldn't be saying this" she advised him.

"I'm not afraid anymore Ashley I don't care who knows that I am so head over heels in love with you, in fact I feel like going to the top of this building and yelling it to the world"

"You need to stop please John just stop" she said starting to get upset.

"What are you so afraid of?" he asked.

"I'm afraid of loosing you" she finally admitted "I'm so petrified of being with you and having something horrible happen and we break up and then we hate each other ... I wouldn't be able to deal with that"

"That would never happen Ash I promise you that"

"Can you really know that John I mean you already cheated on Kelly ... can you really guarantee that we could really last forever"

"You and I both know that I don't love Kelly and that the only reason I'm with her is because I have this empty void in my heart that seems to only go away when I'm holding you in my arms"

"I can't loose you or Randy because it would kill me ... you two are like my pillars of strength if I ever lost either of you I don't know what I would do ... I depend so much on you both"

"You will never loose me or Randy because we won't let it happen" he said "we need you in our lives too"

"I do love you John I always have and probably always will I am just so tired of lying to myself"

"Then it's settled I'm going to tell Kelly about everything after Thanksgiving dinner"

"Are you really sure about this?" she asked.

He pulled her into his arms "I've never been more sure about anything"

He brought his head down and captured her lips with his own. It got steamy pretty kick and they both fell back on the bed. They were just content with laying in bed and everyone and a while making out.

"I feel like a teen again having a secret relationship ... and just for the record I hate that I am the other woman as Randy so bluntly put it"

"You told Randy?" John asked.

"Yeah that is what we were talking about before you walked in here" she answered.

"As far as I'm concerned you are not the other woman Kelly is because no matter what you always had my heart"

"Sometimes you are so sappy but I love it"

There was a knock on the door. A very depressed looking Randy walked into the room.

"Rans what's up?" Ashley asked.

"There's been a freak blizzard in St. Louis my parents just called and told me that the airports are closed ... me and Dean aren't going home for Thanksgiving"

"Rans I know you were looking forward to seeing your folks but you are more than welcome to tag along with us" she said untangling herself from John's arms and going to hug Randy.

"Would you guys mind?" he asked.

"The more the merrier" John said smiling.

"Dean will have a ball playing with Atiana"

"Yeah you are right but it still sucks that I can't see my folks and siblings"

"So ask Vince for some time off"Ashley suggested.

"I think I might do that"

"You should man" John said

"So to bring up another subject I see you two worked out the awkwardness" Randy smirked at his two best friends.

"We sure did" John wrapped an arm around Ashley's waist and kissed the top of her head.

"I'm happy for you two" Randy gave them his blessing "it's about time"

"Well I need to get the baby dressed and bathed so I'll let you men talk amongst yourselves" Ashley said excusing herself from the room.

John watched her leave and couldn't get the smile off of his face. He couldn't believe that she was all his again. He was on top of the world and nothing could go wrong now.

"So out of curiosity how do you think Kelly is going to take this?" Randy asked.

Shit, John had forgotten about Kelly until that very moment. He wanted to punch Randy in the face for ruining his blissful moment. He bit down on his lip and tried to imagine what he was going to say to the woman who had been his girlfriend for almost a year.

"I imagine she's not going to be very happy about it" John said.

"Well duh man I mean her and Ash hate each other so it's going to be a pretty big blow to Kelly's ego to loose you to her but part of her must expect it because it's pretty obvious to everyone around you and Ash that you were in love with her"

"Was it really that obvious?" John asked.

"Umm yeah just a lot"

John had a seat on the bed and put his head in his hands. He needed to think really long and hard what he was going to say to Kelly. Whatever he did say he really didn't want to cause Kelly any pain, he just simply didn't love her and she really couldn't hold that against him. Randy left John to his thoughts. Ashley returned 20 minutes later with a towel clad Phinnigan. It was amazing to John how big Phinnigan had gotten in such a short time. He now weighed 16 pounds and almost tripled in size. He was only 4 months old but needed to be in 9 month old clothes. He could sit himself up for short periods of time now and last week he had managed to crawl around a little on Ashley's bed. To say the little baby was growing up way too fast would be an understatement. Ashley began to get him dressed but he was squirming around and being very uncooperative.

"Ok, Phinney do you want daddy to get you dressed?" Ashley asked.

He gurgled and laughed a little in response. Then he put his fist into his mouth and began to chew on it.

"That's a good enough answer for me John get him dressed" Ashley said.

John stood up and walked over to the baby. He smiled as the baby kicked his legs in excitement.

"You giving your mom a hard time little guy?" he asked before beginning to blow raspberries on the baby's stomach. Phinnigan began to laugh and both parents couldn't help but smile because the baby had a very cute laugh.

"He really loves you John you know that right I mean his whole face lights up when you walk into the room" Ashley told him "it's like he knows your voice and perks up the moment he hears it"

"Well I'm his dad right why wouldn't he love his dad" John said as he finished putting Phinnigan's pants on. Then he picked the infant up and Ashley helped him get his onsie over Phinnigan's rather large head.

"Do all babies have big heads or is it just him?" John asked.

"He does not have a big head" Ashley protested.

Phinnigan began to cry a little. Ashley picked him up and began rubbing his back and she walked around the room with him.

"Nice going John you made him upset because you said he had a big head"

"I'm sure he didn't understand that I insulted him" John scoffed.

"Oh he knows ... he knows" Ashley said "shh it's ok honey you don't have a big head and daddy is sorry for saying you do"

Phinnigan stopped crying and rested his head on his mother's shoulder. She ran her fingers through his thick light brown hair. He stuck his thumb into his mouth and closed his eyes.

"Mama's boy" John said.

"Well what would you expect he spends more time with me then he does you" Ashley said handing Phinnigan to John so she could brush his hair. He lazily opened up one eyes as he was being handed over but closed it again when he knew he was still in the safety of someone's arms. Phinnigan was one of those babies who loved to be held and unless he was sleeping he expected you to hold him all the time. John had a seat with the baby on the bed and managed to get his white dress shirt and vest on. They were all dressing up formally for thanksgiving dinner.

"Ok I'll be back in a little while I'm going to go take a shower and get dressed" John said handing the baby back to Ashley. He gave both her and the baby a kiss before leaving the room. Ashley sighed as she brought Phinnigan in the other room and placed him in his swing.

"I'm going to head into the shower" she told Randy.

"Ok" Randy said from his spot on the floor where he and Dean were playing with the little boy's trucks.

"Daddy are there gonna be any kids my age at Uncle John's daddy's house?" Dean asked.

"Yep, John has a niece that is the same age as you" Randy informed his son.

"Yay! Someone to play with" Dean exclaimed excitedly.

"I thought you'd like that" Randy grinned at him "I'm sorry we couldn't go and meet your grandparents"

"It's ok daddy I like this idea better cause then I don't have to be nervous about them liking me"

"What makes you say that?" Randy asked.

"I heard you and Courtney talking about it the other day" Dean admitted.

"You have nothing to worry about because no matter what I love you and that's all that matters" Randy told his son.

"I love you too daddy" Dean jumped into his father's arms and they began to play wrestle.

Ashley left the bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror. She was wearing a red halter sundress she had pulled her long chestnut locks into a ponytail and to finish off her look she wore the locket her mother had given her for her 12th birthday that she only wore on special occasions.

John and Kelly showed up about 45 minutes later and they all piled into Ashley's Escalade. Randy drove and Kelly sat in the passenger seat. Ashley and the two kids were in the middle and John somehow got stranded in the very back all by himself. During their 90 minute journey Kelly couldn't help but steal glances at both Ashley and John. They were laughing and whispering in each other's ears and Kelly couldn't help but feel panic's icy clutches nipping at her heart, she needed to think of something that would finally make John put her instead of Ashley first. Then it hit her and a broad smile spread across her face. She knew what she had to do ... it was cruel to even think about but she needed to do it to finally have John all to herself.

"I love you" John whispered in Ashley's ear.

"I love you too" she whispered back.

"Daddy are we there yet?" Dean whined.

"10 more minutes buddy" Randy said.

"Ok daddy"

Kelly really didn't want to admit it out loud but she had actually grown attached to both Dean and Phinnigan. She thought they were two very cute and well behaved children. She looked at Phinnigan and felt a little remorse at what she was going to do, with any luck Ashley would take the baby and leave town and although she would miss the baby she would get over it and she was sure John would to after time.

"Ok folks we are here" Randy announced pulling into the driveway.

Everyone piled out of the car. John grabbed Phinnigan and walked next to Kelly into the house. Randy wrapped his arm around Ashley's shoulders and they walked into the house like that.

"ASHLEY" a very rambunctious 4 year old girl jumped into Ashley's arms.

"Now that is what I call a greeting you people should learn from Atiana" Ashley laughed.

"I missed you" Atiana told her favorite person in the whole world.

"I missed you too baby" she said putting Atiana back down on the floor.

"Come see my Barbies" Atiana said grabbing Ashley's hand "I brought them so we could play like we always do when I see you"

"Tia, I want you to meet Randy's son Dean" Ashley introduced the two children "maybe he'll play Barbies with us too"

"I don't wanna play with dolls" Dean scoffed "Barbies are stupid"

"No they aren't" Atiana stuck her tongue out at Dean.

"Well maybe you two could do something you both like to do" Steve, Atiana's father suggested.

"Do you like to color?" Atiana asked.

"Yeah" Dean replied.

"Well then lets go" she pulled him into the other room.

"Does anyone else hear wedding bells in the future?" Ashley asked.

"Leave my baby alone" Steve said.

"How are you Steve?" Ashley asked giving him a hug "where's Jessica?"

"I'm doing fine thanks for asking and Jess had to work but she sends everyone her love" he replied.

"Must suck to have to work on holidays" Randy said.

"More money" John said.

"More taxes" Ashley retorted to John's comment.

"Where are the others?" John asked.

"Dad went to the store and Sean, Matt and Dan are watching a movie in the other room"

"Steve, this is my girlfriend Kelly" John said.

"It's nice to finally meet you" Steve shook Kelly's hand.

"You too Steve, John has told me so much about all of you"

"Only the bad stuff bro you know me" John cracked a smile.

"Well I should probably check on the turkey" Steve said.

"Do you know what you are doing?" Ashley asked Steve.

"Yeah you just take the thingy and spray the the stuff on the turkey" was Steve's explanation.

"Yeah I'm going to go and help him out so he doesn't set himself or the house on fire" Ashley said.

Ashley followed Steve into the kitchen. She opened up the stove and had a look at the turkey.

"So Kelly doesn't seem so bad" Steve said.

"Give her time"

"So my nephew, who's idea was that?" Steve asked with a small smirk.

"It's a really long and complicated story but it was a mutual decision after I nagged him for about 20 minutes"

"That boy is whipped" Steve laughed.

"Yeah, just don't let him know it" she looked around the room to make sure no one was around "I have some very interesting news ... there could very well be a reconciliation in the near future"

"Really Sil that's awesome"

"Sil?"

"Sister in law ... I mean you and John are practically married and I assume the reconciliation you are referring to is you and him"

"Well ok Bil" she said with a laugh.

There was a loud rumble coming from the second floor of the home and all of a sudden Ashley and Steve could see Sean tumbling down the stairs. He stood up and brushed himself off.

"That was interesting" he said to them.

Ashley gave Steve a very confused look and he just shrugged and continued to stare at his youngest brother.

"Umm ... are you ok?" Ashley was almost afraid to ask.

"Yeah, Matt's sneakers were right by the stairs and I didn't see them hence the Kamikaze dive" he explained "I've had worse near death incidents"

"You know I should know better than to be surprised by now" Ashley said.

"You and me both" Steve replied.

"Yo assholes get down here and meet John's girlfriend" Sean yelled up the stairs to his brothers.

That was probably the most interesting thing that happened that day ... well that is before dinner of course. After dinner was served the adults retired to the living room to relax while the kids played in the other room.

"Hey Johnny do you think we could go somewhere and talk for a few minutes?" Kelly asked.

"Yeah sure" John said reluctantly getting up from the chair he was sitting in.

"Ugh, Phin needs a diaper change and I really don't feel like moving" Ashley complained. She and Randy were sprawled out on the couch.

"Fabo, you feel like changing your grandson?" she asked John's dad.

"No" he replied.

"Do any of Phin's uncles want to bond with him?" Ashley asked hoping she really wouldn't have to get up.

They thought about it for a moment before all three men said no at the same time.

"I'll remember this moment"

"Just go change the kid" Sean said.

_Meanwhile with Kelly and John ..._

"So what did you need to talk to me about?" John asked.

"I have some really good news" she said.

"Ok let's hear it then" John said wanting to hurry this along so they could have the talk he wanted to.

"Well ... Johnny you are going to be a daddy again" Kelly lied.

"I'm sorry what" John asked shocked at what he was hearing.

"I said we're having a baby"

"Wow this can't be happening right now" John said beginning to pace the room.

"Why aren't you happy about this?" Kelly asked.

"Well it's kinda unexpected for one thing I mean it's not like we planned this"

"Oh I get it you'll go out and adopt a baby with Ashley but when you find out you are having one with me you freak out that's pretty fucked up John" Kelly said starting to get mad.

"That's not even the issue" John stated.

"Then what is it John ... huh, I mean you are having another child, a biological child I might add most people would I don't know be happy about this"

"I just need some time"

"No what you need to do is make a choice John ... it's either going to be me or her I am tired of playing second best you her" Kelly told him "you don't owe her anything anymore she has her son you have done your part now you have a chance to have a family with me without her ... you need to decide what you want to do and it needs to be right now"

"You can't really expect me to sit here and choose between you and my best friend who I have known for years"

"I can and I am ... John think for one second about our child"

The words "our child" made John shiver. He didn't want to have to be dealing with his right now. This was the lat thing he expected and certainly the last thing he wanted.

"Make a choice now John, me or her"

"This is really unfair"

"Just choose damn it"

"Fine ... I choose you alright are you happy now" John yelled.

The door opened and John and Kelly could see Ashley standing there. She didn't bother to hide the tears that were falling freely down her tanned face.

"I just came up here to get Phin's diaper bag please don't let me interrupt you"

She looked at the two of them one last time before turning around and walking back down the stairs. She wiped her eyes before entering the living room. But it was no good they were going to be able to know that she was crying.

"I've gotta go" she announced suddenly grabbing Phinnigan and without another word she was out the door.

"Ashley wait please" John called after her, he too went out the front door without another word.

"This can't be good" Randy said.

"Ash ... please don't leave" Ashley was just about to jump into the driver's seat of her Escalade. John grabbed her arm to prevent her from entering the car.

" You know John I gave you at least a year before you broke my heart but what's it been like 5 hours ... man that's a new record, someone should call up Ripley's or something"

"Ash please hear me out"

"No John for once in Kelly's life she was right you don't owe me or Phinnigan anything"

"Please baby don't be like that I love you and you need to know that"

"If you really loved me you would have chosen me and not Kelly"

"It's complicated" he said.

"This is exactly what I was afraid of happening and now it has so I'm going to leave here with what is left of my pride" she said ripping her arm out of his grasp and jumping into the truck.

"Have a good life John" she said shutting her door and driving off.


	10. Chapter 10

_Title: Ride Of Your Life_

_Author: Adrian Jade_

_Summary: One day you wake up and realize that everything you thought mattered to you doesn't. John Cena has a girlfriend who he thinks he loves and a best friend who he knows he will always love. What happens when on a random pit stop to a Walmart they find something that could change all of their lives. John needs to choose where his heart belongs._

_Disclaimer: I own all the people that you don't recognize. Everyone else own themselves and their characters belong to the WWE._

_Chapter10: More Than A Memory_

_People say she's only in my head. It's gonna take time but I'll forget._

_Flashback_

_Rain was pelting his windshield John was doing 90 to try and get to Ashley's house. He needed to explain to her why he made the choice he did. He was too concerned with trying to win his best friend back than his own personal well being. By the luck of some higher power he made it to her house in one piece. He let himself into the home using the key she had once gave him and stepped into a very empty foyer._

"_Hello" he called out to someone._

_He did a once over almost all of Ashley and Isabella's furniture was gone. He stood in the middle of the barely furnished living room. He walked over to the fireplace where all of their pictures had once been. There was only one left it was of him and Ashley at New Year Eve 2 years ago. Their bright smiling faces made his heart ache. He had his arm wrapped around her waist and they both had cups of beer in their hands. He ran his fingers over the picture as almost to try and go back to that time._

"_May I help you?" an older gentleman entered the room._

"_Who are you?" John asked._

"_I should be asking you the same question ... why are you in my house?"_

"_What do you mean your house, what happened to the owners who lived here before"_

"_Wait you must be John ... one of the young women left something here for you" he left the room and returned a few minutes later with an envelope. John opened it and read it's contents._

_John,_

_Isa asked me to go on tour in Europe with her and I accepted. Please don't try and contact me, I'm moving on and I suggest you do the same. Phinnigan is ok so don't worry about him. I want you to have a good life._

_Ashley_

_So this is the way she wanted to end everything. He could only nod and put the letter in his pocket._

"_I'm sorry to have disturbed you" he told the man._

"_It's quite alright but I will need to have that key"_

"_Oh yeah" John handed him the key._

_On the way out he grabbed the picture from the mantle place and walked out of the house and into the fury of the on coming storm._

_People say she's only in my head. It's gonna take time but I'll forget._

John stared at the clock beside his bed. It was 2 AM and he was trying everything in his power to fall asleep but he couldn't. He didn't want to fall asleep because his dreams haunted him. He decided to take a shower because at least that would give him something to do instead of just lying there miserable. The hot water hit his face and not even that could make his mood any better. He got out of the shower and got dressed. He picked up the phone from his nightstand and dialed Ashley's number.

"_Hi you've reached Ash. I'm not here right now leave a message and I'll call you back"_

He never left a message thought. He called her cellphone at least 3 times a day just so that he could hear her voice again. He walked into his kitchen and made himself a sandwich. He looked down at his meal of a ham sandwich and chips, he had one bite and just left it there on the counter. He grabbed his trusty bottle of Jack Daniels and a beer before entering his living room. He shivered at the cool air of his home.

He threw some wood into his fire place and lit a match. He had 2 sips of the Jack Daniels but got frustrated that even that didn't help him so without even thinking he threw the half drunken bottle right at the fireplace and watched as the flame exploded. He left the room and ventured over to his hall closet and pulled out a box containing everything that ever had anything to do with Ashley. He returned to the living room and proceeded to throw everything into the fireplace. Including the picture that he had retrieved from Ashley's old house. Once he had finished that he sunk to his knees and began to sob uncontrollably.

"Please someone just please help me" he screamed at the top of his lungs.

"Help me" he then whispered.

He grabbed the phone again and dialed Randy's number. It rang a few times and then a very groggy and pissed off Randy answered.

"_Hello" he said while yawning._

"Hey man what's up?" John asked.

"_Dude it's 2:30 in the morning"_

"I know but I just needed someone to talk to"

"_John it's going to be alright_" Randy said.

"Thanks man that's all I needed to hear"

Randy hung up the phone and John just sat there in the same spot for a few minutes before going over to look at himself in the mirror. He looked like hell, he hadn't shaved in weeks and his eyes were blood shot and puffy. But at this point he really didn't care about his appearance

He took a seat in his favorite chair and flicked through the channels. But nothing was on TV at this hour. He took a sip of his beer and tried to place it one the coffee table next to him but he missed and half the beer spilled onto the floor before he caught it and placed it safely on the table. He got tired after a few minutes of staring at the blank screen. He finished the rest of his beer and then got some paper towels to clean up his mess. He threw the rest of his sandwich away and put his dirty dish in the sink. He returned to his bed room and pulled his shirt off before getting back into bed and turning off the lights.

_People say she's only in my head. It's gonna take time but I'll forget._


	11. Chapter 11

_Title: Ride Of Your Life_

_Author: Adrian Jade_

_Summary: One day you wake up and realize that everything you thought mattered to you doesn't. John Cena has a girlfriend who he thinks he loves and a best friend who he knows he will always love. What happens when on a random pit stop to a Walmart they find something that could change all of their lives. John needs to choose where his heart belongs._

_Disclaimer: I own all the people that you don't recognize. Everyone else own themselves and their characters belong to the WWE._

_Chapter 11: This is Your Life Now_

"Home sweet home" Ashley said to a sleeping Phinnigan walking into their new home. They had spent the morning in the park and it had tired little Phinnigan out.

"I have a good feeling about this Phinney life here is going to be different but we'll get through it" she kissed the top of the baby's head.

She looked around the place she was now calling home. It was small compared to her other house but seeing as it was only her and Phinnigan how much space did they really need. She closed the door behind her and carefully removed her coat. She brought Phinnigan to his room and placed him in his crib. Next she ventured to her small little office that had the amazing view of the harbor and watched the last of the fishing boats go out to sea. She sighed and breathed deep the salty smell of the sea.

"Brisbane, Australia who would have thought" she laughed a little to herself "my own little piece of heaven"

There was a knock on her door and she wondered who the hell would want to bother her. The knocking continued to get louder and she knew if she didn't answer the door the person was going to wake up Phinnigan. She cursed under her breath and got up out if her comfortable chair and went to answer the door.

"Hey sis" Keegan, her 14 year old brother smiled gladly when she opened the door.

"Keegan, what are you doing here ... better question how are you here?" she asked shocked to see her little brother.

"I had a fight with dad so I called Randy and got your address" he explained "he didn't want to give it to me at first but I explained the story to him and he knew I needed some time away so he gave me your location"

"Come in" she stepped aside and he entered the home.

"Sweet place" he said looking around.

"Does dad know you are here?" she asked.

"Not yet" Keegan replied.

"Your ass is going to get on the phone right now and call him to let him know you are ok and safe with me"

"Ashley, I'm 14 years old I don't have to check in with daddy anymore"

"Call him" Ashley firmly demanded.

"Fine" Keegan relented as she handed him the phone.

After a very awkward conversation he handed Ashley the phone and it was her turn to talk to her father.

"Hey dad" she said stepping out of the room "what happened?"

"_We got into a fight about the fact that I am dating again"_ Chris explained.

"Wait when did you start dating?" Ashley asked.

Chris sighed, he knew he should have told his children about this sooner _"About the same time you adopted Phinnigan"_

"So do you really wonder why he got pissed ... I agree that you should have your own life and stuff but dad things like you dating effects all of us not just you"

"_Look I'm sorry ok but it's not an easy topic to bring up"_ he said starting to get defensive.

"Who are you dating?" Ashley asked.

"_Lilian Garcia"_ he replied.

"Well dad you could have done much worse" Ash said "you have my approval"

"_Thanks ... I think Keegan might be a little emotionally scarred ... he kinda walked in on us"_

"Dad! There is some stuff I don't need to know and that" Ashley exclaimed appalled.

Chris just laughed _"So what are we going to do about Keegan"_

"Well it is summer so let him enjoy the Australian hospitality and I'll send him home a week before school starts back up"

"_Normally I would say no but I think you could use some company around you, I don't like that you are living so far away by yourself"_

"Dad, I'm fine out here on my own" she rolled her eyes "for the first time in a while I feel free"

"_Please be careful out there ok that is all I ask ... stay safe"_

"Ok, no wild parties every other night, just once a week" she joked.

"_Well I should be going"_ he said _"tell your brother I love him"_

"Will do and don't do anything I wouldn't do" she smirked.

"_I can't promise any thing"_

"Eww"

"_I love you baby girl"_

"I love you too dad"

She hung up the phone and returned to the living room to find her brother watching her brand new plasma television.

"Your TV is amazing" he said.

"Should be for the money I paid for it" she said having a seat next to him on the couch.

"So, what's going on in your life?" he asked "we haven't really had any time to talk recently"

"Same old shit, different day ... no actually we've been doing really good I mean it was hell the first couple of months but since we've been here everything has been perfect" she replied.

"I'm glad you are doing good" he said taking her hand in his.

"So why didn't you go stay with Connor, not that I am complaining?" she asked.

"Because Connor has his whole police academy thing going on and I didn't want to add extra stress and besides you live in paradise like I was going to pass this up"

"Well come on little brother I'll show you where you will be sleeping"

Later that night they all had dinner. Ashley sat attempting to feed 10 month old Phinnigan his baby food but he seemed for interested with playing with it then eating it. Keegan just watched them with amusement. Phinnigan was driving Ashley to the brink of insanity.

"Gee, he's kinda a pain in the ass" Keegan said.

"So were you at his age" she retorted.

"You can't even remember me at his age" Keegan countered.

"Oh believe me I do" she said "you used to scream for no apparent reason at all and there are very few baby pictures of your where you weren't crying and you used to torment mom and dad"

"I wish I could remember mom ... I mean really remember her" Keegan said.

"You were little when she died so it's understandable that you don't remember her as well as me and Connor do"

"Sometimes I get so jealous of the time you and Connor got with mom before I was born" he said "there is so much stuff I feel I was cheated out of"

"You shouldn't feel that way, mom loved you as much as she loved me and Connor and she used to always baby you ... it was ridiculous I mean if we even looked at you wrong she'd punish us"

"A kid should have both parents in their life Ash" he said looking at Phinnigan trying to take the spoon away from his mother.

"Not necessarily" Ashley countered.

"He's gonna ask questions one dad about his dad or lack there of"

"John chose his path and I chose mine" Ashley said flatly not really wanting to discuss this topic.

"Look the way I see it is the minute you two signed those adoption papers you bound yourselves together for the sake of that baby and sure John's an ass but he's the only dad that little boy has and like it or not Phin is gonna need his dad in his life eventually" Keegan said "you can only do so much but a boy needs his dad to teach him about being a good man"

"I don't think I can do that Keegan, I don't want to put my son through any pain because his dad has different priorities"

"Just think about what I said ok" he stood up and kissed the top of her head "I'm going to bed"

"Night" she said.

Ashley took Phinnigan out of his high chair and gave him a bath. As she changed him into his pajamas. She took a few moments to take a good look at her little boy. He was growing so fast she felt like if she blinked he'd be 25. She sat him up and he lifted his little arms up so she could slide his shirt on over his head. She laughed because he had so much hair now but she remembered when he had been a bald new born. His hair went passed his ears, and somehow he seemed to have grown a set of emo bangs. Ashley thought his hair made him look very distinguished.

"So little guy do you think mommy made a mistake by leaving everything behind?" she asked him.

He looked at her with his pale green eyes and smiled showing her the few teeth he now sported. She kissed his forehead before picking him up and placing him in his crib.

"I only want what is best for you" she whispered while turning on his night light.

She sat around thinking about what Keegan had to say and she almost convinced herself that he was right. Phinnigan needed his father in his life and she was being a horrible mother by keeping them apart. She picked up her phone and dialed his number.

"_Hello"_ she heard him say.

But the minute she heard his voice she knew she wasn't ready for everything that involved John so she hung up the phone and went to bed herself. But before she did she made her final decision that Phinnigan was better off not having John in his life.


	12. Chapter 12

Title: Ride Of Your Life

Author: Adrian Jade

Summary: One day you wake up and realize that everything you thought mattered to you doesn't. John Cena has a girlfriend who he thinks he loves and a best friend who he knows he will always love. What happens when on a random pit stop to a Walmart they find something that could change all of their lives. John needs to choose where his heart belongs.

Disclaimer: I own all the people that you don't recognize. Everyone else own themselves and their characters belong to the WWE.

Chapter 12: Learning To Live Again

"You having fun baby boy" Ashley laughed as Phinnigan splashed bath water all around.

Phin giggled a little and continued to send water flying into the air. He loved any chance he got to make a mess. Ashley grabbed a cup full of warm water and rinsed his soapy hair clean.

"Mama" Phinnigan said.

Ashley sat there stunned for a few minutes. Phinnigan had just said his first word and it had been mama.

"Keegan, get in here!" she yelled.

Keegan, who had been tanning on the deck at the time, ran into the bathroom to see what was wrong. His heart was beating a mile a minute in a panicked state.

"What's the matter?" he asked with his hand over his chest.

"Phin go ahead show Uncle Keegan what you can do now" Ashley encouraged the toddler.

"Mama" Phinnigan said happily.

"Aww, Ash was that his first word?" Keegan asked.

"Yeah it was" Ashley was grinning from ear to ear by now.

"Good job little buddy" Keegan kneeled down so that he was level with Phinnigan "high five"

Phinnigan gave him a high five and then stood up and began swishing the water with his feet.

"Phin, sit down or you are gonna fall" Ashley warned him.

But he wasn't listening so Ashley scooped him up and wrapped a towel around his little body. Phinnigan whined a little and kept pointing to the tub.

"No Phin you didn't listen to me so now you are done with the tub for tonight" Phinnigan continued to whine.

Ashley got him dressed and put him in his stroller. She packed his diaper bag and grabbed her keys before pushing the stroller out the door. She walked with Phinnigan down the street to the little park by her house. They made a point to have a few hours of outside exercise if the weather permitted. Today was a very special day because they were going to be visiting with Randy and Dean. When Ashley got to the park Randy was just helping Dean out of the car.

"Auntie!" Dean exclaimed running to give Ashley a hug.

Ashley picked Dean up and spun him around in a circle. She then gave him a kiss on the forehead and set him back down on the ground.

"I missed you" Dean said.

"I missed you too baby" Ashley replied.

"Hey little guy" Randy said taking Phinnigan out of his stroller.

"Rans put you can put him down for a few minutes and let him walk" Ashley said.

"He can walk now?" Randy asked.

"Yeah but he really doesn't like to walk too much because he is spoiled and knows if he starts to whine I'll pick him up" she said more to Phinnigan than Randy.

Randy put Phinnigan down and both adults watched as he took a few steps. Dean took Phinnigan's hand and helped him walk into the park.

"I'll watch him for a little while" Dean said.

"Yeah and who is going to watch you?" Ashley asked.

"I don't need to be watched I'm practically all growed up" he said puffing out his chest a little.

Ashley couldn't help but laugh and Randy just rolled his eyes. He was used to Dean's little macho attitude by now.

"What's up with that?" Ashley asked as she and Randy had a seat on a nearby bench.

"I have no idea" Randy shook his head "he just started talking like that one day"

"I've missed you" Ashley threw her arms around Randy's neck.

They stayed that way for a few minutes and when they finally broke apart Ashley contented herself to resting her head on his shoulder. Ashley watched as Dean struggled to place Phinnigan in a swing.

"Dean … let me help you" she rushed over to the boys and helped Dean place Phinnigan in the swing.

Phinnigan giggled excitedly and waited for his favorite cousin to push him on the swing. Ashley walked back over to where she had been sitting before.

"What" she asked noticing the look Randy was giving her.

"There was no reason Dean couldn't have put Phinnigan in the swing by himself"

"I just didn't want him to get hurt" Ashley reasoned.

"I know but you need to let the boy grow up"

"Since when did you become the giver of parental wisdom?" Ashley asked.

"Since I know what I'm talking about … it's not easy raising a child these days but we learn as we go along"

"Riiiight" Ashley replied skeptically.

"Hey you wanna see my new ink?" Ashley asked pulling up her jeans so that Randy could see the tattoo that now occupied her right leg. There was a small set of foot prints that were outlined in black and colored in with blue. Underneath in beautifully done cursive it read Phinnigan William Joshua and underneath that was May 10, 2007, which was of course his birthday.

"Very nice" Randy said rolling up his own sleeve to show Ashley that he also had a tattoo for his son. On his left shoulder he had gotten Dean Andrew tattooed.

"I wish I could have been there when you got your tattoo done" Randy said.

"Yeah me too I would have liked to have held your hand while it was being done" Ashley said. She had 2 other tattoos both of which Randy had gone with her to get. The first tattoo she had ever gotten was of a Celtic cross in the middle of her back and her second was the Chinese symbol for love on the back of her neck.

"So how about we leave this place and you can show me and Dean around" Randy suggested.

"Sure if you want" Ashley agreed.

After a long day of sigh seeing Randy and Dean had to leave to go to a show that was being held that night. Randy desperately tried to convince Ashley to go but she still didn't feel that she was ready to see John. But it killed her not to be able to see her friends. She sighed as she got ready for work that night. Ashley currently had 3 jobs, not because she needed the money or anything just because it gave her something to do with her time. Monday through Friday during the day she worked at a day care which worked out perfectly because she got to take Phinnigan with her, so she was really killing two birds with one stone. On one hand she could keep Phinnigan close to her but he also had the freedom to interact with other children. On weekend nights Ashley worked as a bartender at a restaurant that a friend of hers owned and last but not least Ashley continued to work as a script writer for the WWE.

Tonight she was working at the bar. She was still kind of depressed about Randy and Dean leaving but it wasn't like she could never see them again. She just missed having her best friend around. She left her room and went in search of her brother and son. They were playing on the living room floor. Phinnigan was wearing his cowboy hat which he loved. For Halloween Ashley dressed Phinnigan up as a cowboy and Phinnigan had fallen in love with the hat and had insisted on wearing it whenever he could. Sometimes Ashley had to wait till he fell asleep to remove the hat because he would throw a fit otherwise.

"Ok you two be good while I'm gone" she told the boys.

"We always are" Keegan rolled his eyes.

"Phin needs to go to bed soon"

"Yes, ma I know" Keegan replied sarcastically.

"Come over here you little monkey and give your mommy a kiss" Phinnigan ran over to his mother and she scooped him up into her arms. After showering every part of his face with kisses she told him she loved him and handed him over to his uncle.

The bar was kinda quiet that particular night. Ashley sat around for most of the night not having anything to do. She was cleaning glasses when she heard someone have a seat at the bar. She turned around and a grin crossed her lips.

"Shane O' Mac, what brings you all the way out here?" Ashley asked happy to see a familiar face.

"I just stopped in for a drink … I had no idea you worked here" he replied.

"Anything you want is on the house" she said.

"That's mighty kind of you"

She grabbed two beers, one for him and one for herself. She took the seat next to him at the bar and was content on catching up.

"Steph told me about your divorce I'm sorry" she said.

"Don't be it's cool, me and Riss are still good friends and I get to see Declan and Kenyon any time I want"

"Well that's good" Ashley said.

"So how did you take the news of John and Kelly's engagement?" Shane asked.

Ashley's insides literally froze. She had no idea that they were engaged, how could Randy and her father for that matter keep that from her.

"Hey it's their life right" she said taking a swig of her beer "they deserve each other"

"I wouldn't go that far but I'm glad you got away when you did things are so much healthier for you and Phinnigan away from John"

"I just wish Phinnigan had a fatherly figure in his life" she found herself saying.

"Well I'll help out in any way I can"

"Really?" Ashley asked.

"What are friends for right I mean I know you would do the same thing for me and my boys"

"Yes I would"

They continued to catch up and have a few more beers. Shane was feeling more and more comfortable. He was never really a big drinker but he was having fun with this young woman.

"You know … Ash before I married Marissa I kinda had a little crush on you"

Ashley's jaw fell, there was no way Shane McMahon had just admitted to having a little crush on her.

"Really because I kinda had a little crush on you back in the day also" she blushed and hid a face for a few seconds.

Shane's face lit up at her admission.

"Why do you think I spent all that time with Stephanie when we were younger" she joked.

"Good point" he grinned.

"Hey my shift is over" Ashley said looking at her watch.

"I could give you a ride home if you'd like" Shane suggested hoping she would say yes.

"Sure"

Shane tried to hide it but he felt like a little kid at Christmas right now. You'd never know it under that cool McMahon reserve but he felt like a teenaged boy crushing over the most popular girl in school again.

They continued to talk about everything on the way back to Ashley's home. When they arrived Shane walked Ashley to her front door and they both lingered. Neither knowing what to do next.

"Well it's late and I should be going I have a plane to catch to Sydney tomorrow afternoon" Shane finally said.

"Hey Shane if you aren't busy tomorrow morning would you like to come back here and have breakfast with me and Phinnigan?" she asked him.

"It would be my honor to have breakfast with you"

Once again Ashley found herself blushing. Her whole body was on fire and for the first time in a really long time she didn't mind feeling that way. Shane leaned in and kissed her on the cheek.

"Until tomorrow" he said before walking back to his car.

Ashley waited for him to pull out of her driveway before going into her house. She couldn't help but giggle excitedly. She felt like running around crazily yelling at the top of her lungs but she didn't instead she hurried to her room and got ready to go to sleep.


	13. Chapter 13

_Title: Ride Of Your Life_

_Author: Adrian Jade_

_Summary: One day you wake up and realize that everything you thought mattered to you doesn't. John Cena has a girlfriend who he thinks he loves and a best friend who he knows he will always love. What happens when on a random pit stop to a Walmart they find something that could change all of their lives. John needs to choose where his heart belongs._

_Disclaimer: I own all the people that you don't recognize. Everyone else own themselves and their characters belong to the WWE._

_Chapter 13: With You_

Ashley had been up since 5:30 making everything presentable for when Shane arrived. She had even stopped by one of the early opening florists to pick up some exotic flowers to use as a centerpiece. The kitchen smelled of many different foods. Ashley wasn't sure what to cook so she made a little bit of everything. It was about 8:30 when Keegan walked into the kitchen holding a pajama clad Phinnigan.

"What's going on?" he asked.

"Nothing really we are just having a guest for breakfast" she replied putting a plate of scrambled eggs on the table.

"What's with all the food?" Keegan asked popping a grape into his mouth.

"I would appreciate if you would not molest my fruit salad" Ashley said "it's not often that we have guests with us for breakfast so why not go all out"

"Who's coming over?" Keegan gave his sister a look.

"If you must know Shane McMahon"

Keegan's blue eyes twinkled with amusement, he knew that Ashley had once had a crush on Shane and it would bring him so much pleasure to taunt her about it for a while.

"Sleeping with the boss's son … well that's one way to get a raise" Keegan couldn't stop himself from saying.

"First of all please put a shirt on and second please don't embarrass me while he is here" she begged her younger brother.

"Fine whatever" Keegan went to his room and came back out wearing a dark blue wife beater. Much to Ashley's annoyance he remained in his pajama pants and bare feet.

"Gee, Keegan you clean up so well" Ashley rolled her eyes.

He brushed his surfer hair out of his face and shot her a smile. All she could do was shake her head because Keegan had always been the one to test her limits. But she loved him none the less. She still remembered when he was a little baby, now he was 5'9 with a set of washboard abs and a charming smile.

There was a knock on the door, Ashley looked at Keegan pleading with him not to do anything that would embarrass her.

"I'll get it" he said in a sing song voice as he handed Phinnigan to her.

"Shane … it's always good to see you" Keegan said loud enough for Ashley to hear.

Keegan led Shane into the kitchen. Shane gave Ashley a warm smile the moment he saw her. Ashley swore she could feel butterflies in her stomach already.

"Good morning Ashley" Shane said "I picked this up on my way over, I figured it was too early for champagne so I settled for sparkling apple cider"

"Oh Ashley loves cider … don't you big sis" Keegan said.

Ashley shot Keegan a look that said she would kill him in his sleep if he didn't stop. He ignored her and had a seat at the table.

"Wow look how big Phin got" Shane said stepping closer to Ashley and the baby.

"Phin can you say hi to Shane"

Phinnigan decided to be shy at that very moment. He hid his face in the crook of his mother's neck.

"Give him about 10 minutes Shane and he'll be talking your ear off" Ashley assured him.

Ashley placed Phinnigan in his highchair and placed some scrambled eggs and half of a pancake on his tray. She also handed him his baby spoon and left him to eat his meal. He picked up his spoon and managed to get some egg into his mouth. Ashley had a seat next to Shane.

"I hope everyone enjoys all the food" she said helping herself to some of the fruit salad.

"I don't think I have ever seen so much food" Shane said amazed looking around at all the food Ashley had prepared. There was three different kinds of eggs, muffins, bagels and toast, pancakes, French toast, bacon, hash browns, Belgium waffles with a homemade strawberry sauce, fruit salad and oatmeal for Phinnigan.

"What can I say I like to cook" Ashley said smiling shyly.

"Hey we're not complaining right Shane" Keegan said taking another bite of his Belgium waffle.

"Believe me I haven't had a good home cooked meal in some time so anytime I get to eat real food I'm not going to complain"

"Anything I can do to help" their eyes met for a moment.

But it didn't last long because Phinnigan felt like he wanted to be the center of attention, he took his spoon and flicked some of his eggs at Shane. He began to laugh right after he threw it.

"Phinnigan William Joshua … you know better than to do that" Ashley scolded the toddler.

"I'm so sorry Shane" she apologized profusely.

Shane just laughed and wiped the egg off with his napkin "It's cool Ashley don't worry about it I have two boys so things like this aren't out of the ordinary for me"

"He still knows better and he's going to be punished as soon as breakfast is over"

"Please don't punish him on my account"

"Yeah Ash I mean he's just a baby he doesn't know better" Keegan added "besides like Shane said he has two boys"

Ashley just shook her head. Shane took her hand in his and rubbed the top of it with his thumb.

"Don't be mad at him" he said softly to her.

"I'm not … he just knows better than to behave like that at the table"

"You have to admit it was funny and man does that kid have awesome aim he hit me right in the face" Ashley cracked a smile.

Keegan watched his sister interact with Shane and couldn't help but think they were really cute together. Lord knows his sister could use a good man in her life and it seemed that Shane could be that man. Keegan took Phinnigan into his room to get him dressed and Ashley and Shane cleaned up.

"Breakfast was amazing" Shane said as he began the tedious task of drying dishes.

Ashley's kitchen radio was softly playing tunes while they worked. The song Breathe by Michelle Branch began to play. Ashley stopped what she was doing and turned to face Shane.

"Dance with me" she said.

"What … in your kitchen?" he asked.

"Yeah why not"

"Ok" he smiled taking her into his arms.

He spun her around and they both laughed. Keegan walked back into the room and watched as his sister and Shane made fools of themselves. He shook his head and smiled before leaving them to their privacy. They continued dancing for about another 10 minutes before going back to work on the dishes.

"You make me feel like a kid again Ash" Shane said

"And you Mr. McMahon make me feel whole once again" she admitted.

"What John did to you was horrible Ash" he said moving a stray piece of hair out of her face.

"How did you find out?" she asked.

"Randy told me right after you left … I wanted to call you then but I figured you needed time to process everything and then when I saw you last night I was just so happy to know you were ok"

"I survived" she replied "I'm not going to say I wasn't heartbroken because I was but I've learned to ignore the pain I feel for the sake of my son"

"You shouldn't feel pain at all" he said.

"Hey there Phinney" Ashley said taking notice to Phinnigan who had just walked into the room.

"Mama" he said motioning for her to pick him up.

She did walk over to him and pick him up. She then walked back over to Shane.

"Can you give Shane a high five?" she asked Phinnigan.

Shane held his hand out and Phinnigan gave him a high five.

"You have one hell of a swing little man" Shane massaged his palm a little.

"You should feel it when he gets mad and decides to punch you" Ashley said "I have never been a recipient but Keegan and Randy have a few times and they will tell you it kinda hurts"

"Like I always say boys will be boys"

"It's a beautiful morning … what do you say a little stroll along the shore line just the 3 of us" Ashley suggested.

"I'd like that"

"What about you baby?" Ashley asked kissing Phinnigan on his cheek. He smiled and stuck his fingers into his mouth.

"Keegan we're going out" she called to her brother.

"Ok have a good time" he called back to them.

"Shall we?" Shane asked extending his arm. Ashley happily took his arm and the two adults and the toddler walked out into the beautiful morning air. They all took off their shoes and walked barefoot in the surf. Both Ashley and Shane had a hold of one of Phinnigan's hands and were lightly swinging him by his arms as they walked.

"Phin really likes you" Ashley said.

"Well I really like him too … and his mom"

Ashley blushed a little "I like you too Shane"

"So what do you want to happen after today?" Shane asked.

The question caught her off guard, she hadn't really thought about what happened after today. She knew that Shane was asking her in a round about way if she would be interested in a relationship with him and the more she thought about it the more it appealed to her.

"I'm not sure … I know I want to see you again though"

"Well that's good because I want to see you again too"

"So it's a date then" she said.

"So would it be ok if I told the people at work that we are dating?" he asked trying to hide his excitement.

"Shane I would like nothing more than for you to tell the people we work with that we are dating" she responded.

"I know it's a little fast but … I don't know it just feels so right" Shane continued to ramble on, a habit which he had when he was either really excited or really nervous.

Ashley let go of Phinnigan's hand and placed both her hands on Shane's face and kissed him to shut him up.

He grinned back at her "You know you could have told me to stop talking"

"I could have but I thought kissing you would be more fun for me" she said and then she grabbed Phinnigan and took off running.

Shane just shook his head and chased after her. He was really going to like spending more time with her, he just knew it.


	14. Chapter 14

Title: Ride Of Your Life

Author: Adrian Jade

Summary: One day you wake up and realize that everything you thought mattered to you doesn't. John Cena has a girlfriend who he thinks he loves and a best friend who he knows he will always love. What happens when on a random pit stop to a Walmart they find something that could change all of their lives. John needs to choose where his heart belongs.

Disclaimer: I own all the people that you don't recognize. Everyone else own themselves and their characters belong to the WWE.

Chapter 14: The Shit is About to Hit The Fan

"Daddy my throat hurts" Dean complained in a raspy voice.

"I know buddy but there is really nothing we can do except to take the medicine the doctor's gave you" Randy said sympathetically.

Dean went to lay down as Randy took his laptop out of his bag. He set it on a nearby table and turned it on.

"Come on start you son of a …" he began to yell but stopped midsentence when he remembered Dean was still within hearing range.

Dean giggled "Daddy you need a new laptop cause you are always yelling at the one you have now"

"Yeah … Yeah" Randy grumbled.

"Finally … hey Dean, Auntie Ashley is online you want to talk to her for a few minutes before bed?" Randy asked.

"Yeah" Dean jumped up from where he was laying and went over and had a seat on his father's lap.

Randy turned on his webcam and he grinned when he saw his best friend sitting at her desk sending a text message.

"Is that text to me?"

"Jesus guys do you not want to scare me" Ashley said placing a hand over her heard because she had only just seconds ago realized that Randy and Dean sent her a video im.

"Hi Auntie" Dean said brightly.

"Hey sweetie I heard you didn't feel too good"

"Yeah my throat hurts" Dean whined massaging his burning throat.

"Strep?" She asked Randy.

"Yep"

"Damn I remember when I was a kid I had strep every other week" Ashley recalled.

"How did you get better Auntie?" Dean asked.

"I had an operation where the doctors removed my tonsils and I never had strep throat or even a sore throat ever again"

"Daddy, do I need to have an operation?" Dean asked fearfully.

"No you don't" Randy shot a glare at Ashley "it's time for bed now"

"Ok night" Dean said getting off of his father's lap.

"Wow, that was way too easy" Ashley remarked.

"It's because he doesn't feel good believe me it is never usually that easy"

"Daddy come tuck me in" both Ashley and Randy heard Dean yell.

"I'll be right back" he said walking away from the screen.

He came back about 10 minutes later. Ashley was still texting on her phone when he returned.

"Who are you running up your phone bill for?" he asked already knowing the answer.

"Shane" she replied.

"The $2,000 phone bill last month didn't faze you at all did it?" he asked.

"I have a texting plan now so it only costs me nine bucks for unlimited texts … best spent nine bucks of my life"

"I have some kinda sad but also kinda good news" Randy said.

"How can news be kinda sad but kinda good?" Ashley asked.

"Well it's good because when you hear it you'll feel a little bit vindicated but it's sad because it involves someone very close to us"

"… umm ok" was her reply as she continued to text.

"Anyways I can tell you are dying to hear what I have to say" he rolled his eyes "Kelly had a miscarriage a few weeks ago"

Ashley looked up from her phone. She didn't say anything right away because she wanted to phrase the right things to say in her mind before she said them out loud. But nothing came to her at all.

"Sucks to be her" she said not really caring.

"I thought you might show a little bit more concern for John than that" Randy said a little appalled at her response.

"What did you really expect of me Randy?" she asked "did you expect me to get all weepy eyed and vow to come all the way back to the states to comfort him?"

"No … but you could at least pretend to care" he replied.

"I could pretend to care but that would be a lie and I just don't feel like lying right now, I honestly don't care about John or Kelly anymore and they can both rot in hell for all I care … I love my new life with Shane and I'm not going to drag myself or Shane or even Phinnigan through all that pain and heartache again"

"John and Kelly are both adults and what they do is none of my concern" she added.

"I gotta go" he signed off without even saying goodbye.

The next day Randy was still blown away by Ashley's response last night. He couldn't really understand why Ashley was acting like this. Sure John had been a huge jackass and broke her heart but Randy just couldn't help but shiver at the thought that Ashley no longer had any warm feelings towards John at all. He made his way to John's locker room. The door was open just a little bit and he was about to walk in when he heard Kelly and Melina talking.

"Lina, I have to tell you a big secret that I haven't told anyone else" Randy heard Kelly say.

He was about to turn away until he heard Kelly mention a secret. For some reason his legs wouldn't move. He wasn't sure why he was so interested in Kelly's secret but he was.

"It's about the baby" Kelly said.

"What about the baby?" Melina asked.

"There never was one I just told John I was pregnant because I wanted Ashley and her brat out of our lives forever" Kelly admitted.

"Wow … that's just so … wow" was all Melina could say.

"I know it was extremely cruel of me to string John along like that but I needed to get rid of Ashley so I could have John all to myself" Kelly explained.

"Well I guess it worked" Melina said.

"Even better than I thought it was going to and now John and I are engaged" Kelly practically squealed.

"Don't you feel bad for tricking John into proposing to you?" Melina asked.

"I did at first but I mean we have our whole lives to have children right"

"What about the son John already has don't you think it's a little unfair to keep him away from his son?"

"That kid isn't his son, he's just some charity case that John felt bad for and if you ask me he's better off without him"

"Sure Kel whatever you say" Melina said unsurely.

"Oh shit I got to let Ashley know about this" Randy whispered to himself "and then I have to break it to John … poor guy"


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15: She Knows

Ashley sighed as she had a seat on her couch. Her pair of hip hugging American Eagle lounge pants swished as she curled her legs so she was sitting cross legged. She began to unwind after a particularly hard day with Phinnigan. He had some new teeth coming in so he was whiny and uncooperative all day. She was so relieved when he finally fell asleep. Keegan was spending the night at one of his many friends that he had met while staying with her. He didn't know it yet but Ashley and her father had discussed it and they had come to the decision that if Keegan wanted he could start going to school in Australia instead of going back to Georgia. Chris felt that Keegan needed the stability of having someone to go home to everyday instead of traveling between Chris's sister and his parents and staying with his dad a few days each month. He also felt good knowing that Ashley wasn't alone out there in Australia, she had Keegan and Shane to keep her safe. Chris was very weary about the McMahon heir dating his daughter but Shane seemed to make his daughter and grandson very happy and that is all he really wanted for both of them.

It was beginning to rain out and the forecasts predicted heavy rain storms for the next few days. Ashley grabbed the remote control for her TV and began flipping through channels trying to find something interesting to watch. Love Comes Softly, which was one of Ashley's favorite made for TV movies just happened to be on. Although Ashley had seen the movie many times before she loved it none the less. The movie was made from a Christian book series that Ashley had read as a teenager. She called Keegan to make sure he was ok and then settled in to watch the movie. She fell asleep on the couch halfway through the movie. The rain was coming down really hard now and the drops smashed into the roof with a furious force. Ashley was awoken by a loud knocking on her door. She looked around for a minute disoriented until she realized where the sound was coming from. There was another knock and Ashley got up off the couch and threw a sweatshirt over her thin spaghetti strapped tank top before answering the door.

She was shocked when she opened the door and saw a soaked to the bone Randy with Dean asleep on his shoulder. Ashley let them in and as soon as Randy got into the house he removed Dean's wet clothing and carefully changed the little boy into pajamas.

"What are you doing here?" she asked him once he had put Dean into the extra bed in Phinnigan's room.

"Can't a man come and visit his best friend without having some other motive" he countered taking off his own shirt and rummaging through the bag he had brought with him. He pulled a black long sleeved thermal shirt on over his head. Ashley went to grab him a towel for his hair and when she had returned he was now wearing a pair of dark blue and black flannel pajama pants.

"Here" she said handing him the towel. He ran in through his now thick and bushy head of hair. (A/N: Think of what his hair looked like when he first joined Evolution)

"Thanks" he said.

"I didn't mean it like I wasn't happy you were here it was just a surprise" Ashley said.

"I asked Vince for a few days off and couldn't think of anywhere else to spend it but with my best friend and godson" he explained.

"It's just that I thought you were mad at me about the way I reacted about the whole John and Kelly thing"

"I was never mad I was just surprised ... but then again I didn't even take into consideration of your feelings, I know Kelly being pregnant was a big part of why you left and I didn't even think that talking about it might be uncomfortable for you" he said "I even brought you a peace offering"

"What did you get me?" Ashley asked excitedly, her grey eyes brightened immediately.

Randy once again went over to his duffel bag and began to search through it. He grinned to himself as he pulled out a beautiful light blue teddy bear dressed in a Red Sox uniform. He had that in one hand and a rolled up birth certificate in the other.

"Dean decided that we should go to Build A Bear to get you a present and since you love the color blue he picked this out for you and he even remembered that your favorite baseball team is the Red Sox"

"I knew that boy was so smart" Ashley broadly smiled as she took the bear and the birth certificate from Randy.

Both Orton men had decided to name the bear Nomar after Ashley's favorite former Red Sox player.

"You guys know me too well" she said placing the bear in a special place so he wouldn't get ruined by her almost 11 month old son. Phinnigan would be turning a year old in July and Ashley was already starting to plan his party.

"So Dean's birthday is next month are you going to come out of seclusion long enough to attend?" he asked.

"Of course me and Phin will be there and so will Shane and the boys" Ashley replied.

"How are Declan and Kenyon taking to having you and Phinnigan around?" Randy asked.

"They seem to be fine with it ... Declan seems to have really taken a liking to both me and Phin and Kenny is still kinda young but he loves to play with Phinnigan"

"That's really good" Randy said.

"Shane told me that Declan asked him if me and Shane were going to get married and then he told Shane that if we did he'd be ok with that" Ashley laughed a little.

"Wow ... I guess he has really taken a liking to you" Randy laughed as well.

"So have you and Shane discussed marriage?"

"We have only been dating for a little over a month I don't think there is any need to rush into anything" she replied "but I will say this if Shane did ask me in the future I'd really consider it"

"Yeah but would you really want to be a McMahon? Randy asked "I mean Shane and Stephanie and Linda are ok but would you really want to be related to Vince McMahon?"

"Now that you put it that way ..." Ashley started to say but her phone interrupted .

"I gotta go grab that" she said excusing herself.

"You have to tell her now" Randy urged himself "she needs to know"

"Needs to know what?" Ashley asked walking back into the room with the phone in her hand.

"Ashley sweetie you know I am always straight with you and never have I ever not told you the truth even though sometimes I wish I did to protect you" he said getting up to hug her.

"Oh my god Randy are you cheating on me" she joked.

"Come on Ash this is serious what I am about to tell you is going to piss you off beyond belief" he warned her.

She took a deep breath and looked him in the eyes "Ok I'm ready"

"Well here goes nothing ... I overheard Kelly and Melina talking the other day and Kelly told Melina that she concocted the whole "pregnancy" thing up and that she was never really pregnant and the only reason she told John she was pregnant was that she knew it was the one thing you could never give him and she wanted to hit you with a low blow so hard that you couldn't take being around anymore and you would leave so she could have John all to herself and it worked ... you fell right into her plan"

The blood rushed from Ashley's face as he hands clenched to fists so hard that her knuckles were white. She looked like she was going to be sick. Her normally tranquil eyes filled with hate and rage and she just stood there not saying a word.

"I'm going to bed before I hurt something or someone" she finally said after 5 minutes.

"Ash come on talk to me" Randy urged her.

"I'm ok now ... thank you for telling me the truth"

"Good night then" was all Randy could say.

Randy and Dean spent a total of 3 days in Australia before having to go back to the states. They never mentioned Kelly or John at all after the bombshell had been dropped. As they were saying their goodbyes Ashley embraced Randy tightly.

"Kelly is going to pay" she whispered into his ear.

"Have a safe flight guys" Ashley had a smile on her face but Randy could still see the rage in her eyes.

What had he just done ... hopefully Kelly survived what Ashley was going to do with her.

A/N: She knows ... how is she going to take it. So on this day of my birth December 16, 2007 I give to you a gift of an update and if I don't kill my brother or myself in the next hour or so I might update again later on today.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16: Hospitals, Bloodshed, and Baseball Bats

Randy Orton kept his ear close to the grapevine waiting to hear of Kelly being attacked by Ashley but after about a month nothing had happened. Dean seemed to be sick every other week now and Randy was always worried. It was a week after Phinnigan's huge 1st birthday extravaganza. Dean had come down with a really high fever and had to rushed to the hospital. The doctors told Randy that they would need to remove Dean's tonsils immediately and that would be the only way to stop him from being so sick all the time.

"Hello" a very groggy Ashley picked up the phone.

"_Ash, it's me Dean is in the hospital and they need to take his tonsils out and I'm freaking out right now ... my little boy has never had an operation before and now he's just so sick ... I need you"_ Randy was near tears by now.

"Where are you?" Ashley asked fully awake by now. She was currently staying with Shane at his home in New York City. She carefully removed his arm from around her waist and went into the other room as not to disturb him.

"_I'm in Long Island"_ he replied.

"Good I'm staying at Shane's place in the city so I'll wake him up and we'll meet you at the hospital as soon as we can" Ashley told him.

"_Ok"_ he said running a hand over his tired face.

"Randy everything is going to be ok" she reminded him.

"Baby what's the matter?" Shane asked when Ashley returned to the bedroom "I felt you get out of bed and I got worried is everything ok?"

"Dean is really sick we need to get to Long Island right now" Ashley informed him grabbing some clothes to put on.

Shane sighed as he got up and pulled a pair of gray sweatpants over his bare legs. He knew Ashley was worried and he also knew that Randy must be a wreak, he knew he would be if it were either of his boys. But the selfish side of him couldn't help but want to get back into bed and snuggle up with his significant other again.

"Well Raw is in Long Island tomorrow and that's about 90 minutes from here with no traffic" Shane said.

"Let's make a quick check on the boy and we'll let your nanny know where we are going and then we'll leave" Ashley said.

They both went and checked on all 3 boys who were all sleeping peacefully then Ashley went to wake up Shane's live-in nanny Leticia to let her know they had to leave. Shane had the car all started and warmed up when she got in. Although it was summer in New York it was rainy that early morning making them temperature only in the mid 40's.

"I appreciate you coming with me" she said to Shane after about 15 minutes of driving.

"I wasn't about to let you drive to Long Island by yourself at this hour" he replied "besides I care about Randy and Dean too"

"You are amazing Shane McMahon ... just amazing"

Shane smiled at her and brought her hand to his lips.

"I love you" Shane said for the very first time. Ashley smiled at him and replied that she loved him too. So it was official she was finally over John and she couldn't be happier about it.

They spent the rest of the ride just chatting about different things that they had going on in their lives. Shane didn't even have a chance to park the car before Ashley jumped out and sprinted into the hospital. Randy was pacing in the waiting room when Ashley found him.

"Rans" he looked up and she immediately went to hug him.

"Thank the lord you made it I was going crazy" he said so relieved his best friend was here during the scariest night of his life.

"Dean is going to be ok Randy ... a tonsillectomy is a pretty common procedure nowadays" Ashley told him.

"I know that but my little boy is having a piece of his body removed and it scares me" Randy admitted "I keep thinking of everything that could go wrong"

Ashley patted Randy's back and gave him another hug.

"The mark of a true parent" she said proudly. He had grown so much in such a short time, both Randy and Dean were very lucky to have each other.

"Sorry it took me so long I got a phone call from my dad" Shane said joining them in the waiting room.

"Thanks for coming man" Randy said shaking Shane's hand.

"What are friends for right" Shane offered Randy a smile.

They all sat down to wait, as Ashley sat in the uncomfortable plastic hospital chair she couldn't help but think that Kelly was somewhere in that town. Ashley grinned at the thoughts of what she wanted to do to Kelly, to send a message to her. The urges were finally to hard to resist after about an hour.

"Rans, do you have your own car here or are you using a rental?" Ashley asked.

"I have my car ... why?"

"Do you still have Dean's baseball equipment in your trunk?" Ashley asked trying not to sound too interested. She pretended to pick at her perfectly manicured nails while she waited for him to reply.

"Yeah" Randy replied unsurely. He didn't like where this conversation was going already.

"Give me your keys I have an errand to run" Ashley commanded holding out her hand.

"Why not use Shane's car?" Randy asked in no hurry to give up his keys.

"Do you trust me?" Ashley asked still holding her hand out.

"Yes" Randy said.

"Then have a little faith in me and give me your keys" She ordered "I'll be back before Dean wakes up I promise"

He reluctantly handed his keys to his best friend and watched her as she left the waiting room. He walked over to the window looking over the parking lot and watched as she climbed into his H2 and drove away.

"Please don't do anything stupid" he whispered.

"Where's Ashley?" Shane asked walking back into the room with coffee.

"She had something to do she'll be back soon" Randy told him.

"Oh Lord this can't be good" Shane said.

"Knowing her you are probably right" Randy agreed taking a coffee from Shane's hand.

She wasn't sure what she was going to do when she and Kelly were in the same place but she knew she wanted to hurt Kelly. The rage was had now risen inside of her and she swore it was threatening to scorch her throat. She wanted to vomit but she forced the sickness back so could keep her head clear long enough to do what she had to do. Her hands were shaking and the anger she felt inside of her scared her. She pulled out her cell phone and gave Stephanie a call. It was almost 1:30 in the morning and she doubted that her best friend or her husband would be asleep yet.

"_Yes ... how may I help you"_ was the greeting Ashley got from Stephanie.

"What hotel are you in ... cause I'm here in town with Shane and I wanted to stop by after I took care of some business"

Stephanie was worried by the tone of Ashley's voice. But she chose not to bring it up.

"_The whole company is in The Hilton on the corner of Grant Ave and Main"_ Stephanie answered.

"Ok well I'm down the street I'll see you soon" Ashley said hanging up the phone.

Ashley parked in the parking lot and grabbed Dean's metal bat from the trunk. She took a few practice swings before heading into the hotel. A woman in her mid 40's was sitting behind the desk. Ashley gave her a smile as she walked up to the desk.

"May I help you?" the woman asked eying the bat and then the young woman before her.

"I need Kelly Martin's room please ... she works for the WWE" Ashley responded.

"Why do you want Ms. Martin's room number?" the woman asked.

"Chill I'm not some fan ok I work with her I'm a script writer for the company and I need some last minute input on Ms. Martin's new character change before we start the new storyline tomorrow" Ashley said throwing her WWE ID at the woman.

"Room 526" the woman replied coldly.

"Thank you and have a good night" Ashley grabbed her ID and walked over to the elevators.

As the elevator slowly climbed the 5 floors Ashley's mind was going insane inside her skull. All these ideas were screaming at her and the more she tried to rid herself of the ideas the louder they seemed to become.

3 more floors ... two more floors ... one more floor ... ding. The elevator doors opened and out she stepped. Ashley couldn't help but think of all the horror movies she had watched over the years. She could have sworn that the hall lights flickered.

"_You don't have to do this"_ her conscience screamed at her. But she ignored it as she ventured further down the hallway. She didn't even stop to think what if John was in the room with Kelly, her need for revenge blinded her. A giddy feeling overcame her as she neared Kelly's room. With sweat drowned palms she knocked on the door and waited patiently for Kelly to answer. Her wait wasn't anymore than 2 or 3 minutes. Kelly opened the door and the smile she had warn vanished and all the blood drained from her face. Ashley juggled the bat from one hand to the other and grinned sadistically at Kelly. As the blonde backed away from the door Ashley entered the room.

"P...please don't hurt me" Kelly begged.

"What makes you think I'm going to hurt you?" Ashley asked in a sickly sweet tone. Then she looked at her right hand which now wielded the metal bat.

"Kelly ... Kelly ... Kelly, I'm not going to hit you with this bat" Kelly exhaled in relief after hearing this.

She barely had time to blink before Ashley 's fist connected with her face. The punch sent her reeling to the ground. She slowly tried to crawl away from Ashley which pissed her off even more. With a few quick strides Ashley had caught up with her and she brought the bat down hard on Kelly's left hand. Both women could hear all the bones shattering. Kelly howled in pain and Ashley could see tears leaving her hazel eyes.

"I never said I wasn't going to hit you ... I just said I wasn't going to hit you with the bat and I didn't did I" Ashley taunted Kelly

"Now if you didn't try to run away from me then your hand would still be in working order" Ashley said.

"What do you want?" Kelly asked fearfully.

"What you don't want to be friends anymore Kelly ... I mean seriously I just want to hear something from you"

"I don't owe you anything" Kelly spat.

Ashley brought the bat above her head and brought it crashing down upon Kelly's other hand. Kelly didn't bother to hide her pain, she cried openly now.

"Fine I lied to John about being pregnant to get you out of the picture ... are you happy now" Kelly hissed in pain.

"I'm sorry what was that ... can you speak a little louder?" Ashley asked taking a tape recorder out of the back pocket of her jeans.

"I lied to John about being pregnant to get you and your brat out of the way so I could finally have John all to myself once and for all" Kelly yelled.

Ashley turned the tape recorder off and stuck it back in her pocket. She took one last pitied look at Kelly before getting ready to leave.

"I hope this makes you think twice about doing something like this again Kel, because believe me there are some people out there who wouldn't be as nice about what went down as me" she smiled at her before turning to leave.

But at the last second she turned back around and brought the bat speeding towards Kelly's head. In a desperate attempt Kelly tried her best to bring her flailing arms up to her head in an attempt to save her head. Ashley brought the bat down so that it was about a half an inch away from her temple. Then she started to laugh.

"I wasn't going to really hit you stupid ... but it makes you think that one hard hit to the temple and you wouldn't be alive anymore ... kinda scary to think about huh?"

"Well goodbye hun" Ashley said "kisses and all that other bullshit you and your plastic friends like to say before you leave each other's presence"

"You are an evil bitch" Kelly spat venomously.

Ashley leaned down so that she was level with Kelly. Grey orbs met hazel ones in a one on one confrontation. "You have no idea".

With that she left but the moment she stepped closed the door behind her the adrenalin wore off and she really felt the need to vomit. She found the nearest trash receptical and emptied the contents of her stomach. After she made sure that there was nothing left in her stomach she got back carefully made her way back to Randy's car and drove. She stopped by Walgreens to pick some stuff up for Dean and for Randy. The cool night air nipped at her face but it made her feel a little better. Her hands were still shaking and although she was trying her best to remain calm she was loosing her cool and fast. She made it back to the hospital and back to the waiting room. Shane and Randy stood up when they saw her. She was shaking terribly by now and both men knew just by looking at her she was just seconds away from breaking down completely. Randy ushered her into one of the seats and took the seat next to her. Shane sat down on the other side of her. Both men eager to hear what she had done.

"Let me just ask you this is Kelly still alive?" Randy asked.

Ashley shot him a glare "Yes jerk she is"

"I don't understand Ash why did you feel you needed to attack her?" Shane asked.

"It's not for the reason you think Shane believe me this has nothing to do with John I swear" Ashley started "Randy told me that Kelly lied about the whole pregnancy thing and I got pissed because I felt like somehow she had control over me and it kept eating and eating away at me until tonight but then when I saw her I just lost it and I was just so scared at what I had done without even realizing it ... I could have easily have killed her because that is how out of control I was and I have only felt like that one other time in my life and it was when I was in the foster home and one of the kids called Keegan a name and I just kept punching this 15 year old boy in his face till they finally pulled me off of him and I swore right then and there that I would never get that out of control again but I did ... I just saw Kelly and my need for revenge just drove me to the brink and I let myself just beat the shit out of her" Ashley was still shaking pretty badly and there were a few tears falling down her cheeks.

"Everything is going to be ok Ashley, what's done is done let's just move on and pretend that tonight never happened" Shane kissed the top of her head.

"How's Dean?" Ashley asked after of few minutes of silent contemplation.

"They had to take out his adenoids and they were much larger than expected so there was some bleeding and they had to pack his throat with gauze and he has to remain here till sometime tomorrow night" Randy said glumly.

"They are taking him to recovery right now" Shane added "they'll let us see him soon"

Ashley rested her head on Shane's shoulder and she couldn't help but feel as long as he was there for her nothing bad could ever happen. It was funny because once upon a time she used to feel the same way about John.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17: Phinnigan and Shane Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus

Ashley and the boys decided to take a little trip to Time Square to get some Christmas shopping done. Not only was she taking care of Phinnigan and Dean but she also had Shane's two sons Declan and Kenyon.

"So boys what do you think I should buy Shane for Christmas?" she asked the two older ones.

"A Spiderman action figure" Dean suggested.

"Yeah Spiderman is awesome" Declan agreed whole heartedly.

"Sorry guys although Spiderman is a great idea I think Shane is a little too old for a Spiderman action figure"

"But we aren't" Dean had a huge grin plastered on his face.

"Nope, we are the perfect age for Spiderman" Declan added vigorously nodding.

"Well how can I say no to those faces" she kissed both boys cheeks.

"You can't" Dean's grin got even wider if that was possible.

Ashley rolled her eyes at the new tag team who was trying to extort her. Dean and Declan were close in age so they seemed to bond right away.

"Fine, all you guys can pick out one toy … and I mean only one toy" she told them.

She took a peek into the double stroller Shane had purchased for the two younger boys. Phinnigan and Kenyon were peacefully sleeping, she smiled because this is how she always pictured her life having a bunch of kids running around.

"I was thinking I'd get him a new watch since he keeps complaining that Kenyon flushed his old one down the toilet" she told the boys.

"Look auntie there's the toy store" Dean pointed excitedly at the Toys R Us that was situated on the corner of the street.

"Remember only one toy"

Ashley wore a mask of ashamed annoyance. She had been doped again, she still had no idea how she ended up spending $600 on 4 little boys.

"You boys are very lucky to have such a generous mom" the lady who had rung them out had said.

Ashley opened her mouth to correct the woman when Dean spoke for her.

"Yeah we are" he replied smiling happily at Ashley.

"Let's go you little monsters before you cost me any more money" she grumbled leading the boys out of the store.

"Thank you for the toys Ashley" Declan said.

"You're welcome sweetie"

Declan elbowed Dean in the arm "you're supposed to say thank you" he whispered.

"Oh yeah … thank you Auntie"

"Ashley when is Daddy coming home?" Declan asked.

"Well he's helping to entertain the soldiers in Iraq right now honey but he'll be home in a few days"

"My daddy is over there too" Dean beamed with pride as he talked about his dad "he's the champion"

"All you boys should be very proud of your dads because they are doing a wonderful thing for those brave men and women who don't get to see their families on Christmas"

"Daddy will be home for Christmas right?" Declan asked.

"Of course, you know how much your dad loves to see you and your brother open all your gifts"

They continued shopping for a little while and when they got back home Ashley and Dean and Declan began decorating Shane's house with all things Christmas. Two days passed and Ashley and the boys waited patiently to see Randy and Shane again.

"I see the plane" Dean shouted as the huge Military cargo plane landed smoothly on the ground.

Ashley stood up and smoothed out her cream turtle neck sweater before taking Phinnigan into her arms. Both Phinnigan and Kenyon seemed to know something was going on because both boys babbled excitedly to each other. Every once in a while she heard one of the boys say Dada. Both Declan and Dean grabbed Kenyon's hand and they all walked out to greet their loved ones. Some of the other wrestling families were waiting as well. As Ashley scanned the now crowded runway she could see Chavo Guerrero's wife with their two boys Adam and Nicholas and also Chris Jericho's wife Jessica with Ash and the twins Sierra and Cheyenne. Little children ran around everywhere. As the huge metal doors of the plane opened everything seemed to stop. Wives and girlfriend's waited on baited breath to see the men they loved walk off that plane safe and unharmed. Although it was an amazing thing the wrestlers were doing there was nothing worse than waiting and worrying that something was going to happen to them in such dangerous territories. Kenyon became a little nervous of the plane, he let go of his brother's and Dean's hands and walked over to Ashley. Ashley picked him up using her one free arm so she now held both toddlers, who just stared in wonder of the huge airplane in front of them. People began to filter out of the plane. One of the first few people were Randy and his girlfriend Courtney.

"Daddy" Dean yelled excitedly running to meet his father.

Randy dropped his bags and bent down to scoop his little boy into his arms before he showered him with kisses. Then he handed Dean over to Courtney who did the same thing. Ashley was happy to see Dean happy, she knew he missed his dad terribly that whole week. She exhaled a shaky breath, she still hadn't seen Shane yet. Finally he did emerge from the plane and smiled at his make shift family. She put Kenyon down and both of Shane's boy ran to greet their dad. Much like Randy he took the boys into his arms and just held them there. Then he walked over to her and Phinnigan with both boys still in his arms.

"I missed you" he said when he reached his girlfriend "both of you"

"We missed you too … haven't we Phin" she kissed her son's cheek.

"Sane" Phinnigan said.

"Did he just try to say Shane?" Shane asked.

"Yep, he's been saying your name all week I think that was his way of asking for you" Ashley beamed at her son.

"Daddy can me and Dean go play with the other kids for a little while?" Declan asked.

"Sure you can buddy but only for a couple of minutes because we have to be heading home soon"

"Ok daddy" Declan said before taking off with Dean.

"Those two have been inseparable since Dean has been staying with us" Ashley informed her boyfriend.

"Well it's good that they both have a friend who knows the lifestyle" Shane said watching the two boys playing with some of the other kids.

"I've been thinking we should start a little daycare thing maybe even preschool and tutoring for the older kids" Ashley said "I know Randy is going to be able to part with Dean when he starts school next year and wrestlers miss so much of their kid's lives why not make it a little easier for them to have their kids around"

"That is a great idea sweetie I promise to talk to my dad about it"

"Speaking of your dad he is coming over this way" Ashley said.

"Afternoon Ashley … Shane" he greeted them "I was wondering if I could talk to Ashley for a moment or two"

Ashley and Shane exchanged worried glances. They had been lucky that Kelly hadn't pressed charges on Ashley but that still didn't mean there weren't going to be some repercussions.

"Sure Vince" Ashley said handing Phinnigan to Shane.

"What do you need to talk to me about?" she asked once they were out of Shane's range of hearing.

"My niece Kelly has taken a permanent leave of absence and I was wondering if you knew anything about it" Vince questioned.

"I'm sorry Mr. McMahon I have no idea why Kelly left" she said.

"I think that ass kicking session you gave her really scared her off" he said.

"I'm sorry Vince I have no idea …" she started but Vince cut her off.

"Don't worry your secret is safe with me … Kelly has always been very manipulative ever since she was a child and it is about time someone put that spoiled brat in her place" he cracked a smile.

"So you aren't mad?" she asked surprised.

"Are you kidding me grateful is more what I am now I don't have to listen to her whine anymore"

"Why hire her in the first place if you couldn't stand her?" Ashley asked.

"As a favor to my brother and sister-in-law" he said.

"I pity you having to be related to her" Ashley momentarily shuddered.

"All I'm trying to say is now that Kelly is gone if you want to continue traveling with us you are more than welcome to" he offered.

"I'll think about it … but for right now I am enjoying my time raising my little boy but there is something I'd like to pitch to you that might make everyone a lot happier" she explained to him her whole child care idea.

"Ashley that is a wonderful idea and I am putting you completely in charge of it" he said.

"Me … Vince … are you sure?" she asked amazed that Vince would trust her that much.

"Shane trusts you and I trust my son's instincts" he said.

"Well then I have so much to do then" she got a little too excited and actually hugged Vince McMahon before running off to find Shane.

But Shane didn't seem as happy at Ashley did at that moment.

"Randy we have to find him man … if Ashley finds out I let her son wonder off she'll kill me"

"We are doing the best we can and Court said she'd buy us a few minutes" Randy said as he and Shane raced around the crowded air strip.

Phinnigan didn't seem bothered at all that he could no longer see the adults that were supposed to be watching him. He was too interested in exploring the huge air strip. He kept walking until he collided into a pair of strong legs. He was knocked onto his rear end as he stared up at the man he ran into.

"Hey there little buddy you should be more careful" John said picking the young boy up.

It wasn't until he got a good look at the boy's face did he realize he was holding his son. He had no idea what to do … so many things ran through his mind.

"Wow … Phinnigan look how big you got" he said hugging his son.

Phinnigan had no idea who this strange man who was hugging him was but even now he wasn't afraid.

"I've missed you so much" John said. Which was the truth he had missed his son so much more than he ever thought he would.

Phinnigan just laughed at him and tried to take the hat John was wearing off his head. He succeeded and placed the hat on his own head.

"Looks better on you anyways" he said pulling the hat down over Phinnigan's eyes.

Phinnigan grunted his disapproval and fixed the hat on his head. John laughed at how cute his little boy was.

"What are you doing with him Cena?" Shane asked seeing John with Phinnigan.

"He found me" John replied holding his son tighter to his chest. Now that he had found his son he was not going to give him up.

"Please John don't make this harder than it has to be" Randy pleaded with his best friend to return the boy.

"No man I haven't seen my son in almost a year and now that I have him why should I give him back"

"Because Ashley doesn't need to be upset" Randy said.

"Something can be worked out after the holidays please John don't hurt Ashley like this" Shane also tried to reason with him. But it was a half hearted argument because he sympathized with John, if Marissa took his boys away from him he wouldn't be happy either.

"What about the way she hurt me and my family by taking Phinnigan away from us" John snapped.

"John do you love Ashley?" Randy asked.

"What kind of question is that … you know I do" he replied.

"Then don't take her son away from her … both me and Shane will talk to her and see what we can do about you being able to spend time with your son but please don't do this right now man" Randy pleaded with his best friend.

"I'm so sorry" John said finally realizing what he was doing. He kissed the top of his son's head. "Daddy will you see you soon I promise"

He handed Phinnigan over to Randy and watched as they walked away. He knew he had done the right thing but now that he had seen his son again there was no way he was letting him out of his life again.

"Hey baby where did you 3 go?" Ashley asked giving Shane a kiss.

"We just walked around a little" Shane managed to get out.

"Yep, you know us guys standing in one place for too long makes us antsy" Randy added.

Ashley gave Randy a look that said she didn't believe him.

"So we should be heading out" Randy said "Christmas is in a few days and I don't know about you folks but I haven't finished my shopping"

"Rans … are you ok?" Ashley asked.

"Yep never better" Randy replied.

"Randy is right sweetie we should be leaving we have a long drive ahead of us" Shane reasoned.

"Phinney baby where did you get your hat?" Ashley asked her son.

Both Randy and Shane wanted to mentally kick themselves for not taking the hat of Phinnigan's head. Phinnigan pointed his little finger over Shane's shoulder but luckily for both Randy and Shane he was just simply pointing to the plane. Phinnigan held his hands out to Randy and Shane passed the toddler over to his uncle.

"It's so good to have you back" Ashley hugged Shane. She had her eyes closed for a few seconds and when she opened them again she found herself staring into John's blue orbs from across the runway. He gave her a weak smile and a wave before walking away.

Shane was in the drivers seat while Ashley sat next to him in the passengers seat, her head rested against the the seat and her eyes were closed.

"Ash, honey can I talk to you about something?" Shane asked.

"Go for it" she replied sleepily. She lazily opened one eye to look at him.

"Don't bite my head off please this is just an idea but ... I think after the holidays we could think about maybe letting Phinnigan spend some time with John"

She opened her other eye and looked at him like he had 3 heads. Shane stole a glance at her and swallowed hard.

"He hasn't been the same since you and Phinnigan left and it's not like I'm telling you that you have to take him back or that you even have to like him ... it's just I know how I would feel if Rissa tried to take away my boys ... I wouldn't be able to live without them"

"Why is this coming up all of a sudden?" she asked fully alert by now.

"Phinnigan wondered away from me and Randy and John found him" Shane told her.

"You let my son wander away" she wanted to scream at him but all 3 boys were asleep in the back seat.

"It was an accident Ash ... one minute he was standing with Kenyon just watching the kids play and the next moment he was gone and then when I found him with John and I saw the look in John's eyes I knew how much it must be killing him not to see his son"

"So are you telling me I was in the wrong to take Phin away?" Ashley asked.

"No, I applaud you for taking your son out of an unhealthy situation with Kelly but John loves his son and I think it could be good for both him and Phinnigan to spend a little time together ... if you don't feel comfortable with John being alone with him we can have Randy with them or something like that but I think Phinnigan needs his dad"

"I don't want to discuss this right now" she said.

"Ash ..."

"Listen I'll think about it alright but I don't want to talk about it right now" she stated.

He just rolled his eyes and bit his tongue this was the first major fight they had ever had. But he felt he was right ... he felt that a child's father should have the right to see his child whenever he wanted unless the man was a danger to the child which John certainly was not. They didn't speak for the rest of the car ride and when they finally did get back to Shane's house Ashley busied herself with the boys so she wouldn't have to talk to Shane. Finally when all the boys were tucked into bed Shane tried once again.

"John is a good man Ash" he said.

"So date him" was Ashley's reply.

"All I am asking is to consider it"

"Shane, do not take this the wrong way because I love you and it kills me that we are fighting right now but do I tell you how to raise your boys ... no I don't because I trust you and I know you would do anything to keep Declan and Kenyon safe and healthy but when you throw this all at me it makes me feel like you are doubting my parenting abilities" she explained.

"That isn't what I am trying to do Ash not at all it's just I saw how happy John looked to see Phin again and I couldn't help but feel for the guy" Shane said "you are an amazing mother and I trust in your parental abilities completely but please just think about letting Phinnigan spend some time with his dad"

"Fine I'll think about it" she huffed.

Shane grinned at her. Relieved that their first fight was over.

"What are you grinning about?" she asked.

"Well we had our first fight now we need to make up"

She just laughed at him and shook her head "You are too much you crazy man"

"I'm only crazy because I love you so much"

"I love you too Shane with everything I have" she said kissing him softly.

"I was thinking that maybe if you and Phinnigan wanted to ..." Shane started "what I mean to say is ..."

"Jesus man spit it out already"

"Move in with me"

"We would love to but I'm not having any of our boys being raised in the city so what do you say we relocate to Jersey" she suggested.

"Ashley have you ever thought about adopting again?" Shane asked out of the blue.

She looked at him funny "Don't tell me you want us to adopt a child too because that would be way to fast in the whole relationship scheme"

"No ... no nothing like that right now I was just wondering" he said.

"I'd love for Phin to have siblings but right now he needs to much so I want to wait for him to be a little older" she explained "although my father is no help with his constant pestering about wanting a granddaughter to spoil"

Shane laughed "He still won't give up on that?"

"No, I swear he thinks adopting a child is like going to the supermarket" she over embellished.

It was Christmas Eve now and Chris and Connor had flown in to help celebrate Shane and Ashley's first Christmas.

"Yeah Randy we have it all planned out I'm going to be playing Santa for Phinnigan and Dean" Shane said with mild excitement. He only wished his boys could see him play Santa but they were spending Christmas day with their mom.

Shane was doing so very urgent last minute shopping as well as picking up his Santa suit rental. He strolled down the streets casually sipping his latte and talking to Randy on the phone.

"_So what did you get Ashley for Christmas?"_ Randy asked .

"I found this amazing diamond pendent in one of the little shops in the East Village so I bought that for her and I also got her a guitar which I had signed by the entire E Street Band" Shane smiled at what he imagined would be her reaction to the guitar.

"Dude that's awesome you know how much she loves Springsteen" he said.

"You know that fool is actually looking for houses in Asbury Park" Shane said with a sigh.

"_All the more power to her I've learned not to mess with her Springsteen infatuation"_ Randy retorted.

"Well man I'll see ya in a few"

"_Ok talk to you then"_

Shane returned home about 2 hours later and as soon as he entered the house wonderful smelling aromas filled his nose. Declan and Dean ran to greet him. Both boys were covered in flour.

"What happened?" Shane asked not sure he wanted to know the answer to his question.

"We were helping make pies" Declan started

"But we ended up starting up a flour fight" Dean finished "so now we can't go anywhere near the kitchen"

"Boys go play before you get yourselves into more trouble"

The boys ran off to go play and Shane ventured into the kitchen. It was a mad house in there Ashley, his mother and sister and Randy's girlfriend Courtney and Chris's girlfriend Lilian.

"Hey baby" Shane greeted his girlfriend with a kiss.

"The men are all in the living room with the babies so take a hike" Stephanie told her brother.

"Mom, are you going to let her dismiss me from my own kitchen?" Shane asked.

"Move your butt boy" Linda agreed with her daughter.

"Fine" Shane pretended to be mad as he left.

True to her word all the men and Phinnigan and Kenyon were in the living room watching The Year Without a Santa Claus. Kenyon was sitting in Vince's lap and Chris had Phinnigan.

"Aww look at the two grandpas" Shane said.

Both Vince and Chris shot him a look saying shut up. He had a seat next to Connor on the couch and watched the movie with them. Phinnigan got down from Chris's lap and walked over to Shane and tried his best to climb up into his lap. Shane helped the toddler up and Phinnigan cuddled against Shane's chest. All the guys looked at Shane and smiled. They discussed everything from football to the business while they waited for the women to finish cooking dinner.

"I'm thinking we should give Jeff Hardy a bigger push" Shane said.

"I don't know Shane I mean that is taking a big risk the fans have been kinda iffy with him lately" Randy added his two cents.

"I think this could be good for him" Chris said.

"Me too" Vince finalized it.

"Guys enough business it's time to eat" Ashley announced "everyone to the dining room now"

The guys walked into the dining room and were overwhelmed with all the food that was spread out all over the table.

"Damn you guys" was all Randy could say.

"Get that many women in one kitchen and you are bound to get tons of food" Shane whispered to his father who nodded in agreement.

Dinner was eaten and everyone was passed out in the family room. Everyone except Shane who had to leave to take the boys back to Marissa's house. Ashley looked out the window.

"Look Phinney it's snowing" Ashley held her son up to the window so he could see the snow falling for the first time in his life. It started snowing really hard so Vince lit a fire and everyone sat around sharing stories. Randy's cellphone went off and he excused himself to answer it.

"Hello" he said answering the phone.

_"Hey it's me ... right now I'm stuck at Rissa's house cause it's snowing really bad up here"_ Shane said _"I don't think_ _I'll make it back in time to play Santa for the kids"_

"Well I can't do it cause Dean will notice I'm gone" Randy looked around to make sure no one would overhear him "I know someone who would do it but I don't think Ash would like it too much"

_"Call him"_ Shane told him.

"Alright dude I will" he hung up the phone and called John's number.

John agreed to play Santa without even having to think of it. He wanted to be there for his son on Christmas and what better way then to play Santa. He was just counting his blessings that he had decided to spend Christmas at his dad's house in Massachusetts and not his home in Tampa. He told Randy he'd be there in about 3 hours which would be perfect because the kids would just be getting ready to go to bed around then.

"Sane" Phinnigan kept saying as he looked around for Shane.

"Baby he went to go take Declan and Kenyon home" Ashley explained to him.

"Oh" he replied "otay mama"

He went over and played with his trucks. Aurora went over to join him, at first he didn't want her to play with his trucks but he eventually shared one of his toys with her and they played quietly by themselves.

"I miss Declan" Dean pouted.

"You'll see him again soon" Randy told him.

"I don't think anyone is going to leaving here tonight I'm afraid" Courtney said looking out the window at the snow which was falling down hard by now.

"I just hope Shane is ok" Ashley said also staring at the snow.

"He's a McMahon ... they can't die it's like against nature or something" Randy said.

Everyone looked at him funny. He just shrugged and returned his attention to his son who was drawing a picture for Declan. It was amazing how those two little boys had become best friends so fast. It was getting late and everyone was starting to get tired.

"Kids it's bedtime soon" Ashley said.

"Oh no mama" Phinnigan retorted.

"Oh yes baby"

There was a knock on the door and Randy got up to answer it.

"I wonder who that could be" Randy said.

"Oh Santa come on in" he said ushering "Santa" into the room.

"Ho Ho" Phinnigan laughed upon seeing Santa.

Ashley walked over to him and gave him a relieved hug.

"I'm glad you made it through the storm" she said to who she obviously thought was Shane.

The truth was she had been very nervous about Shane driving out in that snow storm. She wished he had stayed where he was until the storm had passed but she knew he promised to play Santa and he didn't want to disappoint the kids. She leaned in and kissed him without even thinking. Randy just stood there with his mouth open, he was the only one who knew who Ashley really was kissing.

"What the hell" Ashley broke away from who she thought was Shane to see Shane standing the the door way with snow all over him.

"Shane... if you are there then who is he" she pulled off his beard and was shocked.

"... John"

A/N: I apologize for taking so long with this chapter I started writing it 2 days before Christmas with every intention of having it done by Christmas Eve or Christmas day at the latest. But things with Christmas kept me away from my computer. Then the day after Christmas we had to put Rosie, the dog I had since I was 11 to sleep and then 2 days later I lost my job and to top that all off I got sick with a bad case of the flu which I am still recovering from. But I was determined to finish this chapter and I finally did. I will try to update as soon as I can probably sometime this week. Happy New Year to everyone.


	18. Chapter 18

_Chapter 18: Where Did I Go Wrong I Lost a Friend?_

_February 3, 2009 _

_Asbury Park, New Jersey_

It had been a month since Ashley and Shane had moved into their new home. The house was huge besides the normal rooms such as the kitchen and family room the house consisted of a finished basement which Ashley and Shane converted into two spacious rooms, one a play room for the boys and the other an office for both adults to work from home is they chose to. Besides the master bedroom the house had 4 other bedrooms for the kids. They had a very spacious back yard and both Declan and Dean were thrilled to find out that the new house had not only a in ground pool but a swing set and a tree house for them to play with. Ashley and Shane had purchased bunk beds to put in Declan's room for when Dean slept over and it was decided that Phinnigan and Kenyon would share a room because they seemed to like it that way anyways.

"I know Court and the absolute best part is this neighborhood has one of the best schools in the whole state" Ashley beamed as she told one of her best friends about her new home. It was crazy to believe that at one time Ashley and Courtney had hated each other and that all it would take was for Courtney to punch Ashley in the face for them to become almost inseparable.

"Are you still on your little campaign for the childcare for the WWE?" Courtney asked.

"Hell yeah" Ashley replied "I think this will really benefit everyone involved"

"So has Randy showed up yet?"

"Nope and I'm kinda hoping that both him and John forgot about it"

"I wouldn't count on it … John has been looking forward to seeing Phinnigan for the past two weeks now" Courtney informed her friend "it's all he's been able to talk about, he's really excited"

Ashley rolled her eyes, although she had agreed that Phinnigan could spend time with John after much pestering from both Shane and Randy, she still had her reservations about the whole situation.

Phinnigan came barreling into the kitchen and attached himself to her leg. He looked up at her and grinned sheepishly. He hid his face in the back of her pants all the while giggling.

"Hey baby boy what's goin' on?" she asked.

Phinnigan put his pointer finger to his mouth and shushed her. A few seconds later a mischievous looking Shane walked into the kitchen and began looking around. She told Courtney that she would talk to her later and hung up the phone before placing her hands on her hips.

"Hmm … I don't see Phinney in here" he said placing his hands on his hips "I wonder where he is"

Phinnigan kept on giggling and all Ashley could do was smile. She loved how much Shane care for her son. He was the rock both she and Phinnigan needed in their lives.

"Ash, have you seen Phinney?" Shane asked her.

"Nope I can't say I have" she played along with their little game.

"Well I guess I can't do this to him then" Shane suddenly sprinted behind her and grabbed Phinnigan.

Phin let out a surprised squeal and began laughing as Shane began tickling him. Phinnigan managed to get himself out of Shane's grasp and took off once again. He seemed to like this little game he and Shane were playing and wanted to be chased some more.

"Gotta go babe … your son doesn't seem to want to take a break"

"Better you than me pal, I have to deal with all 3 boys when they get like this and let me tell you the two younger ones have formed an alliance to drive me crazy before the next new year"

Shane just laughed as he ran off to catch the toddler before he found something to destroy. Both adults seemed very pleased at how easy the transition moving was for all 3 boys which made everything all the more simple. The last thing they needed was a bunch of homesick little boys on top of everything else they had to deal with. There was a knock on the door and Ashley went to answer it. She opened the door and welcomed Randy into her new home.

"Is Phin ready?" Randy asked.

"Just let me find him" she told him.

"Shane" she called to her boyfriend "Shane"

"Yes Ashley" Shane called back to her.

"Randy is here so grab Phin while I pack his diaper bag please" Randy could tell just by hearing his best friend speak that she was stressed out and he couldn't blame her she had a lot on her plate right now. She gave him a smile before climbing the stairs to the second level of her home.

"Hey man" Shane walked into the room with a very wound up Phinnigan in his arms. The young boy was yelling and squirming as he tried to get out of Shane's arms.

"Hey Phinney are you ready to spend some time with your dad" Randy greeted his godchild.

"Ranny!" Phinnigan yelled practically jumping out of Shane's arms into Randy's.

"Someone had way too much sugar today" Randy remarked.

"Good luck buddy" Shane smacked Randy on the shoulder before walking away.

"Ok here we are ... there are diapers and wipes and his diaper rash cream. Also some of his trucks and his binky and blanket and there is a list of all the important numbers like his pediatrician and the poison control center and the fire department and 911"

"Hey" Randy lightly grabbed her chin so her eyes were level with his "Phin will be fine this isn't the first time I've taken him out before and my mom is a nurse so I'm pretty sure if something happens to him I'll be able to handle it"

"I'm just worried about how he's going to react with John" she admitted.

"Everything will be fine Ash ... it's just a few hours" he kissed her forehead.

"Take care of him Randy" she said.

He gave her a smile and a nod before taking the diaper bag from her. After he helped Phinnigan put his coat on he handed the boy over to his mother so she could give him a kiss goodbye.

"Be a good boy ok baby" she kissed his cheek.

"Bye bye" Phinnigan waved to her as he and Randy were leaving.

Shane put his arms around her and kissed the top of her head.

"I know this was the last thing you wanted to do but I am proud of you for being big enough to give John another chance with Phin"

"I'm glad one of us is happy about this ..."

"What's the matter?" Shane asked concerned by her sudden moodiness.

She just shook her head trying to clear it "I don't know ... I can't explain it I have this overwhelmingly strong feeling that I am going to loose my son and it is scaring the hell out of me" she admitted.

"You are not going to loose your son so stop even thinking that alright"

It was decided that John would meet Randy and Phinnigan at a local pizza parlor and things would go from there. When Randy and Phin arrived John was already sitting at a booth waiting for them.

"Hey big guy" he took Phinnigan from Randy's arms and he gave him a big hug "I've missed you"

He helped Phinnigan out of his coat and Phin contented himself to sitting next to his dad on his knees so he could reach the table. Randy took out a few of Phinnigan's trucks and gave them to the little boy to play with. Phinnigan smiled as he ran one of his matchbox cars over the table surface.

"Ranny" he yelled to get the older man's attention.

"I see you driving those cars buddy good job but keep them on the table ok" he told the child.

"Hey Phin who is the guy sitting next to you?" Randy asked the boy as they ate pizza.

Phinnigan grinned and waved his hand in front of his face in his own version on "you can't see me". Both men laughed at the little boy. He frowned not knowing why they were laughing at him but soon his attention was brought back to the small pieces of pizza he was trying to get into his mouth.

"Look at your face baby boy ... you have sauce all over it" John tried to wipe Phinnigan's face. But the little boy fought him tooth and nail about it.

"He doesn't like having his face washed" Randy informed him "typical boy"

"Phin you wanna show me some of your cars?" John asked the little boy in an attempt to help open Phinnigan up.

"Car" Phinnigan said placing some of the cars Randy had moved when they started eating pizza back onto the table.

Randy's cell phone began to ring and he looked at John for a moment.

"You gonna be ok with his for a few minutes ... I mean like I don't have to worry about you snatching him and running off to another country do I?" Randy asked.

"Nah man my name isn't Ash" John muttered somewhat bitterly "good ahead take your call me and Phin will still be here when you get back".

Randy nodded and walked away to talk on his phone.

"What kind of car is this?" John asked his son.

"Not car 'ruck" Phinnigan replied.

"You are right silly me this is a truck isn't it" John pretended to smack himself in the head.

Phinnigan grinned and whacked John in the forehead as well. Then the toddler laughed at his father's expense. John smiled at the boy and he could sense that his son was starting to open up to him which he couldn't be happier about.

Randy's face was deadly white when he walked back over to the table. John knew right away that something was terribly wrong.

"Rans, what's the matter Dean is ok right nothing is wrong with him?" John asked.

"No man Dean is fine I talked to him this morning he is having a blast staying with my parents ..."

"Ok then what's the matter?" John asked still concerned.

"That was Sister Agnes ... you know the lady from the orphanage"

"Don't tell me they found some relative to Dean who wants him back" John said.

"No, not Dean ... Phinnigan" Randy said "his parents want him back"

The blood left John's face leaving it identical to Randy's. He looked over at Phinnigan who was still playing with his trucks completely oblivious to what was going on. There was no way this could be happening ... not now! Not ever!

A/N: Well here's another chapter. I want to thank everyone who sent messages telling me to feel better. I feel much better which is a total good thing. For all you guys who haven't checked out my new story Five Questions with Daddy you should check it out cause it's really funny. Well I think so. So thanks for reading and I'll get another chapter up fairly soon I promise.


	19. Chapter 19

_Chapter 19: How to Save a Life_

"_Hello"_ a very groggy John Cena answered his cell phone.

"Hi it's me listen up because I'm only going to say this once meet me in the diner we used to go to when we were in Jersey in about 10 minutes and don't be late" Ashley hung up the phone before John could even utter a word.

It was a blistering cold morning and John could see the tiny white clouds as he exhaled. The icy wind nipped at his face causing him to pull the hood of his sweatshirt closer to his face in an ill attempt to try to stay warm. He sighed in relief as he entered the heavenly warmth of the diner. True to her word she was there waiting for him. She donned a pair of sunglasses and her hair was pulled back into a tight bun. He could tell even before he sat down that this was not a personal get together, she had an agenda and she was dragging him into it.

"What's this all about?" he asked taking off his coat and having a seat across from her.

She sipped her coffee and looked him over for a few moments as if to almost see if she should even bother talking to him or not.

"You and I we are not friends" she started off by saying "but we do need each other if we are going to keep our son with us"

"I don't want to loose him anymore than you do believe me" he replied reaching out and taking her hand into his own. He caressed the back of her hand with his thumb as a sign that he was there for her.

"I've lost too much time with him already" he said.

She looked away almost guiltily "I'm not going to apologize for doing what I thought was best for my son"

She took her hand from his and removed her sunglasses, he could see now that her eyes were completely bloodshot indicating that she wasn't sleeping and she had probably been crying a lot.

"We won't loose him Ash" he tried to assure her.

"Easy for you to say John ... you can just go out and have another kid but I can't ... Phinnigan is my whole world, he's the only thing in my life that makes sense"

"Do you really think it would be just that easy" he shook his head disgusted "if I lost Phinnigan again it would kill me. You may not think so but I love my son more than anything else in the world and I don't give a damn what genetics say that's my little boy"

Ashley could see John's eyes were starting to get a little watery. Could she really have been wrong all this time. She was starting to get the feeling that she had misjudged him all this time.

"After Kelly had the miscarriage it really got me thinking"

Ashley who had been quietly drinking her coffee started choking in surprise. John looked startled as he reached over the table to pat her back a little to try and help her breathing return to normal. After a minute Ashley seemed to be breathing better.

"You ok?" John asked the red faced woman.

"Randy never told you did he?" Ashley asked already knowing the answer.

"Told me what?"

"Kelly was never pregnant" Ashley told him "she only said she was so she could get me out of the picture"

"That's not even remotely funny"

"It's not a joke John ... I would never make up something like this I swear" this time it was her who went to take his hand.

"How could no one tell me this..." John was so confused. He couldn't believe that he was sitting there with Ashley just now finding out that Kelly had played him for a fool all that time and no one had the decency to tell him about it.

"Randy overheard Kelly talking to Melina a while back and she admitted the whole thing and then Randy told me and well I beat the everliving shit out of her" she told him not proud of her actions.

"Wait ... you are the reason she left aren't you"

"Guilty as charged" Ashley reached into her pocket and pulled out the tape recorder she had used to record Kelly's confession. She slid it across the table to him and all he could do was stare at it.

"I gotta go" he stood up and threw his jacket on. He picked up the tape recorder and put in into his pocket.

"Wait ... John what about Phinnigan?" Ashley called to his retreating form.

He didn't utter another word he just got into his car and took off like a bat out of hell. Ashley was going to kill Randy the next time she saw him.

"Well this can't be good" she said to herself throwing some money on the table before leaving the diner herself.


	20. Chapter 20

_Chapter 20: Never Let Go_

_Can you lose everything, you ever had planned?  
Can you sit down again, and play another hand?  
Could you risk everything, for the chance of being alone?  
Under pressure find the grace, or would you come undone?  
_

With a pounding head she slowly sat up. She didn't speak right away, she waited for the room to stop spinning before opening her mouth.

"Nice of you to join us in the conscious world" Shane greeted her bitterly.

"Don't start with me ok Shane … I've heard enough" she looked around her at the mess she had created.

Liquor bottles and beer cans littered the floor, cigarette buds were scattered all over the coffee table. Slowly she got off the floor where she passed out the night before. Shane's disapproving gaze followed her as she went to go brush her teeth.

"What time is it?" she asked.

Shane, who was leaning against the door frame, glanced at his watch.

"Almost 2" he replied.

"Shit … why didn't you wake me up" she groaned. She had so much to do today and she had spent most of the day sleeping.

"I'm sorry princess but I figured the more sleep you got the less hung over you might be" he retorted coldly.

"Loose the attitude Shane I'm a big girl and if I want to get drunk and have fun I will" she rolled her eyes at him and hastily bumped into his as she passed by.

"Not with 3 little boys asleep upstairs you won't"

"What do I care I mean Phin is getting taken away from us anyways so what does it matter"

Shane sighed as he slammed his fist into the wooden doorframe. Ashley looked startled as she stared at him in astonishment.

"So you are just giving up then … you hit one little speed bump and you just hand that little boy over"

"What do you know of it Shane he's not your son … your boys are safe and sound … your boys don't ever have to worry about being taken from you" Ashley spat at him.

"I love that little boy as if he was my own son … can Phin say that about you lately" Shane simply shook his head before walking out of the house.

Ashley screamed and sent a pile of clean dishes crashing to the floor. She hated this … she hated Shane right now and most of all she hated feeling so helpless. She knew if she kept acting the way she was Phinnigan was as good as gone. She rested her head against the cool surface of the counter top and closed her eyes.

_I don't wanna close my eyes I don't wanna fall asleep 'Cause I'd miss you, babe And I don't wanna miss a thing._

She groaned as she picked her head up off the counter. She dragged herself over to the other side of the kitchen to where her cell phone was.

"What" she snapped into the phone.

"_Geez … what the hell is the matter with you"_

"My life that is what is wrong with me" she muttered making her way to the living room before collapsing on the couch.

"_It'll get better Ash and you know that"_

"Court, I totally blew up at Shane … I'm worried about John … and to top that all off people are trying to take my son away from me and that is just at the top of the list of things that couldn't possibly get any worse"

"_What's the matter with John?"_ Courtney asked concerned.

"I told him about Kelly" she sheepishly admitted.

"_YOU DID WHAT!!!!"_ Ashley held the phone away from her ear _"ARE YOU FRICKIN INSANE"_

"Well nobody told me that he didn't know and your boyfriend was supposed to tell him months ago"

"_Damn … well that explains a lot I guess"_

"What do you mean?" Ashley asked lighting up her first cigarette of the day.

"_Well John took a few days off and he hasn't been answering when Randy or I call him"_

"Ok well at least I know it isn't just me … I've tried to call him a few times since he stormed out of the diner we were at and I haven't heard anything from him since and that was like a week and a half ago"

"_He probably just needs some time by himself to process what you told him"_ Courtney reasoned _"he was really upset after he found out about the "miscarriage" so finding out he mourned the loss of a baby that was never really there is probably driving him crazy"_

"I'm really worried about him" Ashley admitted.

"_What you need to be worried about is your relationship with Shane … from what I've been hearing you guys have been fighting something fierce lately"_

"He's less than pleased about the new habits I've taken up" Ash stamped out her cigarette and lit another one. She took a deep drag and just held it in her lungs for a few seconds before exhaling.

"_So it's true all the rumors about you drinking and partying like you are the next Britney Spears"_ Courtney asked a little appalled.

"Well I wouldn't go that far but yes I have taken up smoking and drinking which is something I haven't done since I was in high school but you know what I need something to help me relax"

"_There are other ways to unwind"_ Courtney said.

"Court … you know what when you have kids and someone threatens to take them away from you then you can tell me what to do ok"

"_I was just trying to help…"_

"I'm sorry Court, I know you were it's just I think I'm going crazy"

"_How about I come and pick up Phin for the night and you and Shane can have some time to talk about everything"_

"Yeah that would be great … he gets home from daycare at 3:30 so come pick him up around 4"

"_Will do" _

"Court … I'm sorry again I shouldn't have gone off on you like that" Ashley apologized sincerely.

"_Just try and pull yourself together before Phin gets home ok"_

After she hung up the phone Ashley managed to get herself into the shower and dressed. Her head was clearer now and she started to clean up the house. When she was done it looked almost respectable again. She had no idea how everything had gotten this far, all she wanted to do was try and ease her fears about loosing her son. She took a few deep breaths and had a few more cigarettes.

"I need a drink" she said to herself.

She rummaged around the house but much to her unhappiness Shane had either thrown out or hid all the alcohol they had in their home.

"I HATE THIS PLACE" she screamed to no one in particular.

Her body felt like lead weights and she could feel herself growing more and more light headed as each second ticked by. Somehow she made it to the couch before she passed out again.

Shane walked into the house an hour later. He rolled his eyes as he saw once again his girlfriend passed out. He walked over to her and placed two fingers on her throat to make sure she still had a pulse, something he was almost ashamed her seemed to do a lot recently. He looked around the house and was almost impressed that she had managed to clean up. The thing that bothered him was that he knew she was scared to death at the possibility that they might loose Phinnigan but he just wished that she would let him help her instead of getting drunk all the time. He walked over to their stereo and turned it on. Radio Nowhere by Bruce Springsteen began blaring full blast from the speakers which just so happened to be right by Ashley's head.

She jumped up off the couch and landed hard on the floor. She glared at him and he just stood there smirking with his arms crossed.

"Fuck you McMahon" she grumbled standing up.

"Why you do it so much better than I ever could" he taunted her "so how much have you had to drink today"

"Nothing … I haven't had anything to drink"

"Wow! What's the occasion?"

"I don't have to stand here and take this abuse"

"The only abuse around here is what you are doing to yourself" he countered "and I have something or should I say someone here to make you change your ways mighty quickly"

As if on cue Isa walked into the living room. She wore a look of disgust on her face, Shane had filled her in on the details but part of her couldn't believe how low her best friend had sunk until now.

"I'm going to pick up Phinnigan" she said not even bothering to greet one of her oldest friends.

"No, I'll pick up Phin … you get to stay here and catch up"

"I'm away from you for a little more than a year and you completely hit rock bottom … what the hell is the matter with you"

"Isa, I'm going to say this once stay out of this" Ashley warned her.

"Oh yeah let me take advice from the lush"

"Isabella I will kick your ass and not think twice about it" Ashley tried again to warn her.

"The Ashley I remember would never raise her hand to her best friend"

"Well the Ashley you knew also believed in happy endings and we both know they don't exist" Ashley countered.

"Why are you loosing hope … you haven't lost your son yet? Why are you so quick to throw in the towel" Isabella couldn't understand at all why her best friend was acting like this.

"Why doesn't everyone just leave me the fuck alone and let me deal with this in my own way"

"Ok Britney but you know keep it up you are going to have nothing"

Ashley finally got tired of people calling her Britney so she brought her arm back and punched the wall which was just mere inches from Isa's face. Isa just stood there unblinking, she seemed unphased by the whole scene that just happened. Ashley looked at her hand which was already starting to bruise.

"Y… you know what … I need a cigarette" with shaking hands she managed to get a cigarette into her mouth and light it. She took a drag and blew out the smoke right in Isa's face. Isabella just stood there taking the abuse after all she had always been the more mature one of the two. Ashley was hardheaded and didn't like to get help from people add that to the fact she always had to be right and you got pretty frustrating results.

"You keep going down this path you are going to loose everything … Shane, your son … everything" Isabella advised her.

The front door opened and Phinnigan came running in. He ran to his mother and tugged on her pants for her to pick him up. Which she did of course but not before putting her cigarette out. He crinkled his nose and waved his hand in front of his face.

"Phin did you see who came all the way here to see you?" Ashley asked trying to get everyone off her case for a little while.

"Isa!" Phinnigan exclaimed excitedly.

"Hey there little guy" Isabella took Phinnigan from Ashley "I have a present for you"

"Yay!" was Phinnigan's reply.

"Well I'd better go pack his bag" Ashley said making an excuse to not be in the same room with Shane.

"Why where is he going?" Shane asked.

"Court is taking him for the night" she replied.

Phinnigan came running back into the room with a sombrero and a pair of maracas. Ashley eyes him with amusement, his eyes were wide as he shook the maracas.

"Phin did you say thank you?" Ashley asked.

"Yep" he replied.

"Well guess what you get to spend the night with Auntie Courtney" she told him.

He really didn't seem too affected by the news cause he was always hanging out with his cool Auntie Courtney. Ashley looked from Shane to Isabella who had just reentered the room.

"Well I'd better go get a bag ready" she said picking up Phinnigan and taking him to his room.

Isabella followed her, she took in the room before her. Two cribs lined one wall above each crib mounted on the wall was the name of the boy the crib belonged to. Phinnigan sat cross-legged on the light blue carpet playing with his trucks. He looked up as Isa entered the room and gave her a smile.

"You sure you want him away from you this close to the court date?" Isa advised her. The court date was only a week away now.

"Apparently me and Shane have some stuff to work out" Ashley remarked not really paying attention.

"What happened to you Ash … I just talked to you a month ago and you seemed so happy?"

"Well right after I got that phone call I got another one saying that Phinnigan's birthparents wanted him back so that kinda put a damper on my happiness" she retorted sarcastically.

"So you want to loose everything then because that is what is going to happen if you continue the way you have been behaving the past couple of weeks"

"They can't take anything away from you if you have nothing"

"Phin do you want to wear your red pajamas or the blue ones tonight?" Ashley asked her son.

"Blue"

"Alrighty then you are all packed little boy"

Just as Ashley was finishing zipping up Phinnigan's overnight bag the door bell rang. Phinnigan dashed ahead of them to be the first one to greet Courtney.

"Nene" Phinnigan greeted her.

"Hey there Tootsie Roll get over here" she held out her arms for Phinnigan to give her a hug.

Phinnigan jumped into her arms and she stood back up so she was holding the baby.

"Gimme a high five" Phinnigan did as he was told.

"Hey Court" Shane kissed Courtney's cheek "thanks for watching him tonight"

"No prob" Courtney said "you remember my sister Becky right"

"I thought your sister's name is Tiffany" Shane said.

"It is but I hate the name Tiffany so people call me by my middle name Rebecca" the young woman explained.

"Becky … it's been too long" Ashley greeted Becky with a hug.

"Yes it has" Becky looked Ashley over and the woman before her was not the same one she remembered hanging out with all the time last year.

"Well we should be going … we'll see you later Brit" Courtney teased taking the bag from Ashley and grabbing Phinnigan's coat.

'Try not to have too much fun there Paris" Ashley shot back with a smug grin.

"Touché … touché" Courtney said shutting the door behind her.

Later that night Ashley snuck into Phinnigan and Kenyon's room and just stood by her son's crib. She placed both hands on the guard rail and took a few deep breaths willing herself not to break down. She hadn't lost him yet and if she kept thinking she was going to loose him then she had already lost him.

"What are you doing in here?" Shane asked coming to stand next to her.

"I'm so afraid of loosing my baby Shane … I don't think I could handle it if the judge rules against us" she tearfully admitted.

"Baby you can't think like that" he wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I can't help it; I look at him and being to panic"

"Any judge who gives a toddler back to the parents that left him to die with a parking lot is an idiot and you know that" Shane said.

"You don't understand Shane … I am the only mother that little boy has ever know and I am just supposed to hand him over to two complete strangers who obviously didn't give a damn if their son lived or died … what if they try and hurt him or starve him and I'll never know and all he will think is why did my mommy leave me with these horrible people … didn't she love me"

Ashley moved across the room to the window and looked out into the back yard. The moonlight shined in through the window and it gave Ashley and almost translucent eerie look.

"How am I supposed to look him in the eyes and tell him that he can't live with us anymore … how do you tell a toddler than even though you fought as hard as you could they still have to leave the only people they have ever known?"

"I don't have any answers for you baby" was all Shane could say.

"That is why I started drinking because I thought it would help take away the pain but nothing does I still feel it"

"How can you be so sure that custody will be awarded back to his parents?" Shane asked her.

"Because if I were the biological mother I would stop at nothing until I had my baby boy back in my arms" she said turning to look at him.

She was pale and looked almost like a ghost to Shane. A ghost of her former self was reflecting through in the moonlight.

"If you were his biological mother you wouldn't have left him at Walmart to begin with"

"I'm just so sick of feeling helpless" she grunted grabbing at her hair in a frustrated manner.

"Whatever happens we will get through this together and if the judge takes Phinnigan away from us we will do everything we can to get him back because no one is taking **our** son away from us … no one"

And in that moment Ashley felt hopeful again. She wasn't sure if it was Shane's words that lit the fire in her soul or if it was the passionate way he had said them. But for the first time in weeks she could see clearly and now she knew what was really important and that was her baby boy and she would fight with every ounce in her to make sure her baby stayed where he belonged, with his family.

A/N: I would like to thank the character Nathan Scott (One Tree Hill) for inspiring me to write this chapter. I would also like to thank Tiffany for the nickname Tootsie Roll. You rock Becky!


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21: Behind Those Eyes

_3 days before the trial_

John raised his fist to knock on the door of his current fiancée's home. He was still really pissed off that she had lied to him. His fist stopped half way, was he sure he really wanted to end everything this way. He took a breath and knocked he waited for a few minutes before Kelly's bright face greeted him.

"Hey baby what are you doing here?" she went to give him a kiss. He moved away from her before she could.

"What's going on?" She asked confused by his refusal of her kiss.

"We need to talk" his voice was cold and unfeeling.

She stepped away from the door and allowed him to enter. He noticed right away the casts that had been placed over both her hands.

"What happened?" he asked gesturing to her hands.

"Your psycho baby's mama attacked me with a baseball bat and shattered both of my hands which I needed to have immediate reconstructive surgery on"

"Now what would make Ash want to come all the way from Australia to do that?" John feigned ignorance.

"Gee I don't know she's crazy and always has been" was Kelly's reply.

"It wouldn't have anything to do with this would it?" John asked pulling the tape recorder out of his pocket.

Kelly's face paled at the sight of the oh so familiar object. "John I can explain"

"Well that's nice to know … cause I'm kinda confused" he ran a hand through his short hair.

"I … I just told her that so she wouldn't hit me with the bat again" Kelly lied.

"I don't believe you … damn it Kelly just tell the truth"

"What do you want me to say" she looked at the ground.

"The truth would be nice you and I both know Ashley wouldn't attack you if she didn't have a reason"

"Fine I lied is that what you wanted to hear" she crossed her arms in a prissy manner.

"I just don't understand why would you do something so hurtful … I lost almost a whole year with my son because of your lie"

"Why did I do it John … THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT TO KNOW" she began to yell at him "MAYBE BECAUSE YOU HAD YOUR HEAD SO FAR UP ASHLEY'S ASS I THOUGHT I WOULD NEVER BE ABLE TO GET IT OUT UNLESS I DID SOMETHING DRASTIC"

"Kelly you messed with people's lives and it sounds like you feel no remorse at all"

"I did what I had to do and you know what it worked Ashley left and I got you all to myself"

"Well guess what princess we are done … finished … broken up"

"John what does breaking up with me serve Ashley is still with my cousin?"

"She may be with your cousin but at least this way I can be with someone who doesn't lie and cheat to get what she wants because she feels a little threatened and another thing I was going to break up with you that day and not only was I going to break up with you but I was going to apologize to you for cheating on you with Ashley while we were is Massachusetts telling my parents about Phinnigan but you know what I have never been happier about it then right now"

"You cheated on me?" Kelly asked shocked.

"You bet your ass I did" he smiled cockily.

"We can work this out you know … I forgive you for cheating on me I really do"

"How about hell fucking no"

"John please don't leave me I love you" she begged.

"You need some serious help" he said making his way to the door.

"Johnny … you don't want to leave me" she said in a seductive tone pulling down her shirt a little to give him a view of what he would be walking away from.

"I have been wanting to say this for quite a long time … go back to the doctor who gave you those and sue him for everything he is worth because that is the worst boob job I have ever seen in my life" with that he walked out of the door and made his way to his car. She was standing in the doorway watching him go and in that moment she swore she would get her revenge on Ashley and John if it was the last thing she did.

_Day of the trial _

Phinnigan fussed as Ashley tried her best to fix the tie he was wearing. Although he would not be in the court room with them today he would be staying with a social worker until custody was decided.

"You look very handsome little man" Ashley just looked at him and she could feel the tears stinging her eyelids. She blinked them away and focused on the task of dressing her son for what could very well be the last time.

"Phinney come here so I can talk to you for a sec" Ashley patted the spot next to her on the bed. Phinnigan walked away from the mirror he had been looking at himself in and had a seat next to his mom.

He seemed to know something was off today. He placed his little hand in her much larger one. She kissed his hand and let it rest on the bed.

"I have to tell you something ok and you might not understand it but I need to say it anyways so just listen to me ok" he looked at her with a quizzical expression on his face. He scrunched his eyes as if deep in thought but his gaze remained on his mother.

"Today me and Shane and your daddy are going to court today" she explained to him "I know you have no idea what court is but these people are trying to take you away from us but we are fighting as hard as we possibly can to keep you because we love you"

"You have no idea what I am saying to you do you?" she asked, he nodded his head.

"Well no matter what I want you to remember that I love you very much and that even if we are apart I will always be with you right here" she placed her hand over his heart. He placed his hand over hers and they just sat there for a few minutes.

There was a knock on the door and Ashley called for whoever it was to come in. A very somber looking Randy came walking into the room.

"How are you doing?" he asked.

"I'm ok for the moment"

"Ranny!" Phinnigan hopped off the bed and ran to hug his uncle's leg.

Randy picked the small boy up and tipped him over so that Randy was holding onto his legs and his head was dangling freely.

"You are going to hurt his head doing that" Ashley warned him.

"The kid loves it … listen he's laughing" he contradicted her.

She just rolled her eyes; Randy placed Phinnigan back onto the floor.

"More" Phinnigan pleaded using the sign language her had learned that meant more.

"Later baby we have to get going" Ashley told him.

"Everyone is waiting in the family room for us" Randy told Ashley as the 3 made their way to the first floor.

"Who is everyone?" she asked.

"Everyone … you know like the whole family" Randy reiterated.

When Randy said everyone he wasn't kidding. John and his parents and brothers were there. Along with Shane parents and Stephanie and Paul. Ashley's dad and Lilian were there with her two brothers. Courtney and Becky and Isabella were also present.

"There's my boy" John walked over to Ashley, they exchanged glances before she handed the toddler to his dad.

Phinnigan looked around at all the people and then his attention returned back to John. He smiled at his dad before resting his head on his shoulder. He stuck his thumb into his mouth and closed his eyes.

"Someone is tired" Stephanie observed.

"Well that could be because he was up all night crying because someone's son who shall remain nameless told Phinnigan he had to go away forever because he got mad at him for stealing his toy and then his father laughed his ass off about it"

"What … he's 5, he doesn't know any better" Randy defended his son.

"You are such an idiot" Courtney smacked Randy's shoulder.

"Woman why are you hitting me" Randy retorted.

"Because you are a dumbass" Courtney replied hitting him again.

"Carol can you please tell her to stop hitting me?" he begged his best friend's mother.

"Sorry Randy but my grandson is exhausted and somehow it is your fault"

"Yeah well my son is a good boy" Randy defended his son once again.

"Keep telling yourself that buddy and maybe you will get yourself to believe it" Ashley kidded him.

"You know what I hate you all!" Randy exclaimed.

"We should be going soon" Shane said gazing at his watch.

"Ok but I refuse to ride with Randy in the car" Ashley said.

"Like I would want to go in a car with you" Randy crossed his arms over his chest irritatedly.

"Ok kids that's enough" Chris decided to play referee before Ashley and Randy made each other cry which they had done before on numerous occasions.

"This isn't over" Ashley walked off.

"Just bring it baby anytime"

John just shook his head as he followed Ashley out of the house. He helped her put Phinnigan into his car seat. Phinnigan woke up as soon as he was put into the chair and he looked around confused.

"Hey buddy it's ok" John tried to ease his son's worry.

"Dada" he said holding out his tiny arms.

Both Ashley and John stopped what they were doing to look at the toddler. Phinnigan began to whine and held out his arms wanting to be picked up again.

"He just called me Dada … did you hear that" John grinned from ear to ear.

"Yeah great" Ashley muttered mentally going over everything before they got to the court house. She was leaning against the car door flipping through a spiral notebook.

"A little more excitement would be nice"

"Sorry I'm kinda concerned that we might not be bringing him back home" she retorted.

"We will so just relax"

"Damn it!" she exclaimed reaching into her the messenger bag she was wearing. Besides her notebook she also had an album she had made for Phinnigan and also carefully tucked towards the back was a bottle of tequila.

"Give me that" he snatched the cigarette away from her "you wanna give yourself cancer then fine but you won't be doing it near my son"

"Buzz off" she said.

"Sorry honey but you are stuck with me all day" he slung his arm around her shoulders.

"Don't you have to go call Kelly or something?" she asked taking his arm off of her.

"Nope I don't think she wants me to call her after I broke up with her and told her that her boobs were not only fake but horrible"

Ashley's mouth fell open "You did what!"

"Well I confronted her and she told me she lied and I broke up with her and then the crazy bitch had the audacity to tell me that we could work it out"

Ashley couldn't help but start to laugh. John laughed as well because he even had to admit that after the fact Kelly's face when he called her on her boob job was priceless. He enjoyed hearing Ashley laugh again.

"Friends?" he asked putting his hand out for her to shake.

"Come here you ass" she gave him a hug.

"Don't think that I have completely forgiven you for everything I'm just willing to try to make amends" she said pulling away from him.

"Anything is better than not having you in my life at all I know that now" he said.

"But I will admit I would have loved to be a fly on the wall when you told Kelly off" she cracked a little smile.

The rest of the people started filing out of the front door by now.

"Babe I'm going to catch a ride with my parents to show them where to go" Shane said.

"It's cool I suppose Jackass over here can ride with me"

"Shot gun" Ashley could hear Randy yell somewhere in the distance.

"Everything is going to be ok today so don't worry" Shane whispered to her. They were the only two people who weren't in cars.

"Thank you for supporting me even though I've been so crazy lately" she wrapped her arms around his neck and embraced him tightly. He rubbed her back a little and kissed the top of her head.

"I know this is really tough for you and I don't blame you for going off the deep end for a little bit" he said "all I care about is that you are back and Phinnigan comes home with us tonight"

"I love you" she said.

"I love you too" he gave her a quick peck on the lips.

They parted and each got into their perspective car. John was resting his head against the window when Ashley got into the car. Phinnigan had drifted back to sleep in the time they had been outside talking.

"I'm scared John … we could really loose him today" she admitted.

"I am too but we need to stay positive for Phin's sake because if he senses something is wrong it's just going to be harder for him no matter what"

"I was thinking Phin could spend some time with you at your house" she said pulling out of the driveway.

"Really?" John asked trying not to sound too excited.

"Yeah, after everything is said and done I'm going to rehab" she told him.

"Rehab for what?" he asked.

"You haven't heard I'm a drunk … not only am I a drunk I'm a big time drunk"

"Damn what the hell have you been doing since I took some time off"

"Well according to everyone getting drunk and partying like Britney Spears"

"I miss all the good stuff" he pretended to whine "but seriously if that's what you need to do then I support you all the way and Phin will be fine with me I'll take good care of him"

"I want to say I'm sorry John … I guess the fact that I might have to live without my son made me realize how hard it must have been for you to live without him"

"I'm not going to lie to you I was hurting really badly for a long time not having both of you in my life but I understand why you needed to get away, what Kelly did was inexcusable she took your one weakness and used it against all of us"

Ashley stopped at a red light and took a moment to glance at her son in the rearview mirror.

"He looks like an angel when he sleeps" she mused.

"Yeah he does" John agreed.

They pulled into the parking lot of the court house and could see paparazzi everywhere. Ashley began to panic, she and John made it very clear that Phinnigan remained out of the public eye.

"What is going on?" Ashley asked clearly beginning to panic.

"Ash relax I have a plan" John said taking off his suit jacket.

He got out of the car and went to the backseat to grab Phinnigan. He gently picked Phinnigan up and put his coat over him so he couldn't be seen.

"I'm going to kill Vince" Ashley said through gritted teeth as she got out of the car.

Cameras started going off as soon as she did. People came running over to her sticking tape recorders and microphones in her face.

"Ashley are you worried about loosing your son?" Someone asked.

"We are going to do everything we can to keep Phinnigan with us" was all she would say.

"Can we get a picture of the boy?" someone else asked.

"We would like to protect our son's privacy so no pictures at this time" John said helping Ashley move through the crowd.

"We will answer all your questions after" John said still fighting his way through the mob.

They met with Randy and Shane who helped get them into the building safely. Everyone was waiting for them in the foyer of the out building. Ashley looked around the interior was in desperate need of a paint job.

"Vince why are there paparazzi outside?" Ashley asked.

"Don't look at me I have no idea" he replied.

"I need a cigarette" she said stepping away from the group.

"I'll keep you company Ash" Randy said putting an arm around her.

"I thought you quit smoking" Ashley said after Randy asked to bum a cigarette off of her.

"I did but sometimes when I have a million things going on at once it's a nice stress reliever" he said bringing the cigarette to his lips.

"Yeah tell me about it"

"So how are you doing?" he asked concerned about her state of mind.

"I've been better" she replied.

"You wanna tell me what you are thinking"

"I'm scared Rans, Phinnigan is my whole world and if I loose him I know I'll go off the deep end"

"You won't loose him I promise you that" he assured her.

"Don't make promises you can't keep Randal" she threw her cigarette bud on the ground and stepped on it.

"Have I ever lied to you before?"

"Yes … multiple times"

"Well I'm not lying this time you won't loose him your family won't let that happen" he gave her a hug.

"When did you become my protector" she rested her head against his chest.

"A very long time ago" he kissed the top of her head "we are all worried about you kiddo"

"Once this whole thing is all over I'll be back to my old self I promise" they broke apart and he grabbed her hand and they walked back into the court house.

Phinnigan had woken up by now and he was sitting with his grandpa John. Ashley found herself to be suddenly cold so she wrapped her arms around her tiny frame to keep from shivering.

"You ok?" Shane asked.

"Yeah just a little cold" she said.

Shane took off his suit jacket and handed it to his girlfriend. She smiled at him and gratefully placed the jacket around herself. Shane put his arm around her and they just stood there comforting each other. The front doors to the courtroom opened and a two teens walked in they were followed by two sets of adults who Ashley assumed were their parents. The young woman looked up in time to lock eyes with Ashley. She found herself looking into eyes that were twins of her son's.

"Phinnigan's birth mother" she whispered to herself.

The young girl offered her a sad smile as her parents ushered her away. A few seconds later Ashley found herself greeting the social worker who would be staying with Phinnigan while everything was decided.

Ashley kneeled down so she was the same size as Phinnigan.

"I love you so much" she gave him a kiss and a hug "be a good boy for this nice lady ok"

It was John's turn now to say goodbye to him son "Be a good little guy and always know that no matter what you were loved"

"Luff yous" Phinnigan said giving his dad a hug.

Ashley came to stand next to Courtney who gave her a tight hug. Ashley closed her eyes and tried to get herself to relax.

"It's going to be alright" Courtney said.

The social worker grabbed Phinnigan's hand and they began to walk away. Phinnigan turned around and waved to "his family" one last time before he was taken out of sight. It took all of Ashley's strength not to break down at that very moment because god knows she wanted to. The court room doors opened.

"You ready to do this?" John asked taking her hand in his much larger one.

"As ready as I'll ever be" she replied taking the first steps at what would determine the rest of her life.


	22. Chapter 22

_Chapter 22: Stand_

"Court is in session" the bailiff yelled "all rise"

Everyone stood as the man dressed in the black and white robes entered the court room from his chambers. Ashley could feel her heart in her throat. Her heart was beating so fast that she thought she was literally going to have a heart attack. Her palms were sweating and her breathing was becoming more and more irate.

"Are you ok?" John asked his ex girlfriend who happened to be sitting next to him.

"I'm almost certain that I am having a panic attack" she replied.

"Are you going to be ok … do you need some air?" he leaned closer to her.

"No … I'll be fine I just need to get this over with" she assured him.

She closed her eyes and pictured herself on a beach with beautiful aqua water. She was standing on the shore line with the water lapping at her bare feet. The sun was just about setting and she could feel the peace all around her. She opened her eyes again and she found herself being able to breathe easier.

"Wow I can't believe that really works" she said to herself about the relaxation exercise she had just preformed.

"You look like you feel better" John observed.

"I was just in Aruba" she replied giving him a smile.

"Next time take me with you"

She was about to reply when she heard her name being called. She gave John a nervous smile.

"Looks like I'm up"

After she was sworn in she had a seat on the witness stand. Her eyes shifted uncomfortably over everyone in the courtroom.

"Ms. Benoit will you please tell the court how you came to have the child in your care" her and John's attorney Charlotte Anderson said.

"Well we were traveling on our way Seattle when we made a stop at a Walmart because one of the people we were traveling with was thirsty. John and Randy and I were too lazy to go into Walmart so we remained in the car. I had climbed into the front seat from the back and was content with playing with the radio when John thought he heard something. He told us that he thought he heard a baby which I of course came up with a wise remark about it being Walmart and having babies all around but John was persistent and eventually we found that baby wrapped up in a towel in some shrubbery"

"What was his condition when you found him?" Charlotte asked.

"He was blue and shivering I think the doctors said he was near hypothermia but I don't really remember"

"So what made you decide to adopt the baby?"

"I felt like he needed me and that part of me needed him too" Ashley replied with a small shrug.

"Do you own your own home?"

"Yes, my boyfriend Shane and I own our own home"

"You named the baby Phinnigan William Joshua correct, care to explain to us where that name came from"

"Phinnigan was my grandfather's name … it means fair and I believed the name fit him because he was getting a fair chance at life as for the name William his father John said he looked like a William and Randy added Joshua" Ashley explained.

"Explain the relationship you have with Phinnigan's adoptive father John"

"We dated for a while and eventually broke up we still remained really great friends and at that time he was the only one I would want to share a child with"

"You said at the time has that changed since then?" Charlotte asked.

"Well yes I am dating someone so it would assume I would want to share a child with him"

"Well that's reasonable"

"How does John act with Phinnigan?" Charlotte asked.

"He's great with him, very caring … you can tell that he loves Phinnigan very much"

"What about your boyfriend Shane?"

"Shane is also very good with him and he treats Phinnigan just like his own two sons and all the boys act like brothers, they are all very close"

"That will be all for now"

Ashley braced herself from the next round of questions. She new the other attorney was going to be brutal. He was going to try to point out all her faults in order to make her seems than a less than competent mother. She had seen enough court room dramas and heard enough to know all about the intimidation techniques the man might use.

"Ms Benoit would it be ok if I called you Ashley?" the man asked.

"If you would like you may" she replied.

"What do you do for employment?" he asked.

"I am employed as apart of the World Wrestling Entertainment Franchise, I am assistant to the head script writer"

"Sounds like a very important job" the man almost sounded impressed.

"I suppose one would think so" Ashley said coolly.

"Are you nervous?" he asked.

"A little but I try not to let it get to me"

"So you say you found the baby in a parking lot is that correct?"

"Yes it is correct"

"What do you suppose he was doing there?"

"Well I think it would be obvious that someone left him there wouldn't you say that would be a fair assumption"

John smirked and reclined a little in his chair. This guy had no idea who he was messing with the more irritated someone made her the more sarcastic Ashley would become. John knew just by her tone that she was starting to get aggravated with this guy already.

"Why did you adopt the boy?"

"Why not I mean it is a free country right people can do what they please as long as it is within the statute of the law"

"But what I meant is why not have a baby of your own"

"Your honor I don't feel my client has to answer that very personal question!" Charlotte exclaimed jumping out of her seat.

"I'm agreeing with Ms. Anderson on this one Mr. Turner please keep the line of questioning relevant to the case at hand"

"If it is alright with you your honor I have no problem answering the question I have nothing to hide" Ashley said.

"Then go right ahead"

She took a moment to look at John, he nodded his head at her and she turned her cool gaze back to the man the judge had addressed as Turner.

"I can't have children of my own I was beaten as a teen and cannot conceive a child so I decided to adopt the little boy"

"So you were beaten … by whom?"

Ashley had already decided that she didn't like this guy but after that question she knew that he was a total asshole.

"Foster parents" she answered "I was put into a foster home at the age of 14 and they beat me repeatedly for a period of over 3 weeks"

Ashley looked up when she heard someone gasp. She looked over to see Phinnigan's birth mother, the young woman had placed her hand over her mouth in pure shock.

"So when I found out they were putting the baby into an orphanage I was afraid that something similar would happen to him so I decided to adopt him"

"Is it true that you told the head of the orphanage that you and Mr. Cena were engaged so it would give you a better chance to adopt the boy?"

Ashley knew he was going in for the kill now "Yes that is true but during the first of many check up visits that Sister Agnes did as part of the whole adoption process I did tell her the truth and she told me that it really didn't matter because Phinnigan seemed to be adjusting so well to us that she wasn't about to take him out of the healthy environment he was in"

"But you still lied to a nun how can you sleep at night"

"I sleep very fine knowing that my son is safe and sound in the room down the hall" she replied indignantly. She now wore a small smile at the attorney's flustered look.

"No further questions your honor" he barked before having a seat.

"You may step down Ms. Benoit" the judge told her.

"Thank you your honor" she responded before leaving the stand and returning to her seat.

"You did well up there" Charlotte patted her on the back "you didn't let them see any weakness"

"That guy is a shark" Ashley said "but I'm better" she added with a smirk.

"Here we go" John rolled his eyes.

Ashley leaned back in her chair "Paul" she whispered kinda loudly.

Paul wasn't paying attention "Hunter" Ashley said a little louder.

Still nothing. Shane was sitting directly behind Ashley. She gave him a pleading look and he leaned over and whispered something to his sister. She in turn elbowed her husband who happened to be staring off into space.

"What" he hissed looking rather annoyed.

"Nice of you to join as back on earth" she whispered taking a look back at the judge who was paying attention to the piece of paper before him.

"If we win this I'm pulling a Shawn and just dropping to my knees and thanking the lord" she said.

"You do it and I'll buy your son his first car" he bet her not thinking that she would really do something that stupid in a court of law.

"You are so on"

She turned back around just in time. Turner was up again and he was going for his next victim John.

John stood up and smoothed down the front of the uncomfortable suit he just happened to be wearing. He squared his broad shoulders and had the seat Ashley had just vacated.

"Mr. Cena tell us in your own words what happened the night the baby was found"

"Ashley basically told the whole story we were in the parking lot and I heard a baby crying and I really can't explain it I just got a really bad feeling that something was wrong so we went and looked and we found Phin"

"Did you ever once think that maybe you were over your heads in this whole adoption thing?"

"When Ashley first came to me with the idea I thought it was kinda crazy but she seemed really excited about becoming a mother and after I found out what happened to her I wanted to help her in anyway I could. Ash is an amazing mom and Phinnigan is very lucky to have her"

"So it's safe to say you have known Ms. Benoit for a very long time?" he asked.

"Yeah you could say that I'd say it's about 6 years"

"And out of that 6 years how many were you in an intimate relationship with her?"

"2 years" he replied.

"So in those two years you knew nothing of her inability to have children?"

"Yeah, we were both really young so there wasn't much talk about having children so there was never a reason to tell me and besides that is her business"

"It just happens to be opportune that she just happens to disclose this abnormality just as she decided to adopt the boy … did you ever think maybe she made it up"

"OBJECTION YOUR HONOR! That is slander" Charlotte yelled.

"Ms. Anderson I expect you not to raise your voice like that in my courtroom again as for you Mr. Turner she is right I hardly think a reputable young woman such as Ms. Benoit would lie about being abused as a teenager to get a guy to help her adopt a baby" the judge intervened.

"Ok the subject will be dropped"

"What do you do for a living Mr. Cena?"

"I am a professional wrestler contracted by the World Wrestling Entertainment" he replied still reeling from the fact that anyone could honestly believe that Ashley could make up such a horrible lie … she wasn't like Kelly.

"So you beat people up for a living" Turner began to pace by now.

"Some may say that but it takes a lot more work than that. People actually go to schools and train for years so people such as yourself can say we beat people up but there is a lot more to it than that we have to choreograph everything down to the finest detail to make sure ourselves and our opponents walk out of that ring alive. Take a simple body slam if done poorly someone can loose consciousness, hit their head and suffer brain damage, so everything has to be perfect"

"Very enlightening" Turner said dryly.

John clenched and unclenched his fists to keep himself from lunging at the man in front of him.

"Would you consider yourself a good influence to the boy?"

"Yes I would consider my self a good influence to **Phinnigan**" John emphasized Phin's name "just the other day my friend Randy and I sat and watched the Alvin and the Chipmunks movie 3 times in a row because Phinnigan and Randy's son Dean wanted to watch it again and again and I don't drink or smoke around him and when he is within hearing range I try not to curse. Both Ashley and I make sure he eats healthy foods instead of junk and we also take the time to help him learn about the world around him"

"How well would you say you know Phinnigan?"

"Well how well does anyone really know a 1 year old?" John countered "I know the simple things like his favorite food and how to get him to sleep at night and I think that is all any parents really knows when their children are that small"

"How much time would you say you spend with Phinnigan?"

"Well I travel a lot but I would say maybe 3 days a week if I'm lucky but I call him every night and we talk for about 30 minutes before bedtime" John explained.

"No further questions" Turner sat down.

"Ms. Anderson do you have anything to add?" the judge asked.

"No your honor I think everything that needs to be said has" Charlotte said shuffling around the papers she had in front of her.

"Mr. Cena you may step down"

John didn't have to be told twice he returned to his seat and without really noticing it he reached over and took Ashley hand in his own. Shane didn't miss it though, he waited for Ashley to remove her hand from John's but she didn't. So Shane sat back and crossed his arms vowing to himself to talk to Ashley about it later.

Charlotte was up again and this time she called Phinnigan's birth mother to the stand. She was nervous anyone could tell that. Although she tried to compose herself the best she could Ashley could see her nervously shivering from where she was sitting. She felt a pang of sympathy, she seemed so young to have to be going through this.

"Would you please state your name for the court?" Charlotte asked softly also sensing the nervousness.

"Alexandria Whitley ma'am" her voice was soft with a heavy accent.

"May I call you Alexandria?"

"Yes"

"How old are you Alexandria?"

"I'll be 18 in September"

Ashley swore under her breath, she knew Phinnigan's birth mother had been young but she hadn't thought that she was that young. She was still a child herself, it all seemed to make sense in Ashley's mind now.

"So it's safe to say you were about 16 when you gave birth to the baby correct?"

"Yes ma'am I was really young when I had him"

"Why did you leave him in a parking lot?"

"We … I mean Sean and me … we didn't know what else to do we were still in high school and there was no way either of us were ready to take care of a baby at our age and we got scared"

"Did your parents know about the pregnancy?"

"No we kept it a secret the whole time … we weren't thinking clearly we were just really scared and didn't know what else to do but having had some time to think about it we now know that it was reckless to leave him outside where anything could happen to him"

"You said you were too young to take care of him … what about now you are still very young"

"After we left the baby it took my boyfriend Sean and I a long time to finally tell our parents the truth but when we finally did they were very supportive and wanted to help us get our son back"

"But you do realize that if Ms. Benoit and Mr. Cena hadn't found the baby he probably wouldn't have survived"

"Yes and I am very grateful that they did find him and that they gave him a good home until now but we are his rightful parents and he should be with his family"

"But what about the family he already has … what about the two step-brothers who Phinnigan lives with what would you like Ms. Benoit and her boyfriend Shane tell them"

"Well what about my family don't they have the right to acknowledge their own flesh and blood" Alexandria's voice rose a few octaves.

"That is not for me to decide" Charlotte replied calmly "but are you sure you want to take on this responsibility don't you want to go to collage and do things everyone your age does before having to take care of a child"

"Of course I do … it's just … I can't do this anymore" Alexandria began to cry "I don't want to take Phinnigan away from his family they obviously have more love than I can give him right now in my life … I never wanted to take him out of the home he was in now my parents wanted him back neither me nor Sean know how to take care of a baby so why not let him stay where he is"

"With that being said I guess I have no choice but to grant the wishes of the birth mother" the judge said "Phinnigan will remain with his adoptive family"

Much like she had promised Ashley dropped to her knees and thanked the lord. She sat like that for a few moments just letting everything sink in. She stood up and was greeted with John's huge arms wrapping themselves around her in a fierce hug. After much hugging and kissing and celebrating with everyone Ashley and John were able to go get their son again.

Phinnigan was waiting for the outside in courtroom he got excited when he saw his mother and ran to hug her. Ashley scooped him up into her arms and vowed to never let go.

"We won baby boy we won" she kissed him cheek.

"Hey buddy" John came over and kissed the top of his son's head "you get to stay with us for good"

Out of the corner of her eye Ashley could see Alexandria and her family leaving. She handed the baby to John.

"Alexandria" Ashley called out. The young girl turned around.

Ashley reached into her messenger bag and pulled out a cream colored album.

"I wanted to thank you for what you did in there … I know it wasn't easy but we will be forever grateful to you and your family" Ashley said with a smile.

"It's us who should be grateful to you if it wasn't for you he wouldn't be alive today and I think living with that would be even worse than knowing he's with another family"

"I wanted you to have this … it's an album from his first bath till his first birthday it's not much but it's still something to remember him by" she held the album out to the young woman.

She smiled and accepted the album before holding it close to her heart.

"Thank you"

With that they parted ways, Ashley returned back to her family and they all gave her pats on the back for what they deemed as a selfless gesture.

"Celebration party at our house" Ashley announced.

The party was hopping at the McMahon-Benoit home. Liquor was being passed around like there was no tomorrow. Ashley found herself reaching into the fridge to get her first beer of the night.

"How many of them have you had tonight?" Shane asked wrapping his arms around her waist from behind.

"First one" she flashed him her pearly whites.

"Promise me you will take it easy tonight"

"I'll only have one beer … you have my word"

"Thank you" he gave her a kiss on the cheek.

Ashley did keep her promise she only had one beer so technically she did not lie to Shane but along with the one beer she also did 5 shots of tequila. So to say she was feeling good would be an understatement.

Ashley climbed up onto a nearby table and cleared her throat. The music that had been playing was turned down.

"I just wanna thank everyone for celebrating with us today" she drunkenly slurred "I love you all so much"

"Take it off" someone from the back of the house yelled.

"Well if you insist" she began unbuttoning her top.

Shane already knew this couldn't be good he roughly snatched Ashley down from the table and began re-buttoning all the buttons his drunken girlfriend had undone.

"Stop being a killjoy Shane"

"Ashley you are embarrassing the both of us in front of everyone" Shane yelled "just sit here and try to sober up"

"Fine" Ashley huffed taking a seat.

With one more disgusted look Shane walked away leaving Ashley to her thoughts.

"You ok kid?" John asked having a seat next to Ashley.

"Shane is being stupid"

"I kinda have to agree with him I mean you almost gave everyone in the house a free show" John grinned "not that I would have minded"

"I'm sure you wouldn't have" she rolled her eyes "you know John you are the only person who really gets me"

"You aren't exactly hard to get" he said.

Before he could utter another word Ashley almost lunged at him claiming his lips with her own. He could taste the tequila and if he hadn't already known she was drunk her would know now. His first instinct was get fight her off because she was his friend's girlfriend and she was drunk but he loved her too much to fight her off so even though it was wrong he didn't really seem to care.

Shane went to go get Ashley some water and when he walked back over his heart broke to see his girlfriend making out with her ex-boyfriend. He dropped the cup of water he had been carrying. He walked away because if he stayed he would have made a scene. He could only forgive so much and he wasn't sure he could forgive this.


	23. Chapter 23

_Chapter 23: What Would You Do?_

A 6 week stint in rehab turned into a 6 month stay. At the end of the 5th week Ashley received a letter from Shane saying that he and his wife had reconciled and that he was moving back in with her. He also told her he was leaving her the house in New Jersey. After she had gotten that letter she checked herself out and went to the nearest bar and got loaded. Hence she was thrown back in rehab. She had learned that she had a lot of anger built up inside of her, she was mad at her father for abandoning her, she was mad at John for breaking her heart, and she was mad at Shane for ending things in a letter. But most of all she was mad at herself for letting things get so far. She missed her son terribly and even though he did visit and John was constantly sending her pictures it wasn't the same. She had missed her son's 2nd birthday but she knew it was better this way Phinnigan needed his mom to be healthy mentally and physically before she was able to be with him again.

It was a crisp September day when Ashley walked out into the sunlight knowing that she could finally go home. Although she had no idea where her home would be. She knew that she wasn't about to live in the Jersey house anymore. She did make a pit stop in Jersey to pack up her stuff but then she was off again.

There was a knock on the door. John looked at his alarm clock it read 3:30 thinking that maybe he had dreamed it he put his head back down on his pillow and closed his eyes. But he head the knock again, no he definitely didn't dream it. Mumbling incoherent things he got up and made his way through the dark house. He tripped once over one of Phinnigan's toy cars biting back the need to yell he quickly found a light and switched it on. He opened the door and was ready to scream at whoever was standing behind it.

"I need a place to crash and I couldn't think of anywhere else to go" Ashley told him.

"Come in" he stepped aside to allow her into his home.

She dropped her bags next to the couch and had a seat on his couch and he chose to sit in front of her on the coffee table.

"How did you get here?" he asked.

"Taxi, plane, ... another taxi" she replied tiredly.

"Why didn't you tell me you were getting released today Phinnigan and I would have come to pick you up?" he asked.

"I'm not useless John I can do some things for myself" she snapped at him "just because Shane left me doesn't make me some broken object"

"He left you?" John asked.

"Yeah and he didn't have the decency to tell me to my face he wrote it in a letter"

"You wanna talk about it?" he asked.

"No I wanna sleep" she replied with a yawn.

"I don't have any of the guest rooms prepared so you'll have to sleep in my room with me tonight" he said.

"Any reason you can get to get me into bed with you"

He grinned "I'll be on my best behavior and first thing tomorrow I will make up one of the guest rooms ... your normal room was turned into Phinnigan's room"

"I wanna see him" she stood up and made her way to her son's room.

She walked into her son's bedroom and took in the whole race car theme. Phinnigan was sound asleep in his race car bed. He had kicked the blankets off of himself so Ashley went over and fixed them. He looked so peaceful, his mouth was slightly open and his blue binky was laying close to him. She kissed his cheek before leaving her baby boy to his sweet dreams. John was watching from the door way.

"I missed him so much" she said shutting the door behind her.

"He missed you too ... everyday was mommy this and mommy that"

"Well Mr. Cena I'm exhausted so lets go to bed"

"Now you're talking"

"What happened to being on your best behavior?" she asked with hands on her hips.

"Hey it isn't everyday I have a hot chick in my bed"

Ashley began to laugh "you almost had me going"

"What are you trying to say Ms. Benoit"

"I'm trying to say you are a whore ... come to think of it your sheets better be clean" she warned him.

"Brand new ... this is the first time I've even slept in them"

"Damn too bad I don't have my black light with me"

"What no trust?" he asked in a mock shocked tone.

"Don't even start with me cause I only like you so much" she replied.

"Oh I think you like me more than you want to admit"

"Not even in your best wet dream"

"You assume I dream about you" he countered.

"I don't have to assume I already know"

"You have spent too much time with Randy and now his cockiness is rubbing off on you" John said.

"Good night John" she said walking away from him.

He gave her enough time to change into pajamas and get into bed. When he entered the room she was already in bed. He climbed into the bed with her and instinctively wrapped his arms around her.

"Umm I don't think so Sparky remove yourself" she said.

"What I'm a little cold"

"We're in Florida pendejo so I know you are lying"

"I thought we agreed not to use words I don't understand" he whined.

"Gah! Just go to sleep already!" she exclaimed.

He rolled over and closed his eyes. Ashley couldn't sleep so she just laid there thinking about everything. Was she really sharing a bed with John at this very second. It was nothing new she had shared a bed with John many times before but this time it felt different. She missed Shane and even though he had ended things she still felt wrong about being in bed with her ex-boyfriend. But for the time being this was her life so she'd better get used to it.


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24: Have a Little Faith in Me

Ashley woke up the next morning, she opened her eyes and looked in John's direction. He was still sound asleep but he wasn't alone Phinnigan had somehow crawled into bed with them, he was holding onto John's shirt while his head rested against John's shoulder. She carefully got up hoping that she wouldn't wake either of them up. She decided to make pancakes for John and Phinnigan but John had no food in his house at all. Rolling her eyes and muttering things under her breath she grabbed some clothes and headed to the store.

John woke up sometime later. He smiled as he gazed over to the spot where Ashley had last been. His smiled turned into a frown when he saw she wasn't there. Phinnigan was just waking up.

"Morning buddy" John said giving his son a kiss "you really need to stop getting out of bed in the middle of the night to sleep with daddy"

Phinnigan just looked at him and gave him a little smile. He still had his binky in his mouth.

"It's morning so hand nummi over" John said holding out his hand.

"My nummi" he said.

"Give it to me"

Phinnigan finally relented and handed over his binky over to his father, although he wasn't very happy about it. John had been cutting down time Phinnigan could have his binky because the dentists had told him that too much time with a binky could hurt Phinnigan's teeth. John got up and picked the toddler up as well.

"Did you see who was here to see you yet?" John asked.

"No" Phinnigan shook his head.

"Well let's see if we can find our house guest" John and Phinnigan left the bedroom and went to search the house.

After searching every room and still not finding Ashley he was beginning to think that maybe he had dreamed that Ashley had been there. The front door opened and Ashley appeared holding an arm full of groceries.

"Good you are awake help me bring stuff in" she said placing the bags on the counter "I woke up this morning with the intentions of making you guys breakfast but you have no food so I borrowed the charger"

"You drove the charger?" John asked a little afraid of what they state of his car would be like when he went outside … he wasn't a big fan of other people driving his cars.

"Relax unlike you whose insurance is probably through the roof I am a very responsible driver"

"Me and the insurance company are on good terms at the moment" John insisted.

"Key words … at the moment"

"Mommy uppie" Phinnigan held out his arms for him mother to pick him up.

"Hey my baby" Ashley kissed her son's cheek "mommy got all your favorite foods while she was at the store"

"Hey what about me?" John asked.

"Yes I got some stuff for you too"

"Sweet" John left to collect the rest of the shopping bags.

"Your daddy is an idiot" Ashley told Phinnigan.

After everything was put away Ashley made everyone chocolate chip pancakes and eggs. Ashley watched as John and Phinnigan ate, she was shocked it seemed like neither of them seemed to have eaten a home cooked meal in a while. They both were shoveling food into their mouths.

"Slow down both of you" she scolded them.

"Sorry" John said with a mouth full of food.

"Oh that was attractive ... you sure must hit it off with the ladies" she rolled her eyes.

"Hey once upon a time I won you over" he pointed out.

"I have no idea what I was thinking back then" she kidded him.

"Ha frickin ha"

Phinnigan stared from his mother to his father. He seemed a little overwhelmed to see them both in the same room talking. Ashley seemed to notice his distress, she took him out of his highchair and sat him in her lap.

"Did you enjoy your breakfast baby?" she asked him.

"Yes" he replied.

"He's really starting to talk up a storm" John said "sometimes it's hard to get him to stop"

"That's really good I was kinda nervous that he would freak out about being moved around again ... you know being here with you alone"

"The first few nights were rough, he looked everywhere for you but after time he seemed to get used to it"

"Well he never has to worry about being away from his mommy ever again" she vowed kissing the top of his head.

"Eww" he swiped his hand over his head.

"What mommy can't kiss you anymore"

"No" he replied crinkling his nose in disgust.

"But mommy is going to cry if she can't kiss her baby anymore" she rubbed her eyes in a pathetic attempt to make Phinnigan think she was crying.

"Hey Phin come here" John beckoned his son over.

Phin hopped off his mother' lap and made his way over to John.

"Come closer daddy wants to tell you a secret" Phinnigan inched closer to his father. Phinnigan grinned as he took his sweet time going to see what his father wanted. John finally grabbed him when he was close enough and Phinnigan let out a squeal of delight. He was hoping that he and his father would get to play wrestle now, which had become one of his new favorite hobbies after napping and playing with his trucks of course. His pale green eyes shone with excitement. John leaned in close so he could whisper in Phinnigan's ear.

"Sometimes it's ok to let your mommy give you kisses buddy" he whispered "just don't tell anyone about it"

Phinnigan nodded and placed his hand over his mouth which meant to him that he wasn't about to tell anyone about the "fatherly wisdom" John had just given him.

"'restle" Phinnigan said.

"You wanna wrestle buddy?" John asked. Phinnigan nodded and ran to his room to grab his toy championship belt.

"I have challenged that boy to about 5 rematches and he beats me every time ... he's the undisputed living room champion"

"That's my boy" Ashley replied amused.

"'restle daddy 'restle" Phinnigan commanded running back into the room with his toy WWE title belt slung over his shoulder.

"Ok one match but then I have to help mommy with the dishes" he said.

"Otay daddy one"

Ashley shook her head as she watched both of her "men" take off into the other room. She got up herself and stood in the doorway as Phinnigan nailed John in the chest with punches. John groaned and pretended like the hits were effective. Ashley couldn't help but laugh. John was pretending to be out on the ground when Phinnigan climbed up onto a nearby chair and delivered a perfect leg drop from it. Ashley stood there with her mouth open in shock. John didn't seem prepared for the impact because he suddenly sucked in air as the 2 year old landed directly in the middle of his chest. Phinnigan went for the pin so Ashley decided to act as the referee. She got down and counted ONE ... TWO ... THREE.

"Yay! I win" Phinnigan grabbed his title belt and began to jump up and down next to John who was still trying to recover from having the wind knocked out of him.

"You ok?" Ashley asked extending her hand to help him up.

"No" John wheezed taking her hand. She helped pull him back onto his feet.

"Where did he learn that?" she asked.

"I have no idea" John said, his voice was starting to return to normal.

"Hey Champ get over here" Phinnigan walked over to her and Ashley kneeled so she was his level "no more leg drops until you are at least 12"

"Otay mommy" Ashley playfully whacked Phinnigan on his butt.

Phinnigan grabbed some of his toys from the corner of the room and had a seat on the floor playing.

"Now Mr. Cena I believed you said you'd help me with the dishes"

Ashley pushed John towards the kitchen. She washed the dishes while John dried them.

"First thing Monday morning I am having someone come and look at that dishwasher" John declared "what good is the damn thing if we can't use it"

"I think it's fun doing the dishes the old fashioned way" she replied cheerfully.

"I'm sure you do" he rolled his eyes.

The phone rand and Ashley wiped her hands on her pants. She picked up the phone and hit the talk button before putting the phone to her ear.

"Cena residence ... Ashley speaking"

"Ashley you weren't the person I was expecting to talk to but this works too, this is Sister Agnes ... you remember me correct?"

"Yeah of course I do" Ashley replied nervous as to where this conversation could be going.

"Is John with you?" she asked.

"Yeah sure just let me put the phone on speaker" Ashley hit the speaker phone button and returned the phone to the cradle.

"I'm glad I got you both together" Sister Agnes said thankful she didn't have to try to track Ashley down.

"Yeah ... it's a temporary thing" Ashley said "so what can we do ya for?"

"Well I have some news" Sister Agnes began.

"Please do not tell us someone else is coming after Phinnigan" Ashley said with fear in her voice. John wrapped an arm around her.

"No, not at all don't worry Phinnigan is officially yours but this news does involve Phinnigan's family"

"Please don't tell me those two kids had another baby" John said.

"They requested that the child be placed with the same family as Phinnigan if that was possible"

John took his arm from around Ashley and began waving it in the arm in a disagreeing manner. Ashley raised an eyebrow at him and crossed her arms.

"No more kids" John mouthed.

"Can we call you back after we discuss this"

"Of course ... you have my number just let me know what you decide"

"No more kids!" John reiterated once she had completely hung up the phone.

"What's wrong with another kid?" Ashley asked.

"Double the mess, double the frustration ... double the dirty diapers"

"Double the kisses and hugs ... double the I love you daddy"

"No" John insisted "I'm not trying to be the bad guy but things are very strange right now and the last thing we need right now is another kid complicating everything" he rationalized.

"You grew up with 4 brothers correct and I had two ... now what if someone decided that you weren't going to be able to grow up with your brothers"

"Well the situation is different I'm not adopted and neither are my brothers"

"Well Phinnigan is adopted and now you just want to dismiss his little brother or sister ... why are we even having this conversation Randy is more than enough evidence that they trust single parents I just thought you'd want to do this together as a family"

"Oh hell no don't pull the family card" John snapped.

"Oh hell yes I'll fuckin pull the family card if I fuckin want to" she raised her voice a little "I'm the only one who seems to care".

"Oh ... I don't care huh well I have been busting my ass off trying to take care of that little boy in there while you were off in rehab ... but I don't care" he too raised his voice a little . Neither of them wanted to alert Phinnigan to the fighting.

"I needed to go into rehab so I didn't potentially hurt myself or Phinnigan and you didn't have to keep him this long, you could have given him to Randy or my dad ... you chose to keep him"

"It wasn't a choice I had to think about I love my son and I would do anything for him" John said.

"They need to be together John and if you don't want to do this then fine but I do and I'd like to think that you of all people knowing who I am and what I have been through would understand why I feel it is important for these two siblings to be together"

"This isn't an opportune time to be doing this ... we both have so much going on right now and I just don't think adding another child will be healthy"

"John I work from home ... besides how much more work can one more child be" she retorted with a hint of arrogance.

John rolled his eyes "Well call the woman up already we both know that no matter what I say you are going to do what you want anyways"

"Thank you John" she gave him a peck on the lips and a big hug "I promise nothing will change ... me and the kids will stay here till I find somewhere else and then we'll take it from there"

John frowned a little at the mention of her moving "Yeah, but mark my words you have no idea what you are getting into"

Ashley called Sister Agnes back and told her that they would be more than willing to accept Phinnigan's younger sibling into their "family". She also made the older woman promise not to reveal the gender of the baby until they reached the orphanage. She also wanted to set up a meeting with the birth parents to give them a little lecture on the use of birth control or just not having sex in general. Then she called Courtney and informed her that she was calling a "family" meeting. The original immediate family consisted of Ashley, John, Phinnigan, Randy and Dean. But Randy had added Courtney and for a while Ashley had added Shane but Shane was no longer in the picture so it would only be the "originals" and Courtney. Courtney lived around the corner from John's Tampa residence and that is how she and Randy had met. She was a newspaper photographer who Randy helped get a job with the WWE. Both Courtney and Randy happened to be at her home and agreed to be right over. Ashley and John wanted to get their opinions on what they were about to do. John was hoping that they would agree with him and Ashley wanted them to agree with her. But neither could make them decide what was the right thing to do. It was the impartiality that would make or break this argument. Only time would tell who would be right.


	25. Chapter 25

Title: Ride Of Your Life 

Author: Adrian Jade

Summary: One day you wake up and realize that everything you thought mattered to you doesn't. John Cena has a girlfriend who he thinks he loves and a best friend who he knows he will always love. What happens when on a random pit stop to a Walmart they find something that could change all of their lives. John needs to choose where his heart belongs.

Disclaimer: I own all the people that you don't recognize. Everyone else own themselves and their characters belong to the WWE.

Chapter 25: Just to See You Smile

"I can't believe me are really doing this again" Ashley couldn't seem to contain her giddy excitement any longer. She had a feeling that this new baby was going to be the one thing that she and John needed to make their lives complete ... well that and maybe significant others. Although Ashley wasn't really looking for love in her life right now after the way everything ended with Shane, she wasn't ready to just throw in the towel just yet.

She looked over at John to see that he was sound asleep. His head was slumped over just a little and his mouth was slightly open. His chest rose and fell in a slow relaxed manner. She smiled and rested her head against his shoulder closing her eyes as well. John opened his eyes when he felt her rest her head on his shoulder, a smile of contentment crossed his lips as he drifted off once again to the land of dreams. A flight attendant happened to be walking by, she stopped a took in the sight before her. She couldn't help but be awed at such a cute sight. She didn't know anything about the two individuals before her but she could sense the love between them. By the end of the flight Ashley was about ready to jump out of her skin with excitement. But she was also a little nervous as well ... were they doing the right thing by taking in another baby. She shook her head fiercely, there was nothing they could do about it now. John took his eyes off the road for a second to look over to see her sucking on her bottom lip, a habit she only had when she was worried or nervous.

"Everything is gonna be alright" he took her hand in his own and brought it to his lips. He kissed her hand softly and then just held it.

"I know everything is going to be ok I just can't help this nervous anticipation" she replied with a sigh.

"I'm kinda surprised that you allowed me to pick out the kid's name" John said trying to change the subject a little bit.

"Hey I named Phinnigan so I figured it was only fair ... what did you end up choosing?"

After 3 agonizing nights of reading the baby name books and looking over various baby name websites he picked out what he believed to be the two perfect names for each gender. He had grumbled to himself quite a lot as he did so, he still couldn't understand why Ashley wouldn't just let the nun tell them what gender the baby was.

"I still don't see why we couldn't find out if the baby was a girl or boy" he decided now was a well enough time to complain.

"Some people go 9 months without knowing I think we are more than capable of waiting 3 days ... besides not knowing makes this all the more fun" she said.

"Fun for you maybe" he muttered.

"So what did you pick out?" she asked once again.

He grinned as an idea formed in his mind "It's a surprise ... remember not knowing is fun"

She turned her head in his direction and shot him a look. He returned her look with a short look of his own. Once he returned his attention back to the road Ashley let her eyes take in John. He was wearing a dark gray t-shirt and a pair of jeans. Nothing special but for some reason John made it look so sexy. He wore his camouflage Red Sox hat backwards and much to Ashley's distaste he donned a pair of sunglasses that looked as if he stole them from one of the officers from the old television series Chips.

"Remind me why you are in my life"

"I have come to the conclusion that I am your comedic relief that and well I'm really hot so that helps out too"

"I love me ... who do you love?" she asked remembering her mother used to say that to her father whenever he got a little too full of himself.

"Hmm I'll get back to ya on that one"

Rolling her eyes she put her visor down so she could use the mirror to fix her hair. She pulled her shoulder length chestnut locks out of the ponytail in was in. Using her hands she smoothed down her hair before pulling the hair into a tight bun.'

"Does that hurt when you do that?" John asked.

"Every once and a while I get a headache from it" she replied "I think you need to take the next exit"

"I remember how to get to the place thank you" he got annoyed when people tried to give him directions "I drove the last time we went too remember"

"Geez I was trying to help you ... what the hell" she sunk back in her chair and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Sorry I'm just a little on edge" he apologized.

"About the baby?" she asked.

"No this is about me" he replied "I'm working through something right now and I just don't know how to deal"

"Are you alright ... do you want to talk about it?"

"Not yet"

"I'm here for you" she said leaning over to give him a comforting kiss on the cheek.

He gave her a small smile before turning his complete attention to the road. Before they knew it they were at the orphanage. Everything was in slow motion to John. He felt as if he was watching himself and Ashley walk into the building. Ashley was holding his hand, he could feel the warmth of her hand but even that didn't help with the floaty feeling he seemed to be experiencing.

"You ok?" he could hear Ashley asking him the question but when he opened his mouth nothing came out so he closed it again.

Ashley gave her friend a perplexed look and placed the palm of her hand on his cheek to see if maybe he wasn't feeling well and had a fever. But he didn't have a fever, his skin was cool to the touch. That in itself worried Ashley because they were in North Carolina during the worst heat wave of the year.

"I'm worried about you" she said.

"I'll be fine ... my mind is just all over the place right now" he tried his best to assure her.

The moment they entered the building all the kids seemed to come out of the woodwork. They all wanted to meet John. He did his best to give all the children equal amounts of his time. All the kids were asking him questions and wanting for him to sign things. Ashley smiled as she stood off to the side of the room and watched as he interacted with all his young fans. The nuns had come out of the office upon hearing all the commotion.

"Ashley, how long have you and John been here" Sister Michelle asked "I must apologize for keeping you guys waiting"

"Don't worry we have been here 7 minutes tops and I think John is enjoying himself more than he is willing to admit"

John was smiling as he gave a little girl his autograph. She little blond haired girl hugged him and then ran off to put her autograph somewhere safe.

"Ok children John needs to come with me now" Sister Michelle said.

There was a chorus of kids complaining. John stood up from the couch he had just recently taken a seat in.

"I'll sign more autographs later I promise" he told the kids. An eruption of cheers emitted from all the children.

"I'm sorry about that John but it's not everyday the kids get to meet someone they watch on television" Sister Michelle said once they were in the office at the back of the building.

"It's alright I enjoyed making the kids happy" he replied.

"Where is Sister Agnes?" Ashley asked.

"Today just happens to be her day off ... once a month we each get one day to go out and have fun so to speak"

"We brought you guys a few pictures of Phinnigan and Dean so you can see how big they have gotten" she reached into her pocket and pulled out the pictures she had brought with her.

"Wow look at Dean, he looks so happy" Sister Michelle smiled as she looked the pictures over.

"He just started school this year and from what I have been told he loves it" Ashley said.

"That is very good to hear Dean was one of our favorites and I'm sure everyone here will be happy to know he is doing so well"

"So where is the baby" John asked in an almost aggravated tone.

"Excuse him Sister he suffers from what I would like to call Jackass syndrome" Ashley said giving John an incredibly dirty look.

"Well the baby is still with the birth family so we just have to wait for them to get here so you can meet your new child"

"So do you know right now if the baby is a boy or a girl?" John asked.

"You weren't informed?" Sister Michelle replied confused.

"I asked not to be told" Ashley informed her "I don't want to know till the baby gets here"

Sister Michelle looked out the window and grinned "Looks like your wait is over the mother and baby are here"

"Well let's get this thing started" John said standing up. It was then Ashley noticed he seemed to be trying not to put too much weight on his left leg.

Ashley stood up as well and all 3 adults met with Alexandria in the foyer of the building. The young mother looked exhausted.

"I want to thank you for raising both children together" Alexandria said upon seeing Ashley and John "I know my children are in good hands"

She handed the blanket wrapped baby over to Ashley. Ashley removed the blanket away from the baby's face so she could get a better look at the newborn. The baby was wearing a pink outfit so this ruled out any possibility of her being a boy. She had a full head of dark hair.

"It's a girl John" she informed her friend.

John walked over to where Ashley and the baby were. He too took a good look at the baby that would soon be his daughter. His breath caught in his throat as he took in the infants beauty. Although he would never admit it out loud he was hoping the baby would be a girl. Now he had his son to follow in his footsteps and he had a little girl also.

"Mariah ... Mariah Emmaline Faith" John whispered. Only Ashley had heard him, tears welled up in her eyes as she heard the name John had picked out. Emmaline was her mother's name.

"So what's Phinnigan's little sister's name?" Sister Michelle asked.

"Mariah Emmaline Faith" John grinned broadly "but we'll call her Faith"

"I think that name suits her" Alexandria agreed "and before I get a lecture about making the same mistake twice you'll be happy to hear that Sean and I broke up and I don't plan on having any more children any time soon"

Ashley handed the baby to John.

"I think we should take a walk" Ashley suggested to Alexandria.

"John and I will draw up the paperwork for when you two get back"

Both young women stepped outside the confines of what had once been an old school. It looked as it had seen better days but all that mattered was the children inside it's walls were happy. They didn't walk very far there was a park up the street with a big stone wall out in front. Ashley hopped up onto the wall and had a seat Alexandria did the same thing.

"You look like you needed to talk I know you don't know me but I will listen if you need to talk"

"I just feel like the scum of the earth ... who just leaves their newborn baby in a parking lot" Alexandria said breaking down a little.

"You were young and scared and you panicked" Ashley did her best to comfort the young woman.

"I never wanted to be pregnant so young and then to do the same thing again it's just pure stupidity"

"We all make mistakes Alex it's a part of life how you learn from your mistakes that is what is important"

"I just keep thinking what would have happened if you had never found Phinnigan"

"Well you will never have to know because we did find Phinnigan who by the way is doing fine ... the other day he leg dropped his father from one of the living room chairs"

"I never wanted to take Phinnigan away from you my parents were the ones who insisted on suing for custody" she admitted.

"I'm just lucky that you decided to end things when you did because I don't think I could have lived without that little boy in my life, he's my whole world"

Ashley gray eyes brightened as she thought about her son. "He's loud and he breaks things and he makes a huge mess wherever he goes but all he has to do is come in and go I love you mommy and it's all over I could be mad as hell at him for breaking a window in the living room but he just has to smile and I forget everything"

"Sounds like you really love him" Alexandria smiled.

"I really do it's so hard to explain"

"So if you don't mind me asking what is going on with you and John?"

"Believe me when I figure it out I'll let you know I would describe us as people who share the same living space ... I guess you could say we are friends I mean we share a son and I don't think there is any other person who knows me better than John and maybe my other best friend Randy but me and John have done the dating thing and it never seems to work out"

"Damn girl he's hot enough to make the risk"

"Yeah he is but sometimes people need more" Ashley mused.

"So what about you?" Ashley asked "how did you and Sean end?"

"Well he wanted to keep Faith and all I wanted to do was be a normal girl my age I want to go to collage and make something of myself before I want to settle down and have a family and Sean couldn't understand that it was my body and I was the one who needed to make the decisions"

"Which is totally understandable" Ashley agreed.

"How is it that I have known Sean all my life and I've known you for like 2 seconds and you get me in a way he never could"

"I'm a woman I get these things"

"I'm glad someone does cause I feel like my whole entire family thinks I am nothing but some whore who can't do anything right"

"Don't let them get to you because the only person who can bring you down is you"

"I wish I had half of the purpose you possess" Alexandria remarked.

"Believe me when I was your age I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life but it comes with time a life experience. I have dealt with my own demons and I don't even pretend to be perfect but like I said what you take away from your mistakes means more than anything else in life"

"I think we should start heading back now John is probably wondering if we stranded him with the baby and went off to Vegas"

"Vegas that sounds nice right about now"

"Hey you are a mother of 2 now Vegas is completely out of the question"

"That's what we pay babysitters for maybe in a little while I can convince that cranky man I live with to relax and have some fun"

"I didn't want to say anything because I really don't know John but he seemed to either be in a lot of pain that he is trying to hide or really really angry"

"That's a toss up because he is kinda a hothead" then Ashley realized what she had just said "never around Phinnigan though mainly when he is in the ring"

"Oh that reminds me do you think I could get a picture and a couple of autographs I have these two cousins, Jackson and David who don't believe me when I say that John Cena adopted my son"

"Bragging rights huh" Ashley smirked "I'm sure John will be happy to I mean you did give birth to his daughter who I'm sure he's trying to think of ways to keep boys away from as we speak"

"I'm sure that she'll benefit from it in the long run"

"Oh I'm sure she will but you know how guys get"

Laughing as they went they began the journey back to the orphanage. They seemed to have bonded in the short time they had talked. Ashley owed this young woman so much more than she could ever repay.

"You know if I had the time and the room I'd take all these kids home"

"I'm sure John wouldn't care too much for that"

"You are probably right" she sighed "he likes kids well enough but he seems to like them even more when they leave"

"Well as long as he likes the two he's raising you can't really ask much more from him"

"Very true ... I have to admit though he has changed so much from the person he was 2 years ago I never thought that he would really want to be in Phinnigan's life and I was prepared to raise him on my own but John proved me wrong and I am glad to admit that"

John and Faith were sitting on the front steps waiting for them when they came back.

"John Cena it's hotter than hell out here bring that baby back inside" Ashley scolded him.

"Relax we have been out here for like 2 seconds I was just showing the baby the amazing scenery around here" he handed Faith to her mother and walked slowly back into the building.

"Men" Ashley huffed entering the building herself.

John was more than happy to sign the autographs for Alexandria and also take the picture.

"I have an idea" Ashley said "Sister Michelle can you take a picture of all of us together"

"Sure"

Ashley and Faith joined John and Alexandria for what would turn out to be one of the all time favorite photos for everyone involved.

"Say cheese everyone"

They all had smiles on their faces as the picture was snapped. Ashley and Alexandria traded all their information. Ash promised to send tons of pictures of both kids and the girl planned a get together in the near future.

"We want you to be a part of the kid's lives" Ashley had said.

"I'd love that" Alexandria replied deeply touched.

As they parted ways a new bond was formed. Alexandria would become a bigger part of the family than anyone could ever guess.


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 26: Let's Make a Memory

"Dad when are Auntie and Uncle gonna get here with the new baby cause I'm bored of waiting" Dean whined impatiently.

"Patience is a virtue" Randy chastised his son with a smile.

The young boy pouted and went to have a seat next to Courtney. Courtney gave him a kiss and asked him why he had such a long face.

"I'm bored Court" he whined again.

"Why don't you go play with Phinnigan?" Courtney suggested.

"He's taking a nap" the young boy sighed as his shoulders slumped a little.

"Go find Becky and see if she'll play with you" Courtney told him.

"Good idea" Dean took off to go find Becky.

"You are great with him" Randy said to his girlfriend as he took the spot Dean had vacated.

"It's easy he's cute" Courtney smiled.

Randy's blue eyes scanned the room before them. Different people mingled while waiting for John and Ashley to return home with the new baby. Courtney and Randy had been in charge of bringing all of Phinnigan's old baby furniture from the Jersey house to John's Tampa home. They had also taken it upon themselves to throw a very impromptu welcome home party.

"So when you talked to Ash earlier did she tell you the gender of the baby or the name?" Randy asked.

"Nope, she just said that they wanted to tell everyone at once when they got here" was Courtney's reply.

"Ash and her secrets" Randy rolled his eyes.

"You are just as bad as her sometimes"

Randy scoffed "I am not"

"Oh come on if Ashley woke up one day and decided to grow a penis she would be you"

Randy shuddered "Eww I don't want to think of my best friend like that"

He shuddered again and then was sent off into tiny spasms. He was thoroughly disgusted at the thoughts his girlfriend had just put into his mind.

"Oh calm down you big baby" she slapped him on the shoulder.

"Becky" Dean pulled at the hem of the young woman's shirt.

Becky, who had been having a very nice conversation with Carlito, looked down at the small boy with a smile.

"Yes how may I help you?" she asked.

"I'm bored ... you wanna play with me?"

"Gimme like 5 minutes and then I'll play with you ok" Becky told him.

"Sweet!" Dean exclaimed while walking away.

"Cute kid" Carlito said.

Becky smiled she loved listening to Carlito's deep accent.

"Why yes he is" Becky found herself agreeing with him.

"You shouldn't keep him waiting too long then" Carlito told her.

"Yeah I guess you are right I'll catch up with you later" she said with a sigh as she went to go find Dean.

She found him in the playroom, he was just putting a disk into John's PS2 when she entered the room.

"Are you supposed to be touching John's PS2?" she asked already knowing he was not allowed to touch it.

"No ... but all I did was put the disk in and Uncle John is home so he doesn't know"

"Well I can't argue with that logic I guess" Becky shrugged "so what are we playing?"

"Guitar Hero III" he replied grabbing the guitar controller.

"Have you ever played this game before?" she asked.

"Maybe" he replied just beginning to play a song.

30 minutes later it was clear to Becky that Dean was an expert on Guitar Hero. He had started off really badly so Becky thought that he was an easy target. But soon after she had discovered that she had been mistaken. Dean could play all the difficult songs without even breaking a sweat. Becky on the other hand could barely make it through a song.

"You are very bad at this game" Dean said with a laugh.

"Yeah well you are short" Becky retorted.

"I'm 5 you dummie of course I am littler than you ... you are a growed up"

"It's grown up sweetie" Becky corrected him.

"That's what I said growed up" Becky just shook her head.

"What time is it?" Dean asked.

"It's 4:30 in the afternoon" Becky said looking at her watch.

"What time are Auntie and Uncle getting home?" he asked.

"Their plane should be landing now so I'd say they will be here in roughly 20 minutes if there is no traffic"

"I can't wait to see the new baby" he grinned "now me and Phin have someone else to play with".

"You do realize that the baby is too little for you to play with right now and you'll probably have to wait a year or two until he or she is big enough to actually play with"

"Aww man are you serious?" he asked disappointed.

"Yeah the new baby is a newborn probably weighing somewhere between 4 and 9 pounds and you my friend probably weigh about 10 times as much"

"This sucks"

"Language little boy I swear your dad needs to watch what he says around you" Becky shook in head a little in disgust.

"My daddy didn't teach me that word you did Becky I heard you use it when you were one the phone with one of your friends" he smiled at her "I also heard you say you like my dad's ass ... whatever an ass is"

"You are an evil little child do you know that!" Becky exclaimed "little boys shouldn't be listening to grown folks conversations"

"Please Becky you are only 19 so I know you aren't referring to yourself as grown" Courtney remarked from the doorway.

"I'm certainly a lot more grown up then he is"Becky stated indignantly.

"Court did you know that Becky likes Barney?" Dean asked giving his father's girlfriend a toothy grin.

"I do not!" Becky exclaimed.

"Yes you do ... I heard you talking to one of your friends and you said you wanted to give Edge a BJ doll"

Courtney's jaw hit the floor and Becky just stood there not knowing what else to do. A blush rose across her caramel colored skin.

"Phinnigan has a BJ doll ... you aren't gonna steal it from him and give it to Edge are you cause that would be really mean"

"Dean, Phinnigan is awake why don't you play with him now"

"Ok" Dean took off to go find Phinnigan.

"That's it I'm moving out" Becky announced

"Yeah and where are you gonna go because last time I checked mom and your dad sent you to live with me because your ass got into too much trouble back in Buffalo"

"I can find someone who doesn't have little boys who like to listen in on other people's phone conversations"

"He's a 5 year old boy Becky cut him some slack" Courtney remarked "and besides he won't be living with us much longer"

"Why what's going on?" Becky asked confused.

"After the party I'm breaking up with Randy" Courtney announced.

"What ... why???" was all Becky could get out of her mouth.

"When you get older you will understand" Courtney said walking away.

Becky stood there taking in the bombshell that had just been placed upon her. She couldn't understand why her sister was throwing away such a good thing. She just shook her head and went to join the rest of the guests at the surprise baby shower.

Ashley's father looked out the window for the third time in the past 20 minutes. He then glanced at his watched and sighed.

"Just a little bit excited aren't we?" Randy asked having a seat next to the older man.

"I just really hope this baby is a girl" he admitted glancing out the windows again.

"Why do you want a girl so badly?" Randy asked.

"Because I have been around guys all my life so when my kids were born I wanted a bunch of daughters but I only got one which I am thankful for everyday so I think it's only fair to have a bunch of granddaughters running around"

"Dude you are a total softy"

The older man looked out the window once again and when the younger man wasn't looking he brought back his fist and hit the younger man hard on the shoulder.

"What the hell was that for?" Randy yelped jumping out of his seat.

"What was that about me being a softy" the elder man grinned showing off the famous gap that he wore with pride.

"Hey there here" Randy yelled as he looked out the window "everyone hide"

The lights were dimmed and all the guests scattered around to find places to hide. Ashley was the first one to enter the house.

"Randy ... Courtney ... Becky where the hell are you three" Ashley yelled upon entering the dark house.

"Surprise!" the lights were turned back on and all the guests revealed themselves.

John was standing behind her holding the baby carrier. The covering was over it so people still had no idea whether the baby was a boy or a girl.

"So don't you think we should know the gender of the guest of honor?" Courtney asked.

Ashley took the carrier from John and placed it gently on the couch. "Well if you all must know".

She took the baby out of the carrier and cradled her in her arms. Everyone still had no idea whether the baby was a boy or a girl because they had dressed the baby in an all white outfit.

"Everyone I would like to introduce to you the newest member of our family our daughter Mariah Emmaline Faith Cena"

"Yes!" Ashley's father exclaimed coming very close to jumping in the air with excitement.

"I'm glad I could make you so happy daddy" Ashley rolled her eyes.

"Well people what are we waiting for let's party" John clapped his hands together in anticipation.

By the end of the night everyone who remained at the Cena residence was exhausted. Ashley sat next to John resting her head on his chest so she could hear his heartbeat.

"You know John I don't think I could have asked for anything better than this" she said.

"It was a pleasant surprise and I'm sure our daughter will appreciate having all those people around her" he replied sleepily.

"Oh I don't think so buddy you are on baby duty first" she smacked him lightly on the shoulder.

"But Ash I am exhausted" he tired to reason with her.

Ashley smirked as she handed him the baby monitor. "Have fun".

"And so it begins" John slumped down a little in his chair annoyed with the mother of his children. As he sat he took the opportunity to reflect upon his life and as a smile graced his lips he realized that he wouldn't change on thing about what had lead him to this point because as of right now at that very moment in time everything was perfect. But as so many people know all to well Perfection is just a word and it never last forever.

AN: This chapter is dedicated to Tiff. I luv ya girly always remember that.


	27. Chapter 27

_Chapter 27: Karma_

"Shh my angel it's time for bed" Ashley rocked 1 week old Faith.

Faith looked up at her mother with her big blue eyes. Although Ashley could tell Faith was exhausted the infant seemed to fighting to stay awake. Ashley wondered what Faith thought happened after she fell asleep because she refused to fall asleep.

"You aren't going to make this easy on me are you?" she asked the infant.

She placed the baby on her shoulder and began to rub her back. She gently rocked back and forth and began to sing the same song her mother sang to her when she was Faith's age, Amazing Grace. Much to her relief Faith finally fell asleep.

"Good night my little angel" she gently laid the baby in her bassinet and kissed her brow. She wrapped the blankets snugly around the infant before straightening up and turning on the night light by the door. She closed the door behind her with a tired sigh and went to go make herself a cup of green tea. She looked up in alarm as the front door swung open.. A scarlet faced Randy emerged from the darkness.

"Randy what the hell!" Ashley exclaimed her hand over her still racing heart.

"Sorry I'm just really pissed right now" he apologized walking closer to her.

Dean was asleep on his shoulder "Where can I put him?"

"Just put him in Phin's bed " Ashley told him.

Their eyes met for an instant before he left her to put his son to bed. She knew instantly that something was wrong.. She had known Randy long enough to be able to read his face, that and she could see the redness in his eyes that could only be from crying. She busied herself making another cup of tea for him. Randy reemerged from Phinnigan's bed room.

"I made you a cup of tea" she said offering it to him.

"Thanks" he replied emotionally exhausted.

"Let's go into the living room and talk" she suggested leading the way into the toy cluttered living room.

"You'll have to excuse the mess" she said scowling "it's impossible to clean up after a 2 year old and take care of an infant"

"It's fine believe me I have seen some of the hotel rooms you and John used to trash in your younger days"

"What can I say we were young and stupid ... John still is" a hint of a smile crossed her lips.

"So what happened?" she took a sip of tea and waited patiently for Randy to answer.

"You know if you had talked to me this morning I would have told you that this was supposed to be the happiest day of my life but that all turned to hell" he muttered bitterly.

She placed her hand on his arm in a comforting manner "What happened?" she asked again gently.

_Flashback_

"_Courtney I'm home" Randy entered his girlfriend's home with a bounce in his step and a whistle on his lips._

"_In the living room Randy" she called._

_He placed the bouquet of peach roses that he was holding behind his back and made his way to the other end of the house where his girlfriend was waiting for him. The somber look on her delicate features tipped him off right away. The broad smile he once wore was replaced with a look of concern and confusion. _

"_Here baby I have something for you" he showed her the flowers he had bought especially for her knowing that peach roses were her favorite._

_She made no motions to take the flowers out of his hands nor did she show any hint of pleasure in seeing them. Undeterred he took it upon himself to put the flowers in a vase and place them on the dining room table. She followed him, standing there in a baggy sweatshirt with her arms wrapped tightly around her body._

"_We need to talk" she finally said._

_He glanced at her with curiosity. It was never good when anyone said those three dreaded words and he expected this time wouldn't be any different._

"_About what?" he feigned ignorance._

"_You and me" she said looking at the ground._

"_What about you and me?" he asked not sure about what was going on._

"_I ... I can't do this anymore Randy ... I'm ending this here and now" she stated firmly._

"_Did I do something wrong?" he asked completely blindsided by her sudden dismissal of him._

"_No Randy you didn't do anything"_

"_So why are you doing this?" he asked devastated by that point._

"_Because I can't deal with this whole instant family thing anymore, you are a great guy and Dean is amazing and I really do love him ... it's just that I'm not his mom and I shouldn't have to be"_

"_So you are dumping me because I have a son?"_

"_Randy you made the decision to become a father but I didn't decide to be a mother and it's unfair to expect me to be one" she explained "it's only a matter of time before that happens ... you and Ashley and John, you all decided to adopt kids all that is all well and good but I didn't adopt Dean and right now I don't want to be a part of a family"_

"_I'm sorry but did I actually just hear what I think I just heard because if I did then that has to be the biggest load of horseshit I had ever heard in my life"_

"_It's the truth Randy I can't help the way I feel" she tried to justify herself._

"_Come on Court you don't mean any of this ... we are good together and I know if we just sit down and talk this out you'll see that" he tried to reason with her._

"_No Randy I've felt like this for some time now and I thought maybe if I ignored how I felt it would go away but I'm miserable and I actually drove myself to do something I swore I would never do ... I cheated on you Randy and you know what I feel no remorse in doing so because when I'm with him I'm free, I have no worries or responsibilities"_

"_How could you do that to us ... to me" he didn't bother to hide his tears._

"_It just happened and now you know so I would appreciate if you would pack up your stuff and just leave me alone" she turned her back on him and walked away._

"_I'm grabbing my son and I'll be back for the rest of our stuff tomorrow" he informed her._

_Randy grabbed Dean who was sound asleep in his bedroom. He didn't even bother to take his truck. He walked the two blocks to John's house and used his key to let himself into the house._

_end _

"So now you know the whole story" Randy remarked miserably after he finished telling the story.

"Oh sweetie I am so sorry" Ashley really couldn't think of anything else to say.

"And you want to know the worst part of this whole thing is?" he asked reaching into his pocket " I was going to propose to her tonight" . He pulled out the box and showed Ashley the ring he had picked out.

"Rans I know you are devastated right now but you know what karma will come around and bite her in the ass don't you worry. It's her loss she didn't see what a wonderful man she had in front of her and if you weren't like one of my brothers I'd totally date you myself because you are one of the very few good men out there"

He wiped the tears from his eyes. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him into and embrace. He rested his head against her shoulder and just let her hold him. He knew she was right of course but that didn't make the pain hurt any less.

"I really don't want to be alone right now" he finally said breaking away from her.

"I know I speak for both me and John when I say you and Dean are welcome to stay with us for as long as you want"

"Thanks Ash I don't know what I'd you without you and John"

"Well you will never have to know but for right now lets both try to get some sleep because I think we are both ready to collapse"

"Yeah I guess I didn't really notice how tired I was until right now" he yawned.

"Good night Randy" she kissed his temple "and don't worry just remember what I said karma is a funny thing"

"I'll try to remember that" he replied " it still hurts really bad but I'll live"

"That's my boy" she patted him on the back before leaving him to his thoughts.


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 28: Where The Heart Is

"You can do this ... you know you can" Ashley mentally coached herself. Today was the day she was giving her childcare proposal not only to the rest of the board members but also all the wrestlers as well.

Dressed in a pair of black pinstriped pants and a white collared shirt with a navy blue sweater vest over it she felt she could be deemed as a reliable member of the workforce. She had put her long burgundy locks into a tight bun and wore her glasses instead of the contacts she normally wore. She stood up to leave John's locker room where she had been camping out for the last half hour trying to muster up enough courage to speak in front of all those people, public speaking was not something she enjoyed doing ever. The last time she had to give a presentation was in collage and she had made herself so nervous she ended up passing out.

"You'll do fine" Randy assured her from his seat on the couch where he was watching TV with Phinnigan and Dean.

"He's right Ash you'll go out there and amaze them all and you know it" John agreed with his new house mate.

"Thanks you guys but I'm just way too nervous plus Shane is here tonight and I really just don't want to run into him"

"You knew you were going to have to face him sooner or later it might as well be now" Randy reasoned.

"Thank you for your words of wisdom Dr. Phil" Ashley rolled her eyes.

There was a knock on the door and all 3 adults looked up to see a very worried looking Becky enter the room. Ashley's eyes hardened at the sight of the young girl.

"Would it be alright if I talked to Randy?" Becky asked sheepishly.

Ashley looked over to Randy and he nodded letting her know that he would be ok. Reluctantly Ashley picked Faith up from her travel bassinet and placed her in her stroller.

"Come on boys let's get some ice cream" John suggested.

"Yay ice cream!" both boys exclaimed jumping up from the couch in excitement.

"Come on Ash I'll buy you a sundae" John wrapped one arm around Ashley's waist and with the other guided both Ashley and Faith's stroller out of the room.

"I don't want a sundae" could be heard .

"Fine I'll buy you a frappe" 

"What the hell is a frappe?" she asked knowing that would irritate him.

"I don't even know you anymore" John stated appalled "you have been to my dad's house for years now and you don't know what a frappe is ... you disgust me"

"Oh my god man will you shut up about your gad damn frappes and yes I do know what one is I just wanted to piss you off and looks like it worked"

With that being said the door to the locker room closed but Randy and Becky could still hear John and Ashley bickering like a married couple all the way down the hall.

"Well I am at a loss for words ... what did you need to talk to me about?"

Becky shook her head to clear it "I'm almost afraid to ask this ... do you know what a frappe is?" she asked.

"Beats me" Randy replied shrugging his shoulders.

"Anyways the reason I wanted to talk to was I wanted you to know I do not support what Courtney did to you at all" Becky shook her head in disgust "you and Dean were the best things to happen to her and she just cast you aside like that"

"I appreciate what you are saying but I don't want to come between you and your sister"

"Believe me that skank isn't my sister anymore I am through with her shit she is supposed to be the older one ... did she even tell you who she was cheating on you with ... I'll tell you who Adam ... yes as in Adam the man that I was dating" Becky's face turned a little red and Randy could tell this was still a very sore subject for her.

"Well then they deserve each other" he replied sadly.

"I couldn't agree more" she nodded "so are we cool"

"There was never a time where we weren't cool" he said.

"Do you think you can talk to Ash so she doesn't jump me next time she sees me alone in the hall?" Becky asked.

"Don't sweat it you know how Ashley gets she's stubborn as hell and hates every situation she can't control".

"She's very protective over you" Becky mused.

"She's that way with everyone she cares about ... it's just how she is"

_Meanwhile with Ashley..._

Ashley had sent John and the boys to go get ice cream, while she went to go visit Stephanie. She had kept the baby with her and was in her own little world as she strolled down the halls of Madison Square Garden. She was still preparing herself for the presentation she had to give in just a few hours, she was so distracted she didn't hear the person calling her name. She jumped a little as she felt someone's hand on her shoulder. Her eyes met his and at that moment everything she happened to be thinking about went out the window.

"I didn't mean to scare you I was calling your name" Shane said "I figured you were ignoring me but I wanted to talk to you"

"I wasn't ignoring you I'm just a little freaked out about having to speak in public" she replied her voice void of emotion.

"You'll do fine"

"So ... how are the boys?" she asked not sure of what else to say.

"They are doing fine" he replied "how's Phin?"

"He's doing well you should hear him now he'll talk your ear off"

Shane scratched the back of his head "Is this as awkward for you as it is for me?"

"Yeah kinda"

"Listen I'm sorry for the way things ended" he said.

"Me too ... I know towards the end I was horrible to live with and I don't blame you for ending things but in a letter come on Shane that is completely shitty"

"Yeah I felt horrible about that but I really didn't know what else to do things were never the same after the whole custody thing" he said.

"Well I'm happy that you and Marissa were able to work things out" she said truly meaning it.

"Yeah, I feel the same way about you and John ... I always kinda knew you two belonged together"

"We aren't together" she told him.

"Oh ... I just assumed since you two adopted another baby" he said taking a glance at Faith.

"Don't take this the wrong way Shane but after what you and John put me through I'm not in a hurry to rush into any relationships right now, John and I are just two people who live in the same house that happens to also have kids living in it"

"She's cute you know" he said "what's her name?"

"Faith"

"I like it she looks like a Faith"

"Would you like to hold her?"

"Oh no I couldn't" he protested.

"Oh come on Shane" she said placing the baby in his arms.

"Wow I feel so out of practice and Kenyon is only two"

"John and I were discussing who her godparents should be and John suggested that maybe you should be her godfather that is if you would want to be" she said.

"Would that really be ok with you?" he asked.

"I think life is too short to hold grudges Shane if you are willing then I'd love to be your friend again"

"I'd like that more than anything and yes I would love to be Faith's godfather"

"Then it is settled you and Stephanie are her godparents" Ashley said smiling.

"I'm am truly honored" he said handing the baby back to her mother.

"There is one thing that I wanted to tell you for a while now" she said.

"What would that be?"

"Even though things ended on not so good terms I wouldn't change having you or the boys in my life because when we were together it was amazing, you were what I needed at the time. You showed me not every guy out there was a scumbag like I thought John was. Shane you really did teach me how to love again and I will never be able to thank you enough for that"

"There is no need to thank me because I feel the same way" he remarked "but what you could help me with is setting up some kind of play date for Dean and Declan, he misses his best friend"

Ashley laughed a little as she placed Faith back in her stroller.

"I'm sure something can be arranged"

They hugged each other and Shane said he would call her to set something up for the boys. Ashley had this nagging thought that Randy had been right but she would never tell him so because that would give him some leverage over her and she refused to let that happen.

_Later that day ..._

"I would like to thank everyone for being here today" Ashley started off "I want to talk to you about an idea that came to me about 6 months ago. Now I know most if not all of you have children and wish you could be around more while they were growing up well with my solution why shouldn't you"

She explained everything she had researched and planned for the new child care program and was very proud of everything she had accomplished by the time she was finished. She stopped speaking and waited patiently for any kind of response from her crowd. Her heart was beating so hard in her chest she thought it was going to jump out at any second. Shane was the first one to begin clapping for her, he knew how hard she had worked on this project and he for one liked the idea. Soon everyone was on their feet applauding her. She now understood why John liked being in the middle of the ring with people cheering him on it was an incredible rush. After all her months of planning and research they could finally begin the journey to the more family friendly WWE.


	29. Chapter 29

_Chapter 29: Destined Forever_

Ashley had just finished putting Faith down for her nap and took a moment to enjoy the peace and quiet of the afternoon. Then it hit her why was it so quiet. She knew somewhere there was a 2 year old who was being way too quiet for her liking. Phinnigan was a typical boy his age, he screamed and threw things and made more noise than any adult could make. But ever since they had brought Faith home Phinnigan's behavior had been all the more trying. He was jealous that he wasn't the only baby anymore and although Ashley and John did everything they could to reassure him that he was still just as important he didn't like sharing his parents with another baby. Especially his mommy, if Ashley happened to be holding Faith, Phinnigan would come over and crawl into her lap also. He hit his baby sister and tried to bite her every chance he got. He also enjoyed stealing her binkie and hiding it. Phinnigan was no longer allowed to have his binkie so he figured if he couldn't have one neither could his sister. When John was home things weren't as bad because each parent could take a child but when it was just Ashley and the kids things hit the fan. Ashley thanked the lord for Dean, he was like an angel sent from Heaven he really was he would keep Phinnigan entertained for hours so Ashley could have a break. She had become very fond of having Dean around and was sad every morning when she had to drop him off at school.

Ashley left the room and went in search of the toddler. Phinnigan was in the living room sitting on the floor. He seemed to be watching television but Ashley doubted he wasn't thinking up some way to get into trouble. As soon as she entered the room Phinnigan ran over to the couch and hid something he had been holding underneath it.

"Phinnigan give me what you just hid" Ashley commanded sternly.

"No" Phinnigan stated.

Ashley placed her hands on her hips "Phinnigan I'll give you until the count of 3 and then you'll be going for a time out because you aren't listening to mommy"

"1 ... 2" he took whatever he was hiding out from under the couch cushion and handed it to his mother. He hated being in time out, he was a very active little boy and having to sit still for any amount of time without being able to move made him extremely unhappy.

Ashley's eyes widened as she look at what was now resting in the palm of her hands.

"Phinnigan are these daddy's dog tags?" she asked him already knowing the answer.

"Yes" he replied laughing to himself.

"Phinnigan, Daddy is going to be furious with you once he realizes he doesn't have his dog tags" John had never been a superstitious man by any stretch of the imagination but he had had these dog tags made with the names of his parents and brothers on them and he kissed them before every match believing that if he did so it would help him stay safe in the match. 

Ashley closed her eyes and massaged her temples. Now she had the pleasure of calling John and explaining to him what their "angelic" little boy had taken it upon himself to do.

"Little boy you'd better start behaving real soon" she warned him. 

He sat down once again and busied himself with his little Hot Wheel race cars Ashley had bought him the other day. She grabbed her cell phone and walked out into the kitchen. She could still see Phinnigan from where she was standing.

_Meanwhile with John ..._

John found himself working out with some of the guys. Him, Randy, Hunter, Shawn, and Kennedy were all hanging out. Normally John would go to the gym by himself but every once and a great while a group of them would go.

_'Touch my body throw me to the floor wrestle me around play with me some more' _the sultry voice of Mariah Carey seemed to be coming out of John's pocket.

All the men stopped what they were doing to gaped at John. He grabbed his phone and looked at his caller id. Ashley's cell displayed on the screen.

"Ash sweetie did you change my ring tone?" he asked kinda annoyed.

"_No John I just thought it would be cute if I had my very own ring tone"_ she replied trying to hold back the urge to laugh.

"How nice of you" he replied dryly.

"_Oh come on John you know you want to do all those things she mentions in the song to me"_ she smirked.

"Not right now I don't"

"_Anyways I just called to inform you that our son took your dog tags out of your bag and I'm now holding them in my hands which means they aren't with you"_

"Great" John sighed "we really need to do something about his behavior"

"Terrible twos" Ashley said.

"Well I guess I'm going to have to wrestle without them tonight then"

"_I'll tell you what tonight just before your match starts I'll kiss them for you and let's just hope it works"_

"Yeah whatever I gotta go now"

"_Ok be safe and tell Randy I said Carrie Underwood"_

"What the hell?"

"_It's an inside joke"_

"Ok whatever"

They hung up and as soon as he put his phone back into his pocket he could hear the guys start to snicker.

"Oh yes let's all laugh now ... like your wives or girlfriends have never changed the ringer on your phone before" he rolled his eyes.

All the guys began to laugh even harder. John just sat there with his arms crossed very annoyed.

"Dude that is so gay" Kennedy practically snorted.

"By the way Randy Ash told me to say Carrie Underwood"

Randy nodded and shook his head while still laughing. Oh Ashley she could be such an ass when she wanted to be. He was going to have to keep his cell phone away from her from now on because there was no way he was going to be the guy with the flaming ring tone.

_Back to Ashley ..._

Ashley went to put John's dog tags in his dresser that way Phinnigan didn't get the chance to hide or loose them. She opened the top drawer and put the dog tags down. She noticed a velvet ring box and her being nosey as hell couldn't help but pick it up. She opened it up and was awed, tears gathered in her eyes. She took out the ring and looked at it. It seemed like a lifetime ago that she had given it to John.

_Flashback_

"_Ash I can't believe you brought me to Ireland with you" John said._

"_Hey Olivia said to bring a date to her wedding so who better than my boyfriend right" Ashley said._

"_You know our one month anniversary is in two days" John said._

"_Hmm ... then we'd better start looking for gifts then shouldn't we" she replied knowing that both John and herself waited till the last minute to do everything._

"_I guess so" he kissed her nose._

"_I'll meet you back at the house in an hour ok" she told him walking away._

_John had no idea what he was going to get her so he began going into all the little stores this small farming town had. He was hoping something would stand out to him. After 30 minutes he had still found nothing that he thought Ashley would like. He tried one more store, he was just about ready to give up when something caught his eye. He walked over to a small jewelry case to get a better look. It was a ring, the band was intertwined with thin gold and sliver pieces. Two hands were holding onto a heart with a crown on top of it. John had never seen a ring like this before._

"_Ya like the claddah do ya young man" the shop owner walked over to him. "funny you happen to be looking as this specific ring, we had a set but someone came in about 20 minutes ago and bought the masculine one"_

"_The claddah?" John asked confused._

"_Don't tell me you don't know the meaning of a claddah ring" the man said "well the way that a __Claddagh ring is worn on the hand is usually intended to convey the wearer's romantic availability, or lack thereof. Traditionally, if the ring is on the right hand with the design facing outward and away from the body, this indicates that the person wearing the ring is not in any serious __relationship__, and may in fact be single and looking for a relationship. When worn on the right hand but with the design facing inward toward the body, this indicates the person wearing the ring is in a relationship, or that "someone has captured their heart". A Claddagh worn on the left hand ring finger, facing outward away from the body, generally indicates that the wearer is __engaged__. When the ring is on the left hand ring finger and facing inward toward the body, it generally means that the person wearing the ring is __married__."_

"_Would you suggest it for a first anniversary present?" he asked._

"_Do you really care for the girl?" the store owner asked a question of his own._

"_Yes ...Why?"_

"_Because some people also say when worn on the left hand, facing in, in the usual married way as meaning, the wearer is destined to be with his or her love forever. We Irish folks believe in only selling Claddaghs if the buyers are sure their love is forever call us old fashioned that way" _

"_I'll take it" John told the man knowing that Ashley would love it._

_The man nodded and rand him up. John was very excited to show Ashley what he had picked out. He wondered if she knew what a claddah ring meant. She probably did seeing as how her mother was Irish and probably explained things like that to her a long time ago. They met up at the house once again._

"_I can't wait 3 days so do you want to exchange gifts now?" Ashley asked seeming equally as excited as John was._

"_Sure" he replied._

_They both exchanged the bags containing their gifts and both removed small black velvet ring boxes. Much to the surprise of the other they had purchased the same gift._

"_Wow great minds really do think alike huh" John said placing the ring on Ashley's left hand._

"_John you realize that you put it on so it looks like we are engaged right" she pointed out._

"_Yes I did that for a reason I don't want any other guy to try and steal you away" he grinned. She placed the ring the same way on his left ring finger._

"_Destined to be in love forever" he said kissing her._

She placed the ring back into the box and put it back into John's dresser. Smiling she left the room and went to go find her ring.


	30. Chapter 30

Ride of Your Life

**Ride of Your Life**

Chapter Thirty: They Became One

A smile was on Ashley's face as she walked into John's house. John picked up on her good mood instantly and raised an eyebrow as he fed Faith.

"What's got you smiling?"

"Nothin'." Was her simple reply, yet John didn't buy it. Ashley threw the house key on the coffee table. "I'm looking for a new place." She told John.

"I hope it's close to here. I'd like to see my kids a lot."

"I know." Ashley smiled at him before giggling like mad.

John placed the empty bottle down on the coffee table before going to burp the infant.

"Phin still with Randy?" she asked.

"Yeah, I think Randy should be here with him soon."

"That's good." Ashley sat down on the couch next to John. "How's mommy's baby girl?"

"She's doing fabulous, she's been sleeping a lot, and Ash. I actually changed her diaper."

Ashley looked at John strangely. "Did you just use the word… fabulous?". She knew that was a blatant reference John was making towards his father the one and only "Johnny Fabulous".

John blinked. "Yes, I did…got a problem with that?" he asked playfully.

Ashley didn't say anything, just stared at the wall before her and sighed.

"Who's the guy?"

Ashley looked to John quickly. "There is no guy."

"Yes there is. Name?"

The woman sighed. "Bob."

"…Bob?"

"Yes, Bob."

"Is he sexier than me?" Faith burped and John rubbed her back lightly. "Good girl." He told her.

"You'll have to see for yourself tonight. He's picking me up to go out to dinner." Ashley told him.

"Dinner? What the hell, Ash. You just met him."

"John, it'll be okay. It's time for me to start dating again. I think I'm ready. I think my heart is ready." Ashley took the now sleeping baby out of John's arms and went to put her down to sleep.

"But my heart isn't." John mumbled as he watched Ashley leave the room.

--

Randy arrived with Dean and Phinnigan less than ten minutes later. John was pacing as Randy walked in.

"Hey, man. What's up?" Randy questioned as he leaned down to help Phinnigan take off his coat.

"The worst thing happened."

"What happened Uncle John?" Dean asked as he threw his jacket on the couch.

John looked at Dean. "Nothing you should worry about." John smiled and ruffled Dean's hair. "Did you both have fun today?"

"Daddy, rowar."

"Roar?"

"Yesh!" Phinnigan yelled as he threw his hands in the air.

Randy laughed as Dean and Phinnigan ran out of the room to go to their room.

Randy looked to John, "so, what's up? Did Ash come back?"

"Yes, with a date!"

"She brought a guy here?"

John shook his head no. "He's coming tonight to pick her up for dinner! His name is Bob."

Randy laughed. "Bob?"

"Yes. She's not ready to date."

"You're not ready for her to date." Randy corrected. "Besides, how can a guy named Bob be better than you? She loves you."

John mumbled. "As a friend."

"You're the father of her kids."

"We're not together, though. Not like I'd want to be and besides, she deserves to be happy."

"Yeah." Randy agreed. "She does. Well, I can tell you once the guy comes here tonight, we are going to grill his ass like a sausage."

"Like a sausage?" John raised an eyebrow. "More like a hamburger! Or…or… hell - baby back ribs!"

"Baby back ribs is taking it a little too far John." Randy remarked as he sat down on the couch.

--

"John, Randy, this is Bob." Ashley greeted. "Bob, this is Randy and John."

"Hey, I'm Bob Younger." Bob had pale skin, and green eyes. He seemed to be in good shape and could give John a running for his money in the looks department.

"Mommy!" Ashley heard Phinnigan call. She smiled at Bob. "I'll be right back, I have to check on my son." She told him before heading to Phinnigan's room.

Once she left John and Randy's fake smiles faded and was replaced by intense glaring.

"I hope you know I'm Ashley's baby daddy."

"I know." He replied coolly. "I'm a huge fan."

"Oh you are, are you?"

"I just said so…yeah."

"So, you're only using Ash to get to John?"

"I'm straight sorry." He let them know.

"Ha, likely story!" John said putting a hand on the intruder's shoulder forcefully. "If you hurt Ashley, we'll break your face."

"You know you can go to jail for assault. No reason to be jealous, John. Though, I understand…look at me. And tonight I plan to have her screaming my name while we enjoy hot wings and wild sex." Bob laughed as Ashley came into the room. She smiled at the men and John took his hand off Bob's shoulder, glaring at the man intensely.

"Uhh...we're going to go now." Ashley replied.

John hugged Ashley, surprising her.

"Have fun, and if he hurts you I'll kill him." He whispered in Ashley's ear.

Ashley smiled and whispered back. "Remember John, at the end of the day, you're the one I'm coming home to."

Bob cleared his throat and Ashley and John pulled away.

"Ready?" Bob asked Ashley, putting his arm around her waist.

"Yeah." As Bob opened the door for Ashley, Bob looked at John and smirked.

John's teeth grated together in annoyance.

--

**She sighed, distressed as she laid on her back in her canopy bed. She didn't know how she could be so dumb, and got herself into this situation. Her parents were not going to be happy. The timer on her nightstand rung loudly in her ears, making her jump slightly.**

**Lying on her stomach was a piece of plastic that would defy her fate. She picked it up slowly and shut her eyes. Once she had it above her eyes, she opened them. She groaned. **

"**I'm such a dumbass." She muttered before turning it to the correct side. The digital test gave her the result. **

"**Pregnant." She spoke before taking a deep breath and having a tear roll down her cheek. She threw the test; it didn't go very far, though. She threw like a girl.**

'**I guess I should tell him…' her thoughts trailed. The fire that was usually in her eyes was dead at the moment. She picked up her cell phone and dialed his number.**

"**Hello?" he answered.**

**She was silent.**

"**Hello? I hope you're not trying to prank me. You know I have caller ID, Becky."**

"**I'm pregnant." She blurted out.**

**The phone line went dead on her end. He didn't hang up, she did. At that moment she regretted telling him.**

**Her phone rang again, he was calling. Becky pressed the ignore button, she couldn't talk to him after that call. She shut off her phone before snuggling up to her pillow and putting the covers over her head. She hoped tomorrow would be a better day.**

**--**

"I love this place." Bob told Ashley as he pulled out her chair for her to sit.

"Thanks." She told him.

One he was seated, he began to look through the menu.

"This is a nice place." She observed. "Do you come here often?"

He had taken her to a very casual restaurant.

He looked up. "Uhh…no."

"You say that pretty hesitantly." She noted.

"Sorry, just being with you makes me nervous."

Ashley laughed. "I bet you say that to all the girls."

"No, just you."

Ashley giggled and the waitress walked over to their table.

"Hello, I'm Sierra, I'll be your waitress. May I get you a round of drinks while you're deciding what you want?" She asked shyly.

"Sure, I'll take a corona."

"And you," Sierra looked to Ashley. "I'll take a diet Pepsi."

Sierra smiled. "I'll be right back with your drinks."

"Thank you." Ashley said politely, as she turned her head to Bob.

"No alcohol?"

Ashley looked down, she didn't feel the need to tell him about her alcoholic past. "I'm not a drinker."

He looked surprised. "Really?"

She nodded yeah. "Can you excuse me, please? I have to use the bathroom."

"Alright."

"If the waitress comes back can you tell her I want the grilled chicken meal?"

Bob nodded and Ashley smiled. "Anything for you."

Ashley giggled as she stood and walked into the direction of the rest room

Bob rolled his eyes. If she wasn't drinking, this would be harder than he expected.

Once the waitress came back, she rested the glasses in the correct spot.

"Ready to order?"

He nodded and ordered the food. Once the waitress went away. He looked around and then pulled out something from his pocket. He leaned over the table slightly and poured the small little baggie into Ashley's drink.

Across the room, a guy watched, angrily. But before he could do anything Ashley sat back down in her seat, oblivious to what occurred seconds ago.

"Drink up." Bob raised his Corona bottle and Ashley raised her diet Pepsi glass.

"To us."

"To us." Ashley repeated and was about to take a sip.

The guy stood up fast and ran to try to get to the table, but before he could he was beat by another man.

"Robert!" the man exclaimed.

Ashley smiled, confused as to who the guy was and put down her drink before the poison could grace her lips.

"…Terry." Bob mumbled.

"I must say." He looked to Ashley. "Your wife looks very different than what I had seen two weeks ago at the reunion."

"Wife?" Ashley gasped.

"I can…explain."

"Uh…oh, sorry…" Terry replied before quickly scurrying away.

The man walked to the table just as Ashley stood up and threw her drink in the married man's face.

"Drop dead!" Ashley grabbed her jacket and turned to the man in the hoodie. "…John?"

"Let me take you home." John grabbed Ashley's arm before glaring at Bob.

"Stay away from her! If I ever see you in the street I will kill you."

--

Ashley got into the car and John followed suit. "Ash, I'm sorry."

"You were stalking me."

"I'm sorry, I just wanted to make sure you were protected."

Ashley didn't say anything. What could she say? She felt like a fool. Tears escaped Ashley's eyes as she folded her arms and leaned back into the seat.

John looked at Ashley. He leaned over her to put her seat belt on. Once it was on, he glanced at Ashley and wiped her tears. He then kissed her forehead.

"Let's get you home." John put on his own seat belt before driving the car to his home.

--

John and Ashley walked into their house to see Randy lying on the couch with Dean. A blanket draped over them both as they snored away.

Ashley smiled at the sight, she sniffled. "I'm going to go check on Phin and Faith."

"Alright." John spoke before they walked upstairs to the rooms. John went into his room, and Ashley into Phinnigan's. As soon as Ashley walked into Phinnigan's room, she walked quickly back out and ran to John's room. John was just taking off his shirt.

"John! Phin's not in his room." She told him, worried.

"What?" John replied, throwing his shirt on the bed. "he was before I left."

John and Ashley both exited John's room to begin looking for their son. The first place they checked was the bathroom and the second placed they checked, was where they found him.

"Oh John…look." Ashley gushed, smiling sweetly. She stood over Faith's crib to see Phinnigan and Faith sleeping together. Phinnigan's arm was over his sister protectively.

John smiled. "Looks like the sibling jealousy is over."

"Yeah." Ashley looked to John. "You're a great a father."

"And you're an even better mother."

"I wouldn't be able to do this without you."

"That's not true, you can do anything."

"No, I can't. I can't stop being the other woman."

"You're not."

"You and Kelly, and now this. When am I going to find what I'm looking for?"

"It could be closer than you think."

"I want to be happy. It may sound stupid to you, but I always wanted kids, boy and a girl, which I have. I want the happy ever after…the white picket fence. The husband. Maybe I'm just not going to get that."

"You will."

"Will I really? We both know my history with guys. And I'm so stupid."

"You're not stupid."

"I let one of the best things to happen to me go. I coulda fought, but I didn't."

John nodded. "I'm sorry about Shane."

Ashley leaned down and kissed Phinnigan's forehead and then Faith's. She turned and walked out the room.

--

_John was laying in the bed under the covers with the lights out trying to sleep, but he couldn't._

_John heard his bed room door open so he faked sleep. He knew it was Ashley._

_Ashley was in her PJs as she got into the bed with John._

"_I didn't mean Shane." She said quietly, she was referring to the conversation she and John had in Faith's room. _

_John wanted to ask her who did she mean, but he didn't want her to know he was listening._

"_I meant you." Ashley got under the covers and snuggled onto the spare pillow. "I let you get away so many times, John. I coulda fought both times, but I didn't. I still love you, as more than a friend." She whispered._

_John turned around in the bed to face Ashley. "Ash…"_

_Ashley's mouth dropped open slightly. "I didn't…know you were up. I'll leave." Before Ashley could make any movement John put his arm around her waist and pulled her closer to him. _

"_I don't want you to leave. Ever." He told her._

_Ashley smiled. _

"_I want to be that guy."_

"_Which guy?"_

"_The one you're with. You know, the really sexy Prince Charming." John laughed. "The guy you see yourself riding off in the sunset with. The one with the kids, white picket fence and all."_

_Ashley smiled. "Good, because I want you to be that guy too. You are that guy, the one I want."_

"_You have me." John leaned forward and placed his lips on Ashley's. They kissed passionately, which turned into something more. That night, they became one._

John woke up in a sweat. He groaned as he looked over and realized that Ashley wasn't with him. It had all been a dream ... he cursed himself for being so foolish. He vowed from that point forward he would get Ashley back if it took him the rest of his life he would not give up.

A/N: I wanna give a really big shout out to Tiffany who wrote this chap. Great job it's amazing. But then again you already know you are an amazing writer. Sorry, I had to change the ending cause I'm just not ready for that just yet lol. More to come soon hopefully maybe either tomorrow or Wednesday if I feel like writing. Peace out homies luv ya all.


	31. Chapter 31

Chapter 31: Little Wonders

Becky bobbed her head slightly as she walked. Her Ipod on full blast Loose Yourself by Eminem blared into her ears. Clad in a pair of baggy navy blue Nike warm up pants and a white Nike hoodie she made her way towards her hotel room. Her medium length chestnut tresses were thrown up into a soaken wet bun. She had been swimming in the hotel pool. But as people started to crowd the pool she felt the paranoid delusion that everyone was looking at her like the knew her secret. But in reality only one other person knew, which was of course her baby's father. She turned the corner towards her hotel room and stopped short to see her baby's father leaning against her door. He looked like he hadn't gotten much sleep in a few days.

"Becky … I" but Becky didn't want to hear it.

"Please just leave" she replied.

She stepped past him but he lightly grabbed her arm and forced her to look at him. His sapphire eyes were obviously conflicted. The 26 year old man had never before been through something like this before and it was freaking him out.

"You can't just call me up and tell me you are pregnant and expect me not to care about that" he stated.

"I can do whatever the hell I want Connor the last time I checked the baby was in my body so therefore it's my decision"

"That baby was created by the both of us and I want to have some say in what happens to him or her" Becky had never really taken notice to how much Connor took after his father. Unlike his brother and sister, who took after their mother Connor Benoit was all his father's son in the looks department.

"Well this has to be a first" Becky rolled her eyes "the father actually wants to help out"

"What is that supposed to mean … I'll have you know I love children and if you had even bothered to ask I'm actually really excited to have one of my own"

"Connor you don't have to do this" Becky sighed.

"I know I don't have to but Becky I'm not the kind of guy that just walks away from something like this I wasn't raised like that and neither was Ashley or Keegan"

"Your sister is gonna kill me" Becky grimaced.

"Yeah she probably will" Connor nodded his head in playful agreement.

Becky smacked him playfully in his arm. She let herself smile a little, somehow deep inside she knew that things were going to be ok.

--

"You know Faith I think your mommy underestimates daddy" John said to 2 month old Faith as they enjoyed some quiet daddy/daughter time.

Faith gurgled a little as she stuck her little fist into her mouth. She lifted her head a little so she could look at her dad. She was lying on her stomach on John's chest. She gave him her little goofy toothless grin that made his heart melt every time. Much like her older brother Faith was a very happy baby, always laughing and smiling. It amazed John even now how much her personality had developed like such little time. The full head of dark hair she had been born with was now almost gone and in it's place dirty blonde curls seemed to be appearing. Ashley had gone crazy going baby clothes shopping for this little girl it was ridiculous . She owned so many dresses and skirts and jeans and little pink tops. Ashley had even special ordered a pair of baby pink Ugg boots for Faith. She always had to be dressed up like a little lady when Ashley was around. But right now Daddy's little girl wore only a pink onesie and matching little pink socks.

Faith yawned and rubbed her eyes with her little hands. She certainly had John wrapped around her little finger. When he was home he was always the first one to pick little Faith up when she cried. Having her made him realize that he liked being a father to a little girl. He now knew what Ashley's dad meant when he said there is nothing like rocking your little girl in your arms. He loved to kiss her chubby little cheeks or blow raspberries on her belly and listen to the sound of her laughter. She finally closed her eyes and John contented himself to rubbing her back.

Not long after that he could hear the soft snores coming from his baby daughter. Her mouth was ajar a little bit and there was a hint of drool on the corner of her mouth. She somehow moved her thumb into her mouth as she slept.

He couldn't believe that he could ever not want this beautiful little girl with him. He was glad that Ashley had forced his hand on adopting Faith. Now he had his little boy and his baby girl things were almost perfect. Now all he needed was the wife to go along with the two kids, white picket fence, and the mini van.

"Were home" Ashley called entering the house with Phinnigan asleep on her shoulder.

"In the parlor" John quietly called back.

Ashley went to place Phinnigan in his bed before going to find John. She met him in the hallway leading from her room where he had put Faith in her crib.

"Wow this is what silence sounds like" Ashley said then she thought about it for a minute "I prefer the noise"

"So anything interesting happen to you and the boy today while you were out?" he asked.

"Yeah I found the perfect house and I signed the deed this afternoon"

John's face fell a little but that went unnoticed by Ashley who was still in her own little world.

"What's with the rush?" he asked.

"I hardly consider it rushed I've been living here for almost 3 months now and besides with Randy and Dean living here also it's getting kinda quiet" she replied.

"When do you move?" he asked sadly.

"In a week" she answered rubbing her hands together in excitement.

"Oh … I just thought there would be a little more time"

"Believe me John you will be glad when me and the kids are gone you can go back to your bachelor lifestyle … wow I should probably start packing now" she walked away from him and into her room.

John was now more determined than ever to make it so he and Ashley were going to reconcile but would he have enough time. All he could really do was hope.


	32. Chapter 32

Chapter 32: Breathless

"So were going to tell Ashley today and once her blood pressure returns to normal we can tell my dad because lord knows Ashley is going to flip out more than he will" Connor told Becky as they drove to the John's home.

"Why does your sister care so much I meant you are an adult?"

"Ashley has been like a mother to me and Keegan since our mom died … we've been through a lot of shit that you couldn't even imagine" he remarked not wanting to go into details.

"Damn I wish my own sister cared half as much as yours does"

"Believe me sometimes it gets annoying but Ashley is just trying to keep the people she loves safe, believe me she has always been like that and more than likely always will"

"How do you think she'll take the news?" Becky asked.

"She can't really comment because the last time I checked she isn't married either," he said pulling into the driveway.

"Besides her kid's dad is John, now don't get me wrong I love the man like a brother but would you really want him raising your kids … I don't know about you but I wouldn't. The man is still a kid himself"

"Well here goes nothing" Becky said getting out of the car.

They walked up the driveway together and knocked on the door. They could hear little feet running to the door and then it opened to reveal Dean and Phinnigan.

"Unca" Phinnigan hugged his uncle's leg.

"Hey there Munchkin" he picked Phinnigan up and threw him over his shoulder.

"Hey Dean-O you seen Munchkin?" Connor asked the 5 year old.

"He's on your shoulder Connor" Dean laughed.

"So he is," Phinnigan giggled as Connor put him down.

"Mommy Unca … Mommy Unca" he yelled running away.

Ashley came from the back of the house. She was smiling which Connor was glad for maybe she wouldn't freak out as bad as he thought she would.

"What's up little brother" she hugged him tightly "what brings Detective Benoit by?"

"What can't I come visit my big sister without having an ulterior motive" he grinned.

"You are forgetting I know you better than you know yourself bro so I know something is going on" she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Spill" she ordered tapping her foot against the hardwood floor.

"Hey Ash" Becky announced her presence.

"Oh hey Becky I didn't even see you there" Ashley greeted the young girl.

She cocked an eyebrow "Both of you are here … should I be worried?"

"No, not at all big sister in fact you should be the opposite"

"Ok now I have officially moved from worried to terrified" Ashley said.

"Well sis you are going to be an auntie" Connor wrapped an arm around Becky's waist.

Ashley normally serene face turned immediately red. She took in a few deep breaths before opening her mouth to speak.

"CONNOR JOSHUA BENOIT ARE YOU FREAKIN' CRAZY," she yelled.

Dean and Phinnigan peaked out from the living room to see what Ashley was yelling about. Both seemed to take solace that they weren't the ones getting yelled at.

"OoOoOo Connor is in trouble" Dean whispered to his partner in crime.

"Uh huh" Phinnigan agreed.

Both boys went back to what they were doing. Ashley was pacing by now muttering things to herself and every once in a while glancing up at the two young people before her.

"Connor you are only 24 years old" she finally said.

"You were the same age I am now when you adopted Phin," he pointed out "I have my own place and I have a stable job with good benefits"

"Well are you two at least dating?" she asked.

"Well no …"

"Oh great so basically what happened is you two very stupid kids probably got drunk and had unprotected sex and now you are going to have a baby" she began to pace faster "well dad is gonna have a field day with this one … I thought you both were smarter than this"

"Well nothing is going to change what has already been done" Connor stated "try being happy for us"

"Do either of you realize how incredibly hard it is having a baby … especially you Becky you are barely 20"

"We can handle it" Connor said confidently.

"Oh so you think … you know what you two get to baby-sit tonight," Ashley said.

"I don't remember volunteering" Connor protested.

"You two want my blessing then you are going to earn it, Randy is going out tonight and I'm going to get John to help me move some stuff into my new apartment so you two get to take care of all 3 kids tonight and if you manage to survive the night then you can have my blessing"

"I've babysat Phin before Ash it's not that hard"

"Oh Connor my sweet boy you have no idea what you are in for" she began laughing at him.

"No idea" she continued laughing as she went to go find John.

--

"John will you hurry your slow ass up" Ashley was waiting for him at the foot of the stairs.

She had a very heavy box in her arms and John has the keys to the apartment. She sighed a little and waited.

"I'm here" he huffed climbing the last few steps "you know you could have put the box down"

"Yeah and you could not be a jackass" she replied.

"But then I have no fun" he stuck his tongue out at her.

"Unless you plan on using that put it back into your mouth" she said.

"Oh I'll use it baby just let me know when"

"Eww John you are so gross" she slapped him in the arm.

"Can you grab the keys out of my pocket because my arms are starting to get tired?" he asked.

She smirked as she grabbed the keys out of his pocket. She opened the door and they both went in.

"Just put those things in the corner," she told him.

She pulled out her cell phone and dialed John's home phone. After talking to Connor for about 10 minutes she shut her phone. There was a huge grin on her face.

"The kids are starting to get to them I can tell plus I bribed the boys with ice cream sundaes and told them to be on their worst behavior"

"Now why would you do that?" John asked shaking his head.

"Because they need to learn that kids are always around, the good, the bad, and the really ugly. They need to see that once this kid is born they can't just wish it away because it's crying or throwing a tantrum"

Rain pelted the windows hard. Both adults look toward the windows and grimaced.

"There is only one more box I'll grab it and then we'll just wait here till this storm dies down" John told her.

"Ok … I might as well light a fire in the fireplace because you are gonna be freezing when you come back"

John left and returned 5 minutes later completely sopping met from head to toe. He took off his shoes and left them by the door. Placing the soggy box in the small kitchen he went to go sit near the fireplace. Ashley had set out a blanket for them to sit on instead of the hard floor.

"Here give me your shirt" she held her hand out.

He peeled off his shirt and handed it to her. She carefully hung it above the fireplace to dry.

A loud crack of lightning and an even louder boom of thunder crashed right outside the window. Ashley jumped a little bit as the lights went out, she had a phobia of thunder and lighting that went back to her experience from the home she had been put into. She had a seat near John. He could see that she was shivering. He got up and sat behind her so she could lean up against him, which she did gratefully. He ran his hands up and down her arms in a comforting manner.

"It's ok I'm right here to protect you" she had told him of her fear of thunder storms right after they had began dating but it was only recently had she explained where the fear came from.

She stopped shivering and enjoyed the feeling of John's arms around her.

"You ok now?" he asked.

"I am knowing you are here," she said.

"I'm always going to be here for you Ash you know that"

"I know but what about you I mean when do you get to be happy?" she asked.

"What makes you think I'm not happy?" he retorted.

"This isn't how I pictured life you know" she said.

"Well how did you picture it" he laced her fingers with his.

"I don't know I just pictured it differently"

"Well I like the way my life turned out, I have a great career and two beautiful kids"

"But doesn't it bother you that you are single?" she asked.

"A little … I'm getting older and I think it would be nice if someone made an honest man out of me"

"You aren't that old John" she rolled her eyes.

"Let me ask you a question are you sad that things didn't work out with you and Shane?" he asked.

"Yes and no, I'm glad that him and Marissa were able to work things out but what I had with Shane was special and I would have like to have found out what would have happened if we had stayed together"

"I hated that you were with Shane" he felt no need to lie to her.

"Why?"

"I'm not going to pretend that I was ok with him raising my son because I wasn't and the fact that you were with him and not me made me mad too. I told you once that I will always love you and I meant it"

"Then if you love me why Kelly?"

"You broke my heart when you ended things and lets face it I'm a guy and guys can't go long without sex"

"So how long has it been since you last had sex?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

"7 months ago" he replied.

"Damn "Ashley found herself saying.

"Yeah … but I was only with Kelly for the sex I always knew that I was in love with you and that she could never compare. When she told me she was pregnant I was only doing what I thought I was supposed to not what I wanted to do"

"The truth is I don't want you to move out … I don't want to just be your friend I want to be the one who picks you up when you fall, I want to be the one you come home to at the end of the day for the rest of our lives, I want to be the one you want to have the huge family you always wanted with, I want to be the one you want all your dreams to come true with"

She was taken aback by his sudden confession. She wanted to tell him that she felt the same way but she was afraid something would come in the way like it always did.

"If you tell me you don't want all those things then just tell me and I will never bring it up again"

"Right now all I want is to be in your arms," she said before kissing him with all the passion she had been holding back. He laid her down and managed to get her shirt off while still kissing her.

"Wait something isn't right" he said breaking away from her "gimme your phone"

Ashley gave him a look before handing her phone over to him. He played around with it for a few seconds before setting it down. Breathless by Better Than Ezra could be heard coming out of the phone. Ashley's phone was also an MP3 player.

She rolled her eyes at him "you are such a corn ball"

"A corn ball that loves you"

As the thunder and lighting raged outside Ashley didn't seem to be afraid anymore because she knew as long as John was around she would always be safe. They didn't make it home that night. They spent the night on the living room floor of Ashley's new apartment in each other's arms and for that moment everything was perfect.


	33. Chapter 33

Chapter 33: I Wanna Go Home, Let Me Go Home

John fidgeted at the breakfast table. He kept glancing from his scrambled eggs over to Ashley, who was sitting a few seats down. His eyes would linger on her for a few seconds before quickly returning to his plate. Randy watched this whole little scene with curious annoyance. Every time John looked up Randy would see it out of the corner of his left eye.

"So you excited about being able to sleep in your bed in your new apartment tonight?" Randy asked Ashley.

She didn't reply, she just kept looking at the same newspaper article she had been looking at for the past 10 minutes.

"Hello … earth to Ashley!"

"Sorry Rans what was your question" she turned her attention to her best friend.

"I asked if you were excited about sleeping in your new apartment tonight" he remarked.

"Meh I really don't care it's not the first time I moved and it probably won't be the last"

John had a sip of his coffee and Ashley caught his eyes. Ashley blushed a little before returning her attention to the paper. John pushed his food around his plate with his fork.

"Ok what the hell is wrong with you two?" Randy asked not being able to stand the weirdness any longer.

"Nothing …" they both answered at the same time.

Randy eyed both his best friends suspiciously he knew something had gone down but he wasn't sure what. He knew he'd have to grill Ashley about it later. He knew it would be a hell of a lot easier to get it out of her than it would be John. That man really knew how to keep a secret if he wanted to. This really pissed Randy off because he was a nosey mother fucker.

"Hey Ash how was sleeping with John the other night?" Randy asked.

"It was nice" she replied not paying attention.

John sat there with his mouth open he was going to have some of his eggs but stopped midway to his mouth in surprise. Ashley practically threw the news paper in shock. She looked at Randy in amazement.

"… how could you possibly know that?" she asked still reeling.

"I know you two better than you two know yourselves" he leaned back a little bit in his chair placing his palms flat against the back of his head "so the only thing that would have you two acting this weird is if you two slept together and since you two never managed to come home the night of that storm I just now put two and two together"

Neither adult had anything to say. Dean walked into the room with his little backpack slung over his little shoulders.

"Daddy why does Uncle John look so funny?" he asked. John still had his mouth open in shock.

"Dean, what have I told you about asking offensive questions … Uncle John can't help he was born looking like that" Randy pretended to scold his son. Ashley could be heard snickering from underneath her news paper which she had just picked back up.

"You guys are A holes" John retorted.

"Daddy, what's an A hole?" Dean asked.

"Nothing you need to worry about" Randy said "now come on before you are late for school" 

he scooped the little boy up and threw him over his shoulder and ran with him like that out to his car.

"You know I'm really glad Randy proved me wrong" Ashley mused out loud.

"Maybe you are wrong a lot more than you think" he mumbled to himself.

She glanced at him taking into consideration everything he told her the other night. She wanted to stay, she really did but she was afraid they had tried to make it work in the past but things always seemed to get in their way. But this time if something like that happened again it wasn't just themselves they had to think about, there were two young children who needed both of their parents. It wouldn't be fair to them if their parents weren't able to be civil enough to at least think about their wellbeing. He knew why she was pushing him away but that didn't mean he agreed with it

"So are we gonna talk?" he asked.

"There really isn't anything to discuss John" she said rising to rid herself of her dirty breakfast dish "you told me how you feel and I told you how I feel and that should have been the end of it right there"

"You are a stubborn ass who doesn't realize how good she has it" he remarked.

"Go to hell John" she retorted.

A loud wail could be heard coming from the living room. Both adults forgot their persona feud for the time being. They raced to the living room, Phinnigan was lying on the ground writhing in pain.

"Phin baby what happened" Ashley kneeled down next to the fallen toddler.

"Arm … arm hurt" he wailed.

John picked the small boy up and he clung to his father still crying hysterically. His left arm was already starting to swell.

"He definitely broke it" John said. By this time in his life he had become an expert on things such as broken bones.

"Give me him … I'll take him to the hospital and you stay here with Faith" she told him.

"No, I want to go with you" he stated.

"Fine just go get the baby ready then" she relented rather than causing another argument.

"It's ok baby" she rocked Phinnigan a little in her arms. He whimpered into her shirt because that was all he could really do. He was too young to realize that falling from the arm of the couch and landing on it had broken his arm. All he knew was his arm really hurt him.

John returned with baby Faith a few minutes later. He didn't bother putting socks or shoes on her, to save time he had just put her in her carrier and was on his way.

They walked out of the house and Ashley got into the back seat of the car. She was still holding onto Phinnigan who refused to let go of her.

John flipped through a magazine while they waited for one of the ER doctors to come over and look at Phinnigan's arm. Although it had been extremely difficult they had gotten him to take an x-ray. Ashley still had Phinnigan in her arms, she was currently running her fingers through his hair and whispering words of comfort to him. Finally after what felt like hours but in reality was only about 20 minutes someone came over to talk to them.

"Looks like your son fractured his arm in two places" the tall male nurse told them.

Ashley looked the man over. He wasn't bad looking, he had short dark brown hair and brown eyes. He was wearing hospital scrubs but Ashley could tell from his well toned arms he more 

than likely worked out. She read his name badge to find out that his name was Fran. She had to stop herself from letting out a laugh. She was sure the man's name was Francis of course but it was still very amusing to her that people called him Fran. John caught her staring at the man and his blood boiled. How dare she have the nerve to check out another man while he was sitting right there in the room … while their son was suffering from a broken arm no less.

"We'll put a cast on him and the hospital's case worker will need to talk to you" Fran said.

'Why?" Ashley asked.

"It's policy with children, they want to make sure there was no abuse" he replied.

"Makes sense I guess"

"I'll go grab the stuff for his cast" Fran excused himself.

"Keep your legs closed now Ash I mean it is a hospital and all" John remarked rather nastily.

"You are a pig" she spat at him.

"It's not my fault you were eye fucking the male nurse" he defended his statement.

"I was not eye fucking him" she furiously whispered "besides what I do is my own business and I don't see why it bothers you"

John wanted to explode "You know perfectly well why it bothers me" his teeth were clenched.

"I'm not having this argument with you again"

"I don't know why I even bother" he rolled his eyes in disgust.

"Well that makes two of us hun"

Fran came back and plastered Phinnigan's arm all up. He then let Phin pick out the color he wanted his cast to be. The toddler debated for a few minutes before pointing his tiny finger to the dark blue colored wrapping.

"Good choice buddy" Fran smiled before putting the finishing touches on his cast. John nearly saw red when the man used his nickname for Phinnigan. He clenched and unclenched his fists in an annoyed manner.

Phinnigan was too interested in what Fran was doing to really pay attention to the pain in his arm anymore. His green eyes watched in wonder as Fran began to wrap his arm. By the time he was all finished Phinnigan was all smiles. Fran left and the case worker came in to talk to them. After explaining to the woman in her mid 50's that Phinnigan had simply fallen off of their couch and being lightly reprimanded for not keeping a better eye on their son they were allowed to take him home.

Phinnigan ran into his home and looked around for his Uncle Randy. He found him just coming out of the shower. He was towel clad and feeling refreshed.

"Ranny!" Phinnigan exclaimed running towards the third generation superstar.

"Hey buddy what happened to your arm?" Randy asked leaning down to inspect the cast.

"Boo boo … me arm" the small boy replied.

"Aww poor little guy" Randy patted the top of his head before standing back up.

An idea crossed Phinnigan's mind. A huge grin plastered over his face as he brought his broken arm back as far as it could go. He swung his arm as hard as he could and connected with Randy's shin. Randy jumped backwards a little which caused him to drop his towel. Phinnigan laughed satisfied with his mischief.

"Phinnigan what are you … WOW FULL FRONTAL RANDAL" Ashley turned the corner and covered her eyes quickly.

The mortified superstar snatched his towel from the floor and hastily wrapped it around his waist. He stood there crimson faced and annoyed.

"Damn Randy is it cold in here?" Ashley asked chuckling.

"Screw you" he grumbled "your delinquent son just assaulted me with his cast"

"Phinnigan William Joshua tell Randy you are sorry" Ashley ordered the toddler.

"Sorry Ranny" Phinnigan did as he was told.

"Yeah sure you are" Randy said sarcastically.

"Go play now and if I hear you hit anyone else with that cast you will be in time out till you grow facial hair understand"

Phinnigan ran off to play with his toys. Ashley leaned against the wall with her hands crossed over her chest.

"I think he senses that me and John aren't getting along too well right now" Ashley said.

"Can't say I blame the little guy" Randy replied.

"John wants me to stay here but I can't it's too hard living here"

"Yeah but are you really leaving for the right reasons because you are taking your kids from a home that they have become used to"

"You make it sound like they are never going to be here every again they still get to spend time here when you and John are home"

"Did you take into consideration how this is going to affect John once you leave?" Randy asked.

"It's not like he is going to be alone … you and Dean are still here" Ashley weakly reasoned.

"You know perfectly well that is not what I meant, it doesn't take a genius to figure out that John is head over heels for you"

"Rans, me and John just don't work"

It was later that evening and Ashley had just gotten the last few things she was taking into her 2010 Dodge Durango. The kids were all strapped into their car seats and she had just shut the back door to the truck. It was raining hard and even though she wore a sweatshirt with a hood she was still soaken wet. John stood by the front door of his home watching the mother of his children.

"So this is how is gonna be then" his voice carried over the sound of the rain.

"Please don't start" she pleaded with him.

"I don't want you to go" he tired one more time to reason with her.

"John no matter how much you want it to work you know in your heart that we just don't work together"

"Fine then just walk away and pretend like what we had didn't matter"

"I'm sorry I have to go" she said getting into her already running truck.

She began to drive away. Phinnigan waved at his father from the backseat. John put on a smile for his son and waved back. He was grateful for the rain now because that way no one would notice his tears. With a broken heart he entered his home and felt a loneliness that he hadn't felt in some time.


	34. Chapter 34

Chapter 34: Brilliant Disguise

One Month Later …

Everything was a blur to her. The lights flashed as she ran as fast as she could down a long corridor, the smell of disinfectant burned her nose. She didn't stop running until she saw a familiar face.

"Dan" she practically gasped. She took a moment to compose herself before hugging her children's uncle.

"He's going to be ok"

Tears stung her eyes, everything seemed so scary at the moment she had no idea what to do. The man had been like a second father to her for some time now and if anything happened to him, she like the rest of the Cena family would be totally lost. She let go of Dan and stood there awkwardly not knowing what to say.

"How has everyone been holding up?" she finally managed to ask.

"Ok I guess I mean it's only been a few hours" Dan scratched the back of his head "we are still waitin for Steve to get here"

"What about John has he been here yet?" she asked casually.

"Yea he got here like an hour ago he's in the room now I just came out into the hall to take a breather"

"Well then I'll let you get back to your dad then" she said turning to leave "tell him I was here"

"You're kidding me right … you flew all the way here from Tampa just to have me tell him you were here" he gave her a skeptical look.

"Me and John haven't exactly been on the best speaking terms and I don't want to start problems in front of your dad who just suffered from a major heart attack"

"I think you will do more damage not coming in seeing as he considers you a daughter besides John has enough common sense not to start a fight in front of him anyways"

"Ok but I'm only staying for a few minutes"

Dan wrapped his arm around her shoulders and walked with her into the room. John Sr. was sitting up alert and awake when they entered the room.

"Look what the cat dragged in" the older man smiled at her.

"You givin the nice nurses any trouble?" she asked.

"I'm being my naturally charming self" he replied. Which earned him a grin from the young woman.

"Let me guess you didn't bring any pictures of my grandkids either" he said.

"I think the distress I felt over your current state gives me an excuse to let this one slide" she said.

"What the hell good are you two kids how am I supposed to brag about my grandkids with no pictures?" he huffed.

"Dad please give it a rest" Matt said "you need to save your strength"

"Oh please boy if that heart attack was going to kill me it would have" Sr. scoffed.

John remained silent, he sat in his seat taking in everything around him … everything except her.

"So Ashley has living with John drove you crazy yet?" Johnny Fabulous asked with mild amusement.

"Umm … I don't"

"What she means to say dad is of course it doesn't" John spoke up for her.

"You know what I'm suddenly craving a candy bar" he said standing up "come on Ash I'll buy you one too"

"No thanks I'm fine" she stated.

"Now what kind of guy would I be if I didn't buy the mother of my children a candy bar" he insisted linking his arm with hers so he could lightly force her to go with him.

She crossed her arms immediately once he let her arm go when they left the room.

"I can't believe you" she hissed furiously "why wouldn't you tell them we don't live together anymore"

"Do you know how embarrassing it is" he replied in the same hushed tone.

"You can't lie to them"

"Listen my dad is only going to be staying at my house for a little while so do you think you can pretend that we are happy to be living in the same house " he begged her.

"No … I'm not lying to your dad" she protested.

"It isn't the first time" he retorted "remember the time we had sex in his bed and you lied and said we didn't"

"You swore that would never be mentioned ever again!" she quietly exclaimed.

"Desperate times call for desperate measures" he smirked at her.

"You'd use any excuse to get me to move back in with you" she gave him annoyed look before crossing her arms over her chest. She cocked her head to one side and John could tell she was getting ready for an argument.

He looked around before grabbing her arm once again. He walked with her down the hall a little ways before coming across an empty room. He opened the door and let her walk inside. He closed the door behind him and locked it. Turning to face her again he saw she wore a mask of confusion. He could also see a little fear in her gray-blue eyes.

"I'm not going to hurt you if that is what you are thinking" there was a little hurt in his voice "I just didn't want anyone we knew to overhear us"

"Am I really that disgusting to make you so repulsed by the thought of living with me?" he asked throwing his hands up in the air with frustration.

"No, John" she sighed but she figured he should have a reason "It's me … I have spent most of my life living in a bubble and for a while when I was living in Australia I felt free for the first time but then all the crap with Shane and rehab happened and I felt like if I was alone that I would relapse but now I know that I won't and I feel the need to live on my own again"

He understood what she was saying, he really did. He knew it couldn't have been easy for to live wit her over protective father, not that he blamed Chris for being that way given everything that had happened to the poor man and his family, he'd do the same thing.

"I just think it's pointless for you to pretend that you don't feel the same way about me that I feel about you" he countered.

"John in a perfect world I would run into your arms right now and tell you that I have always loved you and that I never want to let you go and we would grow old together while watching our kids grow up" she took a moment to think about what she would say next "but the world we live in is far from perfect and it scares me to know that our children have to go out into it. We have to be grown up for once and think about how things will affect Phinnigan and Faith, what happens if we do get together and things go down hill and we go through a bitter divorce, who gets stuck in the middle the two innocent children who feel they need to choose between mommy and daddy and I can't do that to them John … I won't"

"You done?" there was a hint of amusement in his baby blues.

"I don't see what you could find remotely funny about this" she was getting worked up.

John loved to see her like that, completely defensive and ready to jump at any moment. It was then that she was the most passionate.

"I swear you are always so grim" he retorted lightly almost in a teasing way "did it ever occur to you that maybe we might just last"

"You told me yourself a long time ago you were afraid of ending up like your parents"

"Yeah well you know what I'd rather not die alone" he said.

"So is this what this is some sort of mortality thing?" she asked.

"What is so hard so for to understand that I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you … god you know some woman would kill their first born children to have that honor"

"So go find one of them"

"You are impossible" he wanted to yell so badly but he didn't'.

"I'm glad you are finally learning"

"You know it's a good thing that you can't have biological children because they would end up being as pig-headed as you are"

She glared at him and even though she didn't want him to see it her eyes began to glass over. He knew his comment had really affected her. Not being able to have a biological child was her one weakness, her kryptonite if you will.

"Ash, I'm sorry I was out of line"

"It's fine" she replied coldly wiping her eyes.

"No it's not fine … if there was something I could do to help you I would do that I know how much it hurts you to not be able to have one of your own"

"Like I pointed out earlier life isn't fair so why not kick me while I'm down" she shrugged "I hope someone up there is laughing their ass off right now"

He wrapped his arms around her and she let him against her better judgment. Things between them became so confusing so fast and somewhere during this whole crazy thing they called life the stopped listening to each other.

"Why do we have to hurt each other so badly?" she asked.

"Because sometimes it's easier to hurt those you love rather than admitting it" he replied.

"I'm not ready to be with you right now" she replied honestly "maybe in time but not right now"

"Then I'll wait" he told her.

"That's just it" she pulled away from him "you shouldn't have to wait, you are a great guy and there are probably a million women out there that would be lucky to have you"

"But you are the only one I want and if I have to wait forever I will because that is how much you mean to me"

"You are a foolish man"

"A foolish man in love with a stubborn woman" he grinned "so will you come home?"

"Just until Fabo gets better and then after that we'll see" she was willing to compromise.

"Well if that is what it's gonna be then fine"

"We should be heading back now and don't forget buddy you owe me a candy bar" she smirked at him before going over to unlock the door.

"I love that woman" he shook his head before following her.


	35. Chapter 35

John sat in the comfortable plush couch of the backstage area of the Conan O'Brien show

John sat in the comfortable plush couch of the backstage area of the Conan O'Brien show. Smiling, his cell phone was at the moment glued to his ear. His over-zealous two and a half year old son was babbling away.

"Really mommy took you to see Dean play soccer" John exclaimed trying to make it sound like that was the most interesting thing in the world.

A knock on the door caused the three time WWE champ to look up. A stage hand let him know he had ten minutes until he had to be on stage.

"Listen buddy daddy has to go now but I want to tell you good night and I love you"

Phinnigan replied that back that he loved him too and handed the phone over to his mother.

"You gonna watch me tonight?" John asked.

"_Maybe if you make it worth while to me" she replied smirking, knowing full well that he was now sporting a frown._

Which of course he was "Fine if you don't want to watch it I can't make you"

"_Ok Nancy before you cry yourself to sleep I already have the Tivo set to record" was her reply._

He rolled his eyes "I gotta go but I'll see you guys in two days … are you going to be able to pick me up from the airport?"

"If I can get Fabo to swear to me that he won't smoke while I'm gone then yes I'll come get you"

"Has he been giving you trouble?" John asked.

"Not really, but I do think he hates me trying to take care of him"

"Well do what you can if the man insists on having another heart attack we can't really stop him"

"_You are right but I'll still keep my eye on him other than that everything is great, so don't worry about anything and have a good show"_

"Ok I'll talk to you later I guess"

He hung up the phone and threw it into his bag. Cracking his knuckles and rotating his neck back and forth to relieve a little tension he was building there. He left the room and made his way down the long corridor that led to the stage. He got to the dark blue curtain that reminded him very much of the curtain he had to stand behind before he made his way out to the ring every night. Upon hearing his name he walked out into the brightly lit stage, smiling and waving at the people as he passed them by. He greeted Conan with a smile and a handshake. They both took their seats and the interview began.

"Thanks for having me back man" John said.

"No thank you for being here" Conan replied.

"Dude you still have the biggest arms I have ever seen" Conan commented as he did every time John was on his show.

John grinned a little bit more "I'm telling ya man all you have to do is spend a little time with me in the gym and you could have arms like these too"

"I seriously doubt that" Conan shook his head a little.

"So it seems like every time you are here you are promoting something so what do you have for us tonight"

"Well Conan tonight I am here to talk about a subject that hits very close to home with me about six months back my niece Atiana was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes which until that time I knew almost nothing about"

"Is she ok?" Conan asked with concern. He after all had two children of his own so he knew how serious something like this could be.

"Yeah she's fine right now" he assured the host "but it really makes you think about things differently, diabetes is very serious"

"So how did you become a spokesman?" Conan asked.

"Well after I found out about Atiana I started searching the net and trying to find out everything I could just incase my kids might have it too and I began calling people who knew about diabetes and finally one day I got a call from a wonderful woman named Beth Pearson, who runs the ADA and she asked me to be the spokesperson" the younger man replied.

"Now how old are your kids?" Conan asked.

"Yeah two of them Phinnigan is two and a half as of yesterday and my little girl Faith is almost 3 months old" the father of two beamed with pride as he talked about his children.

"Now both kids are adopted correct?"

"Yeah, both kids are adopted from the same set of parents, we found Phinnigan abandoned in a parking lot only a few hours after he was born and then a few months ago his birth mother got in contact with us saying she had had another baby and wanted her to be with the same people who had her older brother so their mom talked me into it and that's how Mariah Faith entered our lives"

"Wait let me get this straight you found your son in a parking lot?" Conan asked shocked.

"Yeah, Me, Randy Orton, and my ex-girlfriend Ashley were sitting in my car in a Wal Mart parking lot and I could have sworn I heard a baby crying so we got out to look and there he was"

"Well you know what they say you can find anything at a Wal Mart" Conan joked which earned a nod and a shrug from the WWE superstar.

"So you just decided to adopt him?" Conan asked.

"Well Ashley felt somehow connected to the baby and she convinced me that we needed to do something to help him and two and a half years later he's a happy and healthy toddler who likes to play with his toy cars and get his older cousin Dean in trouble"

"Now Dean is Randy Orton's son right?"

"Right but we consider him a community child because we all share in on the parenting seeing as we all live together"

"So you and your ex-girlfriend live in the same house with your two kids and your best friend and his son live with you too" Conan asked incredulously.

"When you say it like that it sounds kinda crazy but it works for us I guess"

"So you have a boy and a girl do you notice any differences in raising them?" Conan asked.

"Yes, I mean Phinnigan is a boy so he's always running into things and yelling where Faith is more quiet and dainty. When Phinnigan was a baby and we would change him he'd just sit there and show you what he was working with where Faith even though she is so little if you undress her she covers herself up and what not"

"Well that's all we have time for tonight I want to thank you once again for coming onto the show and please give your brother and his wife my best also tell Ashley I said hi"

"I will do that believe me she still talks about meeting you that time backstage and how nice you were which she really didn't expect"

"Really what did she expect?" Conan asked momentarily forgetting about the show's time running out.

"I think she said she expected you to be some pompous jerk that wouldn't stop to talk to a fan"

Conan looked into the camera "Gee thanks Ashley".

"It's all good man she likes you which is more than a lot of other people can say" John shrugged once again "she doesn't like many people"

John knew Ashley was going to kill him the next time she saw him but he was just stating the truth.

"Have Springsteen on and invite her to sit in the audience and you'll be her new best friend … hell she'll love you more than she does me"

Conan shot a glance at Max Weinstein, whom we all know is the drummer for the E Street Band. Max just laughed and shook his head.

"Come on man you'd make her dream come true" John pretended to beg.

"We'll see" Max said.

"Ok now we really have to go but stop by again soon" Conan and John shook hands one more time before the camera stopped rolling.

A/N: I know this chapter sucked big time but I was watching the last John appearance on the Conan O'Brien show that I recorded and I got the idea to write this. So review. By the way I have a few story banners up on my profile so check them out cause they kick ass. More should be up soon if I can think of something worthy of writing.


	36. Chapter 36

Ashley sat curled on the couch in the living room with her feet tucked underneath her

Chapter 36: The Good the Bad and the Naked

March 13, 2009

Ashley sat curled on the couch in the living room with her feet tucked underneath her. She flipped a page of the book she was reading and continued reading. John, who was sitting on the couch with her stood up and stretched.

"I'm gonna go take a shower" he told her.

"Ok goodnight" was her reply.

He gave her a kiss on the cheek before leaving to take his shower. Things had been much better for them as of late. John seemed to understand where she stood on the whole relationship thing and he didn't bring it up anymore. The kids were happy to be back in the place they had become so used to. Both Phinnigan and Faith had been miserable at the apartment and would cry for their daddy all the time. Dean seemed a little more chipper too. He wouldn't admit it but he liked sharing a room with Phinnigan. The way he saw it Phinnigan was like his little brother and even though he annoyed him to no end all the time he still loved the toddler. She yawned, she was getting tired and as soon as she finished the chapter she was reading she was going to go to bed. She closed her eyes and tried her best to stretch out her muscles. As if by some sort of magic she felt a pair of large muscular hands began massaging her shoulders. She moaned a little bit in enjoyment and kept her eyes closed. Then she felt a pair of soft lips touch the exposed area of her collar bone. She wasn't sure why John was doing this to her but she wasn't about to stop him. Even though her mind was screaming at her to stop this thing before it got any more complicated.

His hands left her shoulders and roamed down to the neckline of her shirt. They rested there for a moment before diving into the unknown. She wore no bra which left him with all the access her wanted to her ample breasts. He ran the pads of his thumbs over her nipples and smirked as they hardened. He could hear her moans of pleasure and wanted nothing more than to take her in his arms and make love to her.

"You like that huh baby?" he whispered in her ear.

Her eyes shot open on alarm. "R … Randy" she stuttered.

Ashley shot straight up in her bed. It had all been a dream. She was sweating and breathing heavily. She could feel her body trembling almost as if she had had a nightmare. SCREW THAT what she just had was the worst kind of nightmare possible. She ran to her bathroom and gagged a little as she kneeled against the white porcelain toilet. Nothing would come up though. She splashed some water on her face and brushed her teeth. John, who had been heading past her room to get to his own peered into the dark room.

"Ashley are you ok?" he asked softly.

"Yeah" she replied making her way back to her bed.

John took a moment to check on Faith. He walked over to her crib which was located towards the far wall of the room. She had managed to kick the covers off of herself in her sleep. Her thumb was in her mouth as she lay sprawled out. She was sleeping on her side with her arms spread over her head. He smiled before bending down to kiss his daughter's cheek. Her eyelids fluttered a little but she never woke up. He left the crib and had a seat on the bed. Ashley was now sitting against the headboard with her knees up to her chest.

"You sure you are ok?" he asked concern written all over his blue eyes.

"Yeah I just had a bad dream" she replied. He could almost hear the fear in her voice. He had no idea what she had dreamt about but whatever it was scared the hell out of her.

"You wanna talk about it?" he asked.

"Not really" she said pulling the covers back over her body. She shivered a little as the felt the now cold sheets touch her body. She was wearing a white spaghetti strapped tank top and short plaid pajama shorts.

"Do you want me to lay with you for a little while?" he offered.

Although her rational mind told her to say no she nodded despite herself. He pulled the covers down and climbed into bed next to her. She offered him one of her pillows and in return he put an arm around her. She snuggled up closer to him and closed her eyes. He closed his eyes as well and soon enough they were both asleep.

John was still there the next morning when Ashley woke up to give Faith her breakfast. She smiled and kissed his cheek before getting up to feed her daughter who was angrily wailing at her to get up.

"Ok Missy Faith I'm awake" she took the baby into her arms and rocked her a little.

Faith calmed down the moment she realized she wasn't being ignored and put her fist into her mouth. She chewed on it until it was covered with drool. Ashley grimaced a little when she saw the drool covered fist. Ashley and the baby left the room and ventured towards the kitchen. Ashley was surprised to find Johnny Fabulous already awake.

"What are you doing up so early?" she asked quickly removing the mug of steaming hot coffee out of his hands.

"No caffeine" she reprimanded him.

"Decaf" he replied taking his morning addiction back from her.

She went over to the counter where he had left the canister of coffee grounds sure enough they were decaffeinated. She shook her head in defeat.

"You have won this round old man"

Placing Faith in her swing she got everything ready to make her daughter's breakfast. She pulled two jars of baby food out of the cabinet before turning to the infant.

"Faith do you want bananas or sweet potatoes with your cereal this morning?" she asked the baby in a silly voice. She just laughed and grunted a little in response.

"You know when my kids were little we never talked to them like they were idiots" Johnny Fabo added his two cents into the conversation.

"Yeah well look how your kids turned out" she replied "chasing each other around with chainsaws and sledge hammers while their father watched wrestling upstairs … thank god Carol had some order in that house"

"Hey two of my boys are cops so obviously we did something right" he defended himself.

"What about the other three?" Ashley asked placing her hands on her hips.

"Like I said two of my sons are cops"

Ashley grinned at the elder Cena. It was too easy to get him worked up and with his heart in its weakened state she knew she should really leave him alone but sometimes it wasn't that simple.

"Anyways Faith we are going with the bananas this morning why you ask well because that's what I would choose if I were you"

"Faith tell your mother that you have your own mind and maybe you don't like bananas"

"Faith tell your grandfather that if he doesn't stop talking right now your mommy is going to put him in a home" she sweetly threatened the older man.

"I am far too young to be put into a home and because you are not related it won't work"

"So I'll get John drunk and marry him and then throw your ass in a home and then divorce him"

"Who's getting drunk and married?" A sleepy Randy asked walking into the kitchen. He was shirtless as he always was early in the morning which had never bothered Ashley in the past but today it did he body stiffened uncomfortably. The smile she had previously worn was now gone as memories of last night's nightmare re-entered her mind.

"No one" she replied a little too fast for her own liking.

"You ok?" he asked.

"Yeah I'm fine" she lied. She found herself staring at Randy's broad chest a little longer than necessary.

"See something you like Ash?" Randy asked smirking.

"Eww" she shook her head in disgust.

"Damn Ash am I that horrible looking?" Randy asked a little offended.

"No Rans you are just like my brother so thinking about you in any way that might even be the littlest bit sexual can reduce me to physically vomiting"

"Umm … ok I guess"

Johnny Fabo watched the two young people interact. He could tell Ashley was hiding something from the third generation superstar. He grinned to himself while trying to figure out what it could have been.

"Mornin guys" a still half asleep John carried Phinnigan into the room. He put the pajama clad boy down on the floor and he made a b-line straight to his mother hugging her leg.

"Phinny honey I have to feed Faith" she told the toddler.

"No, mommy hold me" he whined.

"You want to feed the baby?" she asked John.

"Of course I'll feed my little princess" John cooed to the infant. Faith squealed and kicked her feet excitedly as John came over to her holding a bottle and a bowl filled with baby cereal and bananas.

"Mr. Phinnigan explain to me why daddy or Uncle Randy or Grandpa couldn't have held you?" Ashley asked the toddler.

"I want mommy" he stated placing his head on her shoulder.

"Can't argue with that logic" she retorted rubbing her still tired little boy's back.

After breakfast Becky called and asked Ashley if she would attend her first doctor's appointment because Connor couldn't get off of work in time. Reluctantly she agreed figuring she could get to know the young woman carrying her future niece or nephew a little better. After the appointment was all over she was so glad she had went. They got to see the first ultrasound and they could even hear the baby's heartbeat. Although Ashley was really excited for her brother and the mother of his child it was bittersweet because she knew that she would never be able to hear her own child's heartbeat as it grew inside her. But she sucked up her sadness and promised to treat the young woman to any kind of ice cream she wanted.

Becky decided on a strawberry frappe while Ashley stuck with the traditional vanilla soft serve with rainbow jimmies.

"Becky can I tell you something?" Ashley asked "something that should remain a secret"

"Sure" Becky replied taking a sip of her frappe.

"Well I kinda had a dream last night …" Ashley trailed off not really knowing how to tell Becky about her dream.

"OoOoOhhhhhhh was it a sex dream" Becky giggled showing at once how young she still was.

Ashley face turned a bright crimson this was not how she wanted this conversation to go.

"So what everyone has sex dreams … one time I had one about Batista, you see we went to go see Scooby Doo 3 and well let's just say he really knows how to use his tongue. But the thing is I hate Batista so I really don't know why I would be having a sex dream about him but I do know if Scooby Doo 3 ever comes out I am not seeing it"

"Ok Becky too much personal information I wish it was someone simple like Batista him I could handle"

"Well who was it … wait it wasn't Connor was it" the young girl asked concerned that her future child's aunt might be some sort of incestuous pervert.

"Umm … hell fucking no" was Ashley's reply.

"That's a relief" she said taking another sip of her drink.

"It was Randy" Becky spit out what was in her mouth in surprise.

Ashley wiped the little hints of frappe of her face with mild disgust.

"Sorry about that" Becky remarked earnestly "I just didn't expect you to say Randy"

"Believe me I didn't expect to have the dream and I still feel nauseous about it"

"How come you are telling me this instead of Stephanie I mean she is your best friend?" Becky asked.

"I figured since you are carrying my future niece or nephew maybe we should be closer" Ashley told her.

Becky nodded touched that she trusted her that much.

"Besides Steph tells Paul everything and even thought I love him he has a huge ass mouth and then Randy would find out and then he would never let me live it down"

"Well I'm getting hot what say we go back to your place and watch TV" Becky suggested.

"Whatever the pregnant woman wants"

The drive back to John's house was pleasantly silent. Each woman was thinking about their own things that they had going on at the moment. As soon as Becky got inside the house she headed straight for the living room and plopped down on the couch. Taking off her shoes. She grabbed the remote that until then was resting on the arm of the couch.

"Oh Camp Rock!" she exclaimed focusing her attention on the television screen.

"What the hell are you watching?" Ashley asked walking into the living room a few minutes later.

"Camp Rock"

"Isn't that that Disney Channel movie that came out last year" Ashley asked raising an eyebrow.

"Yes but it has Joe Jonas in it" Becky replied "he's soooooo hot"

"Isn't he like 12?" Ashley asked.

"No, his birthday is August 15th, 1989 which makes him 20 only which is the same age I am" Becky hissed at her.

"Besides are you telling me you don't have a celebrity crush" Becky added.

"Johnny Depp" Ashley commented her eyes getting all dreamy for a moment. She had a seat John's recliner and watched the movie with Becky. After the movie was over Becky looked over to Ashley who actually had tears in her eyes.

"Are you crying?" Becky asked already knowing the answer.

"It's was so beautiful … Peggy finally crawled out from Tess' s shadow and sang that amazing song and then she won the trophy and the chance to sing with Shane and Shane forgave Mitchie and she finally sang her song and Shane realized she was his mystery girl all along … oh my god I'll be ok" Ashley practically was sobbing by now.

"Ok I'm officially afraid to bring this baby into the world" Becky remarked.

"Well it's a little too late for that kiddo" Ashley replied before getting up to grab a tissue from the bathroom.

She returned a few seconds later finally calmed down but it was easy to see she had been crying. John and Randy returned home with Fabo and the kids just a minute later. John met the girls in the living room and looked at Ashley's red puffy eyes.

"Is everything alright?" he asked concerned once again.

"Yeah everything is fine" Becky gave him a smile "just a little female bonding going on"

"Should I be scared?" he asked.

"Very much so" Becky said.

"Note taken, now if you ladies are hungry me and Randy brought home some dinner"

"Sweet food" Becky got up from the couch and went to find food.

"Are you sure you are ok first you were sick last night and now you look as if you have been crying. What's going on?" he asked.

"Nothing I swear we were just watching a movie that made me a little misty eyed"

"Are you sure that's all it is?"

"You have my word"

And yet he still didn't believe her. But for right now he would let it go even if he didn't want to.

"Come on let's get some food before everyone else eats it" she grabbed his hand and they walked into the dining room.

A/N: This chapter goes out to my two best reviewers Dominique and Tiffany who both inspired me in different ways to write this chapter. You guys rock!


	37. Chapter 37

_Chapter 37: Wait ... What?_

"Dude I'm telling you one of us has to marry her" John entered his locker room while rolling his eyes. Randy trailed behind. Randy shut the door behind him before grabbing a chair from the corner of the room and turning it backwards so that he was leaning on the back of the chair while facing John who was seated on one of the many wooded benches.

"I know I'm going to regret asking this because believe me I always do but why does on of us have to marry Ashley?"

"Dude because she is literally both of our wife anyways well in every way but the sexual part but then again you'd know a lot more recent details of her sexual life then I would" he gave the older man a wink.

"Stop winking at me like that " John retorted.

"Anyways like I was saying she's the mother to all three of our kids, she cooks for us and cleans up after us and she irons our underwear. My mom never even did that the whole time I lived with her"

"She doesn't have to do all that stuff" John pointed out.

"But she does and never complains about it"

"So why rock the boat?" John asked "I mean things are good right now"

"Are you telling me you don't want to marry her?" Randy asked.

"I never said that I'm just kinda wondering why you want to marry her … isn't she like your sister"

"I wouldn't go as far as saying she is my sister because then that would have made sleeping with her really awkward"

"Yeah very true … wait … WHAT?? You slept with Ashley?" John asked shocked.

"Yeah a long time ago before I started with OVW"

"But you slept with her , how did I not know about this?"

"I don't know I guess it really never came up in conversation I mean I didn't even know you two had dated each other until a few months after I met you and we were good friends then so I guess I didn't want to piss you off by telling you that I slept with your ex-girlfriend"

John grimaced as he forced himself to swallow the idea of his best friend sleeping with the woman that he loved.

"I'm serious dude marry the woman or I will" John could tell by Randy's eyes that part of him really was serious and that he really would marry Ashley if given the chance.

John cracked his knuckles in annoyance. "Can we stop talking about this … if she wants to marry one of us then fine but I don't want to pressure her into something because that always turns out badly and she ends up doing the opposite of what you want her to do anyways"

"Yeah she's kinda a pain in the ass that way" Randy agreed.

"I just wish I knew what would help speed up the whole getting Ashley to love me the way she used to process" John said.

"Well you know Ashley better than anyone do something for her that she would love" Randy suggested.

"Like what?" John asked.

"Well what does Ashley love … her kids, animals … you could buy her a dog. No that wouldn't work … hmm … she also loves going to the movies, talking on the phone and listening to music"

"That's it Randy I'll write her a song!" John exclaimed.

"I beg your pardon " Randy blinked a few times "you don't know how to write a song"

"I wrote all the freestyles on my album" John pointed out.

"Yeah but writing a song is completely different, you have to write all the music and decide what instruments you want to mesh with the lyrics and it takes people years to write and record songs … just ask Hardy or even call Amy up she'll tell you it's not easy … you have a better chance of getting into a head on collision with Springsteen and throwing him into the backseat of your car before forcing the man against his will to meet Ashley"

"If only I could get that lucky" John complained looking up at the ceiling as if asking whatever higher power that would listen to help him.

"This whole writing a song thing is a ridiculous idea" Randy said.

"You wanna put money on it?" John taunted him.

"I'll put fifty bucks to the fact that you can't write a halfway decent song and then I'll add another hundred to the fact that I can write a better song then you can"

"It's a bet then" John held out his hand for Randy to shake.

"Maybe the better man win" Randy shook the older man's hand.

A/N: I hrt the person who inspired this chapter and she knows who she is. For those of you who are confused the Future Mrs. Randy Orton (this is of course after Randy gets his head out of his ass and leaves Sam) lol she knows who she is.


	38. Chapter 38

"Ashley in about two seconds I'm joining you in there" Randy banged on the bathroom door.

Michael Jackson's Thriller was blaring from within and Randy was getting more and more impatient with every passing second. He was amazed at how conceded Ashley could be. She knew other people would need to take a shower and here she was in there for well over 45 minutes. Finally he had enough he wanted to exact revenge and what better revenge could be then not only flushing the toilet on his selfish best friend but ripping back the curtain to see her face as the water temperature changed to a new uncomfortable level. Smirking to himself he tiptoed into the bathroom and quietly made his way over to the white porcelain toilet. Gripping the cool metal handle he brought it down and a loud flush could be heard mixing with the soulful notes coming from the radio. He heard a yelp and without thinking twice he ripped back the light blue shower curtains to reveal not Ashley but some stranger. Randy's face immediately turned crimson. The young woman tried desperately to cover herself but Randy had seen everything. She was about 5'7 with ebony locks that reached the middle of her back. Her skin was the color of sweet chocolate and she had the longest legs randy had ever seen. He stood there too flabbergasted to do anything else but stand there with his eyes popping out of his skull.

"Is this how all you Americans introduce yourselves?" she asked her crisp British accent shining through "well don't just stand there like a prat hand me that towel"

With his mouth still agape he did as he was told and handed her the towel which was resting nicely upon the white marble countertop next to the sink. She wrapped the soft yellow terrycloth towel around her slender body before returning her gaze upon him. Her dark brown eyes were fixed into a glare and Randy nervously swallowed.

"I ... I'm so sorry I thought you were Ashley" he tried to explain.

"Why would you want to see my cousin naked?" she gave him an accusing glance.

"I swear it's not what you think"

"How could you possibly know what I am thinking right now?" she asked.

"ASHLEY" Randy yelled.

Ashley appeared a few minutes later sporting a confused look. Faith was in her arms and she too wore a curious look as she stared at her Uncle Randy.

"What's going on?" Ashley asked.

"He ..." the woman who claimed to be Ashley's cousin pointed her finger towards Randy "thought I was you and decided to get a free show while I was in the shower"

Ashley didn't even bother to hide her laughter. "Oh Randal you are such an ass"

"You could have told me we had a house guest" Randy remarked annoyed.

"I thought John would have told you that my cousin Dommy was coming to stay with us for a week or so until her apartment downtown is ready"

"So how are you two related ... what I mean to say is ..." Ashley cut him off.

"What are you trying to say Randal" Ashley eyed him dangerously.

"Well I mean you are so fair skinned and your cousin isn't"

"What's the matter Randy you never heard of Black Irish" Domonique decided to join in the fun.

"Wait a minute you are black??" Ashley pretended to be shocked.

"See now look what you did you let out the deep **dark** family secret" she emphasized the word dark to be funny.

"I still can't believe you never told me" Ashley shook her head in shame.

"It's ok honey Dommy will make it better as soon as she gets dressed" she told her older cousin in a tone that a parent would use when talking to a child who needed to be cheered up.

Then she left Ashley and Randy to stare at each other. Ashley stood smirking and if Faith had not been in her arms they would have been crossed.

"I don't want to talk about this" was all he said before he too walked out pf the bathroom.

"You know Faithy sometimes life is just too comedic" she laughed

Faith tipped her head a little so she could look at her mother. She gave her a toothless grin and began to kick her legs a little in excitement. Her fingers went to her mouth and she began to gum them happily.

"I don't understand how you can take pleasure in chewing your own fingers but that's just me"

She too left the bathroom making sure to shut it tightly behind her so there was less of a chance that a certain toddler would go in there and get into her makeup as he had done many times in the past.

"Mama I pwetty" he would always say turning around to show her his lipstick and blush covered face. She did admit in the past she had taken a couple of pictures of him like that and sent them to John just to get him a little annoyed because no man wants their son to wear make up in any form especially men like John Cena. Although he was ok with people being able to choose their own sexual preference he preferred that his own son was straight. Not that wearing make up necessarily made someone gay he'd just rather not take his chances.

Randy met up with John in the hallway.

"Dude you didn't tell me Ashley had a hot cousin" Randy punched John hard in the arm.

"Damn man that hurt … the last time I saw Domonique she was like 17 with braces and big ass glasses so trust me I was just as surprised as you were at the hottie I picked up from the airport" John defended himself.

"Why do you ask?"

"Cause I just got an eyeful of Ashley's very naked cousin" John grinned in amusement.

"Did you like it?" he asked.

"Dude shut up" Randy retorted.

"Come on man how long has it been since you've had sex? It has to be at least 2 months ago"

"Why do I even bother telling you things" Randy threw up his hands in frustration before hitting John in the shoulder again.

"Fuck man that was in the exact same spot" John winced rotating his injured arm around.

Ashley walked by them but Randy wrapped his arm around her shoulder holding her there.

"How could you not tell me you had a hot cousin"

"Gee I dunno maybe cause I am a female who doesn't find other females attractive … especially ones I'm related to"

"Well you've been holding out on me"

"I'm so sorry" she rolled her eyes removing his hand from her shoulder "now if you excuse me I have things to do"

Later that day …

"Hey guys have you seen John?" Ashley asked Domonique and Fabo giving them a rather confused look that also sported a hint of annoyance.

"Haven't seen him since breakfast" Fabo replied from his spot on the navy blue carpet where he was teaching Dean how to play checkers.

"Me either"

Ashley frowned a little bit "John promised the kids that we would all go to the zoo as a family and now I can't find him"

"Go ask Randy maybe he has seen him"

"Lord knows that man has seen enough today" Dominique winked at her cousin.

"Yeah maybe" Ashley left to go find Randy.

She pocked her head into his room. The third generation superstar was lying on his stomach with a notepad in from of him. He was humming to himself while writing. He swore under his breath as he erased something.

"Rans whatcha doin?" Ashley asked.

"Nothing" he looked up from the notepad "Can I help you with something?"

"Yeah I can't find John have you seen him?" she asked.

"In the office" he said returning his attention to what he was working on.

"Nice talkin to ya Orton" she mumbled to herself before heading to the office.

"John" she knocked before entering the comfortably furnished room with the mahogany desk and tall backed leather chair. Upon the desk sat the flat screen monitor for John's incredibly amazing Alienwear computer.

"You ready to go?" she asked him.

"Where?" he asked looking up from his own notepad. He wouldn't meet her eyes directly in fear that he would accidentally ruin his own surprise.

"You promised the kids that we would go to the zoo as a family" she reminded him.

"Umm … I can't go" he shifted uncomfortably in his chair still not looking at her.

"But you promised them"

"Look I'm busy so leave me alone" it came out a little rougher than he would have wanted it but he needed to get her to leave before he revealed his secret to her because everyone knew he had a very hard time keeping secrets from her.

"Whatever" she turned and left the room.

She was completely pissed and all she knew was if John Cena kept this new mindset of getting their children's hope up and then being rude to her she was going to hurt him … badly.


	39. Chapter 39

"Dommy why do guys suck so badly?" Ashley asked her younger cousin while they enjoyed some quiet early morning gym time. She pedaled hard on her exercise bike trying to burn off some of her annoyance. She long brunette hair was thrown into a sloppy bun as her chest heaved making the top of her breasts rise up against the restraint of the sports bra she was wearing.

Domonique who was clad in a similar workout outfit took a moment to study her cousin before opening her mouth "It could be because they don't think with their right heads"

"I still can't believe John just blew me and the kids off like that" the elder girl blew a piece of hair out from in front of her face.

"Maybe he had a legitimate reason" she gently tested the waters "it's not like you have spoken to him since yesterday"

"So you think I overreacted huh?" she asked.

"Just a little John truly cares about you so there has to be a good reason for his sudden rudeness"

"Maybe …"

They took their time returning back to the house. The kids had been fed and bathed by the time they returned and as soon as they walked through the door Randy was rushing Domonique back out of it.

Ashley looked around the empty living room knowing that John was somewhere inside the house. It was then she realized how alone they were.

After stepping out of the shower she threw on an old pair of raggedy sweats and a white tank top. Throwing her hair up once again she sighed before sliding her bare feet into her comfortable dear foam slippers and left the bathroom. John was waiting for her in the living room, she passed by him on her way to the kitchen, He followed her, wrapping his arms around her waist as she was bent over in the fridge rummaging through it.

"We're going out," he announced.

"My ass isn't going anywhere with you" she replied bitterly.

"I had to tell your son that his daddy was too busy to come with the rest of his family to the zoo and it broke his little heart"

"I promise I'll make it up to him" there was honest regret in his eyes "but for right now I'm making it up to his mommy"

"I'm still pissed at you"

"Girl I swear if you don't get into the car now I will carry your behind out the door"

She relented when she saw the excitement in his blue orbs. She allowed him to take her by the hand and lead her out to his GTO.

"See we are even taking your favorite car" he said trying to get some kind of excitement out of her.

"It's your favorite car too jackass"

John helped her into the car and shut her door for her. He hopped into the driver's side and started the engine.

"Where are we going?" she asked.

"It's a surprise"

"I hate surprises," she mumbled to herself.

"We're here" he got out of the car.

She looked around puzzled and having no idea where they were. She stepped out of the car also and as she did a huge 747 flew overhead the sudden rush of air almost knocked her over. John put his arm around her in order for her to keep her balance.

"You remember when we first started dating and we would sit on the hood of my jeep and just watch the airplanes go by and talk about anything and everything?" he asked.

"Yes I do" she found herself thinking back to those simple time quite a bit lately.

She had a seat on the hood of the car with her back resting against the windshield and he followed suit.

"Did you ever think life would be like this?" she suddenly asked him.

"No but then again I can't say I mind it too much" he replied.

"I think about those simple times quite a bit lately … John when did we go from those two careless kids to the people we vowed never to be"

"What do you mean?"

"I couldn't even imagine being in an argument with you back then and now that's all we do" she shrugged.

"It's not healthy not to argue," he pointed out.

"John I'm trying to be serious here" she sighed.

"What do you want from me Ash?" he asked her.

"I don't know I just want to feel the way we used to … don't get me wrong I love our kids and that will never change and I would die for both of them but do you ever find yourself thinking what if we had gotten to that Wal-Mart 30 minutes later … or what if Phinnigan never cried or we never heard him or Kelly never asked you to stop or I never became attached to Phin … I mean sometimes I could go crazy just thinking up different scenarios"

"Do you regret adopting Phin and Faith?"

"No did you miss the part where I said I loved both kids and would die for them. I don't know it just seems so surreal I mean this time two and a half years ago we were just best friends"

"I loved you then too I always have since the first moment I saw you cry at that beach party. I remember it like it was yesterday there you were trembling and I can remember thinking that all I wanted to do at that moment was take you in my arms and make you feel safe forever"

"Did you really?" she asked kinda surprised.

"Yes and for the record I like where life has taken us and I would never change anything except for maybe agreeing to our breakup without a fight"

"Why did you agree?" she finally found the courage to ask him the question that had been on her mind for a while now.

"I figured that having you as a friend was better than taking the chance of not having you in my life at all"

"Why would you sacrifice yourself like that?" she couldn't understand why he would do that to himself and for the first time she felt ashamed of herself for putting him through so much torment.

She turned away from him utterly ashamed. She couldn't find the strength to look him in the eyes. He reached over and placed his palm under her chin picking up her face to look at him.

"I didn't tell you that to make you feel bad I told you because I thought you should know that I would do anything for you"

"You are so stupid" there were tears in her eyes.

"I know I am but if being stupid means I can have you then I don't want to be any other way"

"I'm still not ready to commit just yet," she told him.

"I said I would wait and I meant it when you are ready I'll be here"

"You are too good for me," she said.

"No I'm just a man lucky enough to have found his other half"

She leaned into him and they sat there watching airplanes until after the sun had set. They talked for a little while but most of the time was spent in silent contemplation. Ashley finally realized that maybe the thought of being with a man forever wasn't as scary as she originally imagined.


	40. Chapter 40

_Chapter 40: Something To Say_

"That man is going to be the death of me!" Ashley exclaimed barging into her cousin's room. Domonique looked up from the book she was reading.

"Gimme a heart attack why don't ya" the younger woman replied.

"What's John doing now?" Domonique asked putting her bookmark into her book before closing it.

Ashley plopped down onto the bed and stared up at the ceiling. "He's being so damn hot and cold, one minutes he tells me he loves me and will wait for me forever and the next he wants nothing to do with me" she threw up her hands in frustration "and he's being so damn secretive"

"I don't know what to tell you girl because I'm not a mind reader so I have no idea what goes on in his head and I thank God for that because I could only imagine what goes on in that head of his"

"You and me both cousin … you and me both"

"So what's he doing now?"

"He's putting Faith to sleep" she rolled her eyes "you know he didn't even want Faith in the beginning"

"Well he certainly changed his mind real quickly because sometimes you have to pry Faith away from him"

"All I wanted to do was go for a nice walk with John is that too much to ask?"

"No it isn't"

"I didn't think so" Ashley huffed "that man makes me so mad sometimes"

"So divorce his ass … oh yeah you guys aren't married" Domonique laughed at what she thought to be her own cleverness.

"You'd better sleep with one eye open tonight cousin" Ashley threatened.

The Next Day …

The doorbell rang distracting Ashley from the breakfast dishes. She wiped her hands on a nearby dish towel before going to answer the door. She stopped to look at herself in foyer mirror before reaching the door. Much to her surprise John's cousin Marc was standing on the other side of the door.

"Hey baby gurl" he pulled her into a fierce hug.

"Marc … can't breathe" a near asphyxiated Ashley painfully wheezed.

"Sorry" he grinned sheepishly.

"So what brings you out here?" she asked.

"Do I need a reason to visit family?" he casually retorted.

"Well no of course not" she said letting him inside "it's just a surprise to see you that's all"

"So where is my cousin?" he asked.

"He's locked himself in his office you can try to see if he'll let you in but I doubt it because I haven't seen that man for more than an hour the whole time he's been home"

"What's he doing in there?" Marc asked giving her a questioning look.

"Be damned if I know"

"You look a little stressed" he observed.

"Nah … I'm ok" she lied. She really share with someone her frustrations with John but she really felt that his cousin wasn't the right person to tell.

"Come on Ash we are friends right and if you can't confide in your friends then who can you confide in"

She thought about what he said for a few moments before nodding in agreement. Maybe it would be good to tell Marc, he was close to John and maybe he could shed some insight on what he was thinking and why. They moved into the living room and both had a seat on the couch. Ashley didn't speak right away trying very hard to phrase her words so that the substitute teacher turned rapper would not get offended.

"Well John has been acting very strange lately and it's driving me crazy" she said "sometimes he's all affectionate and then other times he doesn't even want to be in the same room or even talk to me"

"Did you guys have a fight or anything?" Marc asked.

"No, ever since I moved back in to help take care of Fabo everything has been fine"

"And the kids do you think they have been stressing him out?"

"Nope when he's home he tries to spend as much time being with them as possible, he plays with them and reads to them, rocks them to sleep, and he's always hugging and kissing them"

"Have you asked Randy about his behavior?"

"Yeah and he is no help either"

"Well where is Randy right now maybe he'll tell me something"

"He and Dommy took all 3 kids out for the day and I think Fabo went fishing with some of the neighbors"

"So it's just me and you"

"Pretty much yeah"

"I think you need a day of fun" he said. "come on" he grabbed her hand as he stood up.

"Marc … I can't I have dishes to finish and then I have to throw some laundry in"

"You need to stop being June Clever and start having some fun and you are coming with me and I'm not taking no for an answer.

She took a moment to really take Marc in. His eyes were blue like John's but they were a darker blue. His face was rounder where John's was more chiseled and defined. He sported a thinly trimmed lineup where John preferred to keep is face free of any facial hair. But they had the same goofy lopsided way of smiling. When either man smiled she felt herself smiling as well.

"Fine" she relented "but just for a little while"

Marc took her for a quick burger and they caught an early afternoon movie. The theater was having a special showing of Mama Mia which against Marc's better judgment he let Ashley convince him to see. It was a lot of fun and they both found themselves singing along with the songs they knew. Laughing heartily they stumbled through the front door.

"I haven't had that much fun in a long time" she wiped her eyes, she had been laughing so hard she had begun to cry.

"I'm glad I could help" he gave her a smile.

It was then that she realized that all that she was really bothered by was she felt that no one was listening to her and that her biggest problem with John was she felt like he was neglecting her.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Marc asked moving a piece of fallen hair behind her ear.

It was instantly noticeable how close they were. She wanted him to kiss her, and as if he was reading her thoughts he brought his lips down to meet hers. Ashley was amazed how good of a kisser Marc was, not that it really surprised her because look who his cousin was. He broke the kiss first.

"Ash … I'm sorry I shouldn't have done that … I got caught up in the moment"

"There is no need to apologize Marc we are two grown adults and I don't know about you but I have no one to answer to"

"My cousin loves you" he said.

"If your cousin really loved me then don't you think it would have been him I was spending the afternoon with" she had a point.

"I just don't want to do anything you are going to regret"

"I'm a big girl Marc and I wouldn't have let you kiss me if I didn't want it"

This time it was her who kissed him and once again he pulled away from her. She let out a frustrated sigh and gave him a perplexed look.

"Do women usually have to work this hard to get anywhere with you?" she asked.

"No … but most girls I get involved with I haven't know since they were 19 and none of them share two children with my cousin" he pointed out.

"Where's your sense of adventure?" she asked him taking a moment to lick her lips.

"Oh I can do adventure" he said "I can do adventure very well"

She raised an eyebrow at him "Then show me Predka show me that you can be Tarzan"

"I have to ask you one more time are you sure … John is in the house"

"Watch this" she walked over to John's office door. Marc followed and watched as she knocked and stuck her head in.

"Hey John" she greeted him.

"Not now Ashley I'm busy" Marc could hear him say.

"But I wanted to ask you a question" she said.

"Whatever it is go for it"

"Ok if you insist" she shut the door behind her.

"See what I'm putting up with" she sighed.

"Well I mean John did give us permission … sort of"

"Why yes he did didn't he" she said pulling him into her bedroom.

1 Hour Later …

"Ash … Ash where are you I have something I want to show you" John raced around excitedly looking for the woman he loved. He had finally finished his song he even gave it a title Why (Are We Still Friends). He was proud of what he had accomplished and he was totally gonna rub Randy's face in it.

"Ashley" he yelled once again nearing her bedroom.

The door was open a crack. Thinking that she was reading a book or taking a nap he didn't even bother to knock.

"OH MY GOD" John's retinas burned within his skull.

He stumbled out of the room and managed to get himself onto the couch. The woman he loved was sleeping with another man in his home … in the same room where his baby daughter slept. To make matters even worse the man she was sleeping with was his own family … someone who he considered to be a brother.

"John man this isn't what you think it is" Marc was the first one to retreat from the room.

"It looks like you were sleeping with Ashley to me" but the crazy thing he wasn't mad at his cousin. He was just really really disappointed with him.

Ashley left the room about a minute later. She stood a few inches next to Marc. John couldn't meet her eyes. He knew if he did he wouldn't be able to keep his cool.

"What I don't understand is you don't want to be in a relationship with me but you'll fuck my cousin"

"John this wasn't some attempt to hurt you" she started but was soon cut off.

"You knew how I felt about you, I told you I was willing to wait and then you go and do this"

"I also know you have been ignoring me these past 3 weeks" she shot back at him "even today remember when I went into your office earlier do you remember what you said. Whatever it is go for it. Those were your exact words"

"Ignoring you … I have not been ignoring you" he defended himself.

"Yes you have you come home and play with the kids and then you head straight for your office, I'm lucky if I can get you to come out and eat with the rest of us"

"Do you want to know what I was doing in the office all that time?" he asked furiously. His own good intentions were being thrown into his face.

"No I don't if you wanted for me to know you would have told me" she replied.

"You are so stupid did it ever occur to you I was doing something for you but I wanted it to be a surprise" he yelled.

"Well how the hell am I supposed to know what goes on in your head" she yelled back.

"GET OUT" he finally yelled.

"John you don't mean that" Marc said.

"Marc stay out of it" John shot him a glare.

"You are bluffing" she said.

"I'm completely serious leave now or I will call the police" he threatened.

"Where the hell am I supposed to go?" she asked.

"I don't care but you need to get the hell away from me or so help me I won't be held responsible for my actions"

"Fine I'll go" she turned and went back into her room.

She returned 20 minutes later with her bags packed. She didn't even bother looking at him as she exited through the front door.

Randy and Domonique were heading up the walkway with the kids. They were smiling and holding hands until they saw Ashley's face. There were tears in her eyes and seeing her with her bags packed they knew something bad must have happened. She bent down in front of Phinnigan who had ran ahead to greet her.

"Baby you be a good boy for daddy ok mommy has to go away for a little while" he tussled his hair and gave him a kiss on the cheek. She did the same thing with Faith and got into her car and drove off without another word.

"Mama gone" was all Phinnigan would say before he burst into tears.

A/N: Wow that was amazingly hard chapter to get out. I have this whole story planned out in my head and sometimes it's hard to write between the main events that I want to happen. Like this chapter I had no idea what I wanted to happen but I knew I wanted to involve Marc and have John kick her out. Now before you guys find out where I live and come to my house with pitchforks and torches in hand I swear a reconciliation is in the works. She just needs a little "fatherly advice" before she can admit to the obvious that she wants him as much as he wants her. I would also like to point out that the major inspiration for the chapter and the name of the title came from Marc's song Something to Say, off of his Inferiority Complex album, which I have concluded is about his relationship with John. Also the song rocks if you haven't heard it I suggest you do cause the whole album kicks ass.


	41. Chapter 41

Ashley sat on the back steps of her father's porch watching the rain fall down creating thick copper colored mud with the red Georgia dirt. She wrapped her arms around her body a little tighter to stop from shivering. The grey terrycloth sweatshirt she was wearing did nothing to help her. But it was more than the cold that plagued her. She missed her kids and she missed John. Hell she even kinda missed Randy too. She sighed and swiped away the few tears she had left to cry.

"It's awful cold out here kiddo you might catch pneumonia" Chris warned her as he handed her a cup of hot coffee.

"Doesn't matter anymore" she said sadly.

"Come on everything can't be that bad" until then Ashley had not told him what had happened to cause her to be staying with him.

"You don't even wanna know" she replied.

"Tell me" he urged her having a seat next to her.

She sighed for a moment "Well I slept with Marc and John caught us and got so angry that he kicked me out"

"You slept with Marc as in John's cousin Marc?" he asked.

"Uh huh"

"Ouch! Why would you do that?" he asked in an almost berating tone.

"Because I felt like John was ignoring me so I guess subconsciously I just wanted to feel like someone was listening to me and that someone cared"

"You want to know what I thought the first time I met John?" he asked.

"This guy has a blonde Mohawk what is she thinking" she retorted.

"No" he laughed "I though this is the man my daughter was going to spend the rest of her life with"

"How could you possibly know that?" she asked amazed.

"I think it's time I told you a story"

"Oh God dad if this story starts with when I was a kid we had to walk 3 miles to school in the snow with holes in our shoes I don't even want to hear it"

"Or you could shut you mouth and listen to my advice"

When she didn't open her mouth again that let him know that she wanted to listen to him. She gave her a weak smile.

"When you were a little girl you had this imaginary best friend and you two would do everything together. You even made your mother set an extra plate at the table every time we ate meals. But one day and I will remember this day until the day I die. I had just come home from being on the road and you were sitting on the front porch of our other house very much like you are now"

_ Flashback _

"_Honey what's wrong?" he asked his five year old daughter._

_She sniffled a little but didn't answer him right away. He had a seat next to her and gave her a hug._

"_Why do people leave?" she finally asked._

"_What do you mean sweetie?" Chris remarked confused by her question._

"_My best friend left today and he isn't coming back … he told me that I didn't need him anymore and that there were other children out there who needed him more than I did"_

"_Oh" was all he could say. This was his five year old daughter talking about her imaginary friend but the way she was talking was way too mature for someone her age. It kinda scared him._

"_As people get older they learn that they don't need their imaginary friends anymore and they disappear"_

"_But I still do need him daddy"_

"_Well if that's the case then maybe you'll see him again"_

_ End _

"I don't remember any of that" she said.

"Yeah I put it to the back of my mind too until you brought Cena home"

"I still have no idea what that story has to do with anything" she said.

"Your imaginary friend's name was Johnny" he told her "don't you see Ashley there was a reason that John was brought back into your life … maybe Johnny knew you needed him again so he came back but this time he was a real guy"

"Have you been drinking?" she asked looking at his eyes to see if he had in fact been drinking.

"No I haven't and I'm trying to be serious with you"

"Dad you have to admit that the whole me having an imaginary friend named Johnny and the whole me and John thing is nothing more than a weird coincidence" she rationally.

"Has anyone ever told you sometimes you have to have faith"

"Believe me I have faith in fact I have so much faith that I named my daughter Faith remember"

"Actually that would be John who named her Faith"

"Whatever"

"Just think about what I just told you and if you can still come up with legitimate reasons why you and John shouldn't be together that don't involve some paranoid fear that you seem to have then maybe you two shouldn't be together"

"Thanks daddy" she said giving him a hug "you always know the right things to say to put all us kids at ease"

"Now there is something that I have to talk to you about" he said.

"What is it … oh my God is something wrong … you aren't sick are you"

"No I'm fine" he assured her.

"Is it Lilian … Keegan … Connor … it's Becky's baby isn't it"

"Calm down nothing is wrong we are all just fine no one is sick or dying or anything like that" he said putting both hands on each one of her shoulders to calm her.

"Then what's up?" she asked curiously.

"Lilian wants kids" he frowned.

"And?" she asked.

"Well all my kids are grown and I'm a grandfather don't you think I'm a little too old to be at this whole parenting thing again"

"I don't think age really has anything to do with anything dad it's all up to if you have the desire to be someone's parent. Anyone can go out and get pregnant or get someone pregnant but it takes real stand up people to actually be parents. There are millions of kids already in this world who need people like you and Lilian" she pointed out "but like I said it's your decision and if you don't want to then I think Lilian would understand"

"Have I told you lately that I'm proud of you"

"You are proud of me huh … did you miss the whole I slept with Marc conversation?" she asked.

"Well that I'm not too proud of but everything else you do I am proud of. Not many people would move back in with John just because his father had a heart attack and he needed help caring for him. Some people would have just let Phinnigan stay in that orphanage or not taken in Faith. You could still be drinking"

"I just can't see people in need and not help them" she said.

"That is an admirable quality"

"Why does life have to be so screwed up right now?" Ashley asked starting to get teary-eyed.

He wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer to him. She rested her head on his shoulder. He kissed the top of her head.

"I love you daddy"

"I love you too baby and things will get better you just need let everyone heal" he advised her.

"I will" she wiped her eyes.

"John is a good guy and he'll come around"

"I hope so … I really hope so"

A/N: Another update done. I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter.


	42. Chapter 42

"Ash please I'm begging you I need to know how to get Faith to sleep because she is one pissed off infant and I need my sleep" Randy pathetically begged his best friend over the phone.

"She's not sleeping?" Ashley asked concerned.

"Well do you blame her first her mother disappears then she's dragged away from everything she knows to travel around with her grouch of a father and equally miserable toddler brother"

"How's my little man?" she asked.

"He's been throwing fits like crazy, he wants you to come home"

"What have you guys been telling him" she tried to hide the pain in her voice.

Randy noticed it right away "We keep telling him that mommy needed to help grandpa with something and that you'll be home soon"

"Randy you shouldn't lie to him" she sighed twirling the phone cord around her fingers.

"It's not a lie if I have to add on to this house just so you and John don't have to see each other but are still living in the same house so I don't have to listen to all these whiny kids I'll do it"

"I miss my babies like crazy but tell them that I'll be at Raw next Monday and I can't wait to see them oh and Randy please give them a million kisses for me and tell them that I'm thinking about them and that I love them"

"I will I promise"

"Also tell Dommy I miss her too and I'll call her soon "

"Yep"

"Oh and tell Dean I love him too and that I miss him and give him just as many kisses as you are giving my kids cause I don't want him to feel left out"

"Anything else?" he asked.

"No that's it and just know that I'm safe and taking the time to do some soul searching"

"Ok … is there anything you want me to tell John?"

"No"

"Hey Randy I gotta go but remember what I asked you to do and that I love you"

"I love you too but seriously before you go please tell me how to get Faith to sleep"

"It's actually really simple just sing her a Keith Urban song" she replied.

"Huh??"

"I'm not sure but I think Alex might have listened to Keith Urban a lot while she was pregnant with Faith because I remember one time Faith was fussing like crazy and my cell phone rang my ringtone of course at that time was I Told You So by Keith Urban and let me tell you she stopped crying immediately"

"Really? Good to know but why do I have to sing it to her why not just play a song on the radio"

"Because she likes when the people she loves take the time to rock her and sing to her. It makes her feel safe and secure"

"And that is why I will never be any good at raising daughters they are just too much work"

"You say that now but the moment that little girl is placed in your arms everything else just melts away believe me ask John he'll tell you all about it"

"Well we'll see"

"I really do have to go now"

"Ok so I guess I'll see you on Monday"

"It's a date"

"Take care of yourself"

"I always do"

"Bye Ash"

"Bye Rans"


	43. Chapter 43

_Chapter 43: It's Complicated_

Monday had arrived and Ashley couldn't wait to see her kids. She had dragged Stephanie to the show with her. Ashley paced the room anxiously.

"You know you can relax" Steph said she while her youngest daughter 1 year old Murphy sat on her lap.

"Yeah I could relax but I don't think I can"

"Mommy I want to play with Phinnigan when is he getting here?" 3 year old Aurora asked.

As if on cue Phinnigan bounded into the room and made a b line straight for his mother. She stopped pacing and scooped the little boy into her arms and hugged him tightly.

"I missed my little man" she said to him.

"Mama leave"

"But mama is here now baby" she said rubbing his back.

"No leave again" he said nuzzling his face into the crook of her neck.

She had a feeling he wasn't going to let her go anytime soon so she had a seat on a near by chair and motioned for Randy, who until then had been standing near the door with Faith in his arms to come closer. She took the baby in her arms too and there she sat with her two children in her arms.

"Phinny come play with me" Aurora whined.

"No" he protested.

"It's ok sweetie mommy's not going anywhere I promise"

He removed his little arms from around his mother's neck and hopped off her lap to go play with his friend. They moved to the far end of the room where Aurora had her toys set up. Every once in a while Phinnigan would look up to see if his mother was still there.

"You know he's gonna freak out when you leave" Randy whispered to her.

"There is nothing I can do about it Rans John kicked me out" she frowned.

Randy smiled and tickled Faith's tummy. This was the first time he had seen her quiet in almost 2 weeks. She kicked her legs around while happily babbling to herself.

"You telling everyone a story?" he asked her.

She looked at him for a moment as if trying to decide if she wanted to answer him or not. Then she let out a high pitched squeal and started blowing bubbles.

"Babies are so gross" he grimaced.

"So if Dommy told you she wanted kids you'd say no" Randy's face reddened at the mention of Ashley's cousin.

"I have no idea what you are talking about"

"Come on Randy your face is completely red so I know you like her why not ask her out already"

"Why do you care?" he asked.

"Because I want to see you settle down with a nice girl … Dean needs a mother in his life and Dommy is the best"

"I'm just not ready to rush into anything right now I'm still trying to get over the whole Courtney fiasco"

"If it helps I don't think Dommy would break your heart like that and from what I've seen Dean seems to really like her"

"End of conversation" he told her.

"Come on Randy I know you like her"

Stephanie watched the two friends bicker with each other and it reminded her of her brother Shane and herself while they were in their teenage years.

"Just admit you like her and that will be the end of it" she said.

"Fine I like her ok … I like her a lot"

"I knew it!" Ashley exclaimed.

All the kids in the room stared at Ashley in wonder. They weren't used to the adults raising their voices so of course they were all curious. After a while Phinnigan got tired of playing with Aurora. Faith had since fallen asleep so Ashley had put her in her stroller and was moving it back and forth from her seat. Phinnigan climbed into her lap and she used her free hand to run her fingers through his hair. He wrapped his little arms around her neck again and rested his head on her shoulder. Soon his soft snores could be heard.

"Poor thing probably hasn't had a proper nights sleep since I left" she sighed.

"There has to be some sort of way to sort this out because these kids don't need anymore drama in their lives" Randy said.

'I don't know what you want me to tell you Randy I mean I could take them with me but that isn't going to solve anything because they will be leaving their home and everything they know once again"

"Why not just work around John's schedule … he works Thursday through Monday stay with the kids till Tuesday morning and the John gets to spend time with them and then when he leaves then you come back" Steph suggested.

"That sounds way too complicated" Ashley remarked.

"It may be complicated but it's better than what you have going on now"

"It could work" Randy agreed.

"John is not going to go for it" Ashley said.

--

"What do you mean he went for it?" Ashley asked stunned when she and Randy were having dinner with the kids later that evening.

"He wants what is best for the kids" Randy said taking a bite of salad.

"But I still don't think he's thought this whole thing through"

Randy's cell phone went off and he reached into his pocket to get it. He flipped his phone open and got this goofy grin on his face. Ashley assumed he was reading a text message. He sent whoever had sent him the text one back before retuning to his meal.

"Who was the text from"

"None of your business"

"It's Dommy isn't it" she teased him.

"No"

"Yes it is … Randy loves Dommy … Randy loves Dommy" she sang.

"What are you 5?" he asked.

"You betcha"

"I am not confirming or denying if the text was from Dommy"

"You and I both know it was" she retorted. "just ask her out already"

"Leave me alone"

"Not until you take my advice and ask my cousin out" she said.

"How about you stop trying to control my love life and start getting yours on track"

"That hurt Randal it really did" she held her chest where her heart was.

"Truth hurts" he excused himself.

When he was out of her hearing range he pulled out his cell phone again and dialed John's home number.

"Hey Dommy it's me … how would you like to have dinner with me and then maybe a movie?"


	44. Chapter 44

_Chapter 44: The Choices We Make_

"And as all his friends surrounded him dressed in costumes to make them looks like tiggers too Tigger finally realized that he wasn't alone and he didn't have to go looking for his family because they had been with him the whole time. The end" Ashley closed the book she had been reading to Phinnigan and Faith.

"Read again mommy" Phinnigan urged her.

"Sorry bud but you need to go to sleep" she kissed the top of his head.

"Stay wif you" he snuggled closer to his mom and wrapped his little arm around her. Faith moved her head so she could look up at her mother while her head still rested against the crook of her mother's arm. She gurgled happily while kicking her legs.

"You guys can stay here with me till Dommy gets home but then its bedtime," she told them but it was more for Phinnigan than for Faith.

Phinnigan began to tiredly play with his fingers giggling at nothing. That was what he did when he was tired. Ashley ran her fingers through his hair and it wasn't long before he fell asleep. She could feel soft warm breaths against her neck as his chest slowly rose and fell in a relaxed rhythm.

"You know Faith I kinda wish you were as easy to get to sleep as your brother," she cooed at the infant. She picked up one of Faith's terrycloth animal toys shaped like an elephant and waved it in front of the infant. Faith's eyes went wide in wonder as she watched the toy dance in front of her. Her sand colored hair swept into her eyes. She let out of frustrated howl as she tried to swipe it away but all she managed to do was knock her binky out of her mouth.

Ashley laughed as she picked up the binky and placed it near her daughter's mouth. Faith accepted it back greatfully. Faith's eyes were beginning to change, they were really blue after birth but as she got older they seemed to be changing towards brown. Like her brother she had been blessed with olive colored skin and she probably wouldn't have any trouble getting a tan when she got older.

"What do you say you close your eyes little princess" she whispered.

But Faith seemed in no hurry to fall asleep. Ashley looked at the digital clock on the far wall. Dommy should have been home from work by now. John would be getting home in a couple of hours and she needed to be gone before he did. She knew she should call her cousin to make sure she was ok but both her children were laying on her and she knew that it would be near impossible to get them to sleep if she woke them up. Faith had just started closing her eyes. She opened them as soon as she closed them though. She was struggling to stay awake. Ashley carefully moved Phinnigan so he could lay down on the couch with her children. Phinnigan stirred and Ashley feared that he would open his eyes , but he didn't. Instead he covered his face with his arm. She waited a few minutes before fixing his position so he would be more comfortable. Faith had a fallen asleep by then. Both kids were sleeping on her chest. Boredom was getting to her. She decided to close her eyes too. She didn't want to fall asleep or anything like that, she just wanted to rest her eyes. Before she knew it she was asleep.

John sighed as he entered his home. It was a little after two in the morning and all he wanted to do was go to sleep in his own bed and sleep for the next year. The first thing he noticed was that someone had left the living room light on. He really didn't think too much of it. Opting to go and shut the lights off before heading to bed. When he first entered the room he was surprised to see Faith and Phinnigan asleep on the couch. But as he got closer he could see that they were both cuddled up to their mother. All three sound asleep. He picked Faith up first and carried her into her room. After tucking her into bed he went back and did the same thing to Phinnigan. Finally he returned to the living room and kneeled down close to Ashley. He thought about waking her up and asking her to leave but in all honesty he didn't want her to leave. It was quite the opposite, if anything he wanted her to stay. Knowing he was going to regret this later he picked her up also and began to carry her but instead of putting her in her own room he continued going down the hall and stopped at his own door. If they were never going to be together ever again all he asked is for one more night sleeping together with her in his arms. He kicked the door shut with his foot not having any idea where to go next.

A/N: Sorry guys for the long period of time where I haven't updated I've been kinda busy which isn't a good enough excuse I know but it's the truth. For those of you who haven't check out my new story _A Not So Cinderella Story_ ... you should. Also to all my fanfic friends who have a little bit of time on their hands. I'm asking anyone and everyone who will listen, I'm looking for someone to write me a one shot song fic based on the song Home by Blake Shelton. I love that song and would really love an OS. But it's cool if people are busy or don't want to. I just thought I'd put the option out.


	45. Chapter 45

_Chapter 45: __Can't Start A Fire Woryin' Bout Your Little World Fallin' Apart_

A smile was painted across her face as she stretched . She had had the most amazing dream ever. She had dreamed that she had spent the night in John's arms. Still smiling she opened her eyes but all at once the smile left her face. She wasn't in her bedroom at her condo … she wasn't even in her bedroom at John's house, no she was in John's bedroom … in John's bed no less. So it wasn't a dream she really had spent the night in John's arms. But why had she spent the night in John's arms? She had no idea, her head swam with confusion.

"How did I get here?" she asked herself. The last thing she remembered was falling asleep with Phin and Faith on the couch.

She then checked to make sure she was still dressed. Her eyebrow cocked a little bit you never quite knew with John. She sighed when she realized that she was still fully dressed in what she had fell asleep in the night before. She felt bad thinking about John in that light she knew that he was a good man and would never do anything to harm her in any way shape or form. She reluctantly turned over and was almost a little disappointed that John was not there. She rested her head against his pillow and she could smell his scent. She rested there for a moment taking in the familiar scent of John. She got herself out of bed and left the room. She entered the kitchen quietly and was disappointed yet again that John was not there. Dommy strolled out of her bedroom with a grin similar to Ashley's earlier one.

"Where the hell where you last night?" Ashley asked with her hands on her hips.

Dommy stopped and got this deer caught in headlights look on her face. She had forgotten that she had to watch the kids so Ashley could leave. But then it hit her that Ashley had to have spent the night and she didn't see her on the couch when she got in this morning.

"The better question is where did you sleep last night?" Domonique raised an eyebrow at her older cousin before beginning to smirk.

"Don't change the subject … you were supposed to watch the kids for a few hours like you do every other week so you'd better have a good excuse and I swear on the lives of my children if I hear the name Randy come out of your mouth I will beat you down"

"Sorry" was all Domonique managed to say.

Ashley rolled her eyes before grabbing her purse and leaving. Randy emerged from his room shirtless and confused. Domonique eyed him wildly seeing as he was only wearing a pair of dark blue plaid boxers.

"What was that banging noise?" he asked stretching.

"Boy will you go put some clothes on" Fabo scolded the younger man walking past him heading straight for the coffee pot. "You standing there half naked is not what I wanted to see first thing in the morning before I have even had my coffee"

"Have either of you talked to John this morning because Ashley just left and she didn't look happy"

"Wait … Ashley spent the night" Randy asked looking at Fabo.

"Why the hell are you looking at me I was out all last night dumbass" Fabo remarked.

"Oh Fabo did you have a hot date?" Dommy teased.

"A gentleman never kisses and tells my dear" he said taking his coffee into the dining room.

"Eww" Randy cringed.

"I think it's cute" Dommy said "he's just an older guy looking for someone to love"

"You my dear are a hopeless romantic" he kissed the bridge of her nose.

"Somehow I don't think you were calling me that last night" she licked her lips seductively at the third generation superstar.

"No I believe you were a naughty girl last night" he lowered his lips to taste hers.

"Eww" a little voice from behind them said.

Randy and Dommy turned around to see Dean and Phinnigan standing in the door way. Dean had Faith in his arms. All three children were staring at the two adults. Faith just laughed at the two of them while the boys wore identical looks of disgust.

"Foiled by the kids" Randy whispered in her ear "oh well there is always later"

Meanwhile with John

"Thanks for meeting me" he greeted the man with a smile and a handshake. They both had a seat at an umbrella covered table.

"Are you sure about this?" the man asked.

"I've never been more sure about anything in my life" John stated with a determined nod of the head.

"I wish you luck then son" the blue eyed man slid a black velvet box across the table to the younger man "may it bring you as much happiness as it brought me and it's previous wearer.

"Tomorrow is going to be the best night of my life" John grinned before taking a sip of his coffee.


	46. Chapter 46

Giddy excitement ran through his veins as he practically skipped into his home. Phinnigan raced to greet him.

"Daddy" Phinney launched himself into his father's arms.

This was nothing new to John who returned the gesture of affection with a hug and a kiss. Phinnigan rested his head against his father's shoulder and popped his thumb into his mouth. Phinnigan unlike Faith didn't seem to have a parental preference, he liked anyone who would hold him.

"Were you a good boy while I was gone?" John asked the toddler.

"Uh huh" was his reply.

"Where's Grandpa?" John asked.

"Him and Fafe in da living room" was what John could make out because Phinnigan still had his thumb in his mouth.

"You know you gotta stop sucking your thumb buddy you are a big boy now"

"Phinney no big boy … Phinney is baby"

'You are a baby huh well ok but babies don't get to go to the racecar track with their daddies" John told him "and I was really looking forward to taking my big boy son but if you are a baby then we can't"

"Oh well maybe I'll ask Dean to go with me instead"

"No daddy! Phinney a big boy" Phinnigan protested.

"Are you sure?" John asked pretending to be unsure.

"Yes" the toddler agreed.

"Ok well then if you say you are a big boy then I guess I have to believe you"

He put the boy to his feet and watched as he ran off. A smile plastered over his face. Now he had to put phase two of his plan into action and for that he was going to need Randy and Dommy's help. He had forgotten to ask Phinnigan where Randy and Dommy were. He decided to start with the logical places to look which would obviously be their bedrooms.

"Dude I need your … UGH OH MY GOD" as fast as he entered the room he left it.

"I need to stop doing that" John scolded himself. He closed his eyes and held them shut for a minute or so before opening them and blinking multiple times.

A scowling Randy walked out of his room looking like he could kill someone. His blazing blue orbs focused on John as he cracked his knuckles.

"You ever hear of knocking" the younger man yelled.

"Dude it's not even noon yet and you are already in the bed" John rolled his eyes.

"Like you have never done it" the Legend Killer retorted "now what the fuck do you want"

"Well for starters the images of you and Dommy doin the nasty out of my head would be wonderful" he blinked a few more times once again trying to clear his head.

"Once again learn to knock"

"I met with him this morning" John said looking around suspiciously.

"And?" Randy asked a little less irritated and a lot more interested.

John pulled the box out of his pocket. Randy whistled as he stared at it's contents. Rocking back and forth on his heels he gave John a serious look. John returned his gaze with a look of his own.

"I'm surprised he agreed" Randy said.

"I can be very convincing when I want to be" John replied.

"So what do you need me to do"

John got closer to the Legend Killer and whispered the plan to him. Randy's blue eyes shone with excitement and hope for what he thought would happen.

"You can count on us"

"Thanks man" John clapped his friend on the back.

A/N: Who is the mystery blue eyed man ... what is in the box that he gave John. What is the Plan? Stay Tuned and find out.


	47. Chapter 47

A/N: I know the whole lyrics in chapters thing is a big no no but for once could we just look the other way. I would be eternally thankful. I do not own the lyrics they belong to the band Lifehouse

_Chapter 47: When You Look Me In The Eyes_

Her mother once told her that the people you love the most are also the ones you get the maddest at. She said that there was a thin line between love and hate. Something, which Ashley seemed to be learning all too well lately. She sighed as she sat in the kitchen feeding Faith. She read the writing on Faith's bib it read _Cute and messy just like Daddy. _She couldn't help but smile at the message because it was so true.

"Come on Ash you have to go out with me and Randy tonight to celebrate my birthday" Dommy was almost whining by now. She had been trying for the last 20 minutes to convince her hardheaded cousin to come out and have fun.

"Who the hell is gonna watch the kids?" Ashley asked.

"Fabo said he would do it"

"Yeah well who the hell is gonna watch Fabo?" the older woman got up from her seat and placed Faith's dishes in the dishwasher.

"Come on please Ash it would mean a lot to me if you were there"

Ashley rolled her eyes "Fine".

Although she was no where near in the mood to go partying with her younger cousin and her boyfriend she knew that it would mean a lot to Dommy if she did go. She had been in a funk for the last few days; she contributed it with guilty feelings she felt towards John. He had been nothing but supportive and patient with her and she had to go and screw it up. Technically she had never cheated on him but that didn't stop her from feeling like she did.

"So you see Faith Bruce Springsteen is the greatest musician of all time" Ashley explained to the baby later on that afternoon. They were lying on Ashley's bed and Ashley had been reading The Gospel according to Bruce Springsteen: Rock and Redemption, from Asbury Park to Magic to the little girl."yes he is," she said in a baby voice while tickling the infant's tummy. Faith looked up at her and then did something very unexpected, the baby who had been previously lying on her back rolled over onto her stomach for the first time. Ashley's face lit up as she sat up and took the infant into her arms. She kissed her cheeks and the baby cooed.

"No baby you can't grow up like your brother you have to stay little forever" Faith placed her little hands on either side of her mother's face. She took one of the baby's tiny hands into her own and kissed it.

"I love you my little princess and no matter what happens between your daddy and me I will always love you and your brother" Faith rested her forehead against her mother's as if to say I love you too.

Phinnigan walked into the room. He wore a casual smile on his face. He walked over to the side of the bed and scampered up. He decided to crawl over to his mom and make himself comfortable next to his little sister.

"What do I owe the pleasure of having both my children with me?" she asked him.

"Missed you" was Phinnigan's reply.

"Well I missed you too sweetie" she kissed the top of his head.

"What do you say all 3 of us take a nap and then mommy will get ready to go out tonight with Uncle Randy and Auntie Dommy" Phinnigan frowned when his mother mentioned that she was going to be going out that night. He didn't like when his mommy wasn't with him and his sister.

Ashley woke up later that evening feeling horrible. Her head pounded she felt queasy and she swore she was going to throw up at any second. She got up carefully as not to wake up the children. Somehow Phinnigan and Faith ended up cuddling together in their sleep. Her head was swimming and she barely made it into the bathroom before she felt the need to throw up. She paid homage to the porcelain gods. When she finally felt well enough she turned on the shower and disrobed. She felt a little better letting the warm water wash over her. After getting out of the shower she towel dried herself off and wrapped her wet hair up in another soft towel. She slipped into her terrycloth robe. Walking into the closet she frowned trying to decide what to wear. She chose a chocolate colored dress that came down to her mid thigh There was a low plunging v -neck plunge giving one a glimpse of her ample breasts. She took the wrap from around her hair as she stood in her black lace Victoria Secret bra and boy shorts looking at her reflection in the mirror trying to decide how to wear her hair. After twenty minutes of debating she decided to leave her long mahogany colored tresses down and she would curl it. There was a knock on the bathroom door and before she could answer it Dommy walked in.

"Good think I was wearing underwear" Ashley grumbled.

"Please you don't have anything that I don't have" Domonique crossed her arms over her chest "except for that new lower back tattoo … girl turn around so I can get a better look"

Ashley turned around and sure enough she was sporting a new tattoo. It was of a red heart with three antique looking swords running through it. Domonique looked over the new ink with an approving eye.

"Very nice" she said.

"Was there something you wanted or did you just want to catch me in a semi state of undress?" Ashley asked.

"Do I look like I've gained weight to you?" Dommy asked staring at her refection in the mirror.

"No …"

"Are you sure?"

"Not that I can see" the older woman gave her younger cousin a look.

"I'm kinda a little bit late"

It took Ashley a few minutes to realize what her cousin meant but as soon as she did her eyes became as wide as silver dollars. Domonique waited for her cousin to explode but she never did she just sat a seat on the toilet and sighed.

"I want to buy a test but I'm too nervous so will you buy me one?" she begged her older cousin.

"Fine" Ashley relented too tired to argue.

"Great!" Domonique exclaimed feeling instantly better "now hurry up and get dressed because we are leaving soon and all Randy would tell me is to dress nice"

"So you have no idea what we're doing either?" Ashley questioned her cousin.

"Nope, Randy is being very secretive" the younger woman lied.

"Well ok then that makes me feel a little better" Ashley admitted.

She dressed and styled her hair as quickly as she could. She was just putting the finishing touches on her makeup when Randy came into the room and told her that they were leaving. He took in the sight of his best friend standing there putting on eyeliner. His heart swelled a little knowing what was to come later.

"You look beautiful Ash" he told her honestly.

"Thanks Rans" she kissed his cheek.

"You ready my dear" she offered her his arm.

She laughed taking intertwining her arm with his much larger one. Dommy, Fabo and the two boys were waiting for them in the living room.

"Cousin are you trying to steal my man?" Dommy kidded.

"Nope, he's all yours my man is the one wearing footie pajamas" she grinned picking up the toddler.

"Are you gonna be good for grandpa?" she asked him.

"Yes"

"Ok I love you"

"Luff you too"

She kissed his cheek before handing him off to his grandfather. She gave Dean a kiss also and told him she loved him as well. Then she thanked Fabo for watching the kids.

"Anything for you love" he replied with a knowing smile.

They piled into the car and before they could arrive from their destination Ashley asked Randy to stop off at a nearby Rite Aide.

"Why are we stopping?" Randy asked while parking.

"Faith needs diapers" Ashley came up with a lie of her own.

She walked into the store and made a b-line straight for the pregnancy test isle. She stood there for a moment looking over the packages. She was so confused by all the different labels. Finally deciding to just screw it she grabbed two boxes of the EPT brand. She wasn't sure if these ones were all that reliable because she really didn't know all that much about pregnancy tests seeing as she never had to take one before. She felt like everyone was staring at her as she walked through the store with two pregnancy tests in her hand. She picked up one of those little carry around baskets and grabbed a few more things throwing them on top of the pregnancy tests. When she finally got to the cashier she seemed to take forever to ring everything up. Stopping for a moment to look at the pregnancy tests. She smiled at Ashley before ringing them up.

"That will be 47.89" the cashier told her.

Ashley handed the older woman a fifty and told her to keep the change. She grabbed her bags stopping by the door to grab a medium sized white paper bag she stuck the two pregnancy tests into the bag and then stuck that bag into her purse. She walked back to the car and got into the backseat.

"Took ya long enough" Randy complained.

"Sorry but Faith has been getting a lot of diaper rash so I wanted to make sure I got the right kind of diapers" she defended herself.

"Yeah whatever"

They arrived at a small club about fifteen minutes later. Ashley got out of the car and smoothed down the front of her dress. She had never seen or heard of this little hole in the wall before.

"Rans what are we doing here?" Ashley questioned "I thought we were going to celebrate"

"All part of the surprise" he said handing both Dommy and Ashley blindfolds.

"Why do I need one" Ashley protested.

"Just put it on" Randy sighed.

Ashley looked a Dommy who simply gave her a nod. She placed the blindfold across her eyes and allowed Randy to tie it. Randy grinned over at Dommy who had gotten rid of her blindfold.

"Randy how are you going to guide both me and Dommy?" Ashley asked.

"Never you worry just start moving" Randy gave her a small push.

Randy carefully lead Ashley inside while Dommy made sure she kept close to her cousin to keep the allusion that Randy was pushing them both. Randy helped Ashley into her seat and looked around the room. John had really outdid himself this time. Apparently his friendship with Conan O'Brien had paid off because Max had been able to get John 3 hard to get tickets for a special performance that Bruce Springsteen was taping for VH1 Storytellers program. Randy removed the blindfold and it took Ashley a moment to get used to the dim lighting.

"What's going on?" she asked a little disoriented.

"you'll see" Randy grinned at her.

Ashley's blue-gray eyes took in the dimly lit room. At first notice she didn't seem to catch the televisions cameras. But upon a second inspection she noticed them.

"Randy why are there television cameras here?" she asked him intrigued.

"Ladies and gentlemen if everyone will find their seats the performance will begin" a voice carried over a loud speaker.

The room filled up quickly as everyone shuffled to find their seats. Ashley's curiosity was in overdrive she had no idea what was going on or who they were planning to go see. If her senses had been in more proper working order she would have noticed her father, Lilian, Connor, Keegan, and Becky at one table. Or over to the other side of the room Stephanie, Paul, Shane and Marissa sat quietly together. The lights went black and smaller ones highlighting a stage turned on. Ashley's heart began to race as she saw who came out onto the stage. Her mouth went dry and she felt like she was going to pass out.

"How's everyone doing tonight" the deep guttural voice of Bruce Springsteen floated through the room.

Ashley took a few deep breaths and gripped the table hard trying to wrap her mind around the fact that her idol was before her.

"I want to thank everyone who came out here for this taping it's nice to know that I still have some fans" Bruce quipped with a wide smile. "unfortunately you only get me tonight. But I'm going to play you a few songs and tell you what they mean to me"

Randy looked over to Ashley and she looked like a little kid staring at the Christmas tree with all the presents under the tree on Christmas morning. He smiled and patted her hand. If Ashley had been in her right mind she would have realized that Dommy didn't really care for Springsteen so there was no way Randy would have set this up for her but her mind was completely blank at the moment. Bruce began by playing an acoustic version of _My Hometown_. Ashley mouthed the words along with her idol. She rested her head against Dommy's shoulder and the younger woman kissed the top of her cousin's head. She was happy to see Ashley so happy and they hadn't even gotten to the best part yet. Bruce finished the song and waited for the crowd to stop applauding.

"That song is one of my favorites because to me it symbolizes what it was like growing up as a kid in New Jersey back when times were simple and you could let your kids play in your front yard without having to worry about them getting kidnapped or shot in a drive by"

He also played _Devils and Dust, You're Missing, Long Walk Home, Secret Garden, and Brilliant Disguise. _After he played _Brilliant Disguise _he paused and looked over towards Ashley's direction.

"Folks we have a surprise performer tonight … now he's never done this before but he has a message to send out to someone very special" Bruce moved from the stood he had been sitting in to one towards the side of the stage.

This was his queue there was no turning back now. John walked out onto the semi brightly lit stage. His heart began racing as he took in the crowd. An acoustic guitar in his hands. He could do this, he had to do this. He had come too far to turn back now. He smiled to the crowd whispered a few words of thanks to Bruce who wished him good luck. He had a seat on the stool Bruce had just vacated and closed his eyes for a moment.

"This song is something I wrote for the mother of my two children" he explained loosing the collar of the navy blue dress shirt he was wearing "bare with the though I'm no Bruce Springsteen" at that Bruce let out a chuckle.

_A strangled smile fell from your face  
It kills me that I hurt you this way  
The worst part is that I didn't even know  
Now there's a million reasons for you to go  
But if you can find a reason to stay _

His eyes met hers and they held a stare. His hand strummed on the guitar in a haunting melody. It was only him and her in the room now. It killed him that they had hurt each other so much and now she felt like they could never be together.

I'll do whatever it takes  
To turn this around  
I know what's at stake  
_I know that I've let you down  
And if you give me a chance  
Believe that I can change  
I'll keep us together whatever it takes _

Every word he sang he meant. If after all this is over and she took him back he would spend the rest of his life letting her know how much he loved her. He would never let her go again. And if she said no … well he wasn't even going to think about that right now.

_She said "If we're gonna make this work  
You gotta let me inside even though it hurts  
Don't hide the broken parts that I need to see"  
She said "Like it or not it's the way it's gotta be  
You gotta love yourself if you can ever love me" _

His mind flashed back to a time when he and Ashley had first started dating. He had only broken up with his ex-fiancée Liz 3 months prior to beginning to date Ashley. He didn't meant to be but he would come off cold and distant to Ashley sometimes.

"If we're gonna make this work" she said looking him deep in the eyes " you have to let me inside even though it hurts. Don't hide the broken parts that I need to see because I can't help you mend them. You make not like it but that's how it has to be because you gotta love yourself if you can ever think of loving me"

He knew she was right he wasn't being fair to her by still hanging onto the hope that their could be a reconciliation between him and Liz. He grabbed her hand and squeezed it letting her know that he had gotten her message. He loved that even though she knew he was still in love with another woman at that time she was so gentle and patient with him. If he knew nothing else he knew right then that he needed her in his life. Although he wasn't sure what part she would serve just yet he knew he needed her.

_But remember the time I told you the way that I felt  
That I'd be lost without you and never find myself  
Let's hold onto each other above everything else  
Start over, start over _

It was almost over, he had one more verse go to and he was all done. He could see he had tears in her eyes and he wasn't afraid to admit that there were a few tears in his eyes as well.

_I'll do whatever it takes  
To turn this around  
I know what's at stake  
I know I've let you down  
And if you give me a chance  
and believe that I can change  
I'll keep us together whatever it takes_

He finished playing his song and without a seconds hesitation he hopped off the stage and walked over to the woman he loved. His eyes were bright and hopeful and all eyes were on them now.

"I guess what I'm trying to say" he got down on one knee and pulled the black velvet box out of his pants pocket. He opened the box up to reveal an 18k emerald ring with a white gold band in between the shimmering emerald sat two small diamonds one on either side. It wasn't what someone would call a flashy ring by any stretch of the imagination but for a poor man, whom had been the first purchaser of that very ring barely making anything to live off of it was a big deal. Ashley had tears in her eyes, the ring John was now proposing with that been the same ring he father had proposed to her mother with. "will you marry me"

Overcome by emotions she could no longer talk all she could do was shake her head yes. John stood up and pulled her up with him into a tight embrace before he kissed her with all the passion he had built up for so long. This was definitely the best day of his life. Everyone was cheering and applauding for them now even Bruce.

"The groom to be asked me to play this song if his new fiancée said yes" Bruce picked up his guitar again and began playing _These are the Days _which was originally sung by Van Morrison. It was one of Ashley's most favorite songs. John asked her to dance and as she rested her head on his shoulder she felt contentment and peace for the first time in a long while.

"Nothing is ever going to tear us apart again I promise" he whispered in her ear.

"I know baby I know"

After everything was said and done and things had started to calm down Dommy pulled her into the restroom.

"Here" Ashley murmured handing her cousin the medium sized white bag. "I bought two of them because I don't really know about these things"

"Sweetie they come two in a package" Domonique laughed with shaking hands she removed one of the EPTs from the bag.

"I'm nervous ... will you take one with me?" she asked hopefully.

"Me ... why? We both know what the results of mine will say a big fat negative"

"Please it'll make me feel better" she begged.

"Fine" Ashley sighed snatching a test from her cousin before entering a nearby bathroom stall.

Both women walked out of the stalls simultaneously. Domonique was unusually pale. Ashley felt sympathy for her but then again she didn't exactly know how her cousin felt because she herself had never and would never be in that situation.

"You sure you took it right?" Domonique asked just to make conversation.

"All you do is pee on a stick it's not rocket science" the newly engaged woman replied.

"Now we wait"

Ashley hopped up on the marble counter top in between the two white porcelain sinks.

"So you and John are engaged now" Dommy grinned.

"I know isn't it amazing" Ashley took a moment to show off her ring. She couldn't help but think that she loved John more in that moment than she had ever had in the past. To propose to her with her own mother's engagement ring had to be the most romantic gesture she had ever heard of. She knew then that she had made the right decision. Ashley had been so lost in thought that she hadn't even realized that three minutes had passed.

"What does yours say?"

"Negative"

"What does yours say?"

"Positive"

A/N: Wow I have had this chapter all planned out for months now and it feels good to get it out there. I know most of you are throwing parties right now over the fact that they are together. But you never know with those two lol. Again please no flames for the lyrics I wasn't going to put them but then I was like it would kinda add to the story … once again I do not own the lyrics they belong to the band Lifehouse.


	48. Chapter 48

_Chapter 48: What The Hell Do I Do Now?_

Phinnigan William Joshua Cena was utterly confused. He blinked a few times to make sure what he was seeing was real. He had gotten up in the early morning hours because he thought he heard monsters under his bed. Although his mommy and daddy told him that there was no such thing as monsters he didn't believe them. He crept quietly into his daddy's room and was pleasantly surprised to find his mommy and daddy sleeping in the same bed. His mommy and daddy never slept in the same bed even when mommy still lived with them. He frowned a little trying to figure out what had happened between the time he fell asleep till now. The only other time he could remember his mommy and daddy sleeping in the same bed was when he was just a little baby. He scrunched his little nose in concentration and made a mental note to have a long conversation with his Grandpa Fabo about this. He had long come to the conclusion that Grandpa Fabo and himself were the only two sane people in this house. He scratched his head, were mommies and daddies supposed to sleep in the same bed. He had never heard of such a thing before in his life but then again his mommy and Shane slept in the same bed. That reminded him he had to make sure his mommy took him to see his friend Kenyon. He loved Kenyon, he was his best friend and he even got to share a bedroom with him for a little while. But the only thing about seeing Kenyon was that Aurora would be close by. He didn't not like Aurora but she was a girl … a bossy one at that. He caught something sparkling from his mommy's finger. He walked closer to her to get a better look at the shiny thing. His pale green orbs studied it intently. He wondered if daddy have gave mommy this ring … of course he did because daddy was the bestest. Maybe that's why they were sleeping in the same bed because daddy had bought mommy a present. That's what it had to be.

Ashley's eyes fluttered open. She had internally felt someone studying her intently. She really wasn't all that surprised to find Phinnigan standing by the bedside.

"Phinney baby are you ok?" she asked him with sleep hazed concern.

"Monstas under ma bed" he insisted.

She nodded and moved over a little so that the toddler could get into bed and cuddle up to her. He closed his eyes immediately and she did too.

--

"You have to tell him" her cousin urged.

The woman in question glared at her relative. Obviously that was the case but how does one bring up such a tricky subject.

"He needs to know" she had a seat next to her cousin on the bathroom floor and wrapped her arms around her in a comforting manner.

"I know he does … they both do don't they" with a tired sigh the woman in question leaned into her cousin's embrace taking momentary comfort from it.

"Maybe it won't be that bad" blue-gray eyes clashed with brown ones. "ok so maybe it will be that bad but getting it out in the open is the only solution"

She placed a hand under the sweatshirt she was wearing so that she could touch her now flat stomach and wondered how this could have happened. This was something she never expected or knew how to deal with.

"Did you imagine our lives would turn out like this?" Ashley asked her cousin.

"No … no I didn't but maybe this is better than I could have imagined … maybe it's worse it's too soon to tell don't you think?"

She tried to imagine what her child would look like. She hoped he or she would have their father's dark hair and blue eyes and most of all she wanted this child to inherit his long beautiful eyelashes. But she couldn't think about this now, she had to figure out what she was going to do.

"What should I do Dommy?" the older woman asked pleading for some semblance of help but Dommy just shook her head.

"I can't tell you what to do … you know what you need to do" Dommy shook her head again "you need to tell John you are having a baby with his cousin"

"I can't he'll freak out and I refuse to hurt him like that"

"Then what are you going to do … pass the kid off as John's I mean sure John and Marc kinda look similar but that's still really cruel to both him and Marc"

"We don't even know if Marc even wants to know about this I mean he is doing just fine right now without a baby in his life" Ashley pointed out.

"You are reaching" Dommy replied.

"I wanna be 5 years old again where everything seems so simple and all I have to do is ask my mom for help"

"Well sweetie that's your job now … you are the mom and those kids need you and so do Randy and John cause lord knows I can't handle those two knuckleheads by myself I have no idea how you did it for so long"

"You just gotta love them and be patient just like kids"

"I'm not going to lie to you John will be pissed and he'll be hurt and he might even break off the engagement but at least he can take some comfort in the fact that you were honest with him"

"I just don't wanna break his heart … he's been through so much and I just can't add to that"

"Do you love John?" Dommy asked.

Ashley found the question odd. "Of course you know I do"

"Then tell him the damn truth girl Jesus my lord and savior I am sick and tired of hearing the same old whining when you know what you have to do so grow a set and just do it already"

"Fine" Ashley huffed getting up off the bathroom floor "I'll tell him"

Dommy shook her head as her cousin left the bathroom. "No she won't" she said to herself knowing all too well that Ashley's main focus was to save her own ass in this whole scenario. Although she knew that her cousin truly didn't want to hurt her new fiancée it would need to be done. Nobody wants to start their married life with a lie.


	49. Chapter 49

"Dean what do you want for dinner?" Dommy had gone into the room Dean shared with Phinnigan. She found the young boy sitting with his knees curled up against his chest sobbing.

"Sweetie what's the matter" she asked having a seat on his bed before taking the five year old boy into her arms. She began to rub his back and it was a few minutes before he let out on big sniffle and began to dry his eyes.

"I have to write a report for school" he sniffled again.

"Ok so what's so upsetting about that?" Dommy questioned.

"It's about our nationalities … that mean where our ancestors are from" he explained.

Dommy nodded her head but she couldn't help but thinking something like that wasn't a little advanced for someone so young. The young dark headed boy wiped his nose on the back of his hand. He miserably sat with his shoulders sagged. He was certainly a handsome little boy with his normally bright face and hazel eyes. He was about average height and build for someone his age and Ashley often teased Randy because Dean had similar elf-like ears as his father.

"So what's got you so sad?"

"I don't know my nationalities cause I was adopted" he sniffled again.

"Is that all" Dommy laughed a little against her better judgment.

The young boy didn't find his predicament funny at all. He stuck his chin out and little and crossed his little arms. With a frustrated look across his freckle covered face.

"It's not funny Dommy"

"Sorry sweetie I don't mean to laugh it's just that you can still write the report just because you were adopted doesn't mean that you don't have a heritage you are still part of a family so technically by adoption you are what they are" she tried her best to explain.

"I don't understand" he said.

"Take you Uncle John he's Italian right and Auntie Ashley is Irish and Canadian"

"And I think my daddy said he was Italian and Polish" Dean smiled brightly beginning to get what she was saying.

"So you see those a plenty of nationalities that you are"

"What are you Dommy? I want to put you in my report as well?" the little boy asked. It shouldn't have been such a big deal but Domonique's heart swelled up a little bit with joy.

"Well my mother who was Auntie Ashley's mother's sister is Irish and my father was Puerto Rican and African American"

Dean grinned as he ran over to his backpack and pulled out his notebook. He sat down at his little desk that Randy had purchased for him and began to write his report. Occasionally asking Dommy to spell some words that he wasn't sure how to spell. He handed her the finished product about 90 minutes later and Dommy told him that he had done a very good job on the report and that his teacher was surely going to give him a good grade on it.

"Thank you for the help Dommy" Dean hugged his father's girlfriend "I love you"

"I love you too sweetie" she kissed his cheek.

--

"My family" Dean began to read his report a few days later "my family isn't like every other family out there. My family is special because they chose me to be a member of their family. My daddy is of Polish and Italian decent and my Auntie Ashley is Irish and Canadian. My Uncle John's family is from Italy and my daddy's girlfriend is Irish, Puerto Rican and African American. So I guess you could say I'm Polish, Italian, Irish, Canadian, Puerto Rican and African American"

The older children began to laugh a little as Dean said he was African American. Dean looked at them puzzled; he didn't understand what was so funny. His teacher Ms. Clifford looked anything but pleased after Dean had finished his report.

"Dean please go over and sit in the corner for causing such a commotion" Ms Clifford reprimanded him.

"But I didn't do anything" Dean stated.

"Go!" she ordered.

Sullenly Dean made his way over to the stool in the corner. Muttering to himself that he had done nothing wrong.

When Ashley got a call from Dean's teacher at around lunch time she dropped everything else she was doing asked Fabo to watch Phinnigan and Faith and hopped into her car. Fearing something was wrong she rushed down a long hallway and made it to Dean's classroom in 20 seconds.

"Ms. Clifford is there something wrong with Dean?" Ashley asked upon entering the room.

"No, he fine sitting over there in the corner"

"Why isn't he out with the rest of the kids at recess?" she asked giving the short pudgy looking teacher a perplexed look.

"He's being punished for causing a disturbance in class" the teacher explained.

"Auntie I didn't do anything wrong" Dean piped up.

"Quiet Dean" the teacher raised her voice a little.

"I would appreciate if you wouldn't raise you voice at him like that" Ashley gave the teacher a hard threatening stare "Dean come here"

Dean did as he was told walking over to his aunt and hugging her leg. Ashley had a seat in a chair and Dean sat on her lap.

"So what is it that my nephew supposedly did?" Ashley asked annoyed with the teacher already. Dean was always such a well-behaved little boy so she doubted this was his fault.

"Did you read his report?" the teacher asked.

"Yes I did and I think it was a little ridiculous to have children as young as he is doing such a difficult project"

"Dean didn't follow any of the guidelines and this paper is excuse my French but its garbage"

Ashley swore she could see red. She wanted to reach across the desk the teacher was sitting behind and slap the woman and she would have to if Dean had not been in the room.

"Dean, sweetie why don't you go and play with your classmates while Auntie talks to your teacher" Ashley suggested sweetly to the young boy.

"Ok Auntie but I'm not in trouble am I?" he asked.

"Of course not baby you did nothing wrong" she sent a glare in the teacher's direction.

As soon as Dean was out of hearing range Ashley turned her attention back to the teacher. Her blue-gray eyes hardened. Oh this teacher didn't know what she was in for.

"How dare you call his hard work trash do you have any idea how upset he became because of this project … Dean's biological family died in a car accident while he was still and infant and you'd know that if you bothered doing any checking into it and he came home from school sobbing because he felt he couldn't write the paper but you know what my cousin his father's girlfriend helped him and you know what all the adults in our home thought he did a hell of a job and if you can't see that maybe you shouldn't be teaching" she fumed.

"Well I've been teaching first grade for almost 10 years now and I have never had a problem with any of my students completing this project until now" the orange haired woman adjusted her glasses on her nose.

"Well lady you won't have any problems from Dean anymore because I'm taking him out of this place"

"You don't have the right to do that" the teacher argued.

"The hell I don't … Dean's father has granted me guardianship of Dean while he travels with his company for work so you can see that I can do whatever I see fit for my nephew's wellbeing and you'd better believe that I will be bringing this matter not only the principal of this establishment but also the superintendent of school" with that Ashley got up from her seat and went over to Dean's cubby and grabbed his things.

"You just made the mistake of your life" she said leaving the room to take her nephew home.

Dean was now the first enrolled student in the WWE's new education program which had just been passed.


	50. Chapter 50

"Fabo do you like me more than you liked John's other fiancées?" Ashley asked out of the blue one day when it was just her and Johnny Fabulous home.

"Well Kelly was kinda a whore and … ugh don't even get me started on that other drunk ass girl he thought he was in love with I can't even say her name without wanting to punch something"

"Was she really that bad?" Ashley asked. Although she had never met John's first love she had heard stories about her from everyone.

"Ummm … how do I put this nicely HELL YES" Ashley giggled a little.

"You wanna watch some more Scrubs?" she asked.

Right after Fabo moved in with them Ashley had taken it upon herself to try and keep his mind off his cigars and all the other heart damaging activities that had caused him to have his first heart attack. They had started watching the show Scrubs together and now both of them were hooked.

"Sure sweetie" he said to her.

They sat down with a big bowl of fat free chips and two cans of caffeine free Sprite and began to watch the first disk of the third season but Ashley wasn't really into it. All she could think about was how her secret was going to hurt John in the worst possible way.

"What's the matter love?" Fabo asked. He had started calling her love years ago but recently every time he called her it she seemed to get upset. She wanted so badly to tell him what was bothering her but there was no way he would just accept what she had to say so she kept her mouth shut.

"Nothing everything is fine" she tried to hide her tears. Her pregnancy hormones were just starting to kick in, that added to her already guilty heart she was like a ticking time bomb waiting to happen.

After a while she decided she wanted to take a little walk to clear her head. It was a little cool so Ashley grabbed a hoodie and threw it on. As she walked she tried to think of every possible scenario of telling John the truth. On the one hand she and John weren't together when she and Marc slept together but she doubted that John would be too keen on having a constant reminder of that one time with Marc around. She shivered against the cool air as it rushed passed her face. It started to rain while she was still outside but she didn't really care. She was too wrapped up in her own thoughts to realize that it was even raining. She just kept walking and walking and walking some more. It was raining pretty hard before she decided to turn around and go home. She had been out walking for more than two hours in the cold rain before she finally made it home. She was exhausted by the time she got back. Fabo met her at the door.

"Where have you been I've been worried sick" the elder Cena scolded his soon to be daughter in law.

"I decided to clear my head" she replied.

"Go get changed you are soaked to the bone and look at you poor thing you are shivering and your teeth are starting to chatter"

Ashley did as she was told and got changed. She was so tired and worn out from walking around that she went right to sleep after changing. She woke up about 3 hours later shivering and she knew right away this wasn't good. John had come home and was sound asleep next to her.

"John" she whispered gently shaking him.

"Hey baby what's the matter?" he asked sitting up even in the dim lighting Ashley could see the concern on his face.

"I don't feel so good" she complained.

He placed a hand on her forehead and removed it quickly, she was burning up. He was no doctor but her body temperature had to be well over 100.

"We have to get you to a hospital" he said getting out of bed. He wasn't sure why he knew this but if a person's body temperature was over 105 then their brain would fry and he wasn't taking any chances.

I don't want to go to the hospital John" she whined. But then all of a sudden her eyes got very heavy and she fell back against her pillows.

A wide-eyed fear stricken John went over to his fiancée and tried to wake her up but she was unconscious. He threw on some clothes and momentarily debated taking her to the hospital himself or calling 911. He chose the later of the two and grabbed his cell phone. He could barely contain himself long enough to explain to the 911 operator what was wrong. She said she'd send some paramedics right out. John went to sit by his fiancée's side. Stroking her hair and telling her weakly that she was going to be alright. But he was scared … utterly scared. He could loose her and he didn't know if he could deal with that.


	51. Chapter 51

_Chapter 50: Past The Point of No Return_

_A/N: Warning mature content in this chapter._

It was dark out when Ashley opened her eyes again. She wasn't sure how much time had passed since she had blacked out but judging from the uncomfortable bed she was now occupying she knew she wasn't at home anymore. She could smell disinfectants and hear machine beeping in the distance. She figured they must have rushed her to the hospital. She looked down and could see John sleeping on a cot with one hand holding onto hers. He was sprawled out with his other arm behind his head. As if he could sense someone watching him he opened his eyes and grinned sleepily.

"Hey beautiful"

"What happened?" she asked removing the oxygen mask from her face. The moment she did she started having a very painful coughing fit. John jumped up and placed the mask back over his mouth and nose. Then he had a seat on the edge of the bed.

"You have pneumonia baby" he told her "your body temp spiked up really high and you passed out and have been sedated off and on for the past 5 days"

"Oh" was all she could say.

"Why didn't you tell me about the baby?" he asked. It was too dark to see his face but she didn't need to see it to know what was written all over it.

"I just found out and I was shocked and scared and I was going to tell you eventually I swear I was … I just didn't know how … I love you so much and the last thing I wanted to do was hurt you again"

"I'm not going to lie to you at first I was shocked and then I was pissed beyond all reason but then I started thinking about how devastated you'd be to find out that the baby was gone and I knew that would take precedence to anything I was feeling. I know how much you want to have a baby like every other woman in the world"

"I'm sad I'm not going to lie to you about that but I have you in my life and that is all I need even if I am never able to get pregnant again as long as I have you, Phinney and Faith then I don't need anything else"

"I love you so much" he hugged her "please never scare me like that again"

"I won't … you know I could probably make room for you next to me"

"You don't have to tell me twice" he grinned laying down next to her. He took her hand and brought it to his lips placing a gentle kiss on it before letting it rest with their fingers intertwined.

"John do you ever imagine what our kids would be like if we could have them?" she asked.

"Sometimes" he admitted which surprised the hell out of her "I always picture a little girl that is exactly like her mama in every way"

"I just want a little boy with your dimples" she traced the side of his face with her finger tips.

"Maybe we'll get lucky" he grinned at her mischievously.

"I don't think I like that look in your eyes Mr. Cena"

"Can't mean anything good" his grin grew and now he resembled the Cheshire Cat.

"Not anything good at all"

He began kissing her collarbone. Before moving down to her bare shoulder. She closed her eyes enjoying the feeling. But it was short lived when they heard foot steps down the hall.

"John please someone could walk in" she whispered.

"So where is your sense of adventure" he took a moment to look her in the yes "I have walked in on too many people having sex lately and now I think it should be my turn to be walked in on"

"Ok that's kinda strange"

"Don't ask I still have nightmares about it" but even that didn't deter him from his mission to show this woman how much he wanted and needed her. He took into consideration that she was still recovering from a bad case of pneumonia but he knew that what he was planning on doing to her would make her feel just as good as it would him. He slipped his hand under the covers of the bed knowing full well that she was wearing one of those flimsy hospital jonnies and nothing else. His eyes were twinkling with mischief as he crept his hand under the jonnie and began caressing her inner thigh.

"John " she hissed "not here"

"If you can honestly look me in the eyes and tell me you don't want me then I will stop" he said knowing that it would be hard to deal with the raging hard on he now had but he would do it for her to make sure that she was comfortable.

"Would you really not have sex with me if I told you I didn't want to?" she asked.

"Yeah … if you said not now and I forced myself on you that is rape in my book and I ain't about that"

"Will you at least see if there is a way to lock the door?" she asked.

His grin was back as he hopped off the bed and went to inspect the doorknob. There was no way to lock the damn thing but he opened the door a crack to see if anyone was coming. The coast was clear and John doubted that anyone would come to check on her anytime soon. He strolled casually over to her but stopped before he reached the bed and quickly rid himself of his shirt.

"Nobody is coming baby" he said 'let me show you how much I love you"

She gulped a little and nodded. There was no use fighting it John with his shirt off was quite persuasive. Inside her head were all these wicked thoughts of what she wanted to do to him the moment she was well enough. He climbed back into bed with her and rid her of the jonnie. He removed her oxygen mask and waited a moment to make sure she could do without it. She didn't cough at all which made him grin all the more. Bending down to capture her lips with his own. He broke the kiss and looked her in the eyes.

"If you need me to stop at any time just let me know ok"

"Ok" she said but doubted she'd want him to stop.

He kissed her again it was soft and warm but then his tongue danced against her lips looking for access to her mouth. She opened her mouth to let his tongue in. His left hand was free to caress her body at will. He eventually found what he was looking for with agile fingers began stroking her. She bit down kissed him deeper to muffle her cries of ecstasy. His mouth left hers as he bent down to take a nipple into his mouth. His warm tongue flicked over it. She bit down on her lip so hard she was surprised it didn't bleed. A low moan emerged from her throat. John took great pleasure that he could evoke such a sound from the woman he loved. When he finally grew bored with playing with her breasts he kissed her again. She began trying to unzip his jeans while still kissing him.

"Someone's a little eager" he laughed a little.

"Baby I need you" her voice was husky . She leaned back against her pillows as seductively as she could seeing as she was still in a hospital bed and she probably looked half dead. But that didn't matter to him, he loved her. He stood from the bed and stripped off his pants and boxers. She sucked in a breath as she always did upon seeing John naked. There was something so majestic to her about seeing him naked. He took his place over her and spread her legs with his knee. He entered her slowly taking his time because he knew she wasn't 100 percent yet. She grabbed onto his muscular ass and helped him move in and out. She closed her eyes enjoying the feeling of the man she loved inside her. She would never admit this to him but the rush of being caught only added to the excitement. The waves of climax washed over her then she gripped onto his shoulders and threw her head back. Knowing her like he did he kissed her again to quiet her. She shuddered a little beneath him as her pleasure overcame her. He was nearing his own climax now. He squeezed his eyes shut in and out he went until finally he exploded within her collapsing next to her carefully. She cuddled up closer to him and he wrapped his arms around her.

"I love you so much" she traced circles on his muscular arm.

He kissed the top oh her head "Me too baby me too"

Neither wanted to move but both knew they had to get redressed just incase someone did decide to check on Ashley. After getting situated in bed again both drifted off into a peaceful slumber.


	52. Chapter 52

Ashley was still very sore as she walked with John's assistance into her home. A big welcome home mommy banner was hung up in the foyer and all the kids hand dipped their hands in paint to decorate it. John helped her sit down in a comfortable chair in the living room. Dean ran to greet her with a hug and a kiss. She held Faith for a little while but Phinnigan was nowhere to be found. Sending a questioning glance in John's direction her fiancée shrugged. She got herself out of the chair. Stopping John with her hand before he could offer her help.

"I need to do this on my own besides my chest hurts I'm not immobile" she said to him. Begrudgingly he nodded his understanding and she went to go find her toddler son.

He wasn't hard to find. A huge lump under the covers of his bed gave him away instantly. Ashley walked over to the bed and had a seat on it. Pulling back the covers slightly she met eyes with her son who quickly turned over to hide his face from her.

"Phinney what's the matter?" she asked wanting nothing more than to reach out and take the little boy into her arms.

He didn't say anything nor did he make any motions to move. Frowning slightly she tried to think of what she could have possibly done to anger the toddler.

"Baby are you mad at me?" she asked him.

"Scared" came a muffled voice.

"Scared of what baby?" she asked beginning to rub his back a little.

"You go to hospiple" he turned over to face her. Some of his dirty blonde hair was in his eyes. His round face was red with tears.

"Phinney were you awake when the men came to take me to the hospital?" she asked.

"Uh huh"

"Oh baby come here" she wrapped her arms around his small frame. He in return wrapped his little arms around her neck.

"Mommy isn't going anywhere anymore I promise" she kissed the top of his head.

Phinnigan must have heard all the noise and seen the flashing lights and went to investigate. Seeing two strange men in his home wheeling his unconscious mother out on a stretcher and then going to look for his daddy who had left with the paramedics must have been extremely scary for him. Ashley held the toddler in her arms for a long time. She eventually felt his breathing become slower and more relaxed. He had fallen asleep in her arms. She kissed his cheek before tucking him into bed.

Dommy was waiting for her when she left Phinnigan's room. Ashley gave her cousin a smile and Dommy wrapped an arm around the older woman's shoulders.

"So you seem happy so either you told John about the baby and he was ok with it or you got some"

"Both actually" Ashley gave her cousin a wink and a smirk that only could be matched by Randy Orton and walked away. Leaving her cousin speechless.

Recovering from her shock she followed her cousin. Feeling the need to express her disgust that her cousin had had sex with her fiancée in a hospital.

"You randy bastards! I can't believe you would have sex in a public place like that!" She exclaimed.

Ashley's face turned bright red. Fabo had been sitting in the living room with John's mother Carol and her own father and his girlfriend.

"H … hey guys" Dommy remarked.

"Can we just rewind these last 10 seconds and pretend like my cousin isn't such an idiot?" Ashley asked.

"Sure we can sweetie" her father agreed for all of them.

"So you and Ashley is a hospital bed … you are an animal man" both men grinning until they discovered what the two girls already had.

"Well at least he's having sex with a nice girl" Carol interjected.

"Ma" John groaned "you guys aren't supposed to know what we do behind closed doors"

"John … you have never been very discreet about your sexual endeavors" Fabo added.

"It's not like your father and I never had sex so there is really nothing to be embarrassed about"

"Oh my god … we are not having this conversation anymore" John decided "as far as I am concerned nobody in this room has had sex"

"Oh virgins again that could be kinda kinky" Ashley poked fun at John's embarrassment.

"Please stop" he pleaded with her.

"That's not what you'll be saying later tonight" she whispered seductively into his ear.

"Are you serious cause I will kick all these people out right now if that's the case" eagerness shone in his blue eyes.

She laughed a little at him "Hell no I'm getting some sleep tonight"

"That was cold"

"So is the shower you'll be taking later" Dommy couldn't stop herself from adding.

Both Randy and Ashley smirked but said nothing. John opened his mouth to speak but closed it again soon after. Dommy grinned victoriously finally able to get one up on John. They had been doing this to each other since they first met all those years ago and John had always won but now it was her turn to come out on top and she was going to savor it.

"So daddy how's life?" Ashley asked plopping down next to her father and his girlfriend.

"Good" he replied. Ashley rested her head again Lilian's shoulder and the older woman patted her hand.

Ashley was very lucky that she had such a great relationship with her father's new girlfriend. It made the fact that her father was dating again so much easier.

"So how's the family?" she asked teasingly.

"Becky's just starting to show and let me tell you she is driving your brother crazy now" her father grinned a little "poor boy doesn't know what hit him"

"He'll learn … let's just hope Keegan is smarter than that"

"You know he's graduating this year instead of next year right"

"Yea he called and told me his school let him skip a grade" Ashley boasted proudly. With her dad not around as much as one would like Ashley had taken on the role of caring for Keegan for most of his life and so it almost felt like he was her own son who was graduating high school a year early.

"He's got a good head on his shoulders" Dommy added to the conversation "not like his two older siblings"

Ashley flung a pillow at her cousin's head which hit Randy instead. Ashley covered her mouth in surprise and tried not to laugh "Sorry Rans that was not aimed at you"

"Yeah … yeah you and your sucky aim"

"Hey didn't I say something like that to you the other night in bed Randy"

"Here we are back to sex" John rolled his eyes. This was not the conversation he wanted to be having with his parents in the room.

"Well stop lookin so sexy and maybe I won't want to have sex with you as much" it was too easy to get John all riled up.

"Maybe I'll just stop having sex with you then"

Fabo let out a snort "Good one son you are forgetting that I live here and I see how you two act you wouldn't even make it a day"

"Yeah you are probably right" the younger Cena agreed.

"Now with all the sexual jokes out of the way can we eat cause I'm starving" Ashley remarked.

"Sure what are you making?" Randy asked.

"Fuck that shit I'm not cooking I just spent a week in a hospital bed so someone else will be cooking for my ass"

"Burgers and hotdogs it is then" John said.

A/N: There is going to be a little bit of a time jump in the next couple of chapters just to focus more on Becky and her pregnancy. Let me tell you that's gonna be one hell of an adventure.


	53. Chapter 53

_Chapter 53: Meet the Family_

Things were quiet, it was times like these that Ashley loved the most. It was just a few weeks before Christmas and the whole family had taken some much needed vacation time and rented a spacious cottage in Vermont. It was snowing outside and Fabo had lit a roaring fire in the cottage's huge fireplace. Crackling sparks could be heard as the fragrant aroma filled the room. John sleepily wrapped an arm around his fiancée's waist pulling her down into a lying position with him on the couch. They were watching a movie and Ashley had sat up to look at the falling snow outside. It was late but she couldn't wait for baby Faith to wake up so she could see snow for the first time in her short 7 month existence. Faith had lived most of her short life in Tampa so she had no idea what it was like to see snow falling.

"My dad and Lilian are bringing their new foster child up here tomorrow" Ashley said with a yawn.

"Did they give you any more info about him?" John asked nuzzling his lover's neck.

"Nope, nothing other than the fact that his name is Quentin Fields and that he likes basketball"

--

"Whatcha lookin at Quentin?" Lilian asked looking over her foster son's shoulder at the picture he was holding.

"Are these your kids?" he asked.

"I guess you could say that, they are Chris's kids Ashley, Connor, and Keegan"

He put the picture down and grabbed the next one resting on the mantle place. "These his grandkids?"

"Yeah, that's Phinnigan, Dean and Faith"

"Interesting names huh?" Quentin said.

"Chris's late wife was Irish hence the unusual names"

"If ya'll already have kids why do you want me?" Quentin asked still not believing that a wealthy white family would want someone like him.

"Because everyone needs a family Quentin" she said giving him a smile.

He liked Lilian right off the bat. She was the warm and bubbly maternal type where as Chris was more quiet and reserved. He really hadn't gotten the chance to sit down and have a talk with his foster father as of yet. He still wasn't sure if he wanted to be here. He wasn't sure if he wanted to be a part of this family or any other .

"You'll soon find out that our family isn't like most others and that we all have a special place in our hearts for children who don't have anyone else"

"What does that mean?" he asked.

"You'll see but right now it's getting late and you've had a long day so why don't you get some rest" she suggested.

He looked at her to see if she was serious. He hadn't heard someone tell him to go to bed in quiet some time. His mother had died almost 3 year prior and ever since Quentin and his two younger brothers Alexander and James had been shuffled from home to home where nobody seemed to really care what they did. Xander and Jamie at ages 3 and 5 were lucky enough to be adopted but their 16 year old brother wasn't as lucky. Nobody seemed to want him that was until now. He hadn't expected to be taken care of and at this point he really didn't want to be. Lilian seemed to be serious, rather than start a fight he nodded and headed to his room.

--

They were already at the airport at 5:30 am that next morning to catch an early flight to Burlington, Vermont. Where they would then drive an hour to get to the cabin where his foster parent's family was vacationing for Christmas.

"I really think you'll fit in well with our family Q" Lilian said referring to him with the nickname he had asked them to call him by.

Q wasn't listening he had his head rested against the cool plane of glass. His breaths frosting over the window. His eyes were closed. Lilian wasn't sure if he was sleeping or just deep in thought. Either way she left him alone. Thirty minutes later they pulled into a driveway of a large cabin. Fresh snow covered the ground. Q had his eyes open now and although he would never admit it he was a little excited to get out of the car. He had never seen snow before now and all he wanted to do was touch it and see if it felt like what he had dreamt as a child. He got out of the car and shivered against the bitter cold air. He bent over and touched the cold wet snow with his fingertips. He closed his eyes and enjoyed the moment. But it was short lived because he was plastered with a snow ball in the back of the head.

"What the …" he stood up quickly and could hear the sound of young children giggling.

"Where are my boys" Chris bent down and pulled two small boys dressed in identical winter jackets and hats into his arms.

"Grampa put down" Phinnigan demanded wanting to throw more snowballs.

"What no hello to your old grandpa?" Chris mocked being offended.

"Hi Grandpa Chris" Dean offered.

Dean called Chris grandpa as well and he wouldn't even listen when people tried to explain that Chris wasn't his grandfather. It could be said that Dean had adopted Chris.

"Hey buddy" he grinned "where are your parents"

"We hidin from dada an Ranny" Phinnigan explained.

"Oh well ok you boys have fun" he put them down and they ran off.

Q smiled at the two boys. They reminded him of his brothers. Thinking of them even if it was only briefly brought a pain of hurt to his heart. He scowled trying not to think of them anymore.

"Come on honey it's cold out here" Lilian said.

He nodded and followed her into the cabin. Just as he was about to shut the door he heard one of the boys let out a squeal and he guessed they must have been found.

It was nice and warm inside the cabin. A roaring fire was lit in the main living room and 3 women and two men were lounging around.

"That's Dommy, Becky, and Ashley and the two boys are Keegan and Connor" Lilian whispered to him.

"Bout time you got here" Ashley called from her spot. She was sprawled out on the couch with her head resting on Dommy's lap.

"You look comfortable" Lilian laughed.

"Believe me I am"

"Where's Faith?" Chris asked joining the rest of his family in the living room.

"Taking a nap and don't you dare wake her" Ashley told him "It took me forever to get her to sleep"

"Come on I missed my granddaughter" Chris shot her an almost pleading look.

His daughter rolled her eyes at him "Fine but she's yours for the rest of the night"

"Deal"

"Chris is very attached to his granddaughter" Lilian once again whispered to Q.

"So where's my foster brother?" Ashley asked "is he outside with the boys"

"No he's standing right next to me" Lilian said "everyone this is Quentin but he prefers to be called Q"

"Lil, I though he'd be 6 not 6'2" Ashley said.

"Don't pay her any mind Q … she's bitchy by nature" Dommy remarked earning a dirty look from her cousin.

"Some cousin you are"

"Wait you two are cousins?" Q asked incredulously.

"Unfortunately" both women said at the same time.

"Like for real cousins or was one of you adopted?" he asked.

"No, her mother was my mom's sister" Ashley said.

"But she's black and well you ain't"

"And your point is?" Dommy asked.

"It's just ironic that's all"

"We never really pay attention to race in this family Q … you could be purple and we wouldn't care"

Maybe that's what Lilian meant last night when she said you'll soon find out that our family isn't like most others. Maybe he had been wrong about them the whole time. He wasn't sure if he wanted to let his guard down around these people but it did help to know they weren't a bunch of racists either. He'd give it a try for now.

A/N: Wow sorry it took me so long to write this but I have had tons of stuff going on all at once and it's hard to find time to sit down and write. I know that's not an excuse but it's all I got. Everyone tell me what you think of Q. He was one of my fav One Tree Hill characters and then they killed him off and I decided to save him and modify him of course. Well the next update will be up sooner. Peace out homies.


	54. Chapter 54

_Chapter 54: Stepford Family_

Dinner was awkward for Q he sat and watched as everyone around him interacted. He had never had such a peaceful dinner in his life, it unnerved him. Everyone was talking and laughing and just enjoying each other's company. Even the kids were quiet and respectful. Nobody yelled or threw food or nagged at one another. He truly felt like an outsider just watching this perfect little family.

"After dinner the boys and Randy are getting a haircut" Ashley announced.

"Why me?" Randy asked.

"Cause your hair is too long" she remarked making a face.

"Baby?" Randy turned to his girlfriend. She nodded in agreement with her cousin.

Randy sighed a little bit and returned his attention to his food. He was sulking slightly but he didn't say anything further. The men cleared the table and cleaned the kitchen while the women, who cooked the dinner relaxed. Finally when they were done Ashley brought out her hair cutting kit.

"Randy you are first up" Ashley said.

He reluctantly walked over and had a seat in the vacant chair in the middle of the kitchen floor. She winked at both boys as she began to buzz his hair away.

"Try not to nick me as much this time" he complained.

"Don't piss me off and I won't"

She hummed to herself as she buzzed the sides and back of his head. She left the top long so she could spike it up into a Mohawk. The boys giggled quietly as they watched Randy, who was completely unaware that he was getting anything other than his normal haircut. After about 15 minutes she was all done.

"Ok big guy you are free to go" she grinned at him.

"Daddy I like your haircut I want one just like it" Dean managed to say between fits of giggles.

Randy had a nervous feeling as he took the little hand mirror she had left on the counter. His eyes went wide as he took in his hair.

"What did you do!" he exclaimed.

"Oh come on Randy it looks cool"

"Yeah daddy you are the coolest guy ever with your new haircut" Dean piped up and Phinnigan nodded.

Dommy walked into the kitchen and tried her hardest not to laugh. But she couldn't help it and began to laugh hysterically.

"Very rocker baby" she gasped .

"My turn" Dean hopped up into the chair "make me look like daddy"

Ashley gave both boys their own Mohawks. It looked cuter on them then it did Randy. Faith watched them and once Ashley was all done cutting Phinnigan's hair she began to whine and point to her own head. Ashley rolled her eyes and relented but instead of cutting Faith's beautiful dirty blonde curls she simply jelled her hair up.

"Now all 4 of you look like rock stars and you know what I think we need some rock music" Ashley went into the parlor and turned on the huge sound system. She cranked the volume up and the whole room practically shook as P!nk's So What began to play. The boys began jumping around and Ashley pulled John up and wrapped her arms around his neck as she moved her body against his. John smirked as he let her dance against him. Dommy grabbed a still pouting Randy's hand and brought him to dance with her too. Dean ran over and turned the lights down so it felt more like a club. He then picked Faith up and danced with her for a little bit. Phinnigan was still jumping around bobbing his head to the loud music. Keegan , Chris, Lilian and Q watched from the sidelines.

"So what do you think of them?" Lilian asked him as they watched.

Keegan joined in, he picked his nephew up and began playfully spinning him around and dancing crazily with him.

"Well they are interesting" was all he could reply.

"Believe me they grow on you after a while" Lilian assured him "they amazing thing about all of them is how they've all come together to take care of each other"

"What do you mean?"

"Follow me into the other room" he did as he was told. They went into a more quiet room, a library as a matter of fact.

"You'd think that Ashley and Randy were siblings the way those two fight" she laughed.

"What's their deal?"

"Ashley and Randy have been best friends for years and then John was added into the picture and then they adopted Phinnigan and Faith and Dean"

"All three kids were adopted?" he asked incredulously.

"Yes, Ashley and John found Phinnigan in a parking lot" Lilian explained.

"You can't be serious who leaves their kid in a parking lot?"

"People who were really young and confused"

"Something in Ashley's past compelled her to adopt Phinnigan and she enlisted John's help to make it look better in the adoption process and let me tell you the journey those two have been on just to get engaged would make your head spin. While going to get Phinnigan from the orphanage he was staying in Randy fell in love with Dean and adopted him and then two years later Ashley and John got a call saying Phinnigan had a sister and they took her home too. So you can see when I tell you that I meant when I said our family has more than enough room in their hearts for someone who has nobody else" she smiled at him.

"What happened to Ashley that made her adopt Phinnigan?" Q asked.

"That you will need to ask her about … that's her story not mine"

"Do you think she'll tell me?" he asked.

"I don't see why she wouldn't … but let me tell you this Ashley is an amazing person and I think you'll really be able to relate to her so let her in. She'll understand anything you tell her and probably will be able to relate to it"

"Yeah sure what could she possibly know about my life" he scoffed.

"You'd be surprised" Lilian wore a knowing smile. "now go and have some fun"

She shooed him from the room. Oh Ashley knew more than she would ever admit to what this young man was going through. She was the reason he was here now. Because of what she had said to Chris about children out there needing homes and loving parents. Q owed Ashley more than he could ever know and knowing her she'd let him know it too.

A/N: Damn I hate filler chapters. The next one will be up soon. Just to throw this out there for those of you who want to know what their favorite Ride characters look like they have their very own folder deidcated to them on my myspace. Like I said just throwing that out there. Also I know Tiff you were supposed to write this chapter but I was incredibly bored and P!nk inspired me so I was like what the hell. Thank you for the dinner idea tho. Of couse you could have written it a million times better than I did. Luv ya ... don't kill me.


	55. Chapter 55

_Chapter 55: An Unexpected Turn of Events_

Dommy and Randy were cuddled up on the same couch much as John and Ashley were the night before. Dommy was sitting against Randy so that her back was against his chest. She sighed in contentment and he wrapped his arms loosely around her waist. They were watching The Bodyguard.

"I'm surprised Ashley isn't around she loves this movie" Dommy said.

"She and John are watching it in the bedroom" Randy replied lazily drawing circles against her flat stomach.

"That tickles" she grinned at him.

John's cell phone began ringing and Dommy sighed in frustration. She debated answering it or not but then she took into consideration that it was almost 2am she figured it must be important. Muttering to herself she left the comfort of Randy's arms to go answer the phone.

"Hello" she irritably answered the phone.

"Is John there?" an older female voice asked.

"Umm … yea hold on like one second and I'll get him"

Curiosity got to her as she walked quickly as she could to the bedroom Ashley and John were occupying. She didn't bother knocking as she entered the room. Two pairs of startled eyes stared at her. Much like Randy had said they were watching television in bed, which was fortunate for her because if they were doing anything else she was pretty sure she'd have to rip her eyes out.

"Jackass you have a call" she practically snapped at him.

"Who is it?" he asked.

"Mother fucker how should I know I didn't ask … it's some woman" her cousin raised an eyebrow at her fiancée.

"Don't give me that look I haven't done anything wrong" he told her.

He got up and brusquely walked past Dommy to the kitchen where he had left his phone to charge. The cold winter air nipped at the exposed skin of his naked chest. Causing goose bumps to form. He brought the phone to his ear. Ashley was instantly at his side curious as much as her cousin who lingered nearby.

"Hello" he said. His eyes sparked with recognition of the voice on the phone. His mouth set into a thin line as to not give away any emotions.

"Uh huh" he said "ok well thanks for letting me know and I am truly sorry for your loss"

Confusion crossed over Ashley's soft features. Who had died? Surely it wasn't someone close to them otherwise the person would have asked for both of them.

"Baby are you alright?" she asked concerned.

"That was Kelly's mom" was all he said.

Ashley very noticeably winced at the sound of the other woman's name. She instinctively inched closer to John. Wrapping her arms around him.

"What did she say? Who died?" he gave her a look like that should be obvious. Ashley swallowed hard, it hit her right after she asked the question.

"Oh John I … I'm so sorry" she surprised herself by saying.

"Why are you telling me you are sorry?" he asked "yeah I'm sad that she's gone but I don't regret breaking up with her or anything. I'm much happier now with you then I ever was with her" it was his turn to wrap his arms around her. He kissed her softly on the lips and she rested her head against his chest so she could hear his heartbeat.

Dommy left them alone so they could talk. She had never met Kelly so she personally didn't care if she had lived or died. But she had heard her cousin's stories about the woman and her wicked ways. If Dommy had anything to say about the subject it would be this, it couldn't have happened to a nicer person.

"Do you want to go to the funeral?" Ashley asked after a long silence.

"I don't know and I don't want to think about it anymore tonight" he affirmed. But there was sadness in his eyes that he didn't want to admit to.

"Ok" she nodded letting go of him before grabbing his hand and leading him back into the bedroom.

"For what it's worth I think you should go" she said to him. They were laying in bed now and he could just barely make out her face in the dim lighting. She was propped up on her elbow. Her eyes staring back into his.

"Why?" he asked, he couldn't keep the hints of bitterness out of his voice.

"Because she was part of your past … a past that we swept under the rug" she said "I think going and saying goodbye would be good for you John. You may not see it now but you need closure"

"Would it bother you if I went?" he asked her wanting her honest answer.

"I wouldn't have suggested it if it did" was her reply.

"Do you want to go too?" at that she let out a low chuckle.

"I don't think that is a good idea … the casket might somehow burst into flames if I go near it" he let out a half hearted laugh. "but seriously go. Me and the kids will be here when you get back"

"Ok I'll go" he kissed her forehead "thank you"

"For what?"

"For just being you" there was a hint of a smile on his face.

"Go to sleep crazy man" she rolled her eyes and let him pull her closer to him.

A/N: This chapter is for Dommy cause I know she doesn't feel well and I want to help cheer her up a little.


	56. Chapter 56

Ashley sat on the back steps of the cabin's porch watching the snow fall. In her hands was a lit cigarette, she hadn't had a cigarette in almost a year and a half and wasn't really sure why she was smoking now.

"Umm… Ashley can I talk to you?" Q shyly asked.

"Sure" she said patting the spot next to her.

"You smoke?" he asked taking a seat next to her.

"No, not really I stopped a while ago but I found this last one hidden away and I wanted to remember why I even liked these" she explained.

"Ok I guess"

"Listen I'm sorry about the way we met I just never saw my dad adopting a teenager, he always said once Keegan turned 20 and he was free from all the pain in the ass teenage problems he would be a happy man" she took another drag of her cancer stick.

"It's ok to tell you the truth I wasn't really receptive to all this family stuff anyway" he told her.

"Then boy did you get stuck with the wrong people" she said with a laugh.

"Lilian told me we had a lot in common" he started out. It had been nagging him not knowing what his foster mother had meant about Ashley and him having similar experiences.

Ashley gave a bitter laugh and took another drag and held the smoke in for a few moments before blowing it out slowly "Of course she would say that"

"So it's not true?" he asked.

"Not exactly" she said.

"Then what was she talking about?"

"Were you ever hit Q?" she asked.

"No" he replied confused.

"Then you are a lucky lucky boy" her tone was one of resentment towards who Q had no idea and he wasn't sure he wanted to know.

"My mother, my father's first wife died when I was 14 years old and my father was so unbalanced that he put me and my brothers into a foster home and they weren't nice at all" she explained "Keegan was always really small for his age and he used to get picked on so I would defend him and I would get beaten. If I cried they beat me harder. The harder they beat me the madder they would get and sometimes they would get so mad at me that not only would they beat me and then starve me but they would chain me to a wall in the basement and if they had company over or god forbid DSS and I even made a peep they told me they would kill my brothers in front of me"

"That's some crazy shit" Q was stunned "did you ever report them?"

"After my father took us back it took me a long time to tell him what had happened to me. I was afraid that he would get so mad that he would kill those people and part of me was ashamed to think that I was that weak to let them do that to me"

"It wasn't your fault you were just a kid"

"I know that now and if I had to go back in time I wouldn't change it because I would die for my brothers and they know that and the fact that they never got hurt or tortured and they always got food made the beatings more endurable"

"So were those people ever caught?"

"Not exactly, one night the wife came home and found her husband cheating on her so she blew his brains out and his mistress's too and well she wasn't going to jail for murder so she put the barrel in her mouth … and well you get the picture"

"So what does that have to do with you adopting Phinnigan and Faith?" he asked.

"The first rule about abuse it always do it somewhere people won't see it and what a better place to punch someone repeatedly then the abdomen which for a female is where the womb is well unfortunately due to all the damage done it is highly unlikely that I could conceive a child and carry it to term" she closed her eyes thinking of the baby she had lost ever so briefly then she shook her head and met his eyes.

"I never got hit" he said "but I've been in some pretty nasty homes, no food, bugs crawling everywhere, houses reeking of urine and feces" he grimaced "it wasn't pretty"

"Lilian and Chris are good people and they will help you in whatever way they can"

"Yeah well they can't get my brothers back can they cause then I'd believe you" he muttered his own bitterness surfacing.

"What happened to your brothers?" she asked.

"They were adopted but the family didn't want to deal with a teenager and I thought I was gonna be one of those kids who aged out of the system" he admitted.

"I'm sorry to hear about your brothers but maybe after a little while some sort of visitation could be set up I know my dad would definitely help you out with that and I'll help you in any ways I can too but you have to let us help you otherwise you are only hurting yourself"

"Why would any of you want to help me?" he asked sullenly.

"Well why would I adopt a baby I found in the shrubbery of a parking lot?" she countered "because it is easy to just cast your problems aside and not care but it takes real fortitude to nurture that problem and watch it blossom"

"What the hell did you just say"

She let out a good natured laugh "I was kinda on a roll and couldn't remember what I was talking about so I just said the first things that came to mind"

"Oh" he laughed as well.

"Seriously once you get past the feeling like you don't belong I'm sure you'll find out that you really do belong … we are one crazy group and any one of us will admit that but there is a lot of love to be given out if you want it"

"So you guys all kinda adopted each other?" he asked.

"Yeah I guess you could say that" she nodded.

"That's interesting I guess"

"Yeah it kinda is" she agreed.

"So no more thinking I'm just some poor charity case?" he asked.

"Believe me you aren't Chris will have your behind employed some how by the end of this year" she promised. "He is incredibly strict like that but he's got his good qualities too"

"Like what?" Q asked.

"You can tell him anything and he will never judge you and he always knows exactly what to say when you need to hear it and he celebrates your accomplishments no matter how small. I remember once when I was 4 I learned to tie my shoes all by myself and he went out and bought me a cake" she smiled at the memory.

"What about Lilian?"

"She's the warmest and kindest person I have ever met" Ashley replied honestly "I have never seen someone just take to their significant other's kids they way she did me and my brothers. She'll never take the place of our mom and she's ok with that but that doesn't stop her from acting as if we were her children. She's even that way with John and Randy. A few weeks ago Randy had the sniffles while on the road and she made him lay down on a couch and she made him chicken soup"

"Can I ask you a question why did you fight so hard to protect your brothers?"

"After Keegan was born my mother took me aside and she told me something I will never forget" Ashley sighed, her eyes getting a little misty "she said if anything ever happens to me or your dad it's your job to protect your brothers and I took that job seriously … maybe a little too seriously but I love those two boys fiercely and would do anything for them"

"My mom … she left us when my youngest brother was a year old and none of us ever knew our dads although she told us it was all the same guy I doubt it. She was a junkie but she was my mom ya know"

"Nobody's perfect Q" Ashley sympathized with the young boy "everyone has their demons"

"You don't"

"I was addicted to pain killers by the age of 20 and was forced into rehab by my father and then I became an alcoholic by the age of 26 and was back in rehab. Q some people need to hit rock bottom before they can climb that mountain again"

"Where did John go?" he asked.

"He had to take care of one of his demons"

"Thanks for talking to me I'm starting to understand that maybe I do belong here"

"Believe me kid you do and you are welcome"

"I think I'm going to like having a big sister"

"Well I just happen to like little brothers" she smiled at him "I don't know if you are too old but there is a whole plate of freshly made chocolate chip cookies in the microwave just don't let the kids see you"

"One is never too old for cookies"

"Then go on boy" Ashley laughed as Q practically sprinted back into the house.

"I kept my promise mama" she whispered closing her eyes and letting the cold wind caress her cheeks.


	57. Chapter 57

"John thank you so much for coming" Victoria McMahon hugged her daughter's ex-boyfriend. "Kelly would have wanted you here"

"Thank you for calling me and giving me a chance to pay my last respects"

"Well I figured you being her fiancée you should be called. It's such a shame with the wedding only a month away and you had to fly all the way here from Barcelona"

"Wait ... what I'm confused"

"Barcelona, isn't that where you've been shooting your new movie, Kelly told us that was the reason we haven't seen you all these months"

"Umm yeah Barcelona is amazing" John didn't have the heart to break the grieving mother's heart.

"You were always such a good boy John" she touched his cheek "you made Kelly so happy"

"She'll be missed" John shook his head sadly.

"She was always such a little spoiled brat but you saw past that John and you loved her anyways"

"If you'll excuse me I just have to make a phone call and check on my son"

"Of course"

John got out of dodge as fast as he could. He stepped outside the small funeral home. Putting his cell phone to his ear he waited patiently as it rang.

"Hello"

"Hey baby" he grinned "whoops sorry Dommy you sound like Ash on the phone"

"Wrong female Jackass"

"Ash" he tentatively asked as another female voice answered the phone.

"I thought Dommy was you before don't know how that works considering you have two different accents. Anyways guess who was supposed to get married next month ... me and Kelly"

"Confused"

"She never told her parents about the break up and was going ahead planning our wedding"

"I told you she was a crazy whore but you didn't believe me" she sighed taking no pleasure is saying I told you so "hold on John someone wants to talk to you"

John smiled as he heard Ashley telling Faith to say hi to dada. At 7 months she was still a little too young to talk but it was sweet none the less.

"Hey daddy's princess how are you doing?" he smiled as he listened to her babble into the phone "is your brother being good"

Faith continued to babble into the phone which made John's heart melt a little more. Then he heard her cry in outrage.

"Hi daddy" a sheepish little voice said.

"Phinnigan did you take the phone away from your sister?" John asked in a stern tone.

"Yes" he replied.

"That wasn't very nice Phin your sister was talking to me"

"I wanna talk too"

"I know you do buddy but your sister was talking to me first and it is unfair of you to grab the phone out of her hand and now I think you owe her an apology"

"Sworry Fafe"

"Good boy I'm proud of you"

"Daddy you bring me home presents?" Phinnigan asked hopefully.

"They don't exactly have presents where I am buddy" John said.

"Pwease Daddy" Phinnigan begged.

"We'll see"

"Otay Daddy"

"Can you put mommy on now?" John asked.

"Yep bye Daddy luff yous"

"I love you too little man"

"How are you doing?" she asked concerned.

"I'm a bit freaked out but I'll be ok"

"Well Kelly is with the lord now and the final judgment is his"

"Since when did you become all spiritual?" John asked.

"I was raised by a strict Irish Catholic woman so what do you think besides I have always had my faith I just do not push my own personal faith onto other people" she said "but I gotta go before Becky and Connor kill each other"

"Ok baby I love you" he said with a small laugh.

"I love you too and we'll see you soon"

John hung up his phone and a small smile that could only be brought on by his family. Across the room he saw a very somber looking Vince McMahon. The smile left his face as he walked over to his boss.

"Vince I am very sorry for your loss" he shook the older man's hand.

"I believe it should be me who says that to you" Vince remarked.

John grimaced "Yeah that was a little unexpected seeing as I am engaged to the mother of my 2 children"

"Well that's Kelly for you … she always said she wanted to go out in a blaze of glory, no pun intended"

"What happened?"

"Well apparently Kelly and her friends were cruising the California interstate when the driver passed out or something like that and they ended up crashing into a tree and there was a gas leak which ignited the whole car in a matter of seconds"

"Wow what a horrible way to go" John found himself saying "where there any survivors?"

"One girl did survive but they were all so badly burned there was no way of identifying her or any of the others"

John shook his head in disgust "I think I'm going to go"

"I think it would be understandable for the victim's former fiancée to not be able to handle everything and leave early"

"Thanks Vince"

--

I was dark by the time John arrived back to the rented cabin. Everyone had already been in bed for hours. He quietly made it to the room he and Ashley were sharing. He shed his clothes leaving them in a pile on the floor. He got into bed and wrapped his arms around his real fiancée.

"John" she sleepily asked.

"Yeah baby it's me" he kissed her temple.

"What are you doing back so soon?" she asked.

"I missed you guys too much so I caught an earlier flight"

"Oh ok"

"Ash, promise me something"

"Ok …"

"Promise me you will never leave me alone" he told her.

"What?" she propped her head up on her pillow to look at him.

"Please just promise me," he pleaded.

"Fine I promise I will never leave you"

"Thank you" he kissed her lips softly.

She rested her head against the pillow again and fell back to sleep. John stared up at the ceiling thinking of what might have been. If he had done things differently with Kelly would she be alive now? He wasn't sure but what he did know is he felt just a responsible as if he was driving that car himself.


	58. Chapter 58

"Ugh I can't stand that fake ass bitch ... I can't even finish watching this movie cause she makes me sick" Dommy practically gagged.

She and Ashley had been watching Maid of Honor with the guys and upon seeing Kelly Carlson Dommy freaked out.

"Come on Dommy she's a really sweet person" John tried to defend his one time co-star.

"That's dedication ... this dude is helping the woman he loves plan a wedding to another man" Randy said.

"John would you have been my maid of honor if I was marrying another guy?" Ashley asked.

"Umm let me think ... hell no"

"So you don't love me that much is what you are trying to say?" she asked crossing her arms over her chest.

"Now watch my man get out of this" Randy whispered to Dommy "he's a master"

"Well baby I love you so much that I would never be able to let you get married to another guy" he kissed the tip of her nose.

"Yeah you are still sleeping on the couch buddy"

"Burn" Dommy whispered smugly back to Randy.

"What you two fail to remember is that as much as you guys think you are big womanizers Ashley has known John for most of her adult life so she is able to see through his bs that and women are born with bs detectors"

"Baby is that true?" John asked.

Ashley nodded in agreement. "It tis true love"

"I love when she speaks like that" Randy grinned.

"You have issues" Dommy rolled her eyes.

"I love your accent as well"

"You still have issues"

"For the last time Connor I said no!" Becky exclaimed plopping down as well as she could in her very pregnant state. Followed closely by Connor.

"Fine we'll put it to a vote"

"Ash, if you were able to give John a biological son wouldn't you want to name it after him"

Everyone's eyes moved from Connor to Ashley. They were waiting for her to kick her younger brother's ass. She just smiled as she stood up and walked in front of him. She "patted" his cheek a little harder than he would have liked.

"If Connor Benoit Sr. wants to live to see Connor Benoit Jr. then I suggest you'd better shut your mouth while you are ahead" she told him sweetly.

"But there will not be a Connor Benoit Jr. so there is no need to even think about it"

"I don't understand men's fascination with naming their sons after themselves" Dommy added her two cents.

"But to answer your question little brother yes if I could have a biological son I'd name him John"

"Would you really?" John asked flattered.

"Don't get all excited John it has nothing to do with you I just like the name John" Dommy couldn't help but chuckle at the defeated look on John's face after Ashley broke his spirit yet again.

"Now if you excuse me I'm going to try and get some rest" Becky said trying to get up from the chair. "Ugh John come here"

John walked over to her and helped her up "Thank you"

"Your welcome" he replied.

"Connor don't follow" she made it as far as the doorway before stopping.

"Becks what's the matter?" Connor asked.

"I'm bleeding" she replied looking at the huge red stain that was seeping all over her jeans.

"Oh shit!" Ashley and Dommy both found themselves saying at the same time.

"Move little brother we gotta bet your baby mama to the hospital" Ashley yelled when she noticed Connor's frozen state.

"Fabo hold down the forth while we are gone" Ashley yelled to Fabo because she knew he was close by.

"What's going on?" he asked entering the room.

"Becky is bleeding from her womanly area" Dommy tried to be delicate about it.

"Oh damn ... that's not good"

"Thank you for your medical expertise Fabo" Ashley replied dryly as she grabbed her coat.

"Don't worry Becky everything is going to be fine" Ashley assured the very scared young girl.

"I hope" she added under her breath.


	59. Chapter 59

Bright lights surrounded her, disorientation kept her from opening her mouth. She wasn't sure if she was awake or unconscious anymore. Where was she and what was she doing? She wasn't sure anymore. A voice broke through the haze. She thought it might have been Connor's voice but she couldn't be sure.

"They have to take the baby now" she heard someone say.

"Placental abruption" someone else said.

"The baby isn't getting any air we have to move quickly"

"Do what you have to do to save both Becky and the baby" she heard Connor's voice again.

Her eyes were open but she couldn't focus them. She wanted to close her eyes but she couldn't. Had they sedated her? She wasn't sure all she knew was something was wrong with the baby. The innocent little baby could possibly die before he or she would ever be born. Then everything went black.

She was standing in a meadow somewhere, she had never been here before but now here she was. The warm sun shined on her face. She closed her eyes enjoying the peace for a moment. When she felt someone tug on her sleeve. She looked down to see a little boy about 3 or 4. His suntanned face was slightly covered in freckles. He was grinning up at her.

"Hello" she said.

"Hello" he replied in return.

"What are you doing here all alone?" she asked.

"Waiting" he replied nonchalantly.

"Waiting for what?" she asked.

"Waiting to be born"

"What do you mean waiting to be born?" she asked giving the young boy a quizzical look.

"I'm still inside you" he placed his hand on her now flat stomach.

She took the time to really look at him. The boy had dirty blonde curls; the same color all of the Benoit children had as young children. He smiled up at her and she could see the dimples the boy shared with his father. His eyes were her's though. He laughed at her sudden puzzlement. The corners of his eyes crinkled as he did so. God he looked so much like Connor. She frowned at this, you carry someone for nine months and you kinda hope you get more representation.

He looked up and smiled again "I gotta go" he said "I'll see you soon"

Before she even had time to blink he was gone. Leaving her all alone again.

--

"We got a girl here" one of the surgeons announced holding up the tiny infant. Nurses took her away quickly to clean her up and then she would be sent straight to the NICU. Connor stole a few seconds to gaze at his daughter. She was crying, her little fists flailing in the air. Her face was red from crying but other than that she was perfect.

"Nurse get some more blankets stat" Connor sent a confused glance back to the people who were working on Becky.

"Doc, what's going on?" Connor asked.

"We went to close Becky up and we found another placenta" the surgeon explained.

"English please?"

"There is another baby in here somewhere"

"That's impossible" Connor stated.

"Oh really" he then held up the other baby for Connor to see. "It's a boy".

A boy … a son. The baby was so small he didn't even register as a baby to Connor. His skin was translucent and Connor could see his veins from where he stood. The nurses took him away without even letting Connor see his son.

"He wasn't crying" Connor finally found his voice.

"No he wasn't" the surgeon said "I'm not going to lie it doesn't look good for your son"

Connor felt like he couldn't breathe. He left the room and began pacing the hall. He tried pulling out his hair but that did nothing but give him a headache. He needed to talk to someone; someone who he knew would make him feel better. He needed the person who he knew always had his back no matter what. He needed his sister.

"Ashley" Connor called standing by the opening that lead to the operating rooms. Ashley looked at him curiously as she came to stand next to him.

"What's up little brother?" she asked.

"I'm freaking out here"

"Talk to me" she wrapped a comforting arm around his shoulders.

"Becks has twins but they don't think the boy is gonna make it and he wasn't crying and I'm so confused and overwhelmed and I don't know what to do"

"Start by taking a deep breath" she instructed him which he did.

"Now let's take a walk"

"Where are we going?" he asked.

"Well I want some coffee and after that we can kidnap Dommy and go see your kids"

"How are you not freaking out?" he asked.

"Have you met my son, he survived hours outside in the cold air and he made it and is now a very happy well adjusted toddler" she smiled as she looked through the glass pained glass to see Phinnigan playing with his toy cars with Dean. "Besides the babies are in a top notch Neonatal Intensive Care Unit ... let modern medicine do its job"

"Thanks for talking me down" Connor said.

"You are my little brother … there's no need to thank me"

"How about we skip the coffee and just go see the kids"

Ashley nodded "Let me go get Dommy"

Ashley returned a few moments later with Dommy. The younger girl was a little confused as to why she had been summoned.

"We're gonna go see the babies" Ashley informed her.

"Oh ok" she was still a little confused.

They made their way up to the NICU and were asked to put on gowns and scrub their arms up to their elbows. The girl was alert and Connor went to see her first. She was crying as her family approached.

"So daddy what's her name?" Dommy asked.

"Logan Christina Benoit" he replied.

Ashley was standing next to the fragile little boy's incubator. She fearfully stuck her hand inside and ran one finger down his back. She could feel his tiny bones as she did so.

"What about him Con?" Ashley asked.

Connor debated for a moment. Not sure if he wanted to give the boy a name just in case he didn't make it. But that was selfish of him, of course this innocent little baby deserved a name.

"Kieran Sawyer Benoit" he gazed sheepishly in his sister's direction. She gave him an irritated look.

Kieran Sawyer was her name. The name she had decided a long time ago to name her first born son. But she had had her chance to name Phinnigan that and she didn't so she really couldn't judge.

"Fine" she sighed.

"Don't worry Con this little guy is a fighter" Ashley assured him.

"I think you are right" Connor said coming over to stand next to his sister.

"He's a Benoit after all and one thing can be said about us we are stubborn as hell and he won't give up without a fight"


	60. Chapter 60

"It's ok baby girl daddy has you" Connor paced tiredly as he tried uselessly to calm Logan's frantic wails. "please stop crying … please".

He knew having a baby would be hard but he never imagined it would be this hard. Between work and taking care of Logan and relieving Ashley from staying with Kieran so she could go home to her own family, it was starting to get to him.

--

3 days earlier …

"Ash thanks for coming with me to pick Becky and Logan up"

"No problem" Ashley assured him. She made sure she had the diaper bag was secure on her shoulder.

"I can't wait for Becky to see what I did for the twin's bedroom" the giddy excitement was not hidden from his voice. Although it would have been so much better if Kieran could come home too but unfortunately he still wasn't ready to come home.

"You're gonna be a great dad Con" Ashley told him.

"Thanks sis" he gave her a little squeeze.

"Now let's get your baby girl home"

"Becks you are gonna be amazed at what I did to the nursery" Connor said as he entered the room but frowned when all he found was Logan asleep strapped into her car seat. Ashley followed behind him into the room, the huge smile she had sported on her face also turned into a frown identical to her little brother's.

Connor slowly walked over to the sleeping baby and picked up a folded yellow note that was sticking out between the straps.

_Connor,_

_Ashley is right I am way too young to handle this. If you don't want to keep the babies I understand all I want for them is to grow up in a safe and healthy environment._

_Becky_

"It's her loss" Connor angrily crumbled up the note and picked up Logan's carrier "it's ok princess your daddy will never abandon you like your scumbag of a mother did"


	61. Chapter 61

"Ok Logan everything is gonna be alright" Connor assured his infant daughter as he strapped her into her carrier. "We're just gonna go visit Auntie Ashley and Uncle John for a little while"

--

"Hey Con what's up man?" John asked allowing his future brother in law into his home.

"Could you do me a huge favor?" Connor asked.

"I have to swing by work and pick something up and then I'm gonna go and relieve Ashley from sitting with Kieran for a little while" he added.

"Sure I have nothing pressing to do" John agreed. "Come here little princess" he cooed taking Logan out of her carrier. "We'll be fine won't we?"

"Thanks man I owe you one" Connor clapped him on the back before leaving.

With a heavy heart he walked out of his sister's home thinking that he wouldn't see his kids for a while, never knowing that he would once see them once more before he lost his life.

--

"Guys I'm home" an exhausted looking Ashley dropped her bag by the front door and shuffled tiredly across the foyer and into the kitchen. John was just feeding all the kids. Dean, Phinnigan, and Faith were sitting at the table eating pizza and John was leaning against the counter feeding Logan a bottle.

"What's Logan doing here?" Ashley asked confused.

"Didn't Connor tell you when he relieved you of Kieran duty?" John asked.

"I never saw Connor today" Ashley remarked. "That son of a …" she remembered the kids were listening. She grabbed the cordless phone and dialed Connor's number.

"_This number has been disconnected at the user's request"_

"I'm going to kill him" she dialed a different number.

"Dad … your son just left his daughter with us and took off and to make matters worse he had his house phone and his cell turned off … I don't think he is coming back" she sighed tiredly.

"This is the last thing these two babies need" she pulled at her hair a little bit.

"Yes if I hear anything I will let you know" she sighed again hanging up the phone.

"What are we gonna do?" John asked wrapping his arms around her.

"We can't really do anything until we hear from him and then maybe we can convince him to come back but until then looks like we have another house guest … damn we need a bigger house" she laughed sadly.

"We can do that … we can build a bigger house and we can even have a guest house built so that Randy and Dommy have their privacy" John suggested.

"Sounds nice sweetie but I'm going to bed I've been up since 5 am"

"Ok kids you heard your mom we're gonna be really quiet so she can rest"

"Is Logan gonna live with us forever?" Dean asked.

"I'm not sure kiddo"

"Great another sister" he made a face.

"Take it from a guy who never had sisters they are really important … you boys are gonna be the ones who look after them and make sure they meet nice guys who will treat them right and if they don't then you get to kick the stuffing out of them"

"We get to beat people up?" Dean asked.

"Well yeah but only if they hurt your sisters" he explained "you just can't go around beating people up because you want to"

"Isn't that what you do Uncle John?" Dean asked.

"Ok kids it's bed time"


	62. Chapter 62

John was making funny faces at Logan while Fabo eyed him from across the kitchen. "I'll be damned if you make me a grandfather again before putting a wedding band on that young lady's finger".

"Dad as far as I'm concerned Ashley and I are already married which means that her family is my family and you always taught us kids that there was nothing more important than family" he outsmarted the older man with one of his own life lessons. He smirked proudly at himself as he watched his father desperately try to think of a comeback.

"Just marry the girl already" he huffed walking away.

John rolled his eyes and continued to make Logan laugh. "Don't mind him sweetie he's just a grumpy old man".

"I heard that" the older man yelled from the other room.

"I'm shaking in my sneakers Fabo" the younger man retorted.

"Leave Fabo alone" Ashley defended the old man emerging from the back of the house fully showered with a towel on her head. She headed towards the fridge and pulled out a bottle of apple juice. She retrieved a clean cup from the dish rack on the counter and poured herself some. Then she hopped up onto the counter content on taking in her surroundings.

"Why does he get to start it and I get yelled at?" John asked giving his fiancée a kiss good morning.

"Cause he's Fabo and there is no other reason needed" she turned her head to smell the air. "John Cena Sr. if I come in there to discover that you are smoking I swear I will rain down the fires of hell upon you and you won't like me very much when I am angry!"

"Woman get off my case already I'm a grown man … I created the man you are going to marry so without me you'd be SOL"

"Or I could have always met and married Randy" she countered shuddering. John winced as well, he didn't want to have to think about that.

"Who's getting married?" Dommy asked. She was just getting in which was odd for her and Randy usually they were homebodies.

"Apparently Ashley and Randy would have been married if I was never born" John informed her.

"That's funny because I happen to know that it is actually me and Randy who are getting married" she showed them the sparkling diamond that now sat on her ring finger.

Ashley, speechless for once, hopped off the counter and hugged her cousin tightly. The speechlessness didn't last long once the man in question walked into the house and there was yelling and celebrating. A sleepy-eyed Dean and Phinnigan came out of their room to see what was going on.

"Why is everyone yellin?" Dean asked yawning.

"Dean … I have some very important news to tell you" Randy knelt down so he was the same height as his son. "I asked Dommy to be my wife which means that she's going to be your new mom"

"I don't want a new mom" he yelled. "Auntie Ashley is my mom … and I don't want another one". He boys protested running away from his father and slamming his bedroom door.

"Awkward" Ashley remarked.

All eyes were on her now "What … I didn't ask him to freak out like that or anything … and you Randal should have consulted him before making such a big decision … no offense cousin … because it is not only your lives you are affecting this is just as much about him as it is about you" she scolded the other adults in order to save her own ass.

"Ash is right Randy" Dommy admitted.

Ashley breathed a sigh of relief. She crossed her arms and put on her most stubborn face, the one that dared people to mess with her. She couldn't stop herself, she was on a roll. "You should know better Randal"

"This is pure BS … she's only scolding you guys cause she doesn't want you guys to be mad at her" Fabo interjected.

"Fabo you are heading for a home" she threatened. Then she placed her hands back on her hips in a justifying manner. "But he is right … I do everything for that little boy so it is only natural for him to think I'm his mom … screwed up yes … but true none the less … now everything is going to change and that is probably scaring the hell out of him so instead of getting mad at me why don't you guys go talk to him".

"I'll go talk to him" Randy turned and left the kitchen.

"Don't even give me that look Domonique Marie"

--

"Dean can we talk?" the lump under the covers of Dean's bed did not move. But his hand stuck out from under the covers in it was the remote to his Ipod dock. He hit the power button and Jai Ho from the Slumdog Millionaire blared from the speakers. Randy sent a weirded out look towards the lump under the bed. "Please Dean talk to me" Randy crawled into bed with his son grabbing the remote from him and shut the music off.

"Talk to me …"

"No"

"Please Dean … Daddy doesn't want you to be mad at him"

"Too bad"

"Dean I love you and I know that I should have consulted you first but you gotta cut me some slack kiddo I'm still very new at this" he reasoned. "I'm not used to having to check every little action with another person." Dean sniffled but remained silent.

"But nothing is going to change I know you think of Auntie Ashley as your mommy and in a way she is but you love Dommy and I love her too so why not let her into our family?" he reasoned.

"I don't want a new mommy"

"Ok … well how about you just have a Dommy" Dean looked at him skeptically. "You can take your time with everything but I need my best man to be in the wedding".

"Best man huh?" Dean asked.

"If you still want to think of Ashley as your mom that's fine but don't be mean to Dommy because she loves the both of us ok"

"Uh huh" he nodded.

"We cool?" Randy asked.

"Maybe"

"I love you Dean"

"I love you too Daddy" he wrapped his arms around the Legend Killer's neck.

"We've been through a lot together kid and you gotta remember that I always have your best interest at heart because I'm your dad and that is my job".


	63. Chapter 63

"**So everything is gonna be ready so when I get back here with Kieran we can celebrate right?" Ashley asked her fiancée.**

"**Yes, everything will be ready" he assured her.**

"**Poor little man has been through so much already all I wanna do is welcome him home in style and make him feel wanted".**

"**He is wanted hun" he swatted her backside playfully. "Now go and get him".**

"**I'm going" she laughed as she grabbed her keys and headed out the door.**

**--**

"**Kids … we're here" Chris yelled walking into his daughter and her fiancée's home. Followed closely behind by his girlfriend Lilian and their foster son Quentin.**

"**Gampa … Gampa" Phinnigan hollered as he ran to greet his grandfather. Chris scooped his oldest grandchild up into his arms.**

"**Can you say hi to Lilian?" Chris asked his grandson.**

"**Hi, Lilan"**

"**Hi sweetie" she leaned in to give him a kiss on the cheek.**

"**Hi Grandpa … hi Lilian" Dean emerged from the bedroom he shared with Phinnigan.**

"**Dean get over here and give your grandpa a hug" Chris ordered. He had become very fond of the older boy and felt bad that he had his whole family killed in a car crash and had spent most of his short life in an orphanage. The boy did as he was told and Chris kissed the top of his head as he had also done with Phinnigan.**

"**How are my boys doing today?" Chris asked.**

"**Good" they both replied at the same time.**

"**Hi Uncle Quentin" Dean bounded over to the teen. Phinnigan followed in suit.**

"**Hi Unca Q" Phinnigan repeated in his own way.**

"**Hey my lil dawgs" he gave both of them a high-five.**

"**Where are my girls?" Chris asked.**

"**Here they are ready to party" John announced walking into the room with Faith. Fabo had Logan, both girls were dressed in little party dresses with barrettes in their hair.**

"**Aww I don't know which one I wanna hold first"**

**Faith held her arms out to him making his decision for him. "Come here Grandpa's princess". He took the toddler from her father. "Who's my girl … who's my girl?" Chris cooed.**

"**Damn Chris I never get that kind attention" Lilian kidded her boyfriend.**

"**That's not what you were saying last night" the father of 3 and grandfather of 4 replied with a huge grin.**

"**Ok I just threw up in my mouth" John remarked taking his daughter from her grandfather. "Come here sweetie your grandfather is a perv"**

"**It's ok I still have my other little girl" he took Logan from Fabo. "Look at you my sweet little one you look so beautiful"**

**--**

"**We're home everyone" Ashley announced about 30 minutes later.**

"**Perfect timing baby I was just about to put the food on the grill" John gave his fiancée a kiss.**

**Music could be heard coming from the backyard and from where she stood she could hear voices talking and laughing.**

**Ashley headed towards the back yard with the 11 week old baby in his carrier. Balloons and streamers were hung up across the backyard. She smiled and looked down at the sleeping. "This is all for you little guy".**

"**There's my guy" Chris didn't even let Ashley get all the way outside before he commanded that the baby be given to him.**

"**Geez dad Nazi much?" she unbuckled the baby from his carrier and allowed her dad to take him.**

"**Gampa I wanna see da baby" Phinnigan made a b-line for his grandfather and Kieran. Chris allowed the little boy to sit in his lap as he held the baby.**

"**You were this small once Phinney".**

"**Say what you want about the man but he's crazy about his grandkids" John said snaking his arms around his fiancée's waist.**

"**Yeah … it's pretty great" she agreed giving him a huge smile. "I'm glad you are ok with this … I know it's a little much but with their mom and dad gone I just couldn't have them be anywhere else".**

"**Its fine Ash, it really is we're a family so that makes them my family too and I take care of my family".**

"**How did I end up with such an amazing man?" she asked.**

"**I have no idea" he laughed.**

"**Family … I'm here" Keegan yelled from inside the house.**

"**Out back Keegs" Ashley called to him.**

"**Hey everyone" he greeted his family. "I have some huge news … I'm engaged!".**

"**Lilian take the baby I think I might be having a stroke" Chris told his girlfriend. Ashley's eyes met her father's. She looked as happy about this as he did.**

**Keegan motioned for someone to come forward. Ashley and John's eyes widened with surprise. Neither could utter a word.**

"**Alex …" Ashley finally managed to say.**


	64. Chapter 64

"Keegan you were the one child I didn't have to worry about" Chris paced in front of his youngest child. "I blame your sister for this … if she hadn't started bringing home kids then maybe you and Connor wouldn't be in the situations you are in right now"

"Hey don't group me in with Con I would never dump my children off on Ashley and John and another thing dad I am not in a situation. I love Alex and I asked her to marry me what's the big deal?"

"The big deal is she is the mother of your oldest nephew and his younger sister" he hissed.

"Wow … I knew she had kids but I did not know that they were related to me … so that doesn't bother me I will be Uncle Daddy Keegan"

"She's too old for you"

"She's only two years older than I am and you were four years older that our mother" Keegan pointed out.

"I wasn't a freshman in college"

"Yea … because never going to college is just so much better" Keegan rolled his eyes.

"John got engaged young and look what happened to him" Chris was trying one last attempt to convince his son not to get married.

"He looks like he's gotten over it nicely" Keegan stated not backing down in the slightest.

"You asked for it" Chris walked away.

"He's all yours kid" Chris gave his daughter permission to rip her brother a new one.

"It will be my pleasure"

--

Everyone watched as Ashley tore into her little brother. John and Randy winced both of them taking solace that it wasn't them.

"Daddy why mommy yellin at Unca Keegan?" Phinnigan asked.

"Don't worry about it son" Phinnigan climbed up into his father's lap and relished that his little sister was no where around to steal the attention. John kissed the young boy's temple.

"I love you daddy"

"Love you too Buddy"

--

"You ok Sweetie?" Lilian asked taking a seat next to Alex.

"I swear I had no idea" she put her face in her hands.

"Don't worry about that" Lilian placed a comforting hand on the young woman's shoulder. "But you have to know that Keegan is the baby of the family and as such they are all really protective of him, especially now that Ashley and Keegan's other brother Connor has gone MIA"

"He's the twins father right?" Alex asked.

"Yes"

"So what is Ashley's deal? I mean why does she care so much?"

"Their mom died when the kids were still kinda young so Ashley became their substitute mother. So it is almost like that is Keegan's mother ripping into him and not his older sister." Lilian shrugged. "That and Ashley is insane". Alex didn't know whether to laugh or be extremely scared, but then Lilian let out a hearty laugh. "I'm kidding".

"So tell me what is Ashley and John's back story" Alex's enthusiasm wasn't missed by the blonde ring announcer. It was Alex's turn to shrug. "I've just been curious as to what kind of people were raising my children".

"They met when Ashley was 19 in California. They dated for a little while and then Ashley broke it off because she was afraid of getting too serious with him. John being the love sick fool he was and still is agreed thinking that having her as a friend would be better than not having her at all. They remained that way for a long time until Phinnigan was dropped into their laps. That little boy sped up a process that would have taken forever to get this far. Those two crazy kids love Phinnigan and Faith more than they love even their own lives."

"I made the right decision then". Alex nodded her head to herself. She was finally coming completely to peace with the decisions she had made to give up her children.

"You made 4 people into a family".

--

"Ashley it is my life and I am an adult" Keegan yelled back at his sister. Both of them had inherited their mother's wild Irish temper.

"Boy-o you will be certainly ruining yer life if you go through with this" Ashley's thick Irish brogue shone through.

"Quit with the Irish speak will ya".

"You are barely an adult and you want to get married" she continued to yell at him. "Did you learn nothing about rushing into hasty decisions from Connor?"

"Take a look at your own life before trying to tell me what to do Ashley" he shot back at her. "When are you going to marry that man? Is it going to be some time in the next 10 years or what. You have only been putting that man through the ringer for most of your adult life."

"That is none of yer business Keegan Shaun Benoit" oh yes she was pissed. It was an Irish thing to call someone by their full name when they were mad. Obviously Ashley hadn't missed the day they were teaching that cultural lesson.

"I am not breaking off this engagement and if I have to disown myself to be able to marry Alex then I will do so because I love her."

"You are a stubborn arsehole you know that right".

Keegan smiled because he knew that the worst was over.

He stood and kissed his sister's forehead. "I love you too Ashley." He smiled before stepping through the sliding door to reunite with his fiancée.

"That boy will be the death of me." She shook her head in disgusted frustration.

"Let him live his life hun" John wrapped his arms around her waist.

"He is making a huge mistake." She shot back at him.

'It's his mistake to make. But maybe it isn't a mistake, maybe they will get married and be happy. You need to leave your brother alone before he starts to resent you for trying to control his life." He kissed her lips softly.

"Have I been putting you through the ringer for most of my adult life?" she asked him.

"Yea." He agreed with a small smirk. "But if I didn't like it I wouldn't be around now."

"I'm sorry I am always such a neurotic mess." She frowned.

"It's ok baby we accept you for who you are." She punched him in the shoulder. "You are an arsehole just like my brother."

John took a play out of Keegan's book. He too kissed the top of her head and told her he loved her. She gaped at him as he too walked away from her.

"What the hell just happened!" she exclaimed.

"You just got outsmarted by your Dumbass fiancée and Keegan" Dommy informed her.

"Shut yer mouth you wench"

"Oh that's nice I was on your side." Dommy mocked being hurt.

"Dean come here sweetie." Ashley smirked as the little boy came running over to her. She picked him up and gave him a big hug. "How about your favorite person in the whole wide world makes you the biggest ice cream sundae you have ever seen."

"Cool!" Dean exclaimed.

"Just remember who loves you more than anyone else in the world." She kissed his temple.

"That is low Ash."

"All is fair in love and war." The older woman yelled back at her.


End file.
